A/N: well here we are at chapter seven. Houjun isn't mine but Hana is and here we go…
As the night went steadily on all around the hospital, there wasn't a sound to be heard. Soft moonlight filtered through the windows set every so often in the walls to bathe the tiled hallways in its soothing light and, if you listened closely, you could almost hear the wind whispering gentle lullabies to the patients within. Everything was quiet and sterile, as it always was, and in the middle of this peace a single, frightened sob was suddenly heard.
It was pitch black, except for the faint glimmer of moonlight through the treetops, and Hana was running. She didn't know where she was going; she just knew she had to get wherever she was headed as fast as she could. She dodged trees and other greenery, jumping over deep chasms of inky blackness, willing herself to go faster as she realized that she was not alone in the infinite darkness. Something was coming for her and, without knowing what the thing was Hana knew it was something she should fear. She darted around a patch of thorny rose bushes, feeling her heart pounding in her chest and her lungs burning for lack of air. The young nurse threw a frantic glance over her shoulder, desperately trying to see what was behind her. What she saw nearly made her heart stop. The thing was catching up, its massive black wings arching out from its back and curling around its shapeless body. Its clawed hands reached for her, blindly seeking out the young woman, fangs gleaming in the darkness as it let out an unearthly howl of fury.
With each passing second it came closer and closer and Hana knew it was only a matter of time before it claimed her entirely. Suddenly she slipped and the nurse felt herself falling, but instead of landing on the forest floor she slid over the edge of one of the black voids. She reached out and managed to grab hold of the edge of the pit, all the while knowing it was futile. If she didn't fall to her doom, the shadow-demon would surely overtake her.
She closed her eyes and waited for death to come, tears streaking down her face and her entire body trembling in terror. Footsteps reverberated on the ground above her and a pair of hands suddenly seized her wrists, dragging her upwards almost lovingly. Hana's eyes flew open in shock and she looked up into the face of Hell itself. The hideous fangs shone sliver in the faint light as the demon's face split into a vicious grin and it pulled her into its arms, enfolding the tiny woman in its leathery black wings as the fangs came closer and closer to her face…
Hana awoke with a start, covered in a cold sweat and shaking like a leaf. "I-it wasn't… real…" she told herself in a trembling whisper, trying to calm her panicked breathing. "I-it- it was only a dream…n-nothing to be afraid of….only a dream…" Her last words caught on a sob and she buried her face in her hands, shaking worse than ever.
Without warning, a hand reached out of the soft darkness of the room and gently touched Hana's shoulder. The nurse gasped and flinched back from the touch, drawing her knees close to her chest and burying her face in them. The hand was quickly removed from her shoulder and Hana heard the shuffling of material against concrete before the same hands lightly caught her face between two palms and lifted her head from her knees so that she was facing whoever was in front of her.
Through her tears, Hana could make out Houjun's worried face in the moonlight that shone from the window. His mahogany eyes were wide and full of concern as he carefully brushed a tear from Hana's soaking cheek.
"Oh, it's you Houjun." the nurse breathed in relief "I'm sorry…I didn't mean to wake you…"
Houjun shook his head, his anxious brown eyes searching Hana's terrified green ones.
"I-it's okay…I'm fine." Hana tried to reassure him "I-it was only…only a dream…" She choked on the words again and dissolved into helpless sobs as images of the black demon came unbidden to her mind. And then Houjun was there, lifting Hana from the chair and cradling her in a compassionate embrace. The nurse was shaking in Houjun's arms, her face buried in his chest and her hands gripping his pajama top for dear life as she sobbed uncontrollably.
"I was… it was…so s-scared…" she choked, absolute terror making her incoherent as she tried to explain the reason for her tears to Houjun "The-the darkness…it had me….I-I w-was…like l-last t-time…f-falling into n-nothing and th-then…I almost-I-it almost got me!… An-and it almost t-took… took me away…from… f-from you… and I almost… and, my God! Those horrible, glowing eyes! B-blood red a-and…" She trailed off again, burying her face in the soft fabric of Houjun's pajamas as her sobs redoubled and her trembling increased to the point that her vision began to blur.
Houjun sighed heavily; his eyes wide with a mix of sympathy and shock as he bit back a gasp of surprise. He never would have expected this little development to take place. Hana was too confident and full of hope to have these kinds of demons inside her…She was the brave one; she was the one with the answers and the courage, not him! Houjun looked back down at the fearful woman trembling in his arms and suddenly her first words of reassurance to him came floating to the top of his conscious thoughts. 'I used to be in a situation like yours… for years I was living in Hell until one day someone reached out a hand and pulled me out.'
So she wasn't as perfect as he'd first thought…Houjun frowned and shook his head to clear it. Of course she wasn't perfect! What an idiotic thing to think! She probably had the same internal scars he had, reoccurring nightmares, a deep-seated fear of other people… the kind of scars that would never fully heal.
He pulled the nurse closer, his heart clenching painfully in his ribcage as he thought of her hurting so badly. He lay his head on top of hers and gently stroked her hair, giving her soft kisses on top of her head every so often. Hana clung to him and the more she cried, the more Houjun pulled her to him. He sat there with the young nurse cradled protectively against his chest, letting her cry out her fear and grief , wishing he could do more than just offer silent comfort to the obviously suffering young woman.
After a while Hana's sobs calmed themselves into quiet hiccups and her trembling lessened to barely-noticeable shivering, her small form going limp with exhaustion in Houjun's arms. The young man continued to hold her, rubbing her back and rocking slowly from side to side with the young woman.
"Daijobu…" he whispered his voice barely audible even in the silence of the room "Mou, daijobu…anata wa anzen ima…shh…"
Houjun's eyes widened in surprise as the words came tumbling from his mouth before he could stop them. He looked down at Hana to see if she had noticed and found that the nurse had cried herself to sleep. The young man smiled sadly and carefully lifted the young woman's slight form in his strong arms. He set her down on his bed and pulled the covers up around her chin. She shuddered once as a corner of the blankets brushed against her arm and then lay still, her fragile form appearing even smaller as she curled up into a tight little ball, gripping a corner of the soft sheets in one hand. Tears still slipped from beneath her closed eyes to fall silently onto the covers, and Houjun sat down on the edge of the bed. He caught a teardrop on the end of his finger and watched as the tiny droplet sparkled in the moonlight for a second then slid from his hand to shatter on his knees. He sighed again, then leaned forwards and gave the nurse a gentle, yet firm kiss on top of her head.
"Boku no… Hana…"he murmured as he pulled away "My…flower…"
He watched her sleep for awhile, wondering what could drive her to such a sorry state and trying to keep himself from crying. His eyes began to close before long though, as it was still the middle of the night and Houjun got reluctantly to his feet to get a spare blanket from his dresser. He spread the blanket out on the floor next to his bed and shut his eyes, thinking that if Hana woke up again at least he'd be nearby.
Suddenly sunlight was streaming through the window, falling softly over Hana's face and spilling over the side of the bed to play over Houjun's pale cheeks. The young man's eyelashes fluttered for a second, trying to block out the golden rays of light, then suddenly flew open as he remembered Hana and the events of the previous night. He sat bolt upright, scrambling to his knees and gripping the edge of the bed tightly as he worriedly examined the still-sleeping nurse's features.
Hana was still curled into a tight little ball, her face pale and streaked with tiny lines of dried tears, but other than that she looked almost…peaceful. Houjun stared in wonder as he watched the nurse's chest slowly rise and then fall with each breath she took. His brow creased in confusion and he reached out to take his notebook off the night table.
Settling himself cross-legged on the floor with his back resting lightly against the bed frame, he opened the book to a blank page and just sat there for while, staring at the light blue lines and red margins on the paper. He looked up at Hana's small form again then suddenly, he knew what he wanted to write.
'Hope. It's a funny word because it can at once be reassuring and damning, cheerful and full darkness… When one feels hope, it's almost as if the world has become less of a frightening place and the problems we go through seem to diminish as the hope grows. But then as things go from bad to worse we feel that our hope has all been for nothing, that the few moments of possibility were all just an illusion and the feeling of happiness fades to be replaced by one of utter despair. Hope is a very fragile thing and yet it is also unbreakable once it is solid…
I never thought I would be able to feel hope again, but then she came and everything was alright for a while. I was in her arms and the world had light in it again, my life had a purpose-has a purpose. Then last night, as I held her, helpless to stop her tears from falling, I realized something. I realized that I do not have hope; I have faith. Faith is a solid, unyielding belief in something or someone. Faith turns all doubt to certainty and, as long as you never lose it, it the strongest form of trust you can place in something. I did not have faith last night, not in myself or in Hana. I had hope that she would calm when I held her, hope that my mere presence would be enough, but I did not believe and so the self- doubt made me unable to reassure her fears. I didn't believe in Hana, didn't believe she could stop crying, didn't believe I could reassure her and so I failed her. But somehow I know she won't fail me, I know she won't fail even when I do lose both hope and faith… She'll save my sinner's soul. After all if she doesn't, who else will?'
As Houjun set his pencil back in the spiral and shut the notebook, he heard a soft knocking on his door. His eyes widened in apprehension and he shrank back into the corner formed by his bed and the night table. The gentle tapping came again, this time accompanied by a reassuring voice.
"Houjun? Are you in there? If you are, open the door please." It was Dr. Johnston. Houjun's eyes widened even more as real fear began to fill his mind and he drew his knees to his chest, holding his notebook close to him like a security blanket. What did the doctor want with him? Was he back to stick more needles in his arms? Would he call those terrifying men to lock him in that coat again?
For the third time, Dr. Johnston rapped his knuckles against the door and for the third time Houjun tried to push himself into the solid oak of his night table.
The doorknob twisted and Dr. Johnston's officious tones broke the silence once more. "I'm coming in now, okay? Don't be afraid, I'm just going to step inside and see if you're alright." the doctor called quietly, sounding like he was trying to convince a scared kitten to come out of hiding.
The door opened halfway and Houjun saw Dr. Johnston cautiously inch around the doorframe and step into the room. The doctor held a bag of medical supplies in one hand and a two-way walkie-talkie was sticking out of his coat pocket. Houjun winced and buried his face in his knees, screwing his eyes shut as he felt the doctor's footsteps drawing nearer and nearer. The young man suddenly felt a hand close on his shoulder and his head snapped up, right fist lashing out instinctively to ward off the owner of the hand.
Dr. Johnston let out a surprised yelp as he sat down hard on the cold floor of Houjun's room. "What was that all about!?" the doctor demanded, fixing Houjun with an annoyed glare "I gave you fair-" The older man's words trailed off as he caught sight of the small form huddled in the bed. "My god!" he exclaimed in horror "Is that…" The man bolted to his feet and looked down into Hana's pale face. "It is! What have you done to her? Hana! Hana, wake up! "
Dr. Johnston grabbed Hana's shoulder and shook her, not harshly but firmly enough to pull her back to the conscious world. The nurse woke with a start and let out a frightened squeak, a single tear finding its way down her face. Houjun jumped to his feet and shoved the doctor out of his way, taking hold of Hana's hands and staring anxiously into her green eyes.
"Oh it's you…" the nurse breathed in relief. "I thought it might be…" The young woman cut herself off as she caught sight of Dr. Johnston getting to his feet beside Houjun.
"Hana!" Dr. Johnston exclaimed, mistaking Hana's thankful sigh for one of fear "Get away from him! I don't want you getting hurt again!"
"What? Why…I-I don't understand…" the nurse stammered in complete bewilderment. "I'm not hurt…"
The doctor pulled Houjun away from Hana and got between the two, pulling his walkie-talkie from his pocket as he faced Hana. "Now, now you mustn't defend him. He's done something horrible and should pay for it."
"But doctor, I don't under-"Hana tried again. She was cut off once again by a warning look from her superior.
"I'm calling security, so don't you try anything." The statement was directed at Houjun, who was desperately trying to get a good look at Hana to see if she was alright.
"Hello? Max? Yes, this Sam Johnston, I need security in room 304. We have a patient here who feels he can assault our nurses just because he's stronger than they are."
At these words, Houjun's eyes widened and he whirled around just as Hana sprang to her feet, a look of outrage on her face.
"What the hell are you talking about?!" she cried, anger starting to get the better of her "Houjun did no such thing!"
"Then explain your tears!" the doctor retorted. "Explain to me why I came in here to find you in Houjun's bed looking as if you'd been to the gates of hell and back!"
Hana hesitated, her anger starting to fade as memories of the previous night surfaced in her mind. "I-I can't…" she said at last. "But I do know that anything I might have felt or been through was not because of Houjun!" she added firmly. "If anything, he took care of me."
Dr. Johnston narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "Is this true?" he asked Houjun.
The young man in question nodded solemnly, mahogany eyes filled with something close to apprehension and anger.
"I see. So I am to take the word of a murderer and a headstrong young woman who is blinded by her own naiveté?" the doctor demanded.
Hana looked sharply at Houjun "What does he mean, murderer?" she asked uncertainly. "He can't mean you…"
Houjun looked helplessly at the nurse, unable to offer a defense as he was still unwilling to talk when he knew someone was listening.
"You see? He doesn't deny it because he knows I speak the truth." Dr. Johnston went on; ignoring the warning glance Houjun shot him. "He knows what he did to his best friend."
In a deceptively calm manner, Houjun handed his notebook to Hana and took a step forward, a dangerous glint in his eye.
"That's right Houjun, why don't you kill me as well?" the older man taunted "It's what you do to everyone else who doesn't bend to your will…"
Houjun started forwards but Hana took his arm. "Don't." she said grimly "He wants you to hit him, don't fall into his little mind games."
"Hana's right. We wouldn't want you to get upset now would we?" A self-satisfied look crossed Dr. Johnston's face. "Because then she might see your true self. She might have to watch as you take yet another life."
Houjun's eyes went flat and he started shaking with rage. Hana could feel the young man's muscles jumping with tension underneath her hands and she squeezed his arm reassuringly. "He's just a bitter old man." she told Houjun "A bitter old liar. Don't sink to his level."
"Am I really lying though?" the doctor asked casually. "Do you know why he was brought here to begin with? Didn't he tell you why he's such a lost cause?"
"He is not a lost cause!" Hana yelled her fury almost matching Houjun's now "He's not hopeless and he's not a murderer! You just hate him because he won't let you near him! You just want to make him miserable because you can't get the credit for helping him!"
"Ignorant." the man said scornfully "He is a homicidal maniac. That's why he's here!" Again the doctor ignored the warning look in Houjun's eyes as he went recklessly on, forgetting both the hospital's rules and the confidentiality rules of his practice. "He threw his best friend out of a sixteenth story window because of a stupid argument over a girl! He couldn't stand the loss, so he went after the man with a knife…he lost his nerve at the last second though and he dropped the knife and threw the man out a window instead."
Houjun's eyes were sparking by now, his face contorted in seething anger and it was a struggle for Hana to hold the much bigger young man back.
Still the doctor wasn't satisfied. "Wait, there's more." he said with grim satisfaction "After he did the deed, he decided to take the coward's way out and nearly killed himself. He was brought in with slashes all up his arms and legs, even a nice cut across the back of his head…That's how gentle and perfect your precious patient is! He's a delusional, psychotic sociopath!"
That did it. Houjun wrenched himself out of Hana's arms and tackled the doctor, throwing the older man to the floor and driving his fists into every available part of the other man's body.
"Houjun! Stop it!" Hana cried, desperately pulling the youth off the doctor and trying to hold him back. "Get hold of yourself!"
"You see?" the doctor laughed scornfully, pulling himself to his feet. He looked at Houjun, watching as the young man fought to free himself again and shook his head in disgust. "I was right. This is his true nature, not the gentle lost soul he pretends to be! Why else would he react like this?"
Houjun managed to throw Hana off of him at last and the nurse fell to the floor with a cry of pain. Deafened by his overwhelming anger, Houjun paid her no mind and grabbed Dr. Johnston by his shirt collar, slamming him into the wall. He put his hands around the man's throat and started squeezing.
"Stop it!" Hana yelled again as she flew at the young man, frantically trying to stop Houjun from doing something he would regret for the rest of his life. She looped her arms under Houjun's, effectively immobilizing the young man's arms and allowing Dr. Johnston to slip out of Houjun's grasp, then pulled the youth backwards as hard as she could. They both went crashing to the floor and Houjun's elbow flew out of nowhere to land a right hook to Hana's jaw just as security burst into the room.
"Max! Get in 'ere fast," yelled a blond haired man of about thirty "He's tryin' to kill the nurse or somethin'!"
The man named Max came rushing in and the two young men jumped on Houjun, pulling the struggling young man off of Hana and held him back as a third guard came in and quickly started assembling a needle. The cold metal gleamed in the sunlight and suddenly Houjun stopped struggling, the anger draining from his eyes to be replaced with cold fear as his face went deathly pale. Tears sprang to his eyes as he once again started pulling at the young men holding him, this time in desperation rather than rage.
"Better give him a double dose." Dr. Johnston told the third man as he gingerly massaged his neck.
The guard nodded and opened up a second bottle of serum.
"Hurry up, Tom!" the blond man said from between clenched teeth "He's strong!"
Tom nodded and injected the sedative into the needle. "Keep him steady now." he warned as he approached with the shot.
A sob escaped Houjun and he threw his weight against the men, his mind starting to go blank with fear, frantic to free himself from their iron hold on him In the end though, it was no use, Max and the other man were too strong for him so he did the only thing he could think of; he dodged Tom and the needle, nearly dragging his two captors with him, and reached out his one free arm. "Hana!" he cried in desperation, panicked tears cascading down his face as he pulled at the solid arms that held him "Hana, tasukete!"
The nurse, who had been sitting on the floor dazedly holding her jaw, came sharply back to reality as the cry reached her ears. She pushed herself to her feet and threw herself at the two guards, putting her own body between Houjun and Tom's needle. "Leave him alone!" she ordered "Let go of him, can't you see he's about to go into shock?!"
All of a sudden, Hana was pulled backwards and Dr. Johnston's smug tones were telling her to let the guards do their jobs. "I've waited two long years for an opportunity like this, you will not take it away from me!" he growled in her ear.
"Let me go!" Hana yelled, throwing the doctor off of her and sending him speeding towards the concrete floor where he landed with an ear-splitting crash. "I will not let you hurt him!" she seethed "He's my responsibility and no one is going to hurt him as long as I'm still alive to stop them!"
She jumped the man with the needle just as he was about to stick Houjun with it and pinned his arms behind his back. "Now let him go or I'll break his arms!" she shouted, her voice dangerous as she glared at the blond guard.
The guard turned to his accomplice. "What do we do?" he asked fearfully.
"Let him go, we got no choice." Max told him.
The two released Houjun and the young man fell to his knees, unable to stand under his own power. Hana was by his side in an instant. "Houjun! Houjun, look at me sweetheart, show me you're okay…" The nurse took the youth's face in her hands and looked into his unfocused mahogany eyes. "Damnit!" she swore "He's about to black out!" She turned to the guards again as she gently put her arm around Houjun's shoulder and held him upright. "I need a wet cloth and a paper bag, yesterday!" she ordered Max. "And, you two," she said turning to the blond guard and Tom. "Get him to the nurse's station so they can patch him up." She nodded towards Dr. Johnston's still form "I think I threw him too hard."
All three nodded and did as they were told.
Turning her full attention back to Houjun, Hana started shaking his shoulders. "Wake up! Come on sweetie, you've got to wake up!" she pleaded, gently hitting the young man's cheek with her other hand. "Please, you have to stay awake! Come on…"
It took almost five minutes, but the young man's eyes slowly began to focus and his entire body started to tremble violently, his breath coming in short sobbing, gasps. He turned wide eyes on Hana and the nurse gave him a quick, reassuring smile before she put her arms under Houjun's and, holding the youth upright with her shoulders and upper arms, carefully put her hands over Houjun's nose and mouth.
"Work with me Houjun, you have to try and breath to my counts, alright?" the young woman told him, giving the young man's shoulder a soft jolt with her elbows. "One…two…in...out…That's it, keep it up now." she coached him, keeping a firm hold on the young man so he wouldn't fall over. "One… two…in...out"
Houjun tried to do as Hana said but with each passing second it was getting harder and harder to focus, his already battered mind weakened from lack of air. His breathing was just starting to get back to normal when he felt a sudden wave of dizziness sweep over him. His head dropped forward and he went limp in Hana's arms as he fought not to throw up.
Hana's hands left Houjun's face and a cool, damp cloth was pressed to the back of his neck. Strong arms kept him from falling forwards onto his face and the young man could make out faint voices saying something.
"…won't be able to stay awake…" one was saying –he thought this voice was Hana's but he couldn't tell for the fog in his brain impeding his thought process.
"Anythin' I c'n do?" A new voice this time, male and completely unfamiliar to Houjun.
"Not now, but st…."
And then the world danced before his eyes and Houjun felt himself falling… falling into the darkness and he knew no more.
A/n: And so it ends for now because it is cold and I can't feel my fingers. Hopefully this isn't too crappy a chapter, considering I don't know anything about people falling unconscious or how a mental hospital works (hell I don't know a lot of things that went on in this chappy, but oh well) and it has also not been edited very well -.-(). Hopefully length made up for really long absence and next chapter WILL be better, I swear! We (we is me and the flea in my pocket, case you're wondering (that's not my line btw, it from white stones by roku-chan and I used it without permission. Go read it if you haven't already! It's worth it I swear!)) have a dictionary below and see y'all next time.
Glossary:
Anata wa anzen ima- you're safe now (badly translated tho, so probably not grammatically correct)
Daijobu-it's okay
Tasukete!-help!
There you go. Later days
~Tenshi Kitsune~