May
Justin
So I got back from Mexico on May first and it had been so great. I mean, Daph and I had this incredible time but as soon as we got off the plane and saw Brian waiting at the International Arrivals area I knew that he'd been working his ass off and not sleeping or eating enough.
Shit, he looked so damn happy to see me—in his Brian way, of course—he hugged me and kissed me right in the fucking airport and it was funny because there were these two middle aged women who had been standing near him waiting for someone. I guess they had been telling each other how handsome he is or something and then Daph and I came over to him and he squeezed her shoulder and kissed the top of her head and then really kissed me.
The two women just sort of shrugged and smiled like "Oh, well." You know what, though? They seemed to look happy that we were so happy.
It was kind of nice.
We got about twenty feet down the corridor on the way to the car and he stopped and just sort if picked me up in this big bear hug and kissed me again, I mean really kissed me like we were at the prom again and it was that same kiss with people watching and we didn't fucking care.
But, Jesus, Brian—he had these circles under his eyes like he hadn't had a full night's sleep since I left and I wasn't sure, but I think he might have lost weight.
Anyway, we dropped Daphne off at her place and when we got back to the loft it was like around ten at night. I'd been telling him all about the trip, the restaurants and the beach and scuba diving and the kids we met and he'd been listening but not saying much.
He asked me if I wanted something to eat or anything and then said that what he'd really like would be a shower and maybe just hang together.
Shit.
Saturday night and Brian wants a shower and bed? Fuck me; he must have been barely walking.
So we took the shower and he did me, but it was like he was only doing it because he thought that I'd expect it or something. That sounded shitty. It's not what I really mean, he wanted me, I know that, just like I wanted him, but he was so fucking tired that I think he really would have rather just crawled into bed and slept til Monday.
So after the shower I went to start unpacking my bag, mostly because I wanted to give him the presents I'd gotten him and he just said not to worry about it, that it could wait til morning.
Well, that was OK, so I started yawning and saying that it had been a really busy day and we'd hardly slept the night before, so would he mind if I just sort of hit the sack?
He made a face like I was a complete twat and said something about how he would think that at my age I could keep up with the nightlife, but he didn't fight it too hard and we just went to bed at like eleven. Maybe it was even a little before.
Jesus, he didn't even frigging move until like noon the next day.
We had dinner at Deb's that night, the usual family were there and, shit, he almost fell asleep again right in the ziti. Everyone made jokes about how I was wearing him out, but—shit, you know?
He can't keep this up—oh shut up, but he really can't. He'll burn out or have a heart attack like one of my father's executives a couple of years ago or he'll, I don't know, but when there's that much pressure something has to give.
It has to.
Shit.
He said that we'd talk about him working a little less, but every time I try to bring it up he changes the subject or just won't engage. Goddamnit.
I know he's type A and a workaholic and all that shit, but fuck. He's becoming frigging obsessed and it's like I can hardly get through to him anymore about it. It's almost like when he stopped tricking—and yeah, I believe him when he told me he'd stopped—it's like he had to find something else to replace it with.
It's like I'm not enough for him or he wants to put different walls up or some shit like that.
Shit.
Jennifer
Justin had been home for about a week when he and Brian agreed to come over for lunch. Justin had bough presents for me and Molly—though nothing for Craig, which I found petty and hurtful—and I was dying to see him. I know he's all grown up, or thinks he is, but he'll always be my sweet blonde baby even though he's in his twenties and married and a college student. I've worried about him for two decades, I don't think anything could make me stop now.
The problem is that now I have someone else to worry about, too.
Brian.
I know that for a long time I couldn't stand him and I certainly blamed him for almost everything, but as I got to know him a little better—not that there aren't things about him that make my skin crawl—I see that he had a rather large good side and I know he and Justin love each other.
For better or worst, he's part of the family, at least for a while.
Justin had brought us Mexican wedding dresses, bright and colorful and charming. Well, I may never wear something like that, but they are lovely, in their way. Molly went up to try hers on immediately.
We all oohed and aahed when she came down the stairs, but it was obvious that the only one whose opinion she cared about was Brian's. I don't know that she'll ever get over the crush she's developed on him and I'm simply glad that he's kind to her about it.
He really can be sweet when he makes an effort, kissing her cheek and whispering something that made her blush and giggle. It wouldn't surprise me it she ended up with a straight version of him someday.
Molly pulled Justin's arm to make him go see some graphics she'd been learning on the computer, so Brian and I were alone in the kitchen for a little while.
He's normally such a beautiful man that to see him tired and drawn was almost a shock. It's just something I guess I never thought I'd see. My mother had been on the phone about him a few days ago and she told me that he'd dropped in and that, though glad to see him, they were concerned. I gather that he was pretty exhausted when he was there, too.
"Was Justin upset that you couldn't go away with him?"
"He was a little disappointed, but he understands that I can't always take off when I'd like to."
"Do you think you might be able to go with him next time?"
He shrugged slightly. "I'm not sure. It would depend when." He took a drink of his beer considering whether or not to continue. "Right now the agency is trying to expand the client base, branch out to some of the larger markets, but between not being one of the really high profile companies and the economy sucking, it's not easy."
"So as a partner, you have to knock on doors to try to impress them."
"Pretty much."
Yes, Brian would be the one to have to make the calls. Just having him walk into your office, all Armanied and slick and smart and handsome and tall would impress anyone. Of course Vance was having him do it. When you combined Brian's personal package with whatever he would bring with him in his briefcase, he would get anyone's attention.
Justin and Molly were back. "Hey, Brian? Molly's class is going rafting on the Monongahela on Tuesday. I told her that I'd help as a chaperone. Could you come, too? The water is so fucking high this year, it'll be awesome."
"I have to go to Phoenix on Tuesday."
"Since fucking when?"
"Since Vance called this morning."
"...And when the fuck were you going to tell me?"
The two of them glared at one another for a few seconds before Brian switched his attention to Molly. "I'll go next time. OK? I promise." She just nodded at him. He was still her hero, but she had obviously wanted to show him off to her friends. He saw the look. "What time?"
All hope not lost, she looked at him. "The buses leave the school at seven thirty and we're supposed to get back at seven at night."
He took his phone out of his pocket, dialed. "Cynthia? What time is that meeting with the people in Arizona?...Alright. See if they can change it to Wednesday, anytime that's good for them. Then get me on a flight later Tuesday night—after nine...No, something came up, that's all...Tell Vance that I won't be in Tuesday and I won't have my phone with me...Call me if there's a problem. Thanks."
I have to admit it, there are times I want to wring his neck, but seeing the looks on both of my kid's faces, Brian is a better man than he lets on.
Justin
I couldn't believe it when Brian changed that meeting so he could go on Molly's class trip. Shit.
If she practically worshiped the ground he walks on before, she probably thinks he walks on water now.
So, Tuesday morning we had to get up at six to wake up and get dressed and get our asses out to the school in time to get on the bus. There were like a hundred twelve year olds and some yuppie parents and some teachers and me and Brian.
I couldn't believe the look on Molly's face when we parked the car and walked over to her and her friends. Ten teenyboppers all giggling at the sight of Brian in his jeans and a black tee. He honestly wasn't trying to look hot or anything, but shit—this is Brian we're talking about. He looks hot when he's unconscious for fuck's sake. He just smiled and kissed Molly on the cheek and said "Hi, Sis", which turned her bright red.
The principal came over—I remember her from when I was a student there, Dr. Adams, a real bitch—and introduced herself to Brian and lied through her teeth about what a great kid I'd been when I was there. She was giving Brian the once over, too. Like he cared. She even made some bullshit small talk about how it was nice that a family friend would help the children like this.
Brian just said it was no problem, what with Molly being family and all. Oh, was he our uncle or something? No, he was her brother-in-law. Gosh, Dr. Adams hadn't realized that I had a married older sister. That's when Brian told her that we're married.
I thought she'd swallow her teeth, homophobic cunt.
Just about then the woman who had the chaperone assignments came over to hand us the lists of kids we'd be watching. Molly and all of her friends were with Brian. I got the class geeks/nerds/losers. I almost kicked Brian's ass when he gave me one of his smirks.
Asshole.
So the bus ride was mostly fine. My group was either reading or playing Gameboy and completely ignoring me and everyone else on the planet, including each other. Hell, at least they were quiet.
Brian's group were laughing and flirting with him, Molly right in the seat next to him.
I was watching the other kids on the bus and it was pretty fucking funny. The girls were all in love, that was petty obvious, but it was the boys I really liked watching—no, not like that. I mean, they were watching Brian to see how he did it.
OK, he had decided to make it good for Molly, so he was talking and joking with his group of little girls. He was watching his language except when he'd slip in an occasional 'fuck' or something and then they'd all giggle. Right, like he wasn't doing that on purpose.
The boys, though—they were the ones who were watching to see if they could spot his tricks. There was the confidence, of course, but they were also checking what he was wearing and I'd be willing to bet that the next day about half of the boys would be wearing old Levi's and black tees and would be getting their hair cut like his.
So we get to the launch site and the rafts were waiting for us. The water was pretty cold since it was still spring and it was running pretty damn high. We were offered the rental of wetsuits, but I think the school decided that would add too much onto the cost of the trip, so we did without. It was a warm day, so even if someone did get wet (like duh, of course they were going to get fucking soaked) they'd dry off fairly quickly. Or that was the hope. Of course if someone went in, they'd be a while before they stopped sloshing.
They pushed off, twelve to a raft, ten kids, a guide and a chaperone and it was a Hell of a ride, let me tell you. There were some small rapids and there were places where we were just drifting and it was incredibly beautiful then there'd be another set of white water and things would get exciting again. The kids were shouting back and forth and they were even doing some singing and the expected splashing and stuff, just having a good time. Around twelve thirty the rafts pulled up onto a bank for a cookout lunch that was waiting for us and Brian had his handmaidens to wait on him. Shit—I'm just starting to call things like that Brian Kinney moments. It's just so him.
The girls were falling all over themselves to get him anything in the world and I was wondering if they knew he's gay, so I pulled Mol aside and asked her.
"God, of course they do. They just think he's gorgeous."
"What do they think of me?"
"God, Justin, you're my brother." I know, I'm a fucking idiot.
So we finished our lunch and got back into the rafts. The guides had told us that there some strong rapids in about a mile and to be careful.
Well, OK, I'll make a long story short. The raids were really rough. The guides said something about the amount of snow we'd had last winter and that there was a lot of runoff.
One of Brian's kids went over the side. I caught a glimpse of him making a lunge for her and it looked like the raft jolted then—I guess it hit a rock—and he went over the side too.
Jesus.
I think I yelled his name, but my raft was in the same current then and there wasn't anything I could do but keep an eye on my kids.
At the end of the whitewater I was so fucking scared. Brian's raft had pulled over to the shore and I could see a lot of scrambling around and all the guides knew that someone had gone over so they were all searching the water.
Christ.
The rest of the rafts pulled over and a couple of Brian's girls were crying. I was scared shitless. The guides, some of them, had gotten out of the boats to search the shore and finally, fucking finally, radio word came in that they were OK about two hundred yards up the stream.
Molly caught my eye and she gave me this big smile.
Finally fifteen minutes later they showed up and the guides pulled some old sweats out of a chest that was in one of the rafts, handed them to the two of them and showed them some bushes they could get dry clothes on in privacy.
Fuck it, I didn't care. I jumped out of the fucking raft and ran over to where Brian was changing. One of the guides was asking him if he was hurt or anything, but he was fine—just cold, wet and shaken up.
Screw the heteros. I hugged him and kissed him and probably would have channeled Emmett with tears and everything, but he kissed me and just whispered not to have a twat moment, he was fine, I should grow some balls for Chrissake.
I had to hug him again to make sure he was really OK, then we went back to the rafts. It was starting to get late and they were still the only ride home.
The rest of the trip was pretty subdued. Cindy, the girl who fell out was fine. Her ankle had a slight sprain, but it wasn't serious. She'd be fine.
The story came out on the bus ride back.
She'd lost her balance when they'd hit the big rapid and, like we saw, Brian tried to grab her but got knocked out of the raft, too.
He had tried to find her. The rafts had passed them by and were going too fast to even think about trying to catch up with. He said that he looked around for her but that he couldn't see her. Then he thought—Jesus!—that she might have been held under by the force of the water, so he started looking and saw her shirt underwater—it was screaming bright yellow—he somehow swam under to where she was trapped by the force of the water coming over the rocks. He'd managed to get a hand around her arm, pulled her away and got her to shore.
I have no fucking idea why she didn't drown, but she didn't.
You know how on school trips the kids would always sit in the same seats going and coming home? This is the first trip I'd seen where people actually moved. I went up so that I was directly behind Brian with Mol next to me and Brian was sitting the entire trip with his arms around Cindy and rubbing her back while her friends told anyone who'd listen for the twentieth time that he'd saved her life.
When we got back to the school, as soon as they heard what had happened, Cindy's parents wanted to take Brian out to dinner right then and there to thank him, but he said that he had to catch a flight, thanks anyway. Oh, what do you do? A partner at Vanguard? Good for you.
Brian really hates the kind of scene in that parking lot. You know, everyone making a big deal over him, especially people he doesn't know, especially a bunch of heteros. He still's a complete heterophobe and he was itching to get away.
We got back to the loft and all I wanted to do, and I think all Brian wanted to do, too, was to get something to eat, grab a shower, make love then sleep into next week. Instead he changed his clothes, got his bag and I took him to the airport.
He'd be back in two days.
Shit.
The next day there was a delivery at the door when I got home from class. Cindy's parents had sent a case of Moet champagne with a card on top. I opened it. It was a gift certificate to Le Pommier along with a letter from both of them. It was heartfelt, thanking him for saving their daughter and promising to call him when he returned from his trip. They added that Cindy had talked about nothing but him and they were just grateful he'd been along.
And the damn reporters were calling, too. They heard about what had happened and would like to interview him. Sorry, he's out of town. I saw the report anyway that night on the local station. Cindy was there with her parents, singing his praises and vowing to make it up to him.
Christ, Brian would have a fit.
Brian
I can't fucking believe it. I actually take a day off and I end up in the frigging newspapers.
Vance made one of his casual appearances in my office, asked me how my day off had been and segued to the Arizona trip.
I told him it had been fine, that we likely would get the account since I'd seen the paste ups from some other agency on an easel and they were for shit.
He said 'good' or something noncommittal like that. As he left he did add that he was glad that this time the coverage about me was positive, at least.
What the fuck was he talking about this time?
Cynthia had a clipping ready when I asked.
Shit.
That's it. I'm taking a fucking week off. Justin and I, we're fucking out of here.
There was one good thing that came out of all this bullshit, though.
I flew back home two days later, Thursday. I'd taken an early flight from Phoenix and gone straight to the office to check in and see what new fires needed dousing, cause God knows there's always something sliding off the stove onto the floor. A conference call from the heads of both Bethlehem and US Steel came in for me about five minutes after I sat down. They were talking about a merger and wanted me to come over for a meeting with the CEO's and company presidents to discuss taking them on as clients, to help them compete internationally.
Oh yeah. The CEO for US Steel was Cindy's father.
Debbie
So I saw Sunshine and Brian walk in for breakfast and I was going to say something about that article in the paper about Brian saving that little girl when I caught the look on Justin's face. You know, when he gets that sort look of panic and I know that if I open my mouth the Asshole, excuse me, Brian will tear out my tonsils.
So, OK, I know when to keep my mouth shut.
The two of them sat down and I just had to say it.
"Brian. You look like shit."
He gave me one of his, 'I don't give a fuck what you say' looks, but I'd seen that look back when he was still perfecting it so I just went on.
"You need to go home and sleep and you should think about taking a nice long vacation—with your husband for a change." He pretended to read the menu. "You listen to me, asshole, because you look like you're about to fall on your face and I sure as Hell don't want to have to deal with all the drama queens around here if you drop dead. You hear me?"
"Black coffee and half a grapefruit. We're going away next month for two weeks, so get off my fucking back."