Chapter 20 - An Angel
There I was; one slip and I lose everything.
My Life.
My Baby, and the man I was in love with.
One fucked up guy can take so much away with just a flick of the wrist. I then thought of... everything:
Meeting Faith that one sunny afternoon at college, which we both eventually dropped out of.
Meeting a man who ended up abusing me and when Faith put him in a coma.
Getting a wonderful job at a very nice restaurant.
The fateful day walking down the street to see Faith kill a man.
Being dragged away.
Meeting Spike who at first sight thought I was innocent.
Coming here and meeting Glory, Darla, Kendra and Cordelia.
Kendra killing herself
When I lunged at Cordelia after she saw Spike and I kissing.
Angel trying to rape me and then Spike rescuing me.
Cordelia coming to me with information that changed everything.
Losing the notebook that stayed underneath my bed.
Having sex with Spike for the first time.
People dying... a lot of people dying.
Faith giving me a pregnancy test.
Watching the pregnancy test form two lines instead of one.
Spike loving me.
Me loving him.
To go through all of this just to have it all taken away by this bastard. My stomach flopped and turned at the suspense of the moment.
As the situation had started to become known to everyone, the room started to fill with more and more people. I could tell it was making Andrew more nervous because his hand was shaking so hard I could feel the blade graze along the front of my neck. The moment Spike came in, his eyes widened. I instantly could tell he was going to end up blaming himself. Someone could burn to death in a factory explosion in China and Spike would find someway to blame himself. Our eyes connected for a brief moment and I saw anger and panic in his blue eyes. Andrew's mask had come off the minute he had fallen to the ground and he was now known to the world.
Everybody in the room was trying to convince Andrew to let me go. "Andrew, let go of Buffy." Cordelia encouraged. Spike however was still in a state of shock.
"No." He said firmly, I felt him pull me back a little. I tried to cooperate so the blade wouldn't feel so rough against my skin
"Why?" Spike choked out but no one noticed how much it was affecting him save me, Glory and Darla.
Andrew seemed taken back by this question, as if he thought everybody was already supposed to know the answer. "Why? Why? Because of her!" He said obviously referring to me. I felt the blade of the knife press further into my throat. "She was about to fuck up everything! She tried to lock up someone so beautiful as Angel! She has no right. As a monthly check I was ordered to look around the girls' room to look for weapons. I looked under her bed and found the notebook. It had a list of girl's she had as witnesses. She even had a plan about how they were going to lock up that beauty of a man. I had to get rid of anyone or anything that could put him away, even if it meant me." At those words Angel walked into the room.
"What the hell?" Angel asked as he took in the situation in front of him.
"They tried to lock you up." Andrew said hoping to win over the affection of Angel.
Angel sighed. "Andrew, I already told you. It was only one time and it was a mistake. We were both kind of drunk. I told you that it was a one-time deal. What are you trying to prove here?"
"That I love you more then these whores ever will."
"Andrew let go of Buffy." Angel said starting to come towards us. Andrew moved back as he approached.
"Andrew. I will never love you and I never will; this is pointless." Angel said angrily as he realized this was useless.
"Fine!" Andrew yelled. He brought his hand back up as he prepared to run the blade right across the front of my neck.
Right as he moved his hand, I knew that everything was gone. Love was now out of reach for Spike, the baby, and me. I was going to die and it really was my fault. My eyes locked with Spike's for a brief second. I was apologizing though my eyes and I hoped he got the message. Right before the blade moved I heard a gunshot. I opened my eyes to see Angel with a gun in his hand pointed at Andrew. Andrew started to fall back moving the blade with him. Before I knew what happened I was pulled into Spike's arms. He had pulled me safely away from what I thought was my fate.
The police took all statements from everyone who had witnessed the situation and they took Angel and Andrew away. Eventually, everyone started to leave me alone. They all felt sorry for me but when I told them that I needed to sleep, they all understood. The minute I felt the coast was clear I slipped my way into Spike's room. I found him laying there, just looking at me. I walked over to the bed where he lay and when slipped into bed with him he wrapped his arms protectively around me. I wasn't facing him but the door I had just come through. I could feel the back of my shirt becoming wet. Spike was crying.
"I almost lost you." He said with his hand over my stomach.
I felt my own tears start to build at the sound of his voice. I had to show him that he couldn't have prevented it and that it wasn't his fault. I turned around to face him. I kissed his neck, then his collarbone and drifted further down his bare stomach until I reached his pants. When I unzipped them, he looked up
"No. Not after what happened."
"I want to show you something." He lay back so I could continue. I pulled him free of his pants then quickly proceeded to pull off my own as well. He knew what I was about to tell him but I think he just needed to hear it. I pulled my panties off before sliding down on him until his hardness filled me completely. We both moaned at the contact.
"I was supposed to protect you," he told me as he lay there wallowing in his own guilt. I started the fiction as I moved up and down. I grabbed his hands and moved them to my face.
"I'm still here. We're still here." I said as moved his hands down to my stomach. "You didn't lose me. I'm not leaving you in any way, shape, or form. I love you and I'm still here; still with you and still on the earth." I moved his hands over my body to emphasize my point. "I'm not a ghost or an illusion. I'm with you till the day you die whether you like it or not." With that Spike let a smile slip. I then moved his hands to the sides of my face again. "You will never lose me. I swear to god you will never have to be in the situation we were in earlier. I promise."
I
You're a song
Written by the hands of God
Don't get me wrong 'cause
This might sound to you a bit odd
But you own the place
Where all my thoughts go hiding
Right under your clothes
Is where I'll find them
Underneath your clothes
There's an endless story
There's the man I chose
There's my territory
And all the things, I deserve
For being such a good girl honey.
'Cause of you
I forgot the smart ways to lie
Because of you
I'm running out of reasons to cry
When the friends are gone
When the party's over
We will still belong to each other
Underneath your clothes
There's an endless story
There's the man I chose
There's my territory
And all the things I deserve
For being such a good girl honey
Underneath your clothes
There's an endless story
There's the man I chose
That's my territory
And all the things I deserve
For being such a good girl
For being such a hey,hey,hey,hey
I love you more than all that's on the planet
Movin' talkin' walkin' breathing,
You know it's true
Oh baby it's so funny
You almost don't believe it
As every voice is hanging from the silence
lamps are hanging from the ceiling,
Like a lady tied to her manners
I'm tied up to this feeling.
Underneath your clothes
There's an endless story
There's the man I chose
That's my territory
And all the things I deserve
For being such a good girl honey.
Underneath your clothes, Ah wha ho oh woah!
There's the man I chose
That's my territory
And all the things I deserve
For being such a good girl
For being such a good girl.
/i
Authors note - Like it? Dedicated to Buffy Williams, Kaitlynn, James
Lee, Spike's Lover, VamptasitcA and Angela