Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own a damn thing. Not the characters, or the song. (The song is "Lovesong" by the Cure, by the way)
What the hell happened?
I breathed in deep, trying to calm myself, and decided to walk myself through what had happened the night before...
...........
I was sitting at the bar down the road from my house, as usual, when Jecht, Braska, and their wives walked in the door. They grinned at each other when they saw me, then made their way through the busy room to me.
"You're almost worse than me, buddy," Jecht teased.
I grunted. Obviously, he just didn't understand my dilema.
Braska gave him a look and instantly hushed him. Then, he put his hand on my shoulder and turned to me. "Really Auron, what's the matter? I don't believe I've ever seen you like this."
"Nothing is the matter, my lord." I turned back towards the bar and took another gulp of my drink. Maybe, just maybe, if I get drunk enough tonight, I thought, I'll finally forget her...
Braska's wife Jenae winced at my actions, then took a glance at the bar in front of me. There wasn't much there, eight empty glasses, and a napkin with some scribbled words to a song that I only sung in my head. "Auron, what's this?" she said as she picked up the napkin.
I tried to stop her from reading it, tried to snatch it back, but she was much too fast for me. "A song..." I mumbled.
She smiled slowly as she was reading it, almost as if she was amused. But, surprisingly, I didn't even care. I wasn't too worried about her reading it, it was the rest of them that I didn't want to see. I knew that Jenae would understand what I was feeling though.
"It's beautiful, Auron. Would you sing it for me?" She tried to hand me back the napkin, but I shook my head, motioning her to keep it. Then, as quietly as I possibly could, I started to sing it...
"Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am home again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am whole again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am young again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am fun again
However far away
I will always love you
However long I stay
I will always love you
Whatever words I say
I will always love you
I will always love you
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am free again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am clean again
However far away
I will always love you
However long I stay
I will always love you
Whatever words I say
I will always love you
I will always love you..."
The whole entire room was silent when I stopped. "Shit," I breathed. Figures that I would get the whole entire bar's attention just from singing a stupid song. I swallowed the rest of my drink and put my head between my hands.
Then, to my surprise, Braska started clapping. It was slow at first, but it snapped the rest of the people out of the daze they were in from the song, and they started clapping too. Pretty soon, the whole entire bar was thundering with applause.
"I thought I was singing it quietly," I mumbled as I motioned to the bartender to get me another drink.
Jecht laughed as he slapped me on the back. "Maybe at first, but by the end, you were screaming it, buddy."
"Tysh ed," I said, to Jenae's pleasure.
"That's right Auron, if you're going to swear, you better do it in Al Bhed."
"I'll try to keep that in mind," I nodded.
Jecht's wife, Rachelle, had been quiet for the whole conversation, but when the other three started talking among themselves, she slid up to me and whispered into my ear, "Who was that for?"
I paused for a moment, then said, "Rikku."
She smiled, "Yuna's guardian?"
"How else would I have met her?" I asked.
"Good point Auron, you are kind of a homebody when you're not drinking," she grinned.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," I smiled.
"Did you tell her how you felt?" My silence answered her question, so she moved on to the next one. "Do you want to?"
I looked at her like she was insane. "Tell her? How exactly am I supposed to tell her, Rachelle? Appear to her as a ghost in a dream, smile at her, say, "Rikku, I'm madly in love with you," and then disappear? She won't think it was real and nothing would have been accomplished. Nothing CAN be accomplished by this. So, I guess I'm just forced to be misrable for eternity, just because I had to go and do something stupid like falling in love." I finished off my speech by finishing off my tenth drink and putting my head on the cool, dirty bar.
"Always the pessimist," she smiled. "There are better ways than dreams to tell someone you love them."
"And how exactly could I do that, Rach?" I glanced at her from under my arms, and I could see that she was laughing at me. But instead of getting angry at her, I just sighed and listened.
"The song... what is it called?"
"Lovesong."
"Ah a simple name... good."
"What are you scheaming at?" I glared at her, but it didn't stop her smile in the sightest. I guess she was used to my drunken glares.
"Do you know how they write songs on Spira, Auron?"
"People get ideas and write them down, correct?"
Her eyes twinkled, and I knew I was in trouble. "Almost, but a good try. Very few songs are written by the people themselves. Most songs are written by us, the people in the Farplane, then given to them in visions or dreams. We're the peoples "muses", you could say."
"What are you trying to say, Rachelle?"
"When one writes a song on the Farplane, you can go to the Song Registry, pick a band that you wish to "write" it, and send it to them via dreams or however you wish for them to get the idea. After that, it's up to clever marketing and good live shows to get it to be famous," she grinned. "But, honestly, most songs written by us in the Farplane never do get popular, it's the original songs by the bands that get the most radio play."
"Well then what exactly is the point?"
"It's worth a try, isn't it?"
I rolled my eyes and stood up. "I'll think about it."