A/N – Kraven: I forgot about 'Dot Matrix' from Reboot. But I know it was the name of a character in 'Spaceballs'. So it's not terribly original either way. Specter: Yes, Allison remembers the crash, but she doesn't remember what caused it. I should have made that more clear. Everyone: this chapter has taken a little longer than usual to crank out. September has been crazy in Loon World – sorry guys!

Escape From Paradise

A "My Life as a Teenage Robot" Fanfic

Chapter Nine – The Hunt Begins

"Security check," chirped the wall speaker. "Please confirm identity via serial number …"

Smytus slammed his fist into the wall, ripped out a clawful of sputtering wires, and tossed them over his shoulder with a snarl. He didn't know why he had been summoned back to Stanley's lab; the message had only said for him to come immediately. He didn't take kindly to being ordered around by civilians. The lab doors swished open and he stomped inside, growling in a confrontational voice. "My identity is Smytus, Destroyer of Worlds – NOT Smytus, Errand Boy for Annoying Braniacs! What do you want now, scientist?!? Why do you waste my time?"

The lab was cloaked in darkness; the only light was that which trickled in from the hallway, sketching out rough outlines of bulky equipment and filling them in with a fuzzy patchwork of shadows. There was no response to his bellicose entrance, and Smytus wondered for a moment if the lab might be empty. But then he noticed a dark figure sitting in a high-backed chair, watching data flow over the flickering green screens above the lab's control panel. The warrior's mood grew downright poisonous. He dares to have me summoned to this subterranean rat-hole, and now that I'm here, he ignores me! "What's the matter, you puny little button-pusher?" he growled. "Do you have residue clogging up your auditory sensors?" Smytus marched up to the chair, whirled it around …

And recoiled in horror as Queen Vexus' cold, piercing eyes stared through him. "My sensors are in perfect condition, my dear commander," she smiled. "And Stanley didn't summon you here; I did. See, I decided to come down and check on XJ-9 myself. And, well, you can imagine my surprise."

He felt the turbopumps in his chest seize to a halt, and stumbled a few steps backwards, on the verge of going into system shutdown – then his sensors told him that there were still more robots present in the lab. A series of glowing red orbs flamed to life, encircling him like a pack of mechanical demons. Vexus made a gesture with her serpentine hand, and the room's lighting increased to full brightness – revealing the stunning destruction that had been wrought upon the lab. As the shadows melted away, the floating red orbs resolved themselves into twelve arrogant robotic faces – tall, lean, insectoid robots, painted jet-black with flecks of crimson trim. Vexus had brought a contingent of the dreaded Black Mantis robots with her. A visit from the queen's personal enforcers was never a good thing; for many a robot, those glowing red eyes were the last thing their sensors ever recorded. Smytus' neural processors raced with near-panic – how much do they know? Does the queen know I've been lying to her since yesterday?

"Your Majesty … wh-what happened here?" he managed to babble. His bewilderment was genuine; he had no idea of what had gone on in the lab earlier. "Was it … was it some kind of accident?"

"More like a struggle, commander," hissed Mantis-Five, his voice dripping with condescension. "We found the remains … ewghh …" – he pointed to a pile of gray sludge – "… of the scientist, and leftovers from two common roach-drones. But there's no trace of XJ-9 anywhere. In fact, there's no evidence that the scientist was even working on her. It's almost as if she was never even here at all."

Smytus forced a lump of hydraulic fluid to his jaws. "W-well, obviously … she must have escaped."

"Obviously," smiled Mantis-Eight. He had the air of a jungle cat indulging in a little play time with his next meal. "The only logical explanation is that XJ-9 overpowered the scientist, destroyed the lab, and somehow made a daring escape out of a high-security underground facility … all without anyone noticing a single thing." His eyes told Smytus, both of us know that's not what happened.

The commander tugged nervously at his chest-plate, and fluid coursed through his radiator loops, fighting to cool down his electronics. "Perhaps that blasted nano-droid – yes, that's it. The nano-droid must have attacked the scientist and helped XJ-9 escape! I told that stupid scientist not to fool around with nanobots, but would he listen to me? Noooo …"

"Forget the infernal nano-droid," growled Vexus. "XJ-9 is all that matters to me, and I am – very – upset to learn of her escape." She cupped her long, withered hands and stared into Smytus' face with a gaze that could've drilled a hole through a slab of titanium. "She must be found as soon as possible, using all of the resources at our disposal. I want my private guard, the Black Mantis, to lead the search efforts. You will report to Mantis-One, and co-operate with them in any way you can, commander. I assume you'll have no problem with those arrangements?"

"No, Your Majesty," sighed Smytus, accepting the implied demotion.

"Oh, and Smytus, if you find her, I just might decide not to review the past two days of video from the secret security cameras. You know, the ones that show what's really been going on in this lab."

"Y-y-yes, Your Majesty," he gulped, his claws visibly shaking.

The Cluster capital looked completely different from five thousand feet up; the commotion of street level was barely visible, and the frenzy of hovercar traffic shrank away into a swarm of tiny insects winding through a gargantuan metal maze. The fantastic skyscrapers which had seemed so imposing from the ground were dwarfed by Mile High Tower; out on the observation deck, they seemed like nothing more than a scattering of children's building blocks. A thin layer of light purple clouds rolled over the city a thousand feet below, and crept off to the south, where the civilian spaceport buzzed with activity. Domed hangars stood out clearly against the horizon, which from this altitude, displayed a noticeable curvature. Drew leaned against the railing, the incredible view filling him with a mix of elation and vertigo.

"You know, if you just lean over a bit, so the landscape fills your field of vision …" – he watched a large starship gently lift off, and speed away to parts unknown – "… it feels like you're flying."

Allison snuck a peek over the railing, and cringed with mock fear. "Lean over a few more inches," she laughed, "you will be flying, you gearhead … straight down!"

Drew smiled and flinched, pretending to slip, and a squeal escaped from Ally's voice recorder – then she realized he was only joking, and punched him in the arm. After a few more exchanges of laughter and horseplay, they turned their attention back to sightseeing. Or, that is, she did. Drew found himself unable to turn his eyes from the amazing robot girl beside him. Ally – sometime in the past few amazing hours, 'Allison' had turned into 'Ally' – had eagerly played tour guide on their walk through the city, and Drew had seen sights more amazing than anything that any human being had seen before. But every monument, statue, and sculpture paled in comparison to the sight of Ally's long violet hair flapping joyfully in the gusty breeze, like a river of mystery flowing behind her beautifully streamlined face, and her two dark, deep eyes, like a pair of infinitely deep pools that beckoned him to …

"Drew? You want to try a drink of my high-octane petro-frappe?"

"Wha?" He shook his head back to reality, trying desperately to regain his focus. "Ahhhh … no, but I'll take that can when you're done with it. Sorry about that, Ally, my mind kind of wandered for a second. The view up here kind of makes your mind spin."

"Mmmm, that's why I love to come up here," she grinned, looking out at the landscape that stretched on for hundreds of miles. "You can see that there's more to the universe than just the city. Sometimes I even come up here all by myself after dark, and watch the starships fly in and out. It's fun to try and imagine the amazing places they're going to. Sounds pretty pathetic, huh?"

"I guess we're both pretty pathetic, then," he chuckled, then turned back towards the south, and the landing pads of the spaceport. Somewhere in the haze of his mind, a tiny voice of reason shouted out like an army drill sergeant. Screw your head on straight, stupid! You and Jenny have to get the kids out of here and back to Earth! Now pay attention and keep your mind on the job! His eyes grew out of his head a few inches, like a pair of binoculars, and zoomed in on the spaceport, making x-ray scans of every starship he could see. Each carried hundreds of robots, and many of them were capable of high-speed flight through hyperspace; so in theory, they could easily carry all the students back to Earth. Sure, easy. Just like walking into an airport and stealing a jumbo jet. How in blazes am I supposed to do that?

Then Allison walked over next to him, and set her oil-drink down on the handrail. "So what's your home planet like, Drew?" she asked, unaware that she was interrupting his train of thought. "You haven't talked much about it. Jenny says it's 'out in the boonies', but they must have some pretty awesome technology there, to build an android like you."

He smiled at the implied compliment. "Well, it's nothing to get too excited about. Not compared to Cluster Prime, anyway. I mean, just look at where we're standing! I've never taken an elevator above the twenty-second floor in my entire life, and that was just for my grandma's condo."

"Come on," she giggled. "I bet it's a great place to be a robot."

He shook his head at her unintentional irony. "Oh, yeah … great place to be a robot." Crowds mocking me, people treating me like a monster … he stole a glance at her out of the corner of his eye … knowing I will never, ever meet anyone like you, no matter how long I live. "It's nice and all," he shrugged, "but believe me, Ally, nobody back home has ever seen anything like this place."

"Then you should send them a souvenir," she suggested helpfully.

He gave her a quizzical look, and she went on. "I mean, sure, you're probably taking some stuff back home with you after Festival, but you could always go buy something now, and ship it overnight. You know, like with Empire Express. 'When it's really gotta get there, really really fast …'"

A stroke of inspiration hit him, as Allison continued singing the catchy jingle. He turned his eyes back to the spaceport, and saw a plain white starship lift off from the cargo area. It was emblazoned with the Empire Express logo, and a quick scan revealed it was filled with cargo containers – and a crew of four. Drew grinned to himself. If they couldn't get themselves off of Cluster Prime as passengers, maybe they could do it as cargo. It would be super easy to overpower four Cluster robots …

A sudden gust of wind roared through the observation deck, strong enough that the robotic sightseers had to struggle to keep from being blown over. Drew and Ally braced themselves against the wide handrail – but Ally's can of petro-frappe was almost empty, and the wind snatched it into the air. She instinctively shot her arms out to catch it – grabbing the can just as a pair of silver-green arms stretched out to do the same. The wind died down as quickly as it had flared up, leaving two young robots awkwardly holding an oil can between them, with their metallic fingers blissfully intertwined. With a mix of astonishment and wondrous terror, Drew watched Ally's shiny, perfect cheeks paint themselves a bright lavender … then the oil can clattered to the floor of the platform, leaving him holding onto her smooth, slender hands …

And then a bolt of something shot through his network of nano-computers. Time froze for a microsecond, as a million amazing thoughts screamed through his mind. This can't be happening. I feel something – I actually feel something! But that's impossible! I don't have a sense of touch, or a nervous system! I haven't felt a thing since I became an android! But what the heck was that buzz I just felt –

Then he blinked a few times, chuckled awkwardly, and squeezed her hands a little tighter. "I don't suppose you would know where an out-of-towner like me could buy himself a cheesy souvenir?"

Allison swallowed hard, as the soft hum of her cooling motors rose in pitch, just a notch. "Well, there's all kinds of shops and booths set up downtown, at Festival Square. That's where the big opening night celebration is being held. And I think there's even an Empire Express close by," she giggled. She felt the pounding of her pumps deep inside of her chassis, and hopefully stared up into his silvery face. She'd never been to the opening night Festival celebration before, or the opening night dance. A glimmer of worry crossed her expressive eyes. Stupid, Allison, stupid. He just wants to mail something home. He probably has better things to do than lug a freak like me to a stupid dance …

But then he offered his green-striped arm to her, and the nervous young robot girl looped her arm around his, lacing their fingers together. They casually made their way towards the tower's express elevator, their optical sensors locked on each other in an amorous gaze. Drew cautiously reached up with his free hand and gently brushed a strip of shiny, purple hair-foil from Ally's warm, inviting eyes. "I hope there's a petro-café close by, too," he smiled. "I think I owe you, after dropping your drink." Somewhere deep inside his mind, that little voice of reason was growing smaller, and smaller, and smaller.

Even among the hustle and bustle of the capital's hectic shopping district, the disturbance turned the heads of dozens of robotic passers-by, as a chorus of angry shouts rang out from the lobby of the fashionable beauty parlor and day spa. The large crystalline doors of Bolt, Bath, and Beyond flew open, and a pair of haggard, disheveled roach-drones staggered out onto the sidewalk, with a horde of angry female robot customers furiously shaking their hands and claws after them. While the store manager apologized and tried to calm the ladies down, the red and green roach-drones stumbled away from the store, and made their way over to a wrought-iron public bench. With servos and joints squeaking loudly, they plopped their metallic carcasses down, and sagged with exhaustion.

The red drone glowered at his green partner. "Smooth move, Sheldon. Really smooth."

"Geez, Brad, how was I supposed to know it was the ladies' room?" protested the worn-out geek. "One door had a yellow gear on it, the other had a green one. What's that supposed to mean, huh? And I thought that big round thing was an oil tank. I didn't know it was a customer!"

Brad didn't have any more zingy comebacks for him. He wiped off his forehead and stared up at the unbelievably tall skyscrapers, and the dizzying air traffic that filled the late-afternoon sky, feeling more lost than he'd ever felt before in his life. The robot planet's capital was awe-inspiring, but it completely overwhelmed his senses – and it just stretched on and on and on forever. Every time he clanked his exo-suit around another corner, there was another building that was ten stories higher than the last one. He and Sheldon had been searching the city for hours now, and he didn't know if they'd even gone through one percent of it. Now they were focusing on the types of places that a teenage robot girl would probably go: malls, boutique stores, and most recently, beauty salons. But their search had proven fruitless so far, and Brad was beginning to lose hope that they'd ever see Jenny again. To his amazement, the prospect of losing Jenny troubled him more than the danger of becoming a Cluster slave.

But that was exactly why they had to press on, now more than ever. Not only to save their own skins, and the rest of the class – but to save the entire Earth from Cluster slavery. Brad had to make sure that Jenny found out about this "Cluster Dawn" thing he'd overheard Vexus talking about. The Cluster had made the occasional attempt to attack Earth in the past, but they were mostly obsessed with assimilating Jenny and rest of Earth's robots. Now it sounded like the gloves were coming off; the Cluster was going to launch a full-scale attack on Earth in only six days. Brad thought about the amazing power he'd just seen on display in the military parade. That was just one parade, in just one city, on just one planet of the mighty Cluster Empire. What chance did Earth have against that kind of force?

"Hey Mister Soldier, is something wrong with you?" said a young, tinny voice.

Brad glanced over to see that a young robot toddler had climbed up onto the bench next to him. He was proudly holding on to a cone of Clustard, and looking at him with an intense, interrogating stare. "It sounds like one of your air hoses is loose," he said. "Your insides are going all huff-huff-huff."

Brad let out a soft chuckle; for an instant, the annoying little robot reminded him of his own little brother back home on Earth. Maybe this little guy likes to play 'Army', just like Tuck. Then he realized what the little tyke was talking about – he was hearing Brad and Sheldon's labored breathing, as their lungs gasped for oxygen. Oh boy, gotta think of something fast. "Uhh, well, you see, little guy …"

Then Sheldon spoke up from inside of his green drone. "Not to worry, little citizen! We're just venting off excess pressure from our pneumatic systems. That helps a soldier keep his robotic muscles in tip-top shape, so he can fight off the bad guys!" Sheldon struck a comical pose with his drone's fists, delighting the little robot boy. Brad punched Sheldon's drone in the shoulder, giving him a big toothy grin. Way to think on your feet, Sheldon! Nicely done!

Fascinated by the two soldiers, as any little boy would be, the robot toddler reached over to offer up his cone of drippy desert to the green roach-drone. "Wanna bite, Mister Soldier?"

Sheldon was tired, and hungry, and thirsty, and the little cone of soft ice cream looked like a gift from the gods to his weary eyes. He opened a slot in the drone's mouth, and quickly snuck off a blob of Clustard with his finger. He licked his lips, stuck the Clustard in his mouth …

And spat it back out so hard that the top of his exo-suit flew completely off of his head. Clustard wasn't like milk-based ice cream; it was made out of oil, like all the other "food" on Cluster Prime. And Sheldon had just swallowed a mouthful of whipped, creamy, high-viscosity goodness. He released the controls of his exo-suit and rubbed his tongue on his hands, trying to flush out the horrible taste …

Then a shrill scream pierced the air, cutting through the chatter and clatter of busy robot pedestrians. The little robot boy jumped away from Sheldon, and pointed to his exposed fleshy face. "Human! Everyone, everyone look, a human! Look, he ate out the inside of that soldier and took him for a host! Wow, just like in the monster movies! Cool!"

The rest of the robots on the sidewalk did not think it was so cool. Their metallic jaws dropped in unison – and then they erupted into shrieks of terror, running and rolling in random directions, waving their arms in a frenzy. Robots ran into the middle of the street, bringing ground traffic to a screeching halt – they were that desperate to get away from the organic monsters. Robots rolled into the stores and slammed the doors shut, then deployed power tools from their bodies to bolt the doors shut. Robots clung to each other, shivering violently, frightened beyond the ability to move. Their cries filled the air: "Humans! Naked monkeys! Robot-eating monkeys on the loose! Oh, my Cog, run for your lives!"

Brad and Sheldon realized that they were in serious trouble now. They spilled out of their confining exo-suits, glad to be free of the metallic bodies, but feeling more exposed than ever. And to make things worse, the sight of two hollowed-out robots "bursting" with filthy, sweaty human parasites filled the crowd with an even greater level of hysteria. The boys collapsed against the bench, barely able to stand on their cramped and aching legs, and rushed to stretch out their knotted muscles.

"This doesn't make any sense," said Brad, shouting to be heard over the mob. "How could these robots think that humans are dangerous to them?"

Sheldon ducked behind his hands, shielding himself from a broom that a nervous robot storekeeper was swinging at his head. "Jeez, knock it off, mister!" he pleaded. "We're not trying to hurt you! We're just looking for our friends …"

"AIIIGHHH!" howled the storekeeper. "They talk! The hairless apes talk! They're monsters! Monsters!" He dropped his broom, his tires sent up a squeal of smoke, and he sped off down the sidewalk.

"They're not wearing collars!" screamed another robot. "The hairless apes could attack us at any minute!"

Brad staggered a few steps towards a trembling delivery-bot, and shouted out to him. "Look, please, we're not going to attack you!" The robot's bulb-eyes flickered with fear, and he turned to run away … but Brad grabbed onto his arm, desperate to prove he wasn't a threat. "Please, just listen to me for a second! My friend and I are lost, and scared, and we just want to …"

The robot yanked his arm free from Brad's grasp, with a look of disgust on his face. "Get your stinking paws off me, you darn dirty ape!" Then he sprinted off into the panicked crowd.

Chaos erupted in every direction that Brad and Sheldon ran. The boys scrambled down the sidewalk, glancing at the alleyways between the buildings – but they didn't want to trap themselves in a dead end, with no way to escape. There was no way for them to duck out of sight, for even as thousands of robots ran away from them in a screaming mob, hundreds more formed a loose perimeter around them, standing a few hundred feet away – fascinated at the opportunity to see two wild human beings prowling the streets of the big city. And there was a third group of robots, too; a scattering of brave citizens who decided to fight back against the freakish talking human monsters. Brad ducked as a piston rod sailed through the air, inches over his head. Sheldon sidestepped a large gear-piece, and the boys finally realized that they were being assaulted by a gang of robots who had broken the window of a spare parts shop, and were pelting them with mechanical projectiles. The boys shielded their heads, and sprinted across the street, hoping to put as much distance as possible between themselves and their robot assailants. But despite their efforts, their mere presence created a spectacle wherever they ran. And Brad could hear the shrill wail of approaching sirens, echoing through the metallic canyons of the busy city.

The young humans gurgled and babbled happily, and scampered around on their hands and knees, to the amusement and adoration of all the robots surrounding the enclosure. Even Dot was smitten with them, and her eyes lit up with glee when one of the toddlers got to his feet, and wrapped his little chubby fingers around her hand. Jenny was glad to see the baby humans so happy, but she still had to fight back feelings of horror and revulsion – after all, the babies were penned up in a glass cage, in a pet store!

"Look, Jenny, he's munching on my finger!" giggled Dot. "I can see why some robots adopt these funny little things. They're so ugly that they're kinda cute!"

"Sure, while they're little," said a young robot girl who worked in the pet store. Her finger swiveled open and deployed a rubber nipple, and one of the babies grabbed onto her hand to start feeding. "That's what everyone thinks at first, when they bring home a pet human. Then they get bigger, and wilder, and once the little monsters turn ten or so, they become uncontrollable, and everyone brings them back to get collared. A shame, but it's for the best, really."

"Yeah – sure – for the best." Jenny picked up one of the human babies, and chuckled at his pudgy red cheeks, with a sad smile on her metal face. What kind of life could one of these little guys expect to have here on Cluster Prime, doomed to be treated as an animal? It almost moved her to tears, but she couldn't bring herself to get mad at the robots around her. All of the robots she'd seen today, at the Royal Zoo, at the veterinarian's, even at the circus – they all treated humans like animals because they really did think that humans were just animals. Sure, some of the robots hated humans, but not in a cruel, sadistic way. Not in the way that Vexus and her army did. But how could so many robots be so wrong about humans? Or maybe a better question, Jenny thought to herself, was – how could so many robots be tricked into being so wrong about humans?

"Well, this was kind of … fun," chuckled Jenny, setting the baby back down in its cage. If by 'fun', you mean 'nightmarish'. She folded her arms with a deep sigh, and scratched off another entry from her memory banks. She'd been searching the city all day with Dot, checking out every possible place that human beings could be found, but had come up with one dead end after another. No sign of the kids yet. No sign of Brad …

As Jenny and Dot walked out of the store, they heard a voice squawk to life from a small wall monitor next to the cashier. The screen turned red, and displayed the message Animal Control Alert. The manager of the store wheeled over to check the monitor, rubbing his stainless steel chin pensively with his clamp-shaped hand, as the screen changed to show a map of the city.

"Excuse me?" Jenny asked the pet store manager. "What does that message mean?"

"Hmm? Oh, nothing to be worried about," smiled the jovial robot. "Just a warning message from Animal Control – a couple of humans got loose over on the other side of town. Miles away from here, we're perfectly safe. A pair of adolescents – hmmm, they can cause a bit of trouble, now. A black-haired one with blemished skin, and a thin one with red, spiky hair. Animal Control will be on the scene in no time at all. Sometimes, the pet store gives them a hand with collars and tranquilizer guns …"

Jenny's eyes shot out to the size of basketballs. "Did you say red spiky hair? Omigosh … omigosh, that could be Brad!" She quickly memorized the map on the wall monitor, and grabbed her new friend by the wrist. "Dot, come on, we've got to go!"

Before Dot could ask for an explanation, Jenny dragged her out of the pet store, and onto the large balcony that jutted out from the eightieth floor of the copper skyscraper. As a small group of robots looked on with fascination, Jenny's back opened up with a series of whirrs and clanks, and she deployed her dual wings and booster engines. The turbines in the huge boosters spooled up to power, and Jenny waved for Dot to come closer. "Just hold onto my back, Dot, and I'll have us there in a jiffy!"

"Have us where? Where are we goiEEEEE …." Before Dot finished her sentence, a blast of exhaust shot out from Jenny's boosters, and she sailed into the busy skies of Cluster Prime. Dot buried her face into Jenny's back, too afraid to watch as the teen heroine spiraled in and out of airborne traffic, dodging her way between speeding hovercars and lumbering hover-trucks. Jenny called up her stored map of the capital, and charted out the fastest course from the pet store to the reported location of the escaped "wild animals". Something told her that this was the real deal, this time she was really going to find Brad and the others. She had to get there to rescue them, before Animal Control got to them first. Who knows what they might do to them? Her CPU was racked with worry, and she bumped up the power to her booster rockets to increase her speed.

She was so focused on racing to Brad's rescue that she didn't notice the pair of sleek black hovercars silently pull into traffic behind her. They followed at a discreet distance, and their occupants performed a series of scans on the robot girl, and ran the results through the central Cluster databases. The jet-black robots came to a unanimous conclusion, and the lead robot sent out an encrypted message:

Target has been identified as XJ-9. Notify Queen Vexus that her guest has been located. All Black Mantis units, converge on my signal.

Continued in Chapter Ten / Six Days to Cluster Dawn