It was late when Harry finally returned to the flat in Berlin, and Draco had spent the last twenty-four hours in a state of near-frenzy as he worried about Harry, what Harry was doing, where Harry was going. He was completely in the dark and he didn't like it in the least. He glared at a spot just to the left of the door frame as he heard the murmur of spells in the hallway and the door swung open, Harry propped up on the other side.
"Where have you been? Do you know how worried I was, thinking you might not be coming back?" Draco asked nonchalantly, his voice belying his true anger, though his refusal to meet Harry at the door did nothing to hide it.
"Draco, don't do this, please," Harry answered, his eyes tired and pleading as he laid down his broom and hauled a bag from over his shoulder. "I haven't slept in almost two days and I just don't have the energy for it."
His clothes hung loosely from his body, as if they had grown too large while he was gone, he had a split bottom lip, and Draco could see the exhaustion oozing out of him, so Draco gave in and let Harry keep his secrets again, crossed the room and into waiting arms.
After a few moments, Harry pulled his head back and told him, "We'll talk tomorrow, I promise." Draco forced a corner of his mouth up and nodded, then returned his face to Harry's shoulder. "I'm doing this for both of us."
Sometime between eleven and twelve that night, Minerva McGonagall had arrived in the hospital wing and, with assistance from Poppy Pomfrey, forced Severus and Hermione out for the remainder of the night. Severus had stayed by Dumbledore's side watching for sign that he would wake despite Poppy's assurances that she would inform him of any change in his condition, and Hermione stayed for Severus though he was distant and they rarely spoke. In the corridor outside, Severus turned towards the dungeons and Hermione stopped him with a hand on his arm.
"My quarters are just around the corner. We'd be closer if anything changes with Albus."
"I have business in the dungeons," he said, not quite meeting her gaze, his arm pulling away from her.
Frowning, she asked, "Not even just for a little while?"
"No, I do not think so. I have much to do and time is of the essence." His eyes were cold as he looked at her. "Classes are resuming as usual in the morning so I would expect to see you at lunch."
With that, he spun on his heel and retreated to his dungeons, alone.
"I don't even get a kiss?" she sighed and watched his retreating figure, wondering how much of his aloofness was Dumbledore and the attacks, and how much was her, though she couldn't figure out what she had done. She turned and walked the other direction to her quarters, not looking forward to the second night of sleeping there alone. She had thought last night, when he had declined her offer because he had tests to grade, was just a fluke, but tonight made her wonder.
His head dropped as his ears picked up the sound of her voice, but he forced himself to keep going, to not stop, to keep himself from rushing to her and folding her into his arms. His mind propelled him forward, on to the dungeons and away from Hermione.
It was time, he had begun to realize, to pull away from her, to separate himself from her, since the school year would end in just over two months and she would be gone. It was better to prevent any further developing attachments with the girl and things would be easier in June. It was better, he knew it. He would miss her in the dungeons, he knew already. It was silly how much he had come to depend on her assistance with the mortalis fallax potion. But she had been useful. Yes, he would miss her. In his dungeons.
She was dreaming again, but this time she was alone; she could not feel Severus behind her, his ever watching yet unseen presence, as she followed Harry through the fog.
"Harry," she called though she knew he would not answer. "Harry, wait."
"He's dying, and only one can save him."
"Draco? Who can save him?"
She stopped, not wanting to follow him further. She was tired of this dream, sick of watching it play over and over in her head and not understanding what Harry kept telling her.
"Harry!" she yelled once at his receding shape.
The clouds surrounded her and she could no longer see Harry. The emptiness of the place began pressing in upon her and she panicked, calling out for him and whirling around, having lost her direction with nothing to guide her. Seconds ticked into minutes and minutes grew until she could no longer remember how long she had been standing in the fog alone.
Early the next morning, Draco awoke sore and tired, as if he had been running marathons while he slept. It was only just a bit after five, but it was unlikely he would be able to sleep again, the potion was wearing off already and he was sorely tempted to take another before he lost use of all his muscles and was confined to the bed until it was safe to take the next dosage. He wouldn't, he knew, because Harry would be upset, for taking the potion would only mean he was pulling nearer the ever encroaching day of his own death.
Draco looked over at the sleeping form beside him and decided to let Harry sleep. He didn't know what Harry had been up to the previous night, but the last time Draco had seen him that tired had been a few months back when Voldemort summoned him to a Dark Revel and he had been gone for more than a day and a half.
He went to the kitchen and fixed a cup of tea, then returned to the worn sofa as he sipped it. The hot liquid spilled down his throat, forcing him to wake up incrementally. He sat and contemplated Harry's behavior and the warmth of the cup in his hand, feeling he understood the cup better than his own lover.
Halfway through the tea, a wave of exhaustion crashed and Draco carefully set down the cup then stretched out on the couch, not trusting his limbs to carry him back to the bedroom, neither wanting to wake up Harry to assist him. He closed his eyes and fell into a light and fitful slumber.
After doing as much as possible in the laboratory, Severus finally conceded to himself that perhaps he should check up on Hermione, since they had not made any progress with her memory block and the dream itself seemed the best way to access it, but especially now after the attack upon Dumbledore. And so, he found himself watching for hours from a chair by the bed as Hermione slept, unaware of his presence in the room.
It was nearly seven in the morning when she began to writhe in the bed, her legs churning the soft sheets, and he knew the dream had started. He took a steadying breath, stripped off his robes, lowered himself to the bed, pulled her into his arms, his mind reaching out to hers as he whispered the magic word, "Legilimens."
The fog surrounded him and he found himself suspended just behind Hermione, and he lifted his arms to embrace her floating form, though she couldn't actually feel him.
"I have something to tell you, Hermione," Harry called, his voice floating through the fog up ahead. "I have to tell you soon."
As if his presence emboldened her, she began to move towards the suspended voice with Severus following behind, and quickly they were in a clearing. It was all different from before, there was no bed, no Draco, and Harry stood before them, not the grown-up Harry, but Harry the fifteen-year-old, the angry teenager he remembered most, wearing red Gryffindor jumper, faded jeans, worn out sneakers.
"Hermione, I have to tell you something."
"Tell me, Harry."
Severus caught a shimmer of light behind Harry's shoulder and he moved towards it, swimming through the fog and past Harry, who paid him no mind, and suddenly he stopped in front of the source. A keyhole shined through, the light slicing through the fog like a hot iron, and Severus instinctively bent down and placed his eye against it, blinking as he adjusted to the brightness.
He could make out nothing at first, just blurred images until they grew larger and in focus and Severus fell forward through the keyhole and into images that whirred past him, which after a moment's orientation, he recognized Harry in every one; somehow Severus found a way into Harry's mind!
Harry talking with Lucius Malfoy at the Ministry … running through the Forbidden Forest with Ron … nude and wrapped around Draco Malfoy … visiting a petrified Hermione in the hospital wing … kneeling before Voldemort …
Everything went black and Severus jolted up in bed, gasping for air, his heart racing, and Hermione leapt out of bed as she woke up and saw him.
"Fuck, Severus, you nearly scared me to death! How long have you been here?"
He rubbed his face with his hands as she settled back on the bed beside him, tentatively placing her hand on his starched white shirt. He spoke after a long moment.
"I was in his mind. It was Harry, and he's been seeing Voldemort. That is all I could see before the connection terminated, but the implications are disturbing." He leaned back on the headboard, closing his eyes.
"What do we do now? Dumbledore's the only one who knows where he is!"
"Then we go to Dumbledore," he replied, and when he looked at her, she couldn't read his eyes. An arm slid about her shoulders and he pulled her to his chest. "Go back to sleep. We'll deal with him after you rest."
Suddenly tired again at his suggestion, Hermione tucked her face into his chest, breathing in the scents of the dungeons, longing to ask why he was being so distant but she every time she opened her mouth, the words wouldn't come, until finally she slept, her dreams calm and peaceful, but when she awoke an hour later, just in time for classes, Severus was gone.
Far away, in his flat in Berlin, Harry Potter also jolted awake, suddenly aware of Snape's presence in his head and quickly forcing him back out. He worried for a moment that Snape might have seen something, but quickly dismissed concern because his plan would come to fruition tomorrow and it would not matter if Snape knew everything.
After a moment, he also realized that the bed was empty, Draco absent, but a glance to the bedside clock told him it was nearly nine and Draco had just let him sleep. He threw back the covers and climbed out of bed, taking only a few minutes to throw on a seemingly clean pair of trousers from the floor and a white t-shirt, also grabbing a green jumper for later.
Walking into the living room, he spotted Draco asleep on the couch and he smiled, resisting the urge to wake him and kiss him, instead going to the kitchen to make a quick sandwich.
"Harry? Is that you?"
A mess of black hair followed by glasses and Harry's smile peeked around the corner and around the last bite of his ham and cheese he said, "I didn't mean to wake you."
"I was just resting," Draco answered. He felt stronger than before, so he hoisted himself up from the couch and joined Harry in the kitchen, who had out the vial for the polyjuice and grinned guiltily when Draco turned the corner.
"Going somewhere?"
"Yeah, I've got some business to take care of at the Ministry, but I'll be back in the afternoon."
"Will you tell me what's going on, first?"
Harry's green eyes clouded over and, setting down the potion, leaned heavily on the counter. He was tired of keeping secrets from Draco. The fluorescent bulb above flickered, the stark light enhancing the tired lines on Draco's already pale face.
"Alright, we'll talk," he said with a long exhale. "Are you hungry, thirsty?"
Draco shook his head wordlessly, a small frown indicating that he was growing weary of Harry's attempts to divert his attention. Finally Harry began.
"I started thinking about this a few months ago, just after Christmas, actually, and it took a while to work out all the details, but finally I did."
Draco waited patiently as Harry fidgeted with his shirt and rearranged the words in his head, then he brought his head up and his green eyes found Draco's grey.
"I decided to approach Voldemort for help, because who would know better a dark curse than the Dark Lord himself?" His eyes dropped and he continued, "But the trick was, how do I get him to tell me the countercurse? I only had one thing to offer him."
A heavy silence descended as Draco stared at Harry, first with confusion and then with astonishment as understanding fell on him.
"You gave yourself up to him?" His voice was just above a whisper, as if speaking the words softly would keep them from being true. Harry nodded, his eyes still averted and Draco asked, "But, why? Everything you -- we've worked for…."
"I -- I don't care." He brought his eyes up, unspilled tears making his eyes sparkle like emeralds. "What would it matter to me if the war is won or lost if you're -- you're not here?"
Draco's heart wrenched in his chest, as if someone had reached in and squeezed with all their might, and he felt his own eyes tear up. He desperately needed to reach out to Harry, to offer comfort, but he needed to find out the rest of it, the proverbial other shoe as there was undoubtedly with deals with the Dark Lord.
"What did you offer Voldemort?" he asked quietly, and at first he wasn't sure that Harry had heard him. As he was about to repeat the question, Harry answered and his voice matched Draco's quietude.
"Everything he wanted. Dumbledore, Hogwarts, Snape's potion. All of it." Again he couldn't meet Draco's gaze and it was just as well, for he wouldn't have been able to withstand the sadness there. "Yesterday, I went to Hogwarts, stole the potion, then poisoned Dumbledore and searched for the defences on the castle. I found a few things, but I know there's more, so I need to go to the Ministry and see what they have there."
"Harry," Draco murmured, knowing nothing else to say.
"I go back to Voldemort tomorrow, and once everything's finished and over, he will cure you."
Draco stood in the kitchen, speechless as he looked at Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived, the only one who could defeat the most powerful wizard in history, the one who was sacrificing the good of wizardkind for love, for him.
"Harry…."
"I need to go."
Harry slipped the polyjuice into his pocket, not even sure if he would need it, and walked out of the kitchen, stopping only to find a set of plain black robes and grab his broom.
"Harry."
Turning round to face Draco, his heart nearly burst as Draco's eyes broadcast all his love and fears.
"I'll see you soon."
He opened the door to the flat, then locked and warded it behind him. He climbed the stairs to the top of the building and mounted his broom, turning automatically towards London and the Ministry. He didn't let himself linger on his actions at the castle, of poisoning Dumbledore, not lethally, mind, but nonetheless he was betraying everything he had defended since he was a boy. As long as he didn't let himself think about it, he would be alright, but with a long broom ride ahead, it was hard to think of much else so he cleared his mind and watched the scenery shoot past.
The broom ride went smoothy, and within a few hours he entered the Ministry and immediately headed for the office of Cornelius Fudge, Minister of Magic, who would readily secure Harry with all the information he needed, or at least that was what Harry hoped, because he would not be able to escape should anything go wrong. He trusted that Hermione would keep the situation at Hogwarts under wraps as well, so as not to alert the Ministry and cause a panic.
Arriving at the anteroom to Fudge's office, Harry flashed his most brilliant smile and ran a hand through his hair with affected nervousness at his young secretary, a cute early-thirties witch who sighed dreamily as she went off to announce his presence to the Minister.
"The Minister will see you now," she cooed, her blue eyes fluttering at Harry as he passed, offering a parting smile as he clicked the door shut.
The office was just as pompous and crass as the last time Harry had been here, with the dark blues and golds and heavy, antique furniture. Cornelius Fudge rose from the opposite side of an enormous desk, extending his hand as he exclaimed, "Why, Harry! What a surprise! I hope you didn't wait long!"
Harry pumped the man's hand, replying and grinning, "Not long enough! I quite enjoy that little secretary of yours."
With a robust laugh, Fudge sat down in a large gold wingback and motioned for Harry to follow suit. "Yes, that Lydia is quite the treat, isn't she?" He folded his hands in front of him and leaned forward. "Now, what can I do for you, Harry? I trust this is not a social call."
"Indeed, it is not, Minister. I'm here on very serious business." He paused dramatically as the older and less competent wizard before him shuffled through papers on his desk, glancing up at 'serious business,' and Harry continued, "I need all the information on Hogwarts that the Ministry currently has."
"But Harry," the Minister began, obviously flustered by Harry's arguments, "this is highly irregular. I'm not sure that Dumbledore --"
"Albus sent me to pick up this information should Voldemort attempt an attack on the Ministry. He would have come himself, but he has taken ill."
"Nothing too serious, I trust," Fudge said warily. "Perhaps I should owl him myself."
Harry shrugged. "If you insist, but all you'll find out is that he's sick. I suppose I could go into London for a bit while we wait for word."
Fudge narrowed his eyes and replied, "No, that won't be necessary. If Albus wants to send you for the information, then I won't argue with that. Give me a few minutes to organize the necessary people."
"Of course, Minister."
Within fifteen minutes, the older man was back, instructing Harry to follow him to a library down the hall where several witches and wizards were sorting rolls of parchment into a few small bags, obviously charmed to hold much more than their sizes would indicate, and after a moment, they finished up and Fudge offered the two bags to Harry.
"This is what we have. Much of it is ancient, from well before the twentieth century, though we do have quite a bit from Dippet's time as Headmaster."
"Thank you very much, Minister. I'm sure this is everything the Headmaster would want."
"You tell Dumbledore to take better care of himself!" As they entered the hallway, Fudge turned back to Harry and said, "We can't afford for him to take too many days off, now can we?"
Harry forced a laugh and answered, "No, we certainly can't."
Fudge said goodbye, and Harry sighed as the bumbling wizard turned to return to his office and Harry headed for the front doors, hoping this was the last of the information he would need.
___
A/N:
Hey, it's up before Feb! I just need quality alone time with the computer and ch 31 will be up. Thanks so much for your patience in waiting for updates. A reminder that if you want to be alerted when there's a new chapter then:
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Codie, glad to see you around again!
