Pyro: Nessie6, 'ereby proclaims she owns nothin' of X-men Evolution... Cawn
Oy burn it now?"
Me- Yes.
Pyro- Burny, burny, burny! *proceeds to burn down disclaimer and many other things that he did not have permission to burn*
Me- That child needs to be slapped...
Chapter Seven- School
John and Ian walked side-by-side on the dusty road on their way to school. There had been a drought, and the green grass was starting to turn a yellowish-brown. John idly kicked stones, gripping the straps of his backpack tightly. He hated school. What was the point of math and all that stuff? Two plus two, whoopee. Another thing, second grade sucked and the teacher was an evil old hag.
The two of them arrived at the elementary school, and they entered. They made their way down the hall, hung their sweaters on their assigned hooks, and gathered their stuff. Walking into the tiny classroom, they sat down at opposite sides of the room; their assigned seats.
Naomi Harrison, all prissy and snobby walked in, her platinum blonde hair tied into a perfect ponytail, the ends curling. Her hazel eyes spotted John, and she sneered, taking her seat in front of him.
"'Ow ya doin' Naomi Harrison?" he asked her.
She curled her lip at him. "Oy don' wan' ta tawlk ta ya, St. John."
He tapped her on the shoulder and when she turned around irritably he gave her an innocent grin. "'Ow ya doin' Naomi Harrison?"
"If ya don' stop tawlkin' ta me, Oy'm tellin' Mrs. Leud," she sniffed.
"Sure thing, Naomi Harrison," he said and started drumming his fingers on his desk.
"Stop cawlin' me that!" she hissed. He only drummed his fingers louder and said:
"Oy can' do that! Isn't it yoah name?" he said. She merely growled.
"Class!" Mrs. Leud walked up to the front of the room and rapped her meter stick on the table in front of her. The class stopped its talking.
"Today weah gonna do our toimed math sheets," she said briskly and half the kids groaned.
The timed math sheets were when they were timed for five minutes to work on fifty problems. There were levels to this test, and to go to the next one you had to get every one of them right. John still hadn't made it past his first subtraction test.
John groaned when he was handed a sheet of paper. Blast those math problems!
The timer began.
'Noine minus foive is,' John thought, 'foah!'
He hastily scribbled down the answers.
Ding!
John jumped halfway out of his seat. That darn timer always did that to him. He looked back down at his paper. He didn't finish the last five problems.
He looked around and quickly wrote down random numbers. There was a ten percent chance he'd get the answer right anyways.
"Tha's cheatin' St. John," sang Naomi.
"'Ow woz Oy cheatin', Naomi Harrison?" he asked her, raising his eyebrows. She growled.
"St. John Allardoyce!" Mrs. Leud screeched. She really didn't like him at all. Partially it was because she had taught his brother, and automatically didn't like him, and partially because he was a little stinker in classes and disrupted them.
"Wot?" he asked innocently. Better not act smart around her.
She curled her bony finger at him, her brightly colored lips set in a snarl. He swallowed and walked over to her.
She pulled him real close by the ear. Her breath was warm against his ear and it smelled like a real bad coffee. "Oy could fail you, ya know," she threatened.
"Whoy?" he asked.
"Because then you would be unhappy, and Oy would really loike tha'," she hissed.
"But then, if you held me back, you'd have me anothah yeahr," he whispered back, feeling pleased with himself.
She growled and shoved him back. Told you she was an evil old hag.
John walked back to his desk and collapsed in it. They were supposed to read a book while Evil-Old-Hag graded the papers.
She tsked. And then she tsked again, giving John a satisfied glare. He failed again. Splendid.
"St. John, you failed again," she seemed to sing. Great.
John turned beet red, opened his desk, and hid his head. Damn her! Why did she always have to embarrass him all the time? It's not like he wasn't hated enough. He really didn't want Naomi Harrison to hate him, he just liked annoying her so much, and it was fun. She was kind of pretty...for a girl.
It didn't help that some of the kids snickered. Oh, was he ever the popular one. Yeah, he was aware that *some* girls had crushes on him but honestly! How obsessed can one person possibly get? He knew he was irresistible, even at eight, but he was really starting to creep out. Especially from some of the Valentines he had gotten back in February.
And that wasn't the only problem; the girls weren't even popular to begin with. It was girls like Ingrid Holmes that liked him, big-pimply (yes she was pimply at eight) Ingrid Holmes with big plastic glasses that magnified her eyes about one thousand times. He shuddered.
"Ow!" Naomi suddenly cried out, her hand automatically flying to her neck. John looked at her curiously then looked at Ian. Ian winked at him and snickered into his hand, placing a straw back in to his desk. Clever chap.
Naomi swiveled around in her seat as though her life depended on it and shot John a withering glare.
"If ya do tha' again Oy'm tellin'," she snarled in a whisper.
"Wot?" he asked as if he knew nothing about it. He knew Ian was staring at them.
"You know wot ya did," she growled, swiveling back to face the front, clasping her hands in front of her.
Mrs. Leud had been staring at them. Actually, she had been giving Naomi a concerned glance while at the same time giving John a look that suggested she wanted nothing but to strangle the living daylights out of him.
John sighed, opened his desk, pulled out a list and added a name.
Peeple That R My Enemies
Naomi Harrison
Sally Banks
Jaclyn Smith
Donner Kinsby
Wesley Craig (nosepicker)
Mrs. Leud
John hid the list again under his reading book.
They did a bunch of other boring stuff like English and spelling (he was horrible at that too) until the lunch bell rang. John bolted out of his seat, grabbed the plastic lunchbox and ran all the way to the tiny cafeteria. He plopped down at the table he usually sat at and ripped the plastic wrapping from his peanut butter sandwich.
"G'day," Ian said as he slid into his seat right next to John. John grunted in reply, his mouth full of bread, peanut butter, and chocolate milk.
Some of John's other friends also came and sat by them. Brad Davis, Henry Cowalt, James Theis, and Greg Ivanolli. They weren't as close to John as Ian was, and John certainly didn't trust them enough to tell them enough secrets, but they were okay.
Lunch was over and right after they had social studies with Mrs. Evil-Old- Hag she would lead them down the hall in a single line to the art room. John wasn't really that good at art either, but that doesn't mean he knew that. In fact, he thought he was awesome and his favorite animal to draw was a hippo. Usually they ended up looking like some weird demented peanut thing with googly-eyes and buckteeth. But to John, it was a masterpiece.
John sat down at his assigned art table with four other people that he hated: Naomi Harrison, her best friend Sally Banks, and their other friends Josephine Kline and Jaclyn Smith. Josephine had frizzy bright orange hair, with a few freckles scattered across her nose, but she had a pretty face, and she was surprisingly popular so she didn't count. Jaclyn was dark and tan, and maybe a little chunky but she took the role as bodyguard of the little group. Sally Banks had chestnut brown hair and gray eyes and also a pretty face, but that didn't make her nicer.
How on Earth John got stuck with four girls, he had no clue and he didn't think it was really fair. Well, it probably was because he dumped a whole bucket (it wasn't even that big! maybe a pint or so) of paint on Naomi Harrison's head. She deserved it. So then it was his fate that he had been moved from the table where Ian and Michael Kolts sat and to the table where Miss Prissy and Her royal subjects were.
"Ew, St. John wot in tha world is that?" Naomi pointed at his hippo in disgust.
"Snot." He muttered.
"Yoah drawin' snot? Eeww yoah so gross!" she scrunched up her face in disgust. Her royal subjects imitated.
"No," he hissed, "It's a hippo. But wotch out foah Wesley Craig, 'e's a nose-pickah."
"Eeewww!" All the girls moaned in synchronization.
"Yeah, you better 'ew,'" John muttered to himself so quietly nobody heard him.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*
John walked into his house and threw his backpack on to the floor. Irene skipped into the living room wearing a bright pink bathing suit with little yellow wavy things at the side by her hips. Her strawberry blonde hair was tied into curly pigtails, her thin bangs lying against her forehead; her light green eyes were sparkly.
"Look Johnny! Look wot Oy got!" she screeched excitedly at him, pulling the front of her bathing suit out.
"Stawp that!" he cried when she pulled it out too far and he could see her three year old chest. It really shouldn't be a big deal, since she's only three, but John's eight so it's understandable what his reaction would be.
She giggled and skipped back into the kitchen.
*~*~*~*~*~*
Ah HA! Five pages, 1,650 words...Take THAT temporary writer's block! Okay, I noticed that I never wrote little old Johnny at school, and I was deeply surprised by that so I put it here. If you could figure out in this chapter what's a foreshadow to an event you get a dollar and a nickel. Sorry, I'm cheap.
InsaneBunneh- YES I know about special brownies. Should you really be surprised?
Dark Jaded Rose- Oooh! This is on your favorites? Yay! Thankyou so much! Thanks for your review!
Anon (girl)- Here's an update. Like this one? Well, you should get cleaning on your room then if you want an account. I'd read your stories. Glad Fishy likes this too. Thanks for your review!
Don't-eat-chunky-pudding- You could have asked for nuts...Well I'm glad chibi Gambit's not starving at least. *pats chibi Gambit on the head*
The Rogue Witch- Yep, I agree about Jim Carrey not being his best in that movie. Personally, I love Dumb and Dumber, Liar Liar, and Ace Ventura. Especially in when Ace Ventura- When Nature Calls, and he comes out of the mechanical rhino's butt. That was priceless. Thanks for your review!
Also thanks for reviewing- I Am The Anonymous Reviewer, Shadow-Spider, AGST, Eh!, la cour de belles fleurs, sPoOkZ13412, zephyr, rosie, Pauline L., Wind Rider 2000.
Congratulations to The Rogue Witch, who got where "Smite Me, Almighty Smiter," comes from! It was from Bruce Almighty. Here's your batch of special brownies! Special ingredient...er...um...looove. *Ahem*
Dollars to all who review! We got 16 last chapter, how about 20 this time?
Like it? Hate it? Either way, review!
Me- Yes.
Pyro- Burny, burny, burny! *proceeds to burn down disclaimer and many other things that he did not have permission to burn*
Me- That child needs to be slapped...
Chapter Seven- School
John and Ian walked side-by-side on the dusty road on their way to school. There had been a drought, and the green grass was starting to turn a yellowish-brown. John idly kicked stones, gripping the straps of his backpack tightly. He hated school. What was the point of math and all that stuff? Two plus two, whoopee. Another thing, second grade sucked and the teacher was an evil old hag.
The two of them arrived at the elementary school, and they entered. They made their way down the hall, hung their sweaters on their assigned hooks, and gathered their stuff. Walking into the tiny classroom, they sat down at opposite sides of the room; their assigned seats.
Naomi Harrison, all prissy and snobby walked in, her platinum blonde hair tied into a perfect ponytail, the ends curling. Her hazel eyes spotted John, and she sneered, taking her seat in front of him.
"'Ow ya doin' Naomi Harrison?" he asked her.
She curled her lip at him. "Oy don' wan' ta tawlk ta ya, St. John."
He tapped her on the shoulder and when she turned around irritably he gave her an innocent grin. "'Ow ya doin' Naomi Harrison?"
"If ya don' stop tawlkin' ta me, Oy'm tellin' Mrs. Leud," she sniffed.
"Sure thing, Naomi Harrison," he said and started drumming his fingers on his desk.
"Stop cawlin' me that!" she hissed. He only drummed his fingers louder and said:
"Oy can' do that! Isn't it yoah name?" he said. She merely growled.
"Class!" Mrs. Leud walked up to the front of the room and rapped her meter stick on the table in front of her. The class stopped its talking.
"Today weah gonna do our toimed math sheets," she said briskly and half the kids groaned.
The timed math sheets were when they were timed for five minutes to work on fifty problems. There were levels to this test, and to go to the next one you had to get every one of them right. John still hadn't made it past his first subtraction test.
John groaned when he was handed a sheet of paper. Blast those math problems!
The timer began.
'Noine minus foive is,' John thought, 'foah!'
He hastily scribbled down the answers.
Ding!
John jumped halfway out of his seat. That darn timer always did that to him. He looked back down at his paper. He didn't finish the last five problems.
He looked around and quickly wrote down random numbers. There was a ten percent chance he'd get the answer right anyways.
"Tha's cheatin' St. John," sang Naomi.
"'Ow woz Oy cheatin', Naomi Harrison?" he asked her, raising his eyebrows. She growled.
"St. John Allardoyce!" Mrs. Leud screeched. She really didn't like him at all. Partially it was because she had taught his brother, and automatically didn't like him, and partially because he was a little stinker in classes and disrupted them.
"Wot?" he asked innocently. Better not act smart around her.
She curled her bony finger at him, her brightly colored lips set in a snarl. He swallowed and walked over to her.
She pulled him real close by the ear. Her breath was warm against his ear and it smelled like a real bad coffee. "Oy could fail you, ya know," she threatened.
"Whoy?" he asked.
"Because then you would be unhappy, and Oy would really loike tha'," she hissed.
"But then, if you held me back, you'd have me anothah yeahr," he whispered back, feeling pleased with himself.
She growled and shoved him back. Told you she was an evil old hag.
John walked back to his desk and collapsed in it. They were supposed to read a book while Evil-Old-Hag graded the papers.
She tsked. And then she tsked again, giving John a satisfied glare. He failed again. Splendid.
"St. John, you failed again," she seemed to sing. Great.
John turned beet red, opened his desk, and hid his head. Damn her! Why did she always have to embarrass him all the time? It's not like he wasn't hated enough. He really didn't want Naomi Harrison to hate him, he just liked annoying her so much, and it was fun. She was kind of pretty...for a girl.
It didn't help that some of the kids snickered. Oh, was he ever the popular one. Yeah, he was aware that *some* girls had crushes on him but honestly! How obsessed can one person possibly get? He knew he was irresistible, even at eight, but he was really starting to creep out. Especially from some of the Valentines he had gotten back in February.
And that wasn't the only problem; the girls weren't even popular to begin with. It was girls like Ingrid Holmes that liked him, big-pimply (yes she was pimply at eight) Ingrid Holmes with big plastic glasses that magnified her eyes about one thousand times. He shuddered.
"Ow!" Naomi suddenly cried out, her hand automatically flying to her neck. John looked at her curiously then looked at Ian. Ian winked at him and snickered into his hand, placing a straw back in to his desk. Clever chap.
Naomi swiveled around in her seat as though her life depended on it and shot John a withering glare.
"If ya do tha' again Oy'm tellin'," she snarled in a whisper.
"Wot?" he asked as if he knew nothing about it. He knew Ian was staring at them.
"You know wot ya did," she growled, swiveling back to face the front, clasping her hands in front of her.
Mrs. Leud had been staring at them. Actually, she had been giving Naomi a concerned glance while at the same time giving John a look that suggested she wanted nothing but to strangle the living daylights out of him.
John sighed, opened his desk, pulled out a list and added a name.
Peeple That R My Enemies
Naomi Harrison
Sally Banks
Jaclyn Smith
Donner Kinsby
Wesley Craig (nosepicker)
Mrs. Leud
John hid the list again under his reading book.
They did a bunch of other boring stuff like English and spelling (he was horrible at that too) until the lunch bell rang. John bolted out of his seat, grabbed the plastic lunchbox and ran all the way to the tiny cafeteria. He plopped down at the table he usually sat at and ripped the plastic wrapping from his peanut butter sandwich.
"G'day," Ian said as he slid into his seat right next to John. John grunted in reply, his mouth full of bread, peanut butter, and chocolate milk.
Some of John's other friends also came and sat by them. Brad Davis, Henry Cowalt, James Theis, and Greg Ivanolli. They weren't as close to John as Ian was, and John certainly didn't trust them enough to tell them enough secrets, but they were okay.
Lunch was over and right after they had social studies with Mrs. Evil-Old- Hag she would lead them down the hall in a single line to the art room. John wasn't really that good at art either, but that doesn't mean he knew that. In fact, he thought he was awesome and his favorite animal to draw was a hippo. Usually they ended up looking like some weird demented peanut thing with googly-eyes and buckteeth. But to John, it was a masterpiece.
John sat down at his assigned art table with four other people that he hated: Naomi Harrison, her best friend Sally Banks, and their other friends Josephine Kline and Jaclyn Smith. Josephine had frizzy bright orange hair, with a few freckles scattered across her nose, but she had a pretty face, and she was surprisingly popular so she didn't count. Jaclyn was dark and tan, and maybe a little chunky but she took the role as bodyguard of the little group. Sally Banks had chestnut brown hair and gray eyes and also a pretty face, but that didn't make her nicer.
How on Earth John got stuck with four girls, he had no clue and he didn't think it was really fair. Well, it probably was because he dumped a whole bucket (it wasn't even that big! maybe a pint or so) of paint on Naomi Harrison's head. She deserved it. So then it was his fate that he had been moved from the table where Ian and Michael Kolts sat and to the table where Miss Prissy and Her royal subjects were.
"Ew, St. John wot in tha world is that?" Naomi pointed at his hippo in disgust.
"Snot." He muttered.
"Yoah drawin' snot? Eeww yoah so gross!" she scrunched up her face in disgust. Her royal subjects imitated.
"No," he hissed, "It's a hippo. But wotch out foah Wesley Craig, 'e's a nose-pickah."
"Eeewww!" All the girls moaned in synchronization.
"Yeah, you better 'ew,'" John muttered to himself so quietly nobody heard him.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*
John walked into his house and threw his backpack on to the floor. Irene skipped into the living room wearing a bright pink bathing suit with little yellow wavy things at the side by her hips. Her strawberry blonde hair was tied into curly pigtails, her thin bangs lying against her forehead; her light green eyes were sparkly.
"Look Johnny! Look wot Oy got!" she screeched excitedly at him, pulling the front of her bathing suit out.
"Stawp that!" he cried when she pulled it out too far and he could see her three year old chest. It really shouldn't be a big deal, since she's only three, but John's eight so it's understandable what his reaction would be.
She giggled and skipped back into the kitchen.
*~*~*~*~*~*
Ah HA! Five pages, 1,650 words...Take THAT temporary writer's block! Okay, I noticed that I never wrote little old Johnny at school, and I was deeply surprised by that so I put it here. If you could figure out in this chapter what's a foreshadow to an event you get a dollar and a nickel. Sorry, I'm cheap.
InsaneBunneh- YES I know about special brownies. Should you really be surprised?
Dark Jaded Rose- Oooh! This is on your favorites? Yay! Thankyou so much! Thanks for your review!
Anon (girl)- Here's an update. Like this one? Well, you should get cleaning on your room then if you want an account. I'd read your stories. Glad Fishy likes this too. Thanks for your review!
Don't-eat-chunky-pudding- You could have asked for nuts...Well I'm glad chibi Gambit's not starving at least. *pats chibi Gambit on the head*
The Rogue Witch- Yep, I agree about Jim Carrey not being his best in that movie. Personally, I love Dumb and Dumber, Liar Liar, and Ace Ventura. Especially in when Ace Ventura- When Nature Calls, and he comes out of the mechanical rhino's butt. That was priceless. Thanks for your review!
Also thanks for reviewing- I Am The Anonymous Reviewer, Shadow-Spider, AGST, Eh!, la cour de belles fleurs, sPoOkZ13412, zephyr, rosie, Pauline L., Wind Rider 2000.
Congratulations to The Rogue Witch, who got where "Smite Me, Almighty Smiter," comes from! It was from Bruce Almighty. Here's your batch of special brownies! Special ingredient...er...um...looove. *Ahem*
Dollars to all who review! We got 16 last chapter, how about 20 this time?
Like it? Hate it? Either way, review!