Title: Losing Everything

Author: Estonia Lockhart, or more commonly known as Gwynje

Rating:PG-13 for mild language

Continuity: I guess it's post X1. Maybe an in-between.

Summary: Logan takes matters into his own hands.

A/N: Grrr, I'm angry at right now. They won't let me indent, and they're just being mean. Oh well. Thanks for the reviews to all!

Feedback: Please!

"So.." Logan trailed off, brushing Marie's hair out of her face, enjoying the feel of her soft, warm skin against his finger. Glancing up in helplessness at Xavier, they all waited for his judgement.

Xavier sighed, age clearly showing in his face through the severely increased frown lines burrowing deep into his forehead. "It is Rogue, not another mutant posing as her." Exclamations rose in the room, as Scott half rose in his seat, Jean leaned heavily against the wall, and Ororo sat on Xavier's desk with a loud thunk. Logan's eyes brimmed with tears, but he fought them back, not breaking the movements of his finger on her face.

"Just today, I noticed her presence using cerebro, when she was following you." Logan glared at Xavier, and reminded himself to tell the telepath to mind his own business and stop tracing him with his damn machine. "I have men out there in the cemetery, digging up the grave."

"That's not right," Jean broke in, her hands shaking, eyeing the sleeping Rogue warily.

"What else do you suggest we do?" Xavier asked, his voice rising. "Digging up the body is the only way we'll know for sure whether or not she-" he gulped, his eyes shifting over to her.

"Rose from the dead," Logan finished, shivering slightly as he spoke the words.

A soft, low moan came from Marie's lips, as she twitched in her sleep. Suddenly, sweat broke out on her forehead, and she writhed under Logan's hand, screaming. "No, No!" Rising sharply from the bed, Rogue gazed at them, wide-eyed, panting heavily. Eyebrows knitting together in confusion, she tore off her gloves and raised the sleeve of her uniform. The needle punctures were still there. It hadn't been a dream. Everything was real.. so horribly real.

Logan spotted the punctures and growled low in his throat, grabbing her arm in his hand. "Who the hell did that do you?"

Closing her eyes momentarily, Rogue slowly drew her arm out of his grasp. "Magneto," she whispered, rubbing the area numbly, gazing around at the rest of the X-Men.

Xavier leaned forward in his wheelchair, gazing at her with a focused intensity. "Rogue," he whispered gently, "tell us what happened to you."

Marie leaned back against the bed, propping herself up into a sitting position. "I didn't die," she spat, forcing the words out of her mouth. "Magneto- he made Mystique take my shape, then told Sabretooth to kill her, so you would think it was me."

Logan's claws shot out with a terrifying snikt, and he thrashed them through the air in fustration. "Dammit!" he screamed. He should have been able to tell the difference. He should have known it wasn't Marie. How could he have mixed up one of his greatest and most despised enemies with the person he'd come to love more than anyone else in the world?

Xavier shot him an annoyed glance, "Logan, calm down. Let her finish." Reverting his gaze back to Marie, he beckoned her on. "What's the next thing you remember?" She shook her head silently. How could she go on when Logan had his back turned to her, his claws slashing through the air, and his guilt obvious in the air. He shouldn't feel guilty; it wasn't his fault. None of it was his fault. Instead of continuing, she whispered, "Logan."

Slowly, he turned around and faced her, his eyebrows drawn together tightly, his eyes red and glistening as his claws gradually retreating back into his knuckles. Extending her hand out towards him, Marie nodded encouragingly. "Come here."

Logan rushed to her side, hot tears now slipping down his tightly drawn face; Marie's heart broke. Their hands combined tightly, both of them squeezing with all of their might. "Don't blame yourself," Marie murmured to him, lifting her other hand to wipe away his tears.

"I should have known," he replied stubbornly, turning his face away, as if feeling unworthy of her forgiveness. "You've suffered all this time because I-"

Rogue cut him off sharply. "And you've suffered too. I can see it." She drew his chin toward her, so she could gaze into his eyes, give visual proof that she knew. The pain was everywhere in his face. She could never remember him looking so much like hard stone, the sharp, rough edges still lingering. He looked as he once had in the cages, except his sorrow was more palpable and solid.

"Logan, I didn't die." Marie could feel her chin trembling now as he gazed back into her eyes, trying to keep his own emotion under control. Could he have really suffered that much- for her? "The thought of you kept me alive there." Then, pressing her face against his, she whispered firmly in his ear, fearing he wouldn't believe her, "The thought of you kept me alive. You saved me, Logan."

Reverent silence filled the room as the team of X-Men looked on, feeling their own faces tremble with emotion. The connection stringing those two together was so tangible, so enigmatic that it couldn't be mistaken for anything else. They were each other's foundation, and without each other, they would crumble. After all, hadn't they witnessed Logan shattering right before their eyes, when he thought Marie had been lost to him forever? With each other, life made sense for them. Somehow, they felt it was something they could never wholly understand with their minds, but feel with their hearts. And, that was basically all they needed to understand the bond between the girl with white streaks and the man with long, vicious claws: their hearts.

In her deep brown eyes, Logan found what he'd been searching for and needed all along; something he'd always had, but hadn't recognized: her forgiveness and love. There was no mistaking it. She didn't blame him at all; but, that was because Marie was a good person, and if she'd gone through unimaginable grief because he hadn't recognized that it wasn't really her lying in that coffin, there was no way she would tell him. He still blamed himself; he could have stopped it. But, he had Marie in front of him now, touching his face, near him, breathing. That was all he needed.

Still holding on firmly to his hand, Marie relaxed and glanced at the professor, ready to tell him her story. All of the X-Men became alert again, recovering their sharper senses of the task at hand. "Magneto brought me to an underground facility, and he was determined to still, somehow, use my mutation...."

Logan crushed the cigar in his mouth, aimlessly slicing the material of the couch with one of his claws. Marie was upstairs sleeping; and he would be up there too, if Jean hadn't convinced him to leave so she could finish diagnosing her. They had tried to bring Marie into the medlab, but she'd screamed as soon as she saw the white room and needles lying on the table. It had been as if she didn't even remember where she was or who she had been with; she'd practically scratched Jean's flesh off her face while trying to get out, and it had even taken Logan a few minutes to calm her down.

He'd murder Magneto for this. There was no way that bastard was going to stay alive after doing that to her.

Marie, he knew, had told her story in the most matter of fact way possible, not adding any of the harsh extremeities she had gone through; he knew she didn't want him to worry. But, her resigned look and pained expression made it obvious that there was more to the story than she was telling.

A burning need for revenge was sparked within him, scathing his insides with the poisonous want of seeing Magneto, broken and dying, paying for what Marie was going through now. Before, Magneto had only been a group enemy; someone everyone disliked. But this time, he had struck too close to home. He had taken the only person Logan needed, and tortured her, sending her back into the world screaming and thrashing for life.

He would pay.

The tip of his cigar was smoldered in the ashtray, and left there unattended when Jean arrived to tell him it was all right for him to visit Rogue again. When a search was made, they found one of Scott's motorcycles gone, and a strong scent of burnt rubber drifting up from the driveway. The team was in hysterics, and they all crowded into Xavier's office once again, trying to find out where he had gone.

But what they didn't know, was that while Xavier was wheeling himself quietly toward cerebro, Marie woke up, finding a small note folded into her hands.

I'll be back soon.
-Logan.