Chapter Two: Monarchy vs. Democracy

After King Elessar and Patsy had 'ridden' out from the mysterious fortress, they realized that it was going to be quite a while until the reached civilization. Aragorn tried to start a conversation.

"So… um… do you like being a horse?"

"Neigh."

"Nay?"

"Neigh, neigh."

"If you don't like being a horse, then why are you here?"

"Neigh."

"Do you say anything other then nay?"

"Neigh."

"Alright… er… where did you find those coconuts?"

"Neigh."

"Fine!" Aragorn glared at Patsy and that was the extent of their conversation for their whole trip.

-

They finally reached a rebuilt Osgiliath the next day. All threats of winter storms had passed to the North, and people in the Shire and Bree were suffering. No one important heeded them, however.

Osgiliath was not as bad as it was when it was in the rule of the Stewards; it was worse. Sure, everything was rebuilt, but it was rebuilt very crudely (the fall of Sauron caused a lot of celebration, so the population increased greatly within the next couple of years. Thus, they didn't have time to build better homes). Most were living in small straw houses, or in very simple stone houses. The people in Minas Tirith were oblivious to the fact that their whole land was filled with turmoil.

People were dying every day in Osgiliath- it was so ridden with disease and famine that death was quite common. In fact, every week a man came through the town to collect the dead. This particular day, he was going through the Citadel of Death… I mean, Citadel of the Stars… and collecting the dead bodies. He was pushing a large wheelbarrow, and it was already filled with bodies.

"Bring out your dead!" he shouted aloud. Someone groaned. "Bring out your dead!"

A man approached him, carrying an old lady. "Here's someone," he commented.

"That will be one gold coin," the man that was collecting the dead said.

"I'm not dead!" she shouted aloud.

"She said she's not dead," the other replied with a shrug. "I can only take dead people."

The old woman nodded. "Do you hear him? Now you put me down, Baradil, and I hope you know that you are grounded for five years!"

"Mother," the man called Baradil muttered. "Quiet."

"No, you be quiet! You need to show me more respect! I gave you birth! Now you remember that, you!"

Baradil looked at the dead collector with a pleading look in his eyes. "Please, will you not take her?"

"Eh… sorry, I really can't…" he started.

"For two gold pieces?" Baradil begged.

"Um… well…"

"Three? How about four?"

The man with the wheelbarrow finally gave in. He looked around him, found a stray frying pan, and knocked the old woman unconscious.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you," Baradil said, dumping his mother on the pile of bodies. He gave him four gold coins.

Of a sudden, Aragorn came 'riding' into town, avoiding the manure as well as he could manage. Many people bowed to him, and he rode with his head held high. He did not see the two men or the cart filled with people, and he continued on.

"Who was that?" asked Baradil.

"Must be the King," said the other grudgingly.

"Oh… king of what?"

"Gondor."

"So he's responsible for this town and its state?"

"Most likely."

"Why don't we impeach him if he such a bad king?"

"We're living in a monarchy- we don't vote."

"Oh yea…"

-

King Elessar rode out of Osgiliath, ignoring the mutters behind him of monarchy and impeachment. He came to the skirts of the town, and saw a lone commoner building something, their back turned to him. In the distance was a strange-looking building, something that resembled a large house. It was a beige color, with a white door, glass windows, and a red roof. Smoke came out of a chimney and one bright light came from the interior of the house. The grass beside the place was well kept, and the roses were in bloom. This house did not belong in the area.

Aragorn and Patsy stopped in front of the commoner, but they did not lift their head. Aragorn lifted his head up high, and waited for the commoner to respond to him. They did not.

Aragorn finally decided to get his attention. "Ma'am-"
"Man! I'm a man!" he responded, turning around.

"Oh, sorry, you looked like a woman from this angle-"

"You could have asked for my name, you know," he said with scorn.

"I already said I was sorry," Aragorn countered. "Anyhow-"

"You still haven't asked for my name," he interrupted. "That is just rude."

"I'm in a bit of a hurry, so I don't have time-"

"Don't have time to make pleasantries with me? What, am I inferior to you?" The man glared at him.

"Well, I am king-"

"Oh, king, eh? And I bet you have a lovely palace with servants and guards and no work at all, while we here in Osgiliath spend every hour of our waking life trying to survive. Y'know, you should be thinking more about the people and how to improve their lives; how do you expect any progress?"

"I do-"

"And you still haven't asked me my name! That is certainly very, very rude."

"Oh, fine! What be your name?"

"John Ronald Reuel Tolkien, and you should be happy for my existence."

"Why should I be happy for your existence?"

"Never mind that, Thorongil-"

"How do you know of that name?"

"Long story. Anyhow, don't you want to know more about me? I mean, you should want to get to know your people, you know. Why are you exploring the lands? Are you actually going to improve the area?"

"Well, I was actually looking for lords for my Parallelogram Table." Aragorn beamed.

"Oh, that's nice. Though that is a copyright issue; Arthur came up with the Round Table quite a while ago… did you get permission?"

"I am king; I can do whatever I want!"

"There we go with that king thing again. You know what this is?" John held up the strange device in his hand. "This is a typewriter. I am going to fix this old thing and change Gondor's monarchy into a democracy, complete with elections and women's rights."

"You better!" someone shouted. The two men looked up from their conversation and saw a woman approaching.

"Hello, Edith. Look who's here."

"Oh, hello Estel," said Edith.

"How did you-"

"Don't you worry about that," said Edith. "Now, John, you are going to have modern day women's rights, correct?"

"Not with the women's rights again!" groaned Aragorn. "Arwen is already complaining on women's rights. How she found out about the starts of it in America I-"
"How do you know of America?" John asked him.

"I'm not sure," replied Aragorn. "I just do."

"Oh." There was an uncomfortable silence.

"So… who lives in this strange place?" asked the King.

"We do," said Edith.

"Where did you come up with such strange designs?"

"This is how every house looks like in Britain," said John. "We made some blueprints of the foundation, and built it from scratch. Unfortunately, we cannot get electricity, but we do have oil lamps, water from the river, and other things."

Aragorn nodded. There was yet again an uncomfortable silence.

"Oh… well, I'm going to rewrite this after I get this done, so you better be on your way, Aragorn. I need to get in modern technology, women's rights, democracy, and other modern advances into this world…"

Aragorn gave the two a strange look, shrugged, and rode away with Patsy.

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RESPONSE TO REVIEWS:

ShakiraCrazy: I know no turtle has bitten you ;-) Of course you were thanked! You are my best buddy ever! :-D Arwen does rock! Well, I'm glad you liked :-)

The Noble Platypus: Ha, I love the music - Of course you were in it! You so totally rock! XD I know… POTR be darned… that has so died out. I just have no inspiration to continue I have so many other ideas, its not funny!

Lindsey: Coconuts! Hehe, there is a huge part on coconuts in the movie, like this. You do need to see the movie! And Aragorn is so stupid its funny! XD

BubbleBubbleGumGum: Thanks! I really do appreciate your review! :-D

Orliey: AH! Another O.B. fan! hides LOL. Anyhow, I am glad you liked it. I do think I will finish… I hope I do. This story I particularly like.

Leggy's lover: AH! Not another Legolas fan girl! hides :-P I am glad you enjoy it!