The Immortal LaMoore Series
Proudly Presents
RANMA ½
Disclaimer: I do not own this product, but I do own the character of Keanon LaMoore. Thank you & enjoy the story.
"" Indicates speech
Indicates thought & telepathy
( ) Indicates whispering
# # Indicates sound effects & Panda signs
[ ] Indicates author's chance for a pun
{ } Indicates actions during speech
In our last installment: The godlike being Keanon LaMoore returned to Nerima after a two year absence to the woman he loved, Nabiki Tendo. After creating a little chaos & revealing his secret to one Ranma Saotome, he watched over Nabiki as she slept. Today, he begins his mission of love to bring couples together that won't admit they belong together.
The Next Day"What a beautiful morning!" said young Nabiki Tendo as she opened her window & looked out on the world.
She looked down & saw that Ranma & his father were sparring in the yard again, & her younger sister was heading out for her morning jog. Normally the sound of the Saotome morning spar would have upset her, but since her true love Keanon LaMoore returned yesterday not much could bother her anymore.
Amazing what being in love can do for one's outlook on life. thought Nabiki.
Isn't that the truth? said a familiar voice in her head.
Nabiki looked around the area & finally spotted who she was looking for. Floating in the air above her home was the godlike being & her true love, Keanon LaMoore, who wore the same clothes he wore when he approached her yesterday afternoon, minus the sunglasses. Nabiki knew of course that he had several of the same outfits. This way he never had to decide what to wear.
"Morning love." Keanon said with a smile that made Nabiki's hearts quiver every time he did it.
"Good morning handsome." Nabiki said as he floated down in front of her & gave her a kiss on the tip of her nose. "What brings you by so early in the morning?"
"Well, I was hoping to study Ranma for awhile." Keanon said. "I might have a way to cure him of his curse, but I need to confirm something about him."
"That thing you mentioned about him having two auras?"
"Exactly." Keanon said.
"Then why don't you join us for breakfast?" asked Nabiki.
"Isn't it to late to ask Kasumi to set another place?"
"Not really." Nabiki said. "I told her you were coming over last night."
"Oh really?" said Keanon with that smile on his face again. "Just how did you know I'd be here?"
"Just a hunch." Nabiki said with a smirk.
"Good hunch." Keanon said. "I accept. I'd be a fool not to accept a meal from Kasumi."
"Alright then." Nabiki said as she went into her room. "I'll change & see you downstairs."
"See you down there." Keanon said as he floated to the ground. He then decided to watch as Ranma & Genma continued to spar. Keanon, who knew several forms of Martial Arts himself, saw that Ranma's style was flawless, but Genma's had so many different flaws it wasn't funny.
This Genma claims to be a master? thought Keanon. What a joke.
Keanon continued to watch as the fight continued, until Ranma spotted him after knocking Genma into the Koi pond turning him into his Panda form.
"Hey Keanon." Ranma said cheerfully. "How're you doing this morning?"
"Never better." Keanon said as the Panda whacked Ranma in the back of the head.
#Pay attention boy!# said the sign the Panda was holding.
"Stuff it pop!" said Ranma. "Can't you see I'm talking to my friend!"
#Your getting weak boy!# the next sign read as Ranma kicked him into the wall surrounding the dojo & knocked him out.
"Nice form Ranma." Keanon said applauding. "I have but one question however?"
"What's that?" asked Ranma curious.
"Why were you holding back? You could have ended this fight much sooner if you hadn't held back."
"If I used my full strength, I could have killed pop." Ranma explained telling Keanon about Phoenix Mountain & the one time he had to kill an opponent. "I've killed once, & I want to avoid it happening again."
"Truly a remarkable tale Ranma." Keanon said sympathetically. "When I had first started learning to control my powers I ended up wiping out an entire galaxy. After two decades of training I eventually learned how to restore the entire galaxy like it hadn't happened, but the pain still hurt that I'd killed them."
"So you understand?" said Ranma who was happy to finally meet someone who understood what he was going through.
"Ranma, you just have to understand one simple thing." Keanon said. "You were trying to protect Akane. If the only way to stop Saffron was killing him then so be it. True you might have been able to find another way, but we'll never know for sure. The important thing is to learn from the past, & not make the same mistakes."
"Whoa." Ranma said impressed. "That's deep."
"When you've been alive as long as I have, you tend to think about little things like that a lot." Keanon explained as Akane came out of the house revealing she had returned from her jog, & was dressed in her gi preparing to crush some bricks in the dojo.
She took one look at Keanon & her eyes turned ice cold.
"What're you doing here?" said Akane still angry that Keanon had deserted her older sister like he had.
"Nabiki invited me over for breakfast." Keanon said looking at her casually. "I must say Akane, you've grown up to be a very pretty girl."
"Pervert!" yelled Akane as she pulled out the Mallet-o-Doom & prepared to make a LaMoore pancake.
At least, that was her plan, until a voice of reason quickly spoke up.
"What did we discuss last night little sister?" said the voice of Nabiki Tendo causing Akane to freeze in mid smash mode.
"But Nabiki, he's dating you, but was just hitting on me!" said Akane.
"Actually, I was complementing you Akane." Keanon said calmly, even for someone with the Mallet-o-Doom pressed against his forehead. "I remember when you were just a little middle school girl. I bet the boys knock themselves over to ask you out don't they."
"Actually, she knocks them out." Ranma said with a chuckle as he explained to Keanon about the hentai horde he met on his first day.
"You mean that idiot actually thought he had the right to say that Akane could only go out with anyone who could defeat her in battle?" said Keanon in shock. "Where the hell did he get that idea?"
"Beats the heck outta me?" said Ranma.
"Why didn't you put a stop to this treatment?" asked Keanon.
"I tried, but Kuno never listens." Akane explained.
"That's not what I meant." Keanon said. "I meant, why didn't you tell those boys you beat up everyday?"
"I'm sure she tried that Keanon." Ranma said. "Only an idiot wouldn't think of that."
"Ummmm…" said Akane blushing as Nabiki, Ranma, & Keanon all reached the same likely conclusion.
"You didn't think of telling them!?!" exclaimed Nabiki in shock. "Why wouldn't you think of that?"
"I did so!" said Akane defending herself. "It's not my fault they didn't listen!"
"Let me guess…" said Keanon. "…you told them, after you had beaten the crap out of them?"
"So, they should have still listened!!!" said Akane.
"Akane…" said Ranma chuckling. "…by the time you told them that, they were already either passed out from the pain, or in so much of it that they wouldn't have heard you anyway."
"Oh." Akane said as she realized her blunder.
"Breakfast is ready!" called out the kind voice of the oldest Tendo sister, Kasumi.
Everyone quickly headed inside, including Genma who awoke at the sound of food being ready.
The meal was quiet & peaceful for a change. Keanon made polite conversation with Soun after removing his gloves & coat, & fended off Genma as he attempted to steal food from his plate. Akane sat thinking about what she'd realized this morning. Nabiki, Ranma, & Kasumi also talked with Keanon who told the family about his travels, at least what he could tell them, leaving his godhood out of it.
When the meal was finally finished, Akane, Ranma, & Nabiki ran off to school, Soun & Genma went to play their never ending game of shogi, & Keanon stayed behind surprisingly enough to help Kasumi do the dishes.
"You don't have to help you know." Kasumi said being polite as Keanon picked up the washcloth so he could wash.
"After a delicious meal such as that, I wouldn't feel right unless I did this." Keanon explained as he filled the sink with hot water & began washing.
Kasumi decided why fight it, & just accepted the help with one of her brightest smiles. They worked like this in silence, Keanon washing while Kasumi dried, before Kasumi finally spoke up.
"So, how were you're travels really?" asked Kasumi.
"What'd you mean?" asked Keanon as he picked up a plate & began scrubbing it.
"Well, I would imagine traveling to different dimensions would be exciting." Kasumi said casually as Keanon suddenly broke the plate in his hands. "Oh my! Are you alright?"
"I'm fine." Keanon said looking at Kasumi in shock. "What makes you think I travel to different dimensions?"
"Oh come now Keanon. I know you're a god." Kasumi said with that smile on her face.
"You do!?!"
"Of course." Kasumi said as Keanon fixed the broken plate with his powers restoring it to it's original form.
"How did you find out?" asked Keanon as they finished the dishes & he drained the sink.
"Well, I was walking through the park from the market when you told Nabiki." Kasumi said. "Then Nabiki told me while she was in her room crying after you left."
"I see." Keanon said as his coat, gloves & sunglasses appeared on him magically. "So, how do you feel about Nabiki & I dating?"
"I think it makes my little sister special to have attracted the attention of a god." Kasumi said. "I know you'll do all you can to protect & watch over her."
"I thank you for your vote of trust & confidence." Keanon said bowing before her. "If I can help you out in anyway, shape or form please let me know."
"Well, I was thinking about asking you about something…" said Kasumi.
"Yes?" asked Keanon.
"Well, I was wondering…" Kasumi said as she decided not to ask him for help with Dr. Tofu & quickly asked something else. "…could you help bring master Happosai under control? It's getting hard on our budget to by new underwear every two weeks."
"Happosai?" asked Keanon in confusion as he was embarrassed to admit that he had looked into Kasumi's mind & picked up the vibe about Dr. Tofu. "Who's he?"
"He's the grandmaster of the school of Anything Goes Martial Arts." Kasumi said as she told Keanon all about the perverted old man.
"So this old man steals the underwear of the girls around here, feels them up, & your father & Ranma's father are afraid of him because he's suppose to be stronger then they are." Keanon said as cups of tea materialized in his & Kasumi's hands.
"That's about right." Kasumi said sipping the tea Keanon provided.
"Leave it to me!" said Keanon sounding a little angry as he teleported away.
"Oh my!" said Kasumi a little worried. "I hope he isn't to rough on Happosai!"
Meanwhile, across town, the aforementioned pervert was running across the rooftops, crying out about what a haul he'd collected. As usual, a large bag of women's underwear was on his back.
"What a haul!" cried out Happosai as he leapt towards the next rooftop.
Suddenly, as soon as he touched the roof, lightning from the sky struck before him, taking the form of a young man with red hair, wearing silver reflective sunglasses, a white muscle shirt, black jeans & boots, a long black trench coat, & black leather gloves. The young man appeared to be very angry. [Guess who this is? Come on, guess!]
"Are you the one they call Happosai?" asked the young man.
"What if I am?" asked the master of the anything goes martial arts.
"If you are, then you die!" replied the young man with a voice so cold, that it would freeze the ocean itself.
"Better men then you have tried!" said Happosai realizing he just confessed who he was to this man.
"I'm not like most people!" said the man with a smirk.
"Happo-Fire-Burst!!!" yelled the old man as he threw three of his explosives at his assailant.
To Happosai's surprise, they exploded before they made contact.
"What the heck!?!" said the old man confused.
"Allow me to introduce myself." The young man said. "I am Keanon LaMoore! Your executioner!!!"
Happosai froze in fear. After his brief stay in the Amazon village he'd heard rumors & legends of the all powerful godlike being who was an ally to the tribe. But, this man couldn't be the same man. Could he?
"You have to catch me first!!!" yelled Happosai as he took off running.
"Caught you!" said Keanon as he suddenly appeared in front of Happosai & grabbed him by the neck.
"Ack!" said the old man choking. "How? What? Where?"
"Bye-bye!" said Keanon as Happosai was soon surrounded in a ball of light. In this moment, Happosai knew that this was the same person.
When the ball of light diminished, all that was left in Keanon's hand was a pile of ash.
"That takes care of that." Keanon said brushing his hands off. "I'll give him about two hours. That'll be a good lesson learned."
Two hours later, Keanon stood on the roof of the Tendo Dojo. A flash of light surrounded him & the deceased Happosai stood before him.
"Where am I?" said Happosai more afraid then anyone would have ever seen before.
"Back among the living." Keanon said. "How was the after life?"
"Where was I?" asked Happosai.
"Hell." Keanon explained. "It's where you can expect to go when your life of sin catches up with you."
"It…it was horrible!" cried Happosai.
"However, it can be avoided." Keanon said.
"How?" pleaded Happosai.
"I'm a man who believes that a man can change his ways." Keanon said. "So, if you repent your ways, & make it up to those you've wronged, then when your time comes, you'll go to heaven. If the guys upstairs decide you've redeemed yourself."
"Yes!" said Happosai. "I swear it! I will change my ways!"
"Then go!" said Keanon. "I give you one chance! Don't blow it."
"I won't sir!" yelled Happosai as he leapt off into the distance.
This has got to be one of the weirdest mornings yet. thought Ranma at lunchtime as he sat under a tree & ate his bento.
Less then one hour ago, Happosai had entered his classroom, & apologized for all he'd done to him. He then went to all the classrooms & told all the girls there how sorry he was for treating them the way he did & even told them to come to the dojo on Saturday where he would return all he took from them. He even went as far as to name Ranma a true master of the Anything Goes Style.
The apocolypse must be coming. thought Ranma.
"No, just me." A voice said beside him.
Ranma looked to his left & found that he had been joined for lunch by none other, than the one & only, Keanon LaMoore.
"Oh, hey Keanon." Ranma said as he went back to eating. "What'd you mean you happened?"
"I had a little chat with Happosai." Keanon said as he hung his coat on a branch of the tree & sat on the grass next to him. "I convinced him to change his ways."
"How'd you do that?"
"I sent him to hell." Keanon said casually as he spotted Nabiki walking towards them.
"Oh." Ranma said deciding that was all he really wanted to know & went back to eating.
"Hey handsome." Nabiki said as she sat next to Keanon.
"Hello love." Keanon said as they shared a quick kiss. "What would my love like for lunch today?"
"I just finished eating." Nabiki said. "But thanks for the offer."
"No problem." Keanon said as he noticed Ranma had finished his lunch. "Would you care to join me in some lunch Ranma?"
"Sure." Ranma said. "What'd you got to eat?"
"I'm feeling like a Philadelphia Cheese Steak." Keanon said as he snapped his fingers & the city of brotherly loves best treat appeared in his & Ranma's hands.
"Mmmmmm." Keanon said as he bit into his. "Delicious."
"Yeah." Ranma said as he ate his. "This is good! Almost as good as Okonomiyaka!"
"Ah, another fine treat." Keanon said. "But it pales in comparison to Chicago Style Deep-Dish Pizza."
"Really?" said Ranma amazed as he finished his cheesesteak.
"Try some & you tell me." Keanon said as a plate of it appeared in between the three of them.
"Don't mind if I do!" said Ranma as he picked up a slice & bit into it.
"So much for my diet." Nabiki said as she grabbed herself a slice & ate.
"Love, I've told you many times you don't need to diet." Keanon said as he finished his cheesesteak & started in on the pizza. "Your beautiful just the way you are."
"Flatterer." Nabiki said as she spotted some sauce on the corner of Keanon's mouth. "Here, let me clean that sauce up for you."
Ranma wondered how she would clean it up when they didn't have napkins. He then blushed up a storm when Nabiki licked the sauce off Keanon's mouth.
"Get a room you two!" joked Ranma.
"Hold foul sorcerer!" said a voice behind them.
The three of them turned & saw the idiot of Furinkan High, Kuno Tatewaki standing there in his samurai clothing & brandishing his bokken.
"What'd you want now Kuno?" asked Ranma.
"Foul sorcerer!" said Kuno. "I demand you release the beautiful Akane Tendo & the firey pig-tailed girl from you wicked spells or face the wrath of heaven!"
"Is this moron for real?" asked Keanon.
"Unfortuneatley." Ranma said. "For the last time Kuno! I'm not holding anyone!"
"Lies!" yelled Kuno as he attacked.
He swung his bokken at Ranma who leapt out of the way, only to come close to hitting Nabiki. As he turned to face the foul demon Saotome, he suddenly felt a cold chill down his back.
"You!!!" said Keanon as the very air around him chilled. "How dare you!!!"
"Who are you to speak so formally to one such as I?" said Kuno, who in his insane mind didn't see Keanon as a real treat. "But wait! Isn't it customary to give one's own name first? Very well. I am the rising star of the Kendo world, the Blue Thunder of Furikan High School, Kuno Tatewaki, age seventeen."
"I am Keanon LaMoore!" said the angry god. "I should kill you for almost striking Nabiki!"
"Bah!" spat out Kuno. "I have no time for your nonsense. Ranma must be defeated."
"Nonsense!!!" yelled Keanon as the very ground began to shake beneath his feet. In fact, the entire country of Japan was shaking. "You dare to try & hurt my lady love, & claim it as nonsense!!! For that alone, I should destroy you!"
"Like one such as you could defeat me." Kuno laughed. "Very well, Keanon LaMoore. I accept your futile challenge!"
"That was your first mistake!" said Keanon with a smirk. "Are you able to feel the battle auras of others?"
"Of course fool!" said Kuno. "Why do you ask?"
"Feel this!" said Keanon as he released his a small portion of his battle aura. He'd learned how to release it carefully from his good friend Goku, & knew that Kuno would be shitting himself soon.
"This…this is impossible!" said Kuno in shock, as Keanon aura almost blinded him.
"This is a small fraction of my power fool!" said Keanon as energy crackled all around him. "Care to feel it's full force?"
"Enough." Kuno said. "I, concede & apologize to the fair Nabiki."
"Wise move." Keanon said. "Now leave my sight, before I crush you like I did Happosai earlier today!"
Kuno quickly ran for his life. As soon as he was out of sight, Ranma started laughing his ass off, as did Nabiki.
"That was to good!" said Ranma. "Please tell me you got that on tape?"
"Well…" chuckled Nabiki as she held up a small video camera.
"Hah!" laughed Ranma. "Let me know how much you want for a copy?"
"This one's on the house." Nabiki said as Keanon's aura vanished. She then noticed Keanon had stopped time for that little display & now restarted it now.
"Are you alright Nabiki?" asked Keanon concerned.
"I'm fine baby." Nabiki said as she hugged him. "Don't worry about me."
"That imbocile!" said Keanon looking at where Kuno had ran off to. Seconds later his eyes glowed an strange blue.
"What did you just do?" asked Ranma.
"I just turned all the water in the Kuno estate in water from the spring of the drowned rat." Keanon said.
"Hah!" Ranma said laughing again. "Now that I'd like to see!"
"Well, as much fun as this has been, I've really gotta get going." Nabiki said as her & Keanon shared a passionate kiss.
"A girls gotta earn a living right?" said Keanon.
"You know it." Nabiki said as she walked off.
"Gods! What a woman." Keanon sighed.
"You say so." Ranma said as they sat back down.
"I most certainly do say so." Keanon said. "But, down to business. I have some questions that may lead to your cure."
"Ask away."
"Well, I was curious. Were there any complications when you were born?"
"Beats me. Why?"
"I need too know why you give off two auras." Keanon said as two drinks appeared in his hands. "Smoothie?"
"What's a smoothie?" asked Ranma accepting the drink.
"Think of it as an energy drink." Keanon said drinking his. "It's really quite good."
"Cool." Ranma said drinking his. "As for your question, I don't really know."
"Do you know anyone who would know?"
"Maybe pop, or mom." Ranma said. "What flavor is this?"
"Strawberry Banana." Keanon said. "So, let's ask your father."
Keanon snapped his fingers & Genma appeared before them.
"I've got you beat now Soun!" said Genma as he realized he was at Ranma's school & not playing shogi with Soun anymore.
"Pardon the interruption, but I was wondering if you could answer a question?" said Keanon calmly.
"Wh…what question?" asked Genma nervously.
"When Ranma was born, did anything else happen?" asked Keanon.
"Not that I remember." Genma said. "But I was on a training trip at the time."
"I see. Thank you for your time." Keanon said as he snapped his fingers & Genma vanished, only to be replaced by Nodoka.
Unfortuneatley, she was naked & covered in soap suds at the time.
"AHHHHHH!!!!" screamed Nodoka covering herself. "Who're you?"
"My apologies ma'am." Keanon said blushing up a storm as a robe appeared on Nodoka. "I had no idea you were in the bath."
"Sorry mom." Ranma said as she noticed her son & realized she was safe.
"Hello Ranma." She said composing herself. "Whose your friend?"
"I am Keanon LaMoore madam." Keanon said. "Again I apologize. I wouldn't have brought you here if I didn't have a question to ask?"
"What question?" asked Nodoka.
"Did anything happen as Ranma was born?" asked Keanon.
"That…is a very personal question." Nodoka said. "Why do you wish to know?"
"I believe the answer can cure Ranma of his curse."
"I see. Well, the only this that happened was his sister dying."
"Sister?" said Ranma shocked.
"Yes Ranma." Nodoka said with tears in her eyes. "Your twin sister died at birth."
"I see." Keanon said. "I'm sorry for bringing up bad memories. However, with this knowledge, I feel I can do this."
"Do what?" asked Ranma & his mother.
"Cure you of your curse, & restore you sister to the living!" said Keanon calmly.
TO BE CONTINUED…Author's Notes: Well, that's chapter two. Hope you enjoyed it. Next chapter has magic & love as Keanon cures Ranma, restore's the dead, & plays matchmaker. See-ya then.