O O O
Authoress Note: I have started one of those lovely C2 communities and if you are interested in being a part of it, let me know! Drop me an e-mail, better yet, drop me a review telling me so! I'm now "hiring" staff members! Be a part of the Lost Characters of Lord of the Rings! Oh yea and this is my special Halloween treat for you all. Have a Happy Halloween, All Hallows Eve, All Saint's Day, Day of the Dead, whichever it is you want to call it.
To my reviewers (all one of you...)
Ithillen: Thank you for your very inspiring review, for some reason it just hit me right in the happy spot and made me very happy! Thank you for that. I don't know why but I read it and it was just funny.O O O
"So, we were in this tavern and Boromir is getting really trashed with their ale and he's hitting on the women there and having a great time. Well, it only took a few hours before Boromir was completely and wholly drunk, just in another world kind of drunk. We are sitting at the bar listening to some guy tell a crazy story about his pirating days when Boromir whispers that he is going to go over and try to hit on the most gorgeous lady in the bar. She is sitting in the back corner, she knows she looks good and she is not giving anybody the time of day. Guys have been trying to get with her all night and she is just not having any of it." Faramir is really starting to get into his story when Boromir cuts in,
"That's pretty much all there is to tell about that story too." Boromir threw up his hands.
"No, no, no, there's more to tell." Faramir smiled evilly and continues, "Boromir heads over there and all the guys that we are sitting with are watching him. We all know that this lady is going to burn Boromir and burn him bad, and it'll be even funnier because he is just so drunk. Boromir sits at the table with the lady and the three guys that she is at the tavern with. Boromir starts talking and this woman is not even so much as looking at him, let alone paying attention to what Boromir has to say to her. So finally Boromir thinks he has got this woman completely interested in him so he leans over, puts his arm around her and gives a big kiss." Faramir pauses for a moment.
"And?!" Aragorn just can't take waiting to hear the rest.
"It wasn't the lady that Boromir had just kissed, it was one of her manly escorts. Boromir has just kissed a man!" Faramir burst out laughing with everyone else there, sans Boromir.
"HAHAHAHA! That's soooo funny!" Eomer is the loudest one in the group, anything that burns Boromir, and something that bad is just to much funny for Eomer to handle. The guys are just beyond themselves right now, rolling on the ground kind of laughing and Boromir is fuming.
Faramir stops laughing for a moment, "That's not all thought, the guy puts his arm around Boromir and smiles! The guy likes men!!"
"WHAT!?!" Aragorn and Eomer are now holding onto each other laughing at this, just too good, it's just way too good.
"It's NOT that funny!" Boromir shouts amid the rampant laughter.
"Yea, Boromir realizes what he has done and goes to leave but the guy wants him to stay. For the rest of the night the guy follows Boromir around and wants to see him again the next night! Boromir had to sneak out of the tavern to get home so that guy wouldn't follow and now every time we go through the second level Boromir tries to hide his face so no one will recognize him from that night!" Faramir couldn't hold back his laughter any longer and joined in with Eomer and Aragorn as they slapped their knees and gradually lost their breath as they laughed at Boromir's poor misfortune.
"Yea, yea, yea, laugh it up some more." Boromir grumbled and headed towards his tent.
The laughter continued on for another good twenty minutes before the others decided they would head toward their tents for the night.
O O O
Deep into the darkest part of the night when the earth's most mysterious creatures are out stirring in their nocturnal lives, the men and elves were all deep in slumber. The clouds in the sky were just partially covering the full, red moon. The camp was silent and the fire had finally died.
Eomer was dreaming of a lady that he had met only a few days before this trip, he was imagining the things he would like to be doing with her when he returned. Though his pleasant slumber was soon rudely awakened when someone grabbed a hold of his shoulder.
"Who!? What?!" Eomer woke up with a start.
"Ahh!" Faramir was startled by Eomer's sudden consciousness.
"What?!" Eomer looked behind him.
"Put a shirt on." Faramir tried to cover up his own moment of weakness.
"What?" Eomer pulled his blanket over his naked chest.
"Did you hear something?" Faramir asked seriously.
"Just you waking me up and screaming." Eomer retorted.
"No, before all that." Faramir asked.
"Just the screaming of the lady in my dreams." Eomer answered gravely.
"What? Never mind, I don't want to know." Faramir shook his head, "I heard something out in the woods."
"Maybe a squirrel? Or a deer? There are other animals in the woods other than just you." Eomer couldn't believe that Faramir was in here asking him about the usual noises of the woods.
"No, it was different." Faramir tried to explain to Eomer.
"Go, talk to your brother." Eomer lay back down, he was tired.
"Ugh, fine." Faramir left the sleepy Rohanian (is that a word?) to his slumber, and dreams.
Faramir crept out of Eomer's tent and looked around, okay, he didn't hear anything. Wait! What was that!? Faramir stood still, should he run or just stay still? He had to stay still, his legs wouldn't move.
"What are you doing?" Aragorn emerged from out of the trees and stared at Faramir.
"What are you doing?" Faramir asked, trying to be cool.
"Taking a piss." Aragorn explained, quite bluntly at that too, (gods I love men).
"Well, me too."
"What, in Eomer's tent?" Aragorn asked.
"No, I just happened to pass by it on the way." Faramir started heading back towards his tent.
"Oh, okay." Aragorn nodded, though he didn't believe it and now he was starting to think that the story Faramir told earlier was maybe wrong. It was Faramir who hit on the man who likes men, not Boromir, and Faramir liked it. Yea, that was Aragorn's opinion.
Faramir crawled back into his tent and listened. There it was again! Faramir flung open his tent 'door' and looked out. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Faramir was frustrated now.
"Hello?" Faramir called softly. No answer. Was he really expecting one?
Suddenly there was a large crash from somewhere in the woods. Faramir let out a little girly scream and threw himself under his blanket in his tent. This crash, and scream, effectively woke all the elves up though. Legolas emerged from his tent and looked around, "What was that?" He asked as both Elladan and Elrohir stuck their heads out of their tents, "Dunno." Elladan shook his head.
"There's something strange about these woods." Elrohir looked around.
Legolas and the other two elves gathered around the dead campfire, peering into the depths of the woods, looking for something.
"Should we go look for it, or stay here?" Elladan asked.
"I say, stay here." Legolas answered quickly, he wasn't going into those dark scary woods.
"Are you scared?" Elladan taunted.
"Why don't you go into the woods if you're so big and bad then." Legolas turned and waited for Elladan's reply.
"No thanks." Elladan replied.
"Okay, then."
The three elves stood, waiting for something the happen. Suddenly a dark figure came bursting out of the trees, a terrifying scream emitting from it, it held a long sword before it and had garments of ragged black cloaked over it. It was headed right towards the elves.
The elves, in the manliest fashion they could muster screamed bloody murder and ran away.
The men, failing to sleep through all this woke up and rushed out of their own tents to see what was going on. The sight of three elves screaming and running before a ragged black clothed figure greeted their eyes.
"AHHHHHH!!!!" Legolas ran past Aragorn, not stopping to say hello. Aragorn thought quickly, um...run!! Aragorn made post haste and followed after Legolas, he sure as hell wasn't staying around for this party.
Eomer tripped (it's always a blonde who trips, I just couldn't bare to break that tradition) on a stick while running after Faramir and Boromir who, both took lead after Elrohir's example and were running after him.
The cloaked figure rushed towards Eomer but luckily Eomer saved himself just in time before the sword came crashing down just where he had been lying only moments before.
Eomer ran after the others before him into the woods.
O O O
That's all folks. Who was that strange black cloaked figure? I don't know. Find out next time on There were Seven!!