Disclaimer:
I leaned against my Harry-Potter-poster-covered wall, writing in a notebook. "You know the drill. I own nothing, although that may change."
"Why?" Boromir asked. He'd been trying to get a peak at my notebook for several weeks.
"I have a plan," I explained quietly and without looking up from my notebook.
"What is it? Are you gonna take over the world?" Aragorn said eagerly. He reminded me a bit like my dog, but I still loved him.
"No," I continued quiet as a mouse, "that's Kim's plan. I'm a bit subtler."
"Can you tell us?" Boromir asked.
This made me look up from my notebook. "No."
They both made the cutest puppy-dog faces and begged, "Pwease?"
My response was still the same. "NO!" I closed my notebook to emphasize my point.
"Why not?" was Aragorn's timid reply.
"I like you both alive. Except you, Boromir. I never liked you. Until I saw the Extended Edition of the Two Towers on DVD, that is."
They both blinked simultaneously. It was then that I remembered that I hadn't shown them the Lord of the Rings movies.
A/N: That's some random cheer for you. Now ON WITH THE STORY!
ESCAPE FROM REALITY
CHAPTER 4: Go Directly To Jail, Do Not Pass Go,
Do Not Collect 200 Dollars
"Jack, get up!" I said for what seemed to be the fifteenth time. His head had stopped bleeding, but now I was on top of him, trying to get him up. Food was laying on the floor in a bowl and I really didn't want to know what it was.
"Love," Jack muttered as he rubbed his temples, "I say this with the utmost respec'. Shut up. I'm tryin' ta think, savvy?"
"Jack!" I yelled, overjoyed. "You're alive!"
"Why wouldn't I be, love?" Then, Jack just realized our positions. "Bloody 'ell, love, if yeh wanted me this bad, yeh should've mentioned it." I immediately jumped off him.
"I don't want you."
"Sure, love, tha's what they all say. Yeh know I'm irresistible." Yes, I did know that, but I didn't want some smutty pirate to take advantage of me.
I was just about to respond when the pirates next to our cell started calling the dog over, using numerous things, such as bones and their food. The dog didn't move. It just sat there, just out of their reach with the keys in its mouth. I couldn't help but laugh.
"Love, what're yeh laughin' 'bout! As far as I can see, our situation is hopeless!" I turned to him and smiled. I had finally remembered how the movie went. I guess I got some type of amnesia when I fell on the wooden harbor. Thank goodness that it only affected that part of my memory.
"Not as hopeless as one would think."
I lay on the floor as I tried to capture all the warmth; Jack's tattered coat resting just below my shoulders. The Pearl's going to arrive in…three…two…one— I thought as a canon went off in the distance.
"I know those guns," Jack muttered as he scurried to the window. "It's the Pearl."
"Ooo, I'm good," I muttered to myself. "So, now what?"
Jack turned to me with a maniac glint in his eyes. "We wait till tha' lyin' scank Barbossa gets here, tha's what."
About fifteen minutes after waiting, a hole was blasted in between the two cells. The hole in our cell, however, was just small enough to fit one eye out of. The other one was, of course, big enough for them to escape. "Sir, m'lady, it seems as though you have no matter of luck," a pirate with rather bad oral hygiene said to us.
"Oh, shut up!" I said, throwing a small rock at the pirate's head. I hit it and the pirate yelped in pain. "Score!" I think I was going delirious at that point.
"Love, tha' won't help," Jack replied simply.
"You want a rock in your skull, too?"
Our conversation was interrupted by a crash, then two unconscious soldiers tumbled down the steps. Two pirates stepped over them, apparently thinking that the jail was a military storehouse.
"This ain't no armory," a pirate Twigg said angrily and somewhat disappointed.
"Well, well, well, look what we have here, Twigg—Captain Jack Sparrow," another pirate Koehler told his companion.
Twigg spat on the ground and continued his conversation with his fellow buccaneer. "Last time, I saw yeh, yeh were all alone on a godforsaken island, shrinkin' inta the distance. Yer fortunes aren't improved much."
Jack didn't seem the least bit worried. "Worry about yer own fortunes, gentlemen. The deepes' circle of Hell is reserved for betrayers and mutineers." Koehler reached into the moonlight to grab Jack 's throat. His arm was turned skeletal and his shirt-sleeve looked like that it was disintegrating right in front of our eyes. I gave a small shriek of surprise as Jack said, "So, there is a curse. That's—"
"Interesting," I said along with Jack. Hey, a girl can't help her obsessions.
"You know nothing of Hell," Koehler said as he jerked his arm back. Koehler and Twigg walked out menacingly.
"Tha's very interesting," Jack said as he examined the bone he held in his hand.
The light streamed through the cell ,waking me up and I saw Jack picking the lock with the very bone the lucky pirates—who used to be in the next cell over—were using to get the dog-slobbered keys last night.
"Jack, what the heck are you doing?" I asked him sleepily, trying to decipher what he could be doing in my mind.
"Trying to get us outta here," Jack answered. "Please." There were footsteps, quick and in a hurry. Jack jumped down on the dirty ground and laid down, pretending to sleep. I rolled my eyes and yawned.
"Sparrow!" Will called. Jack pretended to wake up from a deer stupor.
"Aye," Jack said easily.
"Are you familiar with the ship, the Black Pearl?"
"Where does it make berth?" I let out a small giggle at Will's sentence, finally making myself known. Both of them raised one eyebrow at me. I inquired myself furiously, Why can everyone else do that but I can't!
"Where does it make berth? Have yeh not heard the stories, mate? Captain Barbossa and his crew of miscreants sailed from the dreaded Isla de Muerta. It's an island that can't be found excep' by those who already know where it is."
"The ship's real enough, therefore its anchorage must be a real place. Where is it?"
Jack studied and polished his nails on his shirt. "Why ask me?" he asked carelessly.
Will leaned again the metal bars and sighed. "Because you're a pirate," he said, quiet and disdainful.
"So, you want to turn pirate yourself?" I asked, intrigued. Jack looked at me like a fish out of water and Will stared daggers at me, like I deeply offended him. My stomach dropped a few inches. I hated offending people.
"Never!" Will replied, almost spitting out the words. "They took Miss Swann.
I had a crazy urge to say "awww," but resisted. "Oh," Jack declared matter-of-factly, "so it is tha' yeh've found a girl. Well, if yeh're intendin' to brave all, hasten ta her rescue, an' so win fair lady's hear', yeh'll have to do it alone, mate. I see no profi' for me."
"I'll go," I said, standing up quickly. Oh, please, I need an adventure in my life, I begged in my head.
"You know where Isla de Muerta is?" Will asked, half-puzzled and half-excited. Okay, more puzzled than excited.
"Well," I said as something dawned on me, "no, but I'll help all the same. I know a little bit about parrying." I smiled weakly. Will raised his eyebrow again.
"Anyway, I can get you two out of here."
"How? The key's run off!" Jack and I said at the same time.
"I helped build these cells. These are half pin-barrel hinges," Will said as he picked up a bench and placed it at the bottom of the cell door, just above the lock. And people think I'm obsessed, I thought as Will explained, "With the right leverage and a proper application of strength, the door will lift free."
"Wha's yer name?" Jack asked curiously
"Will Turner," Will answered
"Tha'll be short for William, I imagine. Good strong name. No doub', name of yer father, aye?"
"Aha, well, Mr. Turner, I've changed me mind. If you spring me from this cell, I swear on pain of death, I shall take you to the Black Pearl and your bonny lass. Do we have an accord?" Jack reached his hand out of the cell to shake Will's hand.
"Agreed." They shook hands.
"Can I come?" I asked. I knew that I was getting pretty annoying, but my life was pretty boring and I didn't feel like just sitting in this cell, waiting for the gallows. "Please?"
"Are yeh willing to—" Jack started, but I cut him off.
"Yes, yes. I am, " I said hurriedly. I really wanted that adventure...AND if I was a Mary-Sue, then I couldn't die, so that wouldn't matter.
Jack shrugged. "The more, the merrier."
Will nodded and lifted the bench up. The cell door groaned and fell free. The metal clucked on the floor and Will announced, "Hurry, someone would have heard that."
Jack and I ran out as Jack said frankly, "Not without my effects."
A/N: Yep. Oh, I don't know what to say, just review!