Usual disclaimers apply.
A/N: 7th CHAPPIE! WOOHOO:throws confetti: HAPPY NEW YEAR! OK, I'm waaaaaaay too hyper. On with the happy, happy story...WEHA!
Oh, and that's for all of the reviews!
ESCAPE FROM REALITY
CHAPTER 7: The Proposition
We walked through the town to a pigsty, where a man lay sleeping with pigs. I cringed. This part of the movie always made me cringe. But the smell was a lot more reeking then I expected it to be. That wouldn't be the last thing that was more than I expected.
Jack and Will were both holding buckets that were rather suspicious. Jack threw his bucket of water on the bearded man to wake him up. Some of the pigs woke up with the man.
"Mother's love! Jack!" The man yelled, surprised. "You know better than to wake a man when he's sleeping. It's bad luck."
I snorted. Then I'm the unluckiest person in the world. I always woke up my sister Julia, when she needed to be awake.
"Fortunately," Jack answered, "I know how to counter it. The man who did the waking buys the man who was sleeping a drink. The man who was sleeping listens to a proposition by the man who did the waking."
The man looked as though he was trying to work out this riddle. I thought all he worked out, being half-asleep and all, was that he'd get a free drink. I giggled at the thought.
"That'll about do it," the man said and Jack helped him up…
…Just so he could get another bucket to the face. "Blast! I'm already awake!"
"That was for the smell," was Will's reply.
We walked to a pub, which frankly wasn't better than outside. Jack ordered two pints of rum and asked me if I wanted anything. I've never had anything alcohol. Not even on New Years Eve. No, I'm not kidding
I told you I was a good girl.
Anyway, when we got to a secluded place to sit, he told Will and I to "keep a sharp eye" out. He obviously doesn't know me. Me, protect. Ha! I couldn't protect a platypus. See, they're extinct.
So, anyway, I leaned on the wall, looking around. Nope, still just sin and debauchery. And I'm still a strong Christian. I looked down again. Why can't we just leave? I thought silently. Can I just leave? Why was I sent here anyway? Did God think this was a funny joke or something? Did he want to teach me something or want me to change something? Hmmm…I wonder if there are any platypi in the Caribbean…Yeah, I have a weird obsession with things that end in 'us' such as platypus, octopus, and cactus. I only do because their plurals are fun to say.
Will interrupted my strange thoughts by saying, "So, this," he gestured to the pub, "is Tortuga?"
"I guess…it is pretty weird," I answered.
"What are you thinking about?"
"Nothing interesting."
A few moments of silence…then—
"Excuse me, miss…excuse me, stop, please," Will said to the opposite side of him. I sighed of exasperation. Stupid whelp.
I turned and said as menacing and lustful as I could, "He's with me. Back off." Yeah, acting!
The…well, large whore who was trying to flirt with Will scowled and turned on her heel. I sighed in relief.
"Thanks," Will said, breathless. My attitude in Tortuga didn't exactly say that I would pretend to be a two-whateverpeopleintheCaribbeanuse (work it out, people) hooker. Oh, well. Things change.
"Let's just say…it's a matter of leverage," I heard Jack say. Will slowly turned his head. It was one of those head turns that was like "Hey, you stole me line!" I sighed again.
"'Matter of leverage,' says you," Gibbs replied. "'I think I feel a change in the winds,' says I. I'll find us a crew. There has to someone on this rock crazy as you."
"One can only hope." And with that, they sealed the deal with a clunk of wood on wood.
A/N: Yes, I know; very short and a carbon copy of PotC with a Mary-Sue in the mix. Please, just review people!