Disclaimer: Artemis Fowl- not mine. Harry Potter- not mine. Any questions?
Artemis Fowl was in the process of diverting twenty-seven million dollars to one of his Swiss bank accounts when he was interrupted by a very small, very odd-looking creature.
"Artemis Fowl," the creature said, "Never thought I'd be seeing you again. It appears that your heart is as black as ever," he remarked, glancing at Artemis' computer screen.
Artemis was stunned. No one had ever gotten past his security systems before. At least not that he remembered..."Who are you? How do you know me? How did you get in? Where-" Artemis composed himself.
"Juliet!" he called.
"What?" she asked, appearing in the doorway. She wasn't as polite as Butler but she was just as good, which was the only reason Artemis kept her around. "I was in the middle of- Oh." She stopped as she saw the intruder.
"Could you please tell me how this little cretin got in?"
Juliet was at a loss. "I-"
"Cretin?" The creature interrupted. "Hardly! Don't you remember me?"
Artemis' brow furrowed as he searched his memories. "Vaguely..."
"Mulch Diggums, at your service," he said, bowing graciously.
"Charmed," Artemis replied sarcastically.
Mulch chuckled. "Some things never change, do they? Anyway, I believe I have something that might be of interest to you." He produced a small disk, which Artemis took.
"How do I know this doesn't contain a virus that will ruin my system?" he asked, looking at it suspiciously.
Mulch shrugged. "Destroy it, for all I care. But you're the one who gave it to me."
Artemis' curiosity got the better of him. He scanned the disk for viruses and, deciding it was clean, opened it. He was completely unprepared for what he got. All the schemes, adventures, rescue missions, and- Artemis swallowed as he reached the file on Holly Short- friendships he had experienced since first learning about the fairy world came flooding back.
"Oh my God."
Artemis' eyes sped across the page, greedily reading about all he had done and the technology he had used. His mind reeled as he imagined the amount of money he could make.
"Well, if you have no further use of me, Master Fowl, I'll be on my way," Mulch said as he began to slowly back out of the room.
"Oh no, you don't," Artemis said. Juliet grabbed Mulch, and he knew he wasn't getting away. "I have a few questions to-"
Artemis was interrupted as two teenagers in long black robes appeared out of thin air.
"Honestly Harry, your wand movements were all wrong!" said the female. "And your pronunciation was dreadful!"
"Well, let's think," the male retorted. "Could that possibly be because I'm not a Latin scholar like you?"
"How did you even make it to Advanced Charms?" the female wondered. "I can't imagine you scoring anything above 'Poor' on OWLs!"
"Um, Hermione?" the male said, noticing where they were at for the first time.
"What?" She looked around and saw the three people staring at them. "Oh, Professor Flitwick's not going to like this at all."
So, what do you think? Future chapters will be longer... Please review! -Luna