Book of Stars- Waiting for a sign.
By: BlackAmoria
Disclaimer: Same as always. Blah. I don't own anything, but if someone would help me steal if we'll share fifty-fifty. Good plan?
Kyo: Oh god. I feel so special right now, butterflies in my stomach. But did my story really make you cry? If so…..I don't know whether to be sorry about making you cry…or feel elated because I made someone cry. Gods. Mwah! I love you already. Such great reviews.
XxSwtDreamerxX1: Thank you! You're comment made me feel like flying. I'm happy that you actually look forward to my story. Its feels so good. Oh crap. I really am a total review whore. .
Xyjiah: Ahhh! Thank you, for reviewing and also for getting back on track. And I'm glad to know that my very uninspired chapter was good after all.
Shierri: Ahh. Sorry. I guess I got a little occupied with school, so here's a chapter. Best I could come up with. Thanks for the encouragement.
And about pairings, I really have no clue. I just love them all. Isn't everyone in the F4 so delicious?
And the truth is all my chapters write themselves out. Nothing is planned, my brain works in a weird way so things just come out. I didn't even plan the previous chapter to be a Rui chapter. I'm a die-hard T/T fan so please, if I can't help putting Tsukasa in the spotlight, don't hate me.
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She twisted in her bed, beads of cold sweat forming on her forehead as her lips kept moving rhythmically to a familiar name. Her hand twitched and reached out ever so slightly as her forehead wrinkled in worry.
"Come back here!" The voice yelled and she could hear footsteps slowly trailing after a younger version of herself running along the shore of a beach, laughing. She ran into the water, the waves crashing against her as the silhouette of a boy hugged her form behind lifting her up as they both got wet.
The shadow of their form kissing slowly faded away as she saw herself laughing, her hair covered with spaghetti while she draped her arms around the same person's neck, leaning her head down to kiss him.
And once again, the warmth that scene gave her melted away when she saw herself running down a busy street, pushing pass bystanders a she ran towards a little bench in some park, holding her breath when she saw the back of that same boy facing her and he slowly turned around….
The next image was of a car sliding off a cliff, the piercing scream of a girl could be heard and the car kept falling….
And falling…..
Until……
"TSUKUSHI! Please Tsukushi!"
She saw her body on a stretcher, doctors and nurses pushing her into an ER as a crying man held onto her hand, his faced blurred by the hospital lights.
She woke up, her body sweaty and her forehead hot as she ran a tired hand through her hair as she closed her eyes and tried to calm her breathing. Every second her eyes were closed, her heart raced, mentally, she could still hear his words; physically, he could fell the wet tears hitting her hands and he tenderly held onto it. And as the words, raced through her brain, the first signs of an aching headache appeared; she clutched her head, willing the pain to go away, willing the guy in her dreams to leave.
So he left and with him, the pounding headache vanished. What was left of Tsukushi's dream was only the distant memory of the car accident, the piercing cries and the blinking ER lights. Everything else had floated away, distant, lonely, and yet to be revealed.
Tsukushi sat in her bed, her back against the wall as she stared at the wall, her eyes empty. The seconds ticked away and soon the minutes did, and when she finally came to, the sun was already rising. Getting out of bed, Tsukushi slowly marched towards the little bookshelf and reaching for the book when she accidentally bumped into a shelf, causing an old picture frame to fall to the ground. The glass shattered and Tsukushi bended down to pick up the sharp pieces of broken glass when she caught sight of a piece of paper behind the frame.
The glass forgotten, she reached her hand out to grab the folded piece of paper and her features softened at the sight of what she saw. The paper, wrinkled and folded, held the picture of an old house. Under the picture, wrote:
I'll wait here.
Her eyebrows knitted together in confusion and she stared blankly at the piece of paper again before picking herself up off the floor and folding the paper back into place, throwing it into her purse.
She got ready, rubbing her eyes as she wearily trudged out of the apartment, she got into her car and droved away. As her car moved farther and farther away from the small apartment, a figure walked form across the street. Their eyes red and puffy, sign of tears and the woman clung her coat closer to her body, and she bit her lip watching the car speed away.
"I won't let you win, not anymore."
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Silence reigned over the young couple as the quietly ate their dinner, neither looking at each other, they were a dream, young, beautiful, rich, and in love. Was it really true? Nah. Rich, they were, beautiful, that couldn't be denied, but love? Love was far form the kind of relationship they held.
There was no doubt that the young woman was in love with the boy, ever since she had laid eyes on him, but that feeling was not returned for throughout their marriage, he had always been aloof, careless, and she didn't mind. She only wanted them to be together, everyone said that their love would grow overtime. But that was far form the truth.
Sadly, through the years, no matter how hard she tried the pieces of their marriage--so carefully taped and glued together by the parents--were falling apart. And why? Because of the only woman he would love and ever love. But Shigeru wouldn't accept that.
Why didn't he love her? Couldn't he see the pain in her eyes when he would shrug her off and walk away or when she would wake him up in the middle of the night, trying to calm his nerves as he repeatedly called her Tsukushi.
She could remember their wedding night, how she had kissed him, tentatively, shyly, and he had pushed her away and left the room. The love she tried to offer him was never enough and as their days together grew, both of their parents had asked for a baby but he shrugged the matter off, declaring that he couldn't have a baby with the woman he didn't love. A woman he couldn't see his future with.
So as resentment ran through her body, she slammed the fork on the table, surprising her careless husband, making him look up at her over his lab-top. "What's wrong?" The question sounded more annoyed than concerned but through the years and the numerous rejections, she knew that was all she could get out of him.
She stood up, walking over to his side of the long table, and grabbing his shirt, pulling him into a kiss only to be pushed away. Shigeru couldn't control her tears anymore, so she slapped him, "What the hell do you want from me? I have tried everything! I have tried…"
She broke down, falling to her knees as Tsukasa stared at her, his eyes cold and unfeeling, but they softened and he kneeled down next to the petite figure. "I'm sorry. We both knew from the beginning that this wouldn't work out. I shouldn't have been selfish."
Then he stood up, patting her head slightly and left. "Is that all you could offer me? Your regret? Your pity? Is that all you could offer me after I wasted my life on you? After you deliberately vowed to god that you would love me, "until death do us part", is that all the shit you can offer?"
He stopped, turning to face her, a vein on his forehead as he clenched his fists and growled a small "yes" through his teeth. Then as quickly as the conversation had occurred, it had disappeared, her wishing that it never happened and him not caring enough to bother with her childish needs.
The family would stay together, no matter how fake the marriage, no matter a loveless both felt, no matter how many tears were shed, life would go on. And whoever said you couldn't buy happiness with money? That person was a shit.
Life goes on and the sun rose every morning and set every evening, but no one cared anymore. No one bothered to pay attention.
As said before, no matters how many fuck ups, life goes on and everyone has to deal with it. So why couldn't Shigeru cope? Was it her loveless marriage? Was it Tsukasa's rejection or was it Tsukushi's sudden appearance? She went with the latter, no matter how supporting she tried to be, or how supporting she once was, the realization of Tsukasa's love for Tsukushi had finally dawned her. She could stand it if he hated her, if he didn't care about her. But loving another woman? She couldn't accept that.
So she had to fix her problems, the smart way or the stupid way, so again, she chose the latter. Stupid or smart, she only wanted to solve the problem, the tiniest glitch in her almost perfect marriage.
And that was Makino Tsukushi.
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Her light footsteps, tapping the floor and she twisted and turned, dancing amongst her admirers, but she didn't notice the stares. What she had notice was the way the music would blend with her footsteps and that was all that mattered at the moment.
The music faded away and she shook the musician's hand, giving him a small smile as he repeatedly thanked her, the man then collected his money and was gone, still bidding her thank you. She watched him turn away, and she told walked in the opposite direction, only to collide with a tall man and his girlfriend.
Blushing, she mumbled a soft sorry before continuing her footsteps, hurriedly walking away when she felt someone's gaze on her. He looked familiar, but she couldn't recall anything abut him, he was probably apart of the audience at one of her concerts or maybe he was part of the elite society that she would often acquaint with, all thanks to her pesky agent.
Though it didn't matter, it bothered her that she could hardly remember anyone she had met, the faces maybe, but never names. What was wrong with her? She didn't know, but all signs were pointing to amnesiac, chuckling slightly to herself, she continued her walking on the path, hugging her sweater to her body.
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"Akira? Are you ok, sweetheart?"
He shook his head, why bother dreaming when she was already so far away? He didn't know but it felt good, just thinking about her. Just that alone felt good, then what was the harm? He was the only one who could be with her then why did he hesitate.
Rui had Shizuka and Tsukasa had Shigeru, then why was he still so hesitant on being with her? He loved her, he knew that much but was he ready? He didn't know.
So he kissed his date and walked away, vowing to not look back, vowing to forget it and walk away, vowing to forget about her. He knew that within the few seconds of alone time he got everyday, that face would come back to haunt him. Akira knew that within those few seconds, he would fall in love all over again and he knew that within those few seconds, he would continue wondering aimlessly, hoping for a miracle.
Hoping for some kind of sign, hoping for her to love him.
And the sun faded away, the moon taking over, as Shigeru stared silently out of the mansion's window, waiting for her husband while Tsukasa slaved away in the office, keen on going home. Rui, Rui was sleeping, Shizuka lying next to him, Soujirou with his escapades, Akira with his women, and Tsukushi skipping home.
The sun would rise tomorrow and the routine would continue, what the hell is everyone waiting for then? The answer was, a sign. A sign to pick up their story and continuing where each left off.
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I'm sorry if this was a load of crap. It seems to be going nowhere, just when I think something exciting is about to happen. Ugh. I hate this story. Anyone have any ideas I can throw in here to make it worth the time reading? Review!