I'm back sooner than I thought I'd be! Hooray for me! As for you people who feel Akane is being cruel to Ranma, I'll get to that. It may be a little extreme, but Akane never was one to go easy on Ranma. Speaking of Ranma, I still don't own it. If I owned it I would have given both the anime and manga series more closure. And Ryoga would've ended up with Ukyo. Period. On with the story. I like my jubjub.

"Did you hear that, Shaotome? My little girl finally admided she likesh your son. Finally our two school will become uniteded!" Soun was obviously a little tipsy from sake.

"After Ranma and Akane produce an heir, my wife will have to asept that her son is a manly man! I'll be able to keep my intestines and life in one pieces!" Genma, who was surprisingly human at the time, was seemingly more intoxicated than his friend.

"All I have to worry about is Nabiki now..." Soun started to turn on the waterfalls, "All my little girls are leaving me! I knew the day would come, but I never thunk it would all happen so fasht!"

Genma tried to reassure his friend, "There there Tendo. Let's drink some more in the tea room and settle your nerves over a nice game of shougi!" With that, the two drunken fathers stumbled their way to the house.

"Kasumi, what did our dad mean by 'all my little girls'? And why were they celebrating so much over a cooking competition?" Akane had a confused look on her face, but Ranma was a little quicker.

"You didn't wear that ring for the competition! It all makes sense now! Your ring, the blushing, the fumbling for words, the drunken fathers...you got engaged, didn't you!" Ranma seemed excited at his conclusion, which made Kasumi blush even more.

"Yes, Dr. Tofu proposed to me on stage as I accepted my award. He told me he acted so goofy around me all the time because he wanted to ask, but never got up the courage," Kasumi practically whispered. "He had to give himself a mild sedative so he wouldn't go berserk again."

Akane slowly processed this information, then glomped onto her sister. "I'm sooooooo happy for the two of you! I knew it was just a matter of time! Congratulations!"

Ranma got up from his spot on the ground to give Kasumi a hug too. "I didn't think he had it in him! If he was this goofy just trying to ask, I don't want to be around for he wedding night!" This caused Kasumi to gently slap Ranma on the cheek. "It's not my fault! Blame Akane, she's the one who did this to me!"

Kasumi spoke gently, as always, "Even so, what me and my husband do on our wedding night is..." her blush reaching new shades of red, "well, none of your business. Akane, why are you doing this to poor Ranma? I don't think anything he would do can warrant this, right?"

"You weren't here earlier this morning!" Akane started to get defensive. "The old letch decided to pull off a panty raid. Ranma caught him and wanted to teach him a lesson. He doused the new collection with kerosene and torched it!"

"But I'm always doing that! It works! The freak goes away for a few days all depressed and comes back acting like it ever happened! I don't know what you're complaining about. I did you a favor by getting rid of him and this is how you repay me? A thank-you make out session would be much when will I lear..." Ranma finally did it. He admitted he would've enjoyed kissing Akane. And in the process, earned a slap to the cheek.

"The collection was my entire supply of underwear!" Akane was screaming. Calmly she added, "Not to mention about half of Shampoo's."

"Whoa, check out the mood swing...I wonder if it's her time of the DAY WHERE we eat dinner! I was about to ask out loud if Akane was having her girlie time. I just did that, didn't I? I'm really not too bright, am I? Even I know it's very rude to ask if a girl is having her, ummmmmmm, cycle. Besides, I already know the answer to that. I know she is. Well, at least she can't kill me any more than she's already going to. It's hard to kill something after it's already dead. Kinda like kicking an unconscious Happosai. It's just not gratifying. Well Akane, Kasumi, I give you permission to slap, mallet, kick, or just plain beat me for asking such a rude question. Maybe I'll get lucky and you'll rewire my brain instead of taking Akane's antidote, which I'm sure is going to be toxic. Shut up brain! You must be suicidal! You know how sensitive Akane is about her cooking! But it's a good thing you have such strong survival instincts. Akane's cooking may not kill the mind, but it does lots of damage to the body. Without the body, you have no reason to work...I said shut up! You must be trying to get me killed!" Ranma gave his head a good thwap. "Owwwwww. That'll teach you! No it won't. I'm not hitting me...you...my head again!"

Akane and Kasumi just stared at the pig-tailed martial artist in awe. Ranma kept arguing with himself before Akane realized what he had said. 'How did he know I'm having my period? Only one way to find out.' "Hey Ranma, before me and Kasumi slap you for being so rude, how do you know I'm going through...that?"

Ranma released the death grip on his head. "Well, after living here for more than two years with three women, my female side has kinda gotten in synch with the three of you. I've also realized your behavior changes. Nabiki tends to be more inflexible with her bargaining, Kasumi actually speaks her mind, and you try to cook something. That's when me and Pop try to run away...I mean go on a training trip! We don't like being screwed over by Nabiki or poisoned by your food."

'Why that nasty little...! Wait...his female body is in synch with me and my sisters'? That means...' Akane decided to ask Ranma a question she knew would make Ranma squirm. "Hey Ranma. You said your female form is 'in synch' with ours, right? What does that mean exactly?" Akane knew it was wrong to ask, but she just liked making Ranma uncomfortable. Besides, he asked the same thing practically. Well, he didn't mean to but he thought it! That's just as bad, right? Akane started to almost regret asking.

"Well, when the old ghoul hit the cat's tongue pressure point, I was stuck as a girl. I noticed something was very very wrong with me going into the second day, when I was taking a cold shower. I asked Dr Tofu what was wrong, and he explained...things...to me. Damn father never explained ANY of that stuff. If he did, I would've been a lot less embarrassed about it. Anyway, when I got home, all I could find was an empty box of...supplies. I still can't call them by name! I asked Kasumi to get some more and to keep it a secret from everyone, especially my dad. Since then, I've been paranoid around cold water during that section of the 'glandular timeline'." Ranma still couldn't bring himself to call it by the normal name. He was a guy, after all. Guys weren't supposed to have periods, so he couldn't call it that. All it is is a defect with HIS body.

'Well, if he uses his female form to mooch free food off of vendors, it's only fair he gets all the added strains that go along with it.' Akane couldn't feel sorry for Ranma. Neither could Kasumi, who decided to leave the two little lovebirds alone.

"I'm going to go and start on dinner now. Dr. Tofu is coming over to announce our engagement to the whole family. Have fun, you two! And Akane, I really think you've tortured Ranma enough. I know he burned your underwear, but we can always get more." With that, Kasumi exited the dojo.

There, all done for now. Thanks to all the reviewers! I'll update again when I get around to it. If not soon, then probably in a month or so. It all depends on when I feel inspired again or come up with something good. I'm not sure if we'll see P-chan or not. Please R&R!

P.S. I JUST had an idea for our little piglet. We will see him after all, and Akane WILL get revenge. Ryoga will wish for just a mallet to the cranium after Akane's all done. Hee hee.