Part II

Friday

November 5, 2004

Key West, FL

When Harm and I leave Dulles this morning for an investigation to NAS Key West, it's pouring, gray and dreary, and I have a mood to match, but only because it's zero dark early and I haven't had any breakfast, and I'm not likely to since we didn't have time to stop for food before the flight. Harm and I don't speak much on the plane. He busies himself with some case files and munches on a granola bar, and he offers me one but there's no way one of those things is going to touch my lips. I need bacon; I need sausage; I need eggs! My mouth waters as I think of a double-meat, egg and cheese Croissanwich from Burger King.

I try to get my mind off the lack of food and spend most of the flight nursing a terrible cup of coffee and stealing little glances at Harm while he's working. I close my eyes and think back to that day...it was a Thursday, the night we first talked about "stuff." Simple concept really, but one we had never really contemplated in all our years of friendship, now that I think about it. Harm and I, for all the talking we did, never really communicated before. Oh we've talked all right, but we're both lawyers, it's what we do, we're masters of word play and mind games. But that wasn't working too well for us; it was obviously time for something different.

That night....that Thursday night, we broke the pattern. We just talked...about ice cream and patty melts and guitars and music and...fluffy pillows. I smile at the thought. We talked for an hour about nothing and everything, just stuff. There is an unspoken agreement between us – no talk about us and them and work, unless we're working on a case together. Everything else is fair game. That way we have no excuses.

That night we hung up the phone and I settled into the best sleep I ever had. I've had trouble sleeping all my adult life and now, I actually look forward to going to sleep. There are no more nightmares, no more angry faces and hateful words. And my dreams! Who knew a dream could be so good you wouldn't want to wake up from it, except to try to make it come true. We talk every night, sometimes for just a few minutes, sometimes for hours. But we both feel the need to connect, and it feels so good. I'm a much happier person as a result. Things still get me down and I still have problems, still see Dr. McCool, but I have a much more positive attitude. And a lot of that has to do with Harm. With stuff.

Ah, speaking of peaceful dreams, we step off the plane and like magic we're thrust into what I can only describe as paradise. I take a deep breath as I deplane and take in my surroundings. The sun is shining, it's 84 degrees in November, people are smiling....remind me again why I live in Washington? I had wondered why Harm and I were traveling on a Friday, but it ceased to matter once I got my first view of the clear water and white sandy beach.

We grab a rental car and make our way to the hotel...well, a bed and breakfast actually, and I stare, wide-eyed as we're led to our adjoining rooms. We let ourselves in with our respective card keys.

"HARM!"

Harm comes barreling into my room like a house on fire. "What, Mac?" he asks as he surveys the area, and satisfied that he finds no menacing intruder, he lets out a breath, "Where is it? I'll kill it for you," he offers.

"Kill what?" I ask in confusion.

"The bug, Mac. Where is it? I can't believe you need me to do it for you, but I will. Where is it?"

I giggle at him. How cute is he, offering to kill a bug for me? "There is no bug, Harm. I was just...I can't believe how gorgeous this room is! You have to admit these aren't standard Navy fare..." I eye him suspiciously, "Speaking of which, who'd you have to kill for this?"

Harm blinks and shakes his head, hands on his hips. "Okay, let me get this straight. You scream bloody murder and scare me half to death because you love your room?"

"I think you're overreacting, Harm. I was just being...enthusiastic." I reasoned.

He smirks at me. "I'm glad you like it." I give him the eye and he shrugs his shoulders, "So what, I wanted something decent for a change. Besides, a lot of hotel rooms are booked because of the air show this weekend."

The light bulb in my head goes on and I give him a knowing look, waving a finger at him. "Hmmm, don't tell me. Blue Angels, right? No wonder you volunteered us for this assignment."

"I did not," he shot back, eyebrows furrowed in indignation. "It's just a coincidence," he added.

"Uh huh." I plop down onto the bed and run my fingers down the over-the-bed canopy net. "It's too nice here. Wood floors, the tub is huge!" I sigh with contentment and prop my head on my hand. "Do we have to work? Can't we just say we got lost or something?" I ask hopefully.

"Believe me, there's nothing I'd like better. But we could take our time, you know, have trouble locating a witness or two," he suggests.

"Sounds like a plan," I agree with a conspiratorial smile.

Gathering his thoughts, Harm walks to the door and turns to leave. "Well, let's take a few minutes to freshen up. We still have to get over to the base and check in, maybe get a couple of interviews under our belts. I told Captain Bernard we would meet him for dinner later. He suggested a nice seafood restaurant nearby."

Ten minutes later we were back on the road. It didn't take us long to get to NAS, where we spent a good part of the day meeting people and interviewing others. Some of the meetings would have to wait until Monday, but I wasn't going to argue. Harm and I headed back to the hotel with only an hour to spare before our dinner with the Captain. There's no way I was planning on wearing my uniform to dinner, but I hadn't thought to pack one, so I left Harm in his room and ran to one of the local shops in search of a dress. Luckily I got one of the saleswomen to help me find something that was simple and elegant, but not too dressy. She knew exactly what I needed and for that I was grateful. She also sent me a few doors down for a nice pair of dressy sandals to go with it...you can never have too many pairs of shoes.

I knock on Harm's door and take the time to turn around to get a better look at the beautiful landscape while I'm waiting. I'm so mesmerized I don't hear the door open and when I turn back around I see Harm standing in the doorway, watching me. He's looking at me with an expression I haven't seen much. I'm not quite sure what to make of it. Suddenly I feel a little self-conscious.

I twist to check both sides of my dress. "What, did I forget to cut a tag off?" I ask.

"Uh, no Mac, you look...fine. New dress?"

I decide to let him in on my little secret. "Yeah, don't tell the Captain, but I'm wearing it off the rack...literally. You don't think it's too much, do you? The saleswoman said this would be perfect."

"Yeah, it's perfect, I mean, you look great," he says as he takes the opportunity to nonchalantly observe me from head to toe. He's already seen me from behind. "Nice shoes."

"Thanks, they're not exactly what I would have picked out, but now that I have them on, well..." Why I'm even talking to Harm about my shoes I have no idea, other than the fact that I'm nervous, and he looks...but then he always looks...one day I'm going to find the perfect word to describe it, but for now I decide to just take the time and enjoy the view.

There's something about the way he's looking at me that gives me a sudden thrill of excitement.

"Ready?" he asks.

"Are we walking?" I ask. His eyes are holding me captive.

"We might as well; it's just down the street," he answers as he leads me onto the porch and closes the door behind us. He takes my hand in the crook of his arm, and we walk to the restaurant, making small talk. My three-inch heels give me an advantage, and I've closed the gap in height by a small margin. At this height, I can smell the cologne he has on, and I find myself leaning closer just to get a better whiff. I hope he thinks I'm leaning in to hear him better over the street noise and doesn't notice that I'm drowning in his scent.

Dinner was nice. Captain Bernard brought his wife along so we wouldn't have to spend the whole time talking about the case. We talked about the history of the base and tourism, and kids (they have three of varying ages) and politics and deployments. And of course, flying. I was pleasantly satisfied with the evening: the meal was great, and of course the company wasn't half bad. We leave after several hours and say our goodbyes, and take a leisurely walk back to the hotel, not talking but content to take in the atmosphere of people milling about and listening to the ocean lapping on the shore, enjoying the light breeze.

Finally we made it back to our rooms, and Harm and I look at each other. We just stand there, not moving, not talking. Then Harm breaks the silence. "That was a nice time, wasn't it?" he asks.

"Yeah, I wasn't really expecting to enjoy it so much, but it was nice to get out and meet new people. I don't get to do that often."

"I worried about you when they started talking about their kids. Are you okay?"

"I can't get upset and cry every time I see someone with a child, Harm. I'm still hurting, but I'll be okay." I take let out a deep breath and smile up at him. "You know what they say, 'fake it 'til you make it.'"

"We should do this again. I mean, maybe you and I should go out more often, you know, if you wanted to, that is."

His shy attempt at asking me out surprises me. Or maybe he really isn't asking me out, I think to myself....and I hesitate, running the words over again in my mind to make sure that's really what it is. But I can see my hesitancy disappoints him. I can almost see him shut down before my eyes.

"We don't have to Mac, it was just an idea. I'll let you go, it's getting late."

I put my hand on his arm and my eyes search his. I have to ask, just so there are no more misunderstandings between us. "Are you asking me out on a date?"

Harm looks at me, smiling, then looks down at his shoes and back up at me. "Yeah, I am. Would you go out with me, Mac?"

"I'd like that." I lift up on my toes and kiss him on the cheek. Our lips are so close and they're so inviting, and his scent is invading my senses. I linger a little longer than I should and slowly pull away.

Harm straightens and reverts back to his confident self. "I'll see you in the morning for breakfast. How about 0700? I got us special passes for the air show but we have to get there early."

"0700 it is. Night, Harm." I leave him standing at my door and hear him walk away when I click the bolt on the door. I stand with my back to the door, leaning up against it for support. I smile, then giggle, then take a big breath and let it out. HARM ASKED ME OUT! Oh, I don't know what to do; I don't know what to feel. I'm scared, I'm so excited; my heart is pounding. I replay the words over and over in my head. I don't know how I'm going to be able to sleep tonight, and I think maybe a nice hot bath will settle me down.

I walk into the bathroom and turn on the faucet, drizzling a little bit of complimentary bubble bath into the water and go back to the bedroom to get myself out of my dress. There's only one problem...the zipper is stuck. I try several times, contorting my arms in several different ways to try and get the right kind of grip on the zipper, to no avail. Great, now what do I do? Sitting on the bed, I ponder my options. I can't squeeze out of it, so that's out of the question. I try lying on my stomach and stretch my arms behind my back...that doesn't work. I come to the conclusion there's only one thing I can do. Call Harm. Wait until I try to explain this.

I call Harm's cell phone and he answers on the second ring. "Rabb."

"You're not going to believe this," I start.

He chuckles and says, "You miss me already?"

"Oh, terribly," I coo into the phone. "Seriously, Harm, I need you to help me with something."

"Sure, what is it, Mac?" he asks.

"Can you come over? I need you to undo me."

Silence.

"Harm?"

"Yeah, I'm here," he said distractedly.

"Just come over, okay?"

More silence. But the next thing I know there is a knock on the door. I open it up to see Harm standing with the phone still to his ear and a deer-like look on his face.

I grab his arm and drag him inside, closing the door behind him. "Don't panic, Harm. I just need you to unzip me."

"Why?"

"Uh, because I can't do it myself?"

That seems to make sense to him. "Okay."

I turn around and bare my back to him and pull my hair aside so he can get a full view. "Can you see anything stuck in there? The thing won't budge. I've tried everything short of ripping it off me, but it cost me an arm and a leg so I'd rather not go there."

Examining my back from a distance, he asks, "How did you get it zipped up?"

"They did it at the store, remember? I wore it out. They didn't have any problem zipping it up." I explained.

"I don't see anything but it's too dark here. Why don't we move to an area where there's better light?" he suggested.

I quickly run to the bathroom and turn off the faucet. This could take a while and I don't want the tub to overflow. When I came back, Harm had turned on the bedside lamp and is sitting on the edge of the bed. He motions for me to turn around and grabs me by the waist, pulling me in for a closer look. But that isn't helping, and unconsciously he sets me on his lap and bends me forward, following right behind so he can shed maximum light on the zipper.

And then I realize I'm sitting on Harm's lap, I'm bent over, and he's got his hands slowly moving over my back. Suddenly it's getting a little warm in here. Harm runs his fingers gently on both sides of the zipper the length of my back, looking for imperfections or a tooth that is out of alignment. Then he reaches up and runs his fingers under the edge of my dress, pulling it forward so he can get a better look.

"I don't see anything, Mac. Maybe there's a piece of fiber caught on the inside that I can't see. Here. Let me try this one more time." He slowly nudges the zipper and it doesn't budge, but he yanks it, and it catches for a split second, but then quickly, before we know what's happening, I'm unzipped down to my waist, and he gasps when he realizes I don't have anything on underneath, and that my breasts are partially exposed. Suddenly the heat kicks up another notch.

I can tell Harm is embarrassed and all he wants to do is jump up and escape, but there is the little problem of me bent over, sitting on his lap, straddling his legs – not a position to be extricated from easily. I know what I'm thinking; I can only imagine what he's thinking.

Trying to make light of the awkward situation, Harm says, "Wow, if I'd known it would be this easy to get you out of a dress I'd have done it sooner."

"Wasn't it Kate who said you had the fastest fingers in the Navy? Now I know why."

We both share a laugh and awkward moment number 620 falls by the wayside. Harm reaches for the robe that is sitting on the edge of the bed and covers me.

"Thanks." I say in appreciation as I close the robe around me. I'd reach up and kiss him again, but if I do I'll lose all control.

Harm stands up and walks to the door. "Night, Mac."

"Night, Harm."

He walks out and turns back to give me a smile, and I return it. I want so much more. I close the door. Maybe one day.