You'll never guess how long this has been sat waiting for me to post, shame on me. Bad Milkshake! smacks hand Still, it's here now, better late than never, ne?

Disclaimer: It's depressing how little stuff I actually do own.

Scroll Three – Confusing Crosswords

A, blank, S, blank, S, blank, A, blank, T Aide reforms Satanists. Aide reforms Satanists? Politicians? God, no. They never reform.' Kagome chewed on the end of her biro, deep in thought and completely oblivious to the not-so-muted argument taking place over her head. However the rest of the patrons of the café they'd relocated to didn't have the luxury of blissful oblivion and so were treated to the full monty.

You just had to piss him off, didn't you?! Do you derive pleasure from getting your ass kicked and plastic splinters lodged in your shoulder?!

Miroku's outburst was met with a glare from Inuyasha that could have curdled milk and an attempted punch just to illustrate his displeasure. An attempted punch because Sango had just twisted his arm pointedly, thus saving Miroku from obtaining yet more bruises for his collection. The hanyou briefly entertained the idea of taking on both his friends but then realised he probably wouldn't have any friends afterwards if he did that. So he settled for grumbling under his breath instead.

Reformed Satanists? HmmOw! Jesus bitch, can't you be a bit more gentle?! Inuyasha's grumbling abruptly turned into an outraged yell as Sango yanked out another plastic splinter from his shoulder.

Excuse me?! You're one who got into a fight with Kouga surrounded by heaps of plastic cutlery! Sango snapped back, pulling the next splinter out with a little more force than was actually required. It's your own fault you have pieces of plastic spoons lodged in your shoulder. She cringed. And now you're making me sound like my Mum.Yeah but - Silence greeted Kagome's triumphant exclamation. I'm so stupid, it was right there in front of me! what's right in front of you? Inuyasha titled his head quizzically at her.

Miroku leaned over, gaze travelling down to Kagome chest. The man of your dreams? She stiffened before clamping an arm across her chest and slapping him across the face.

Sleazy hentai. Sango muttered.

No, not the man of my dreams, the answer to the crossword clue. Kagome shot the appropriately chastised Miroku a look and started to write in the answer.

What? The answer is hentai? Inuyasha asked, starting to get a bit confused now.

Sango gave the offending puzzle a look she normally reserved for Miroku at his most perverted. What kind of crossword would have that as one of the answers?If that's the answer, what on earth is the clue?! Inuyasha asked, peering over Kagome shoulder to read the clue. Aide reforms Satanists'? How did you get hentai from that? Kagome sighed and put her head in her hands. And this is the guy I'm supposed to guide to glory? God help me.

It wasn't until she became aware of the pressing silence that she figured she'd said that bit out loud. Ooh, bad Kagome. Bad, bad. Explain that one away.'

Great. They probably already think I'm mad, claiming to be from Heaven. Now they going to think I'm stark raving loony!' Why is it that whenever you want a hole to open up and swallow you they never listen? (It's a good job they listen when you don't want them open up and swallow you. Otherwise it could get a bit inconvenient to be suddenly engulfed right in the middle of doing something. I'm sorry. Jimmy can't come to school today because the ground swallowed him in the middle of breakfast. Like the teacher's gonna believe that. Poor Jimmy would probably end up with extra homework or something. But I digress.)

You're supposed to be guiding Inuyasha to glory?! Miroku managed to ask before he collapsed into laughter. Have fun trying that! Sango didn't even bother to comment but clutched weakly at Miroku as she giggled helplessly.

And just what is so funny about that? Inuyasha inquired icily, raising an eyebrow in a manner that promised plenty of pain in fairly short order.

Miroku hastily cleared his throat, unwilling loose any vital limbs just yet, while Sango wiped the tears from her eyes. Absolutely nothing at all. Inuyasha remained unconvinced but didn't pursue the matter further in favour of tackling his strawberry milkshake.

So, you were serious? About the guiding and the glory and Inuyasha being the one? Miroku asked after a while, slurping the last remaining drops of his milkshake up with his straw.

Kagome blinked. You believe me? You're not secretly thinking I'm as mad as the loopy old man who lives in the apartment across the hall from me?He the one who always wears purple, furry slippers and calls everyone Irene? Inuyasha wanted to know.

I know him! Sango exclaimed and shuddered. He tried to chat me up the other day at the bus-stop.

Miroku grinned and, affecting the quivering voice of an old man, said, Come here often, Irene? He would have been bruise-less if he had just stopped there and not leered at Sango. As it was he now sported a rather fetching handprint on his cheek.

You'd think he'd have a better chat up line after all those years, ne? Miroku shook his head. That one is so overused.

There was an astounded silence from the two girls. As if that would make it any better! I mean, those slippers of his are enough to turn anyone off and he's so old, not to mention there's his whole Irene complex. Sango pointed out.

It's when he starts calling me Irene that gets me. Hello? My brother is the one who looks like a girl, not me! Inuyasha huffed indignantly and then paused in thought. Come to think of it, he never calls Sesshoumaru Irene. It's always Mr Sesshoumaru, sir'.

Miroku nodded wisely. That's because he's too scared of your brother to call him Irene.So why isn't he scared of me?Because he knows you're not as strong as your brother. Miroku replied instantly and without thinking. Then, as he hid behind Sango. Please don't hit me.

Inuyasha eyed him and then shook his head. So! What we were talking about before the Irene guy? Sango asked brightly, effectively changing the topic before yet another fight broke out.

About my guiding Inuyasha to glory. Kagome said quietly, uncomfortably aware of the annoyed or curious stares of the other customers. It's a task I was set by the Heavenly Host. Well actually all they said was I had to guide someone to the path of glory and that I'd know who when I saw him. she paused and eyed Inuyasha. Which is why I'm really hoping I'm not wrong. Do you know how many men there are on this planet?! It took me long enough to find you!So, you're saying, Inuyasha mused, I'm going to be famous or something? Cool!

Kagome frowned; she hadn't even been told what kind of glory she was supposed to be guiding Inuyasha to. It could be world-famous-with-lots-of-money-type glory, or it could be just personal glory. Heck, it could be anything! guess so.Wait, hang on a moment. Inuyasha held up his hand, brows drawn together in a puzzled frown. If you really are an angel, where are your wings and your halo?

Kagome sighed, doodling round the edge of her crossword puzzle. It's part of the task, I have to do it as a human, hence the going to school with you and such. I got a memo about a week after I'd started searching. Stupid internal mail, always takes ages to get to the next department. She looked up at the three curious faces that were regarding her over their empty glasses. You probably don't believe me without any proof, ne?

Miroku blinked and shook his head. Course we believe you. Stranger things have happened. He said breezily.

Yeah, like Inuyasha actually having enough money to pay for his milkshake. Sango grumbled as the waitress came over with the bill and once again Inuyasha gave her the puppy-dog eyes treatment. I can remember a time when you used to buy other people things, not the other way round.

The silver-haired hanyou sighed. Yeah, but that was before Sesshoumaru went vegetarian. Now there's nothing edible in the whole house! I have to keep on buying real food. Sorta puts a dent in your wallet.

They paid the waitress and began gathering their coats and bags together. By the way, what was the answer to that crossword clue? Inuyasha asked as they went out the door.

sniggers A veggie Sesshoumaru. He was originally going to be on a diet but I was writting some of the next chapter and came up with the idea of him going veggie. It just tickled my funny bone.

Press the button, go on, press it. And if you are really bored you could always try and figure out the answer to the crossword clue, answers on a postcard, please. Of course if it really bugs you I'll tell you the answer next chapter.