Hi everybody! Sky Fire Dragon back again! Um, NORMALLY, there's no telling how soon updates will be, but I've got almost a whole day of blissful nothingness ahead of me(at least until parents get up and put me to work) and I'm also going on a trip soon and will b gone for like, 3 wks...and I know I'll be lazy when I get back, so....this is for those of you who DO actually want to continue reading. And let me go on record to say that it annoys me whenever author notes and replies to the reviews goes on longer than the actual fic, but I'm doing it anyway. sighs Go figure... so, for those of you who don't care what I have to say to everyone, skip ahead to the story like you were going to anyway. the rest of you sit down and be comfortable because I have a lot to say....(as usual...)
Yami-AJ Yu-Yu-IncuCaptor Lol. No, Botan gets to be someone much better (for her).
Baka Bahamut Scuzi? Whose story is this? I can do whatever I want in it. Hard concept? No. In my defense(even though I really don't care what you think on this matter) this story was not originally written to go on ffnet. I wrote it for my friend to make her laugh during class, so it's not of the highest caliber in the beginning. It gets better. And FYI, Kuwabara isn't going to be a main character in this one, he's here b/c I need him there later on for some character conflicts I have in mind. It's not that I dislike Kuwabara, I admire him, honestly. But it's so much fun to make fun of him. I also have difficulty writing about him in a positive sense because he's just a difficult character for me to write about. I'm sorry if you were offended, but I really don't care. This is MY story, and it's really going to be trivial later on. Your awfully protective of a character who isn't even REAL. So, sorry to have offended you, but I'm not going to change my plans for later chapters because of a 4 sentence review. Sorry.
Oscar that's what I thought too! : D
Luna Stargazer Love your name. Yeah, I agree it's hard to find original material on this site. I will say Anica106 and I are both trying to remedy that, at least somewhat. She's succeeding better than I am. But there's a reason this is Humor; I'm not trying to be completely original in this one, it's purely for entertainment, with hopefully some original character development. And the reason for choosing Romeo and Juliet instead of something like Hamlet is b/c I don't like Shakespeare (sorry, but true) and no one has made me read Hamlet yet, so how can I do a fic based on it? And I have seen other Romeo and Juliet ones out there, but I didn't find any I really considered good. If you can remember the title of the one you read, I'd love to read it. So, read if you like, if not....well, I still like your name! : D
The wind spirit YAY! I do too, actually, provided it's well done. But, I'm sorry to say, this isn't. dodges flying object It will have lots of H/K moments b/c I love those charac's. Nothing romantic though, they're just friends. And guess what? You guessed right! Only...not directly. Just read and see.
((Anica106 here...again, it was my job to proofread, so don't yell at her if I missed something. Also again, SFD doesn't own YYH. ))
Chapter 2 Where' s the Tragedy?
"I'm in! I'm in!" Botan squealed, jumping up and down excitedly. Everyone looked at her, startled.
"What?"
"The play, sillies!" Botan smiled waayy too cheerily at them all. "Look! See? There's my name!"
They all looked, and, indeed, there was Botan's name, right next to "Juliet's Nurse."
"And there's Hiei's!" she yelled excitedly. Yusuke winced and clapped his hands over his ears.
"Jeez, Botan. You didn't have to screech," he grumbled sourly.
"Hiei? That shrimp? But he didn't try out! Did he?" Kuwabara protested, looking around at the others and catching Kurama's eye. Hiei stood beside him, arms folded, looking bored and angry. Kurama glanced at Kuwabara and then to the list tacked up onto the door and shrugged delicately.
"No, he didn't; however, it would appear that the director doesn't care," he said dryly.
"Which one is Romeo?" Hiei asked, eyes locked on the offending paper that dared to associate him with anything human. Everyone did an anime fall.
"Only the most important male role," Koenma snapped jealously. "Where's my name? I'm the ruler of the underworld! Why wasn't I chosen for Romeo? I'm infinitely handsomer than he is. And taller too," he added, ignoring Hiei's death look. If he didn't see it, it couldn't hurt him.
"Maybe because you always have a pacifier in your mouth?" Yusuke suggested, snickering.
"There you are," Kurama murmured, "right beneath Botan's. You are Juliet's father. And the judge/prince."
"Oh, well, at least I got two parts," Koenma said, slightly mollified, looking over at Hiei, who was looking at Kurama.
"Where's your name?" he asked, suspiciously.
"I don't...wait. There it is. I'm your understudy. I fill in for you if you need it," Kurama said, trying not to sound disappointed, looking away firmly so he wouldn't have to see Hiei's eyes on him, characteristically devoid of any outward show of emotion.
"Hey!" Yusuke yelled suddenly, breaking everyone's train of thought. "Baby breath! I got three parts!" He swelled with pride, glancing over at Keiko to see if she had noticed. "I'm--" he frowned, stumbling over the name. "Tyb-Tybalt, and a servant, and this other guy."
"Yes, well, both of mine are more important than all three of yours put together, Yusuke," Koenma glared.
"Are not!"
"Are too!"
"Are not!"
"Are too!"
"Oh, both of you cut it out!" Botan snapped, hitting them over the head with her oar.
Keiko rolled her eyes at the boys' immaturity and shivered."If we're done staring at a piece of paper and arguing, maybe we can go somewhere where it's warmer."
"Yeah," Yusuke said, "I'm freezing my-" (slap)
"Yusuke!"
"Jeez, Keiko, you don't even know what I was going to say!"
"I don't want to know what you were going to say! Keep that foul mouth of yours closed."
"What if I wanted to do something crazy like yell at Kuwabara or kiss you or eat ice cream?"
"No. You're not allowed to open your mouth--wha--?" She stopped and stared at Yusuke for a second as all of what he had said clicked in her mind. She hadn't even really been paying attention, sure she didn't want to hear any of his excuses. She blushed and whacked Yusuke hard enough for him to fall face first into the snow. The others stared.
"Impressive," Koenma murmured. He supported their "relationship" completely, as Keiko seemed the only one able to keep Yusuke in line. She even got him to attend school and turn in his homework occasionally, which no one else had managed yet.
"Bad form," Hiei and Kurama muttered together.
"Oh, Urameshi got told!" Kuawabara gloated. Yusuke's reply was thankfully muffled by the snow he was still buried in.
"I agree with Keiko. It's time to get someplace warm," Botan declared after a few seconds of silence. She walked off, leading the way as the others followed.
"Oowww," Yusuke said pitifully. No one paid any attention.
(At Kurama's house)
"I'm going to raid the refrigerator," Yusuke announced upon entering. "That alright with you, Kurama?" He actually waited for a reply this time, as the last time he'd eaten everything in it, including Kurama's mother's Birthday cake. Kurama had NOT been pleased to find this out.
"Me too!" Kuwabara yelled, and the two of them rushed off to the kitchen as soon as Kurama had nodded.
"Sure..." he said, watching them with a slightly lost look on his face.
"Well, It's been fun, Kurama, but we've got to run. Got an underworld to rule and souls to transport. You know how it is," Koanma told him as Botan nodded behind him.
"Fine," Kurama replied softly. Botan and Koenma left. Keiko decided to go investigate the kitchen as noises followed by a loud series of crashes escaped through the doors. This left Kurama alone with Hiei in his room. He slowly walked around once or twice, as though familiarizing himself with what everything looked like. He sat down at his desk, got up and looked through some music, put it down again, and threw himself gently on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. Hiei watched all this silently from his place of residence on Kurama's windowsill. Kurama had jokingly told him once that he spent so much time there he was going to charge him rent. But now it seemed the playful kitsune wasn't in any kind of mood to play, still staring up at the ceiling above his bed. When he abruptly got up and started pacing again, Hiei decided it might be time to speak.
"Kurama?"
"Hmm?"
"...." Hiei decided the best approach was to just ask. No sense in playing guessing games with the fox all night. "What's wrong with you?"
That had come out harsher than he'd intended, but really, Kurama shouldn't be letting himself get all wrapped up over something like this. It could be dangerous, losing one's awareness for something so dangerous as a journey through one's own head. Hiei knew from personal experience. What was more worrisome was the Kurama hardly seemed to have noticed his tone at all, or even really heard his words.
"Nothing."
"Hn. What are you thinking?"
"Nothing." This was irritating.
"Liar," he spat, glaring at Kurama now.
"...Am not...." he replied unconvincingly. It seemed Hiei would have to guess after all. How annoying.
"It's about that stupid play thing." It was a statement, not a question. Kurama recognized this. He had an uneasy feeling Hiei had guessed exactly what was wrong and it embarrassed him.
"Are you angry because I got the part of Romeo and you wanted it?"
Kurama sat up, startled. How.... "No. Not at you. I think it's perfect for you." He did, too. Hiei would make a wonderful Romeo...either that or he would decapitate Juliet and run off with the friar to go raid monasteries the world over. There were actually quite a lot of valuable things in monasteries, although not as many now though as there had been at one point. Youko had relieved many of them of their treasures.
"Then your reason for acting like this...?" Hiei would not be dissuaded.
"I don't know, Hiei..."
Hiei glared harder. Kurama sighed. He wasn't going to leave him alone until he was satisfied with his answer. "I just thought I would get the part, that's all. You don't even want it. I dragged you there, and then you got it. I'm just...lost, I suppose." He blushed, not wanting to say his reason why outright. But judging from the way Hiei's eyes widened a fraction, he had guessed. Kurama burned with shame.
"...You lost...to me...that's it, isn't it?" Hiei asked finally, revelation dawning. "As Youko, you never failed to get what you wanted; no one dared deny you...and as Suuichi, you're perfect. Good little Suuichi who is ALWAYS top of his class and wins at anything. And now, you did. You wanted something and you didn't get it. I did." He stared at Kurama for a long moment, amazed. "Kurama, are you acting like this because you've never 'lost' before?"
Kurama glared. "NO." Hiei waited, eyes still wide, mouth turning up in the barest form of a grin. He found this amusing.
"...Maybe," Kurama conceded, voice quiet. A strange noise caused him to look up quickly. Hiei was chuckling. Laughing, almost. It was Kurama's turn to stare in amazement.
"Baka fox." Hiei was suddenly serious. "You can't let yourself get like this merely because someone got chosen instead of you. You were better at the audition. You know that. You would've been chosen had you not looked so much like a girl." Hiei smirked and Kurama glared. "What would happen if you went back to the Makai now, and someone out there proved themselves to be better than you? Someone out foxed the fox himself? Took Youko Kurama's place as the best thief?"
Kurama winced at this illustration. Hiei always chose the most painful ways of bringing his point across. "I would..." He stopped. Honestly? Youko wouldn't be able to stand the shame. He was a prideful creature, unable to stand the idea that he might not be the best. Hiei had been exactly right about that. And Kurama himself? What would he do? "I would...live out the remainder of my life in anonymity. Youko had his time to shine; the wisest thing to do in that instance would be to step aside and let the other have his time. Everyone should be allowed that opportunity. I was offered mine when I bested the thief who was the greatest before me. Everyone has their time to shine. What they chose to do with that time is up to them." He looked at Hiei seriously. "Youko would die in defeat, alone and miserable, hating himself. But I would step back and let the next one come in and make his mark on the world."
Hiei sat there, stunned. He hadn't thought of things in quite that manner before. Kurama always brought forth a new light to anything and everything. And Hiei kept him from going to far. He shook himself. The fox was right of course; he always was. But he also had a bad habit of letting himself become overwhelmed with his own thinking.
"You're feeling sorry for yourself," he said coolly, scowling at his friend. Kurama looked at him, startled out of whatever dark thoughts he'd previously been living in."You're giving into your weak ningen emotions. The Kurama I knew wouldn't be upset. He probably wouldn't even care." Hiei watched him closely as he turned those words over in his mind. Hiei didn't believe them for an instant, but, if Kurama did...
Kurama himself sat hunched on the bed, knees drawn up to chin. He looks like a small child., Hiei thought, surpised. The great Youko Kurama...feeling sorry for himself because he didn't get the part he wanted in some stupid ningen play... Hiei almost started laughing at the thought, but stopped, realizing Kurama had yet to move from his spot. He didn't know it, but Kurama was thinking almost exactly the same thing.
This is stupid. The "Great Youko Kurama," feeling jealous of his best friend because he got to play Romeo and he didn't. Hei would probably be rolling on the floor laughing at me right now if he knew what I was thinking... And why does this bother me? I WANTED Hiei to be in the play. And yet, now he was regretting it. Even as he had told Hiei not to be over confident, he had secretly been thinking he was right, there was no real competition--Apart from the person reading across from me. And as much as he didn't want to admit it, he was completely taken by surprise. Hiei had shown him up, when it was he who had shown Hiei everything he knew, who was older, and who knew Shakespeare's work. Hiei had never heard of the man. He had merely shown up, and stolen what the great Youko Kurama had set his sights on. This had never happened before. And as much as he hated it, Hiei had been completely right about him. He hated how it had thrown his whole thinking off. Was he so arrogant that he wouldn't live with Hiei being Romeo and him not?
He laughed suddenly, catching Hiei off guard. He'd been about to leave Kurama to his ponderings when the fox hadn't moved in almost 20 minutes. He narrowed his eyes at him suspiciously. Kurama merely smiled at him. No, he thought. He was being silly. Hiei would do great, and life would go on. Everything would be fine.
"You'rer right, Hiei, I was feeling sorry for myself. I'm glad you're Romeo."
"Hn. Well, personally, I wish you'd been chosen. I never wanted anything to do with the play."Kurama hid a smile.
"What do they require, anyway? I only read those two parts with you."
"Well, they'll send you a full script later on--tomorrow or the day after--so you can learn your lines."
"I can't read it?"
"No, Hiei. The idea is to make people believe that it is really happening. You can't accomplish that if your reading from the script."
Hiei scowled. "At least Botan and Koenma will be Juliet's parents. Botan's not going to be all 'cuddly' and 'lovey-dovey' with me."
Kurama wanted to laugh, but suspected Hiei would have no problem with decapitating him if he did so just now. He was also beginning to suspect that Hiei had missed something fundamental in the central idea of the play. He wondered how to approach this topic.
"Um, Hiei, you do know this is a romantic tragedy?" Hiei looked up from where he was going through Kurama's desk, having become bored with the conversation.
"So?" He held up a can opener. "What's this doing in here?"
"Oh, I was looking for that," Kurama said distractedly. "But, Hiei, Romeo and Juliet are the main characters in a love story."
"Is it a happy story?" Hiei sneered.
"No, nothing like those stories Keiko and Botan like to read," Kurama answered, knowing what Hiei was thinking. Hiei shrugged and continued to rummage through the desk, pulling out random papers and reading a few. Kurama decided to try again.
"Romeo and Juliet are considered to be some of the greatest lovers in all of time," he said hopefully.
"Don't be stupid, kitsune. They're not real. What is this?" He held up a little mermaid watch and a love poem. Kurama blushed.
"I had planned on giving that to a girl I had a crush on in third grade. I chickened out."
"Hn." Hiei looked amused.
"Hiei, I don't think you understand," Kurama sighed helplessly.
"Don't understand what?" He looked at Kurama, puzzled.
"Hiei, you're going to have to do a couple of 'love scenes' with whoever plays Juliet."
Long pause. then,
"WHAT?!"
Downstairs, Kuwabara and Yusuke stopped in the middle of beating each other up, Keiko froze in the middle of pushing between them, and they all slowly brought their eyes up to the ceiling, from which voices were eminating.
"I HAVE TO DO WHAT?"
"Look, they wouldn't call it a romantic tragedy if there was no romance!"
"So where's all the tragedy?!"
"There is a lot of tragedy! They die!!"
"Why don't they die sooner??"
"Because then there would be no romance! It would just be tragedy!"
"SO?!"
"Well, that's not what Shakespeare wrote!"
"Baka ningen!"
"Glad to see we've expanded your vocabulary so widely!"
"Shut up, fox! You're--"
"HIEI!"
"WHAT?!"
"...Stop yelling at me," Kurama said quietly. A silence fell over the whole house.
"Well. Food time," Yusuke announced uneasily. Everyone looked at him. Keiko slapped him. Yusuke just looked at her and swallowed a large mouthful of food. Keiko rolled her eyes.
Hiei looked at Kurama and sat down on the window sill. Kurama took a deep breath and sat down on his bed. They were quiet for a while before Kurama ventured to speak.
"I'm sure it won't be too bad, Hiei. If they are going to let kids come to the play, they won't be allowed to put in anything to riske."
"Hn." This 'hn' was to try and convince Kurama that he didn't care anymore, and to cover up any interest he might have in what Kurama had to say. He knew this and continued, watching the little koorime for signs of danger.
"I highly doubt it will be more than a kiss, maybe a few kisses. Romeo and Juliet don't really get any time alone anyway because theirs is a secret and forbidden love, and girls especially weren't left unchaperoned very often, if ever. It was mean to protect their 'innocence.' "
"Hn." This "hn" simply said he didn't wish to discuss it any more until he'd thought about it, and Kurama decided to respect this.
"But that's enough of that. We should probably go down and visit our friends. My mother will be home soon and it's almost dinner time and then they'll have to leave." A crash came from downstairs, followed by Yusuke yelling at Kuwabara. "My mother's china!" Kurama gasped, and dashed out of the room in search of Kuwabara and to see what they had managed to break this time. The glass shop got rich any time his friends came over to visit. If his mother only knew how many things got broken and replaced while she was away....he shook his head and vanished from view.
This left Hiei alone in Kurama's room. He looked around and slowly walked over to the full length mirror Kurama had installed in his closet so he would always be able to make sure he looked his best before leaving for school each day. Hiei had almost never looked at his reflection, never felt like he needed to. No one cared what the Forbidden Child looked like. Why would they? For that matter, why would he? And he had always been careful not to let any one get close to him, at least until Kurama came along, and the others, too, he supposed. And he doubted even they really cared what he looked like. Excpet maybe Kurama, he thought, scowling as he remembered Kurama saying something about Yusuke giving him old clothes to wear while he was here. Kurama's were always way too big and heavy on the pink.
He stood in front of the mirror for sometime, staring at his reflection. Scanning his eyes up and down, Hiei studied himself, trying to be as honest in his assessment as possible. He ran his rough hand over his muscular arms, his chest, then through his hair. Turning sideways, he continued to examine himself. Smirking, he ruffled his hair to give himself a dangerous, just-won-a-fight look. He faced forward again suddenly a struck a "bad boy" pose, eyes widening slightly.
Wow...Hiei thought. He touched his arm again. I look good. I wonder how much more impressive I look in battle, with my cloak and my sword.... He considered grabbing said items and seeing for himself, but decided against it. Having fun now, Hiei got a little carried away with his posing, performing extremely fast, complex movements, flips, and turns, ending crouched in front of the mirror, eyes glinting dangerously.
"Hello, Juliet," Hiei told his reflection. " 'Tis I, your beloved Romeo." He smirked. "Come with me, and I will show you things you have never dreamed of." He switched over to an actually fairly convincing girl's voice, only slightly exaggerated.
"Oh, Romeo! Romeo! I have waited for you for so long! Oh, please, darling Romeo; take me away from all of this!" Hiei grinned a patented bad boy grin. He felt great; he wished, almost, that Juliet really was here so he could do more than just talk. He looked around and grabbed Kurama's pillow, still smiling in a sexy, dangerous way at it.
"If you insist, my dearest Juliet. If I must." He held the pillow to himself, really beginning to get in the mood now. The pillow might as well be Juliet for all he cared. He leaned down and kissed it, slowly and sensuously. Just because he didn't have real relationships didn't mean he couldn't when he felt like it, he thought rebelliously. He could do it; he was even really good at it. He just chose not exercise that particular area of expertise. He straightened up again and smirked once more at Kurama's pillow.
"Oh! Romeo! But h-how?"
"I'm just naturally good at some things." Hiei leered at the pillow. He shook it gently to show its/her giddy embarrasment.
"Romeo! Thou shouldst not speak of such things so openly! 'Tis scandalous!" a sweet and charged female voice said, half teasing, half shocked. Hiei looked down at his pillow.
"And why mustn't I? Are you saying you didn't like it?" he asked, suddenly sounding very intense and husky. He stared at the pillow hungrily.
"...Like what?, specifically?" the warm fluting female voice quavered.
"The kiss, Juliet. Merely the kiss," Hiei replied, his voice and body language definitely suggesting something else.
"Oh! Oh, my, I--I loved the--the kiss..." the voice got much softer and turned shy on the last two words. It just made Hei more determined.
"What else would you love, Juliet?" he asked, eyes burning holes into the pillow. He hardly gave it a chance to answer.
"Oh! I--I, I fear I --Hiei! Hiei, you stop that right now! I have to sleep with that, you know!" The lovely, soft girls voice suddenly shifted back to Kurama's rather annoyed one. Hiei jumped and threw the pillow at Kurama, simultaneously reaching for his katana and searching for any sign of danger. Kurama, meanwhile, had caught the pillow easily and dropped it on the bed. He raised an eyebrow at Hiei.
"A little late for that, don't you think?" he asked, smiling widely, letting his obvious amusement at Hiei being caught off guard and flustered show through. Hiei glared, leaning against the mirror, trying to pull himself back together and stop his knees from shaking. Kurama sat down on the bed and lounged there, grinning wickedly at him. "I told you that you would have fun with this, Hiei. Although I'd rather it wasn't with my pillow."
Kurama had come back from the kitchen, where it turned out Kuwabara and Yusuke had NOT managed to break any more dishes, only the antique lamp from his grandmother. He had paused at the doorway, wondering what kind of mood Hiei would have put himself in by now over the idea of being "romantic" with "Juliet." He'd heard a soft thud and glanced in, plants on hand should they be necessary, and had been quite surprised to see Hiei posing in front of the mirror. He'd watched for a while, amused to see Hiei actually "playing," for lack of a better term. When he'd grabbed Kurama's pillow and started talking to it, Kurama had begun to suspect he might have stayed up a little too late the night before watching Gone With the Wind with him. Only Hiei would manage to turn Romeo into a sexy, miniature Rhett Butler, with punk overlays. It was quite amusing. The others might think Hiei had no sense of humor, but Kurama knew he did. He just didn't like other people to know, including Kurama. He'd had to control himself lest he burst out laughing, and hadn't been able to resist joining in the game, playing the voice of the female pillow--until Hiei had started to get serious. Now, he was afraid he would rupture an organ with all the silent laughter he was suppressing that was shaking inside of him. He wasn't going to forget that moment for a LONG time...and he knew he wasn't going to let Hiei forget, either. At least until he got some new blackmail on Kurama.
Wow...another chapter done. Alright, This is Humor, I promise, but I had to put that big huge serious part in to try and clarify Hiei and Kurama's relationship in this. They are not together, and will not be. They're just friends. although I suppose if you want to take it that way you can. The charac's are not going to be strictly like they were in the show, but I am going to try and keep them as close to it as possible. I will be adding a few of my own character's in this later on, but I promise they're not important. And no one will be getting together with any outside character's; they'll only be there for amusement. There will be suggestive things being said later on once Youko decides to make his presence known( we all know what he's like). But there will not be any lemon or lime....that I know of....pretty much, the most sexual thing that will happen to anyone or anything in this story is what happened to poor Kurama's pillow.....lol. Hiei's never going to live that down....ah, well. Like I said, updates will happen whenever; hope you guys enjoy. Flame me if you want, but it will result in long(er) author notes while I reply to it. And for BakaBahamut: I was nicer to Kuwabara in this one, so I don't want to hear another word about it. I already told you at length about him above. SkyFireDragon signing off! : D