A/N: I promise two things going into this chapter; at the end Mac is still in the states and still in the military. I also promise that the whole issue of Webb will be wrapped up by the end of this chapter. I just can't do forced angst; I leave that to others. Also I need to the first name of Mattie's dad for the next chapter.
Mac's Bedroom
0630 Hours
03/06/2004
I shouldn't have to be up this early. If this were a normal weekend I could stay in bed for another half hour but since I need to run, I'm up now. It's going to be strange running by myself, I've gotten used to running with Harm.
~Knock Knock~
I open the door and Harm's standing there in this running clothes.
"Harm?"
"You ready to go Mac?"
"You don't have to come you know?"
"I know but I thought you might want some company. I can stay here if you want."
I can't believe Harm got up early to go run with me. He hates mornings, he owns an alarm clock with two alarms plus a back up alarm that clangs and jumps around on the shelf.
"I would love some company." We head downstairs and do our warm-up stretches in the living room before heading out. We jog side by side not saying a word for the first ten minutes and twelve seconds of our run.
"Mac, I've got a question for you."
"Okay."
"Were you serious with the talk of resigning?"
"I don't know. I just know that I still have nightmares about Paraguay. I'm not sure I'm ready to risk life and limb again."
"I thought he just wanted you to be a translator for some meetings."
"Well that's what he said but I'm sure there's more to the story. There's always more to the story."
"That's true and of course you don't have the need to know." We both laugh at Harm's comment.
"At least by Webb's standards I don't. That's part of the reason I'm thinking of resigning."
"What's the rest of your reason?"
"The kids."
"The kids?"
"They've lost enough people."
"Just going on this trip isn't a guarantee you're going to die, Mac."
"I know but you've got to admit going on a mission with Webb is the most dangerous thing I've done the past couple of years."
"I guess you have a point. Just do me a favor Mac, make your decision because it's what's best for you not because you think it's what best for everyone else. Okay?"
"I'll try."
"Fair enough." By this time we've completed our run and are back at the house. We head inside and I head for my room to get showered and changed. When I'm done I head back downstairs and discover AJ and Mattie are up.
"Aunt Mac!"
"Hi, how are you this morning?"
"Okay. Where you going, Aunt Mac?"
"I have to go to work for a little while. I'll be back later."
"Okay."
I head for the kitchen hoping to find some coffee and find Harm making breakfast.
"Hey Mac, there's coffee and a bagel on the counter for you."
"Thanks, Harm. See you later."
"Later Mac."
CIA HEADQUARTERS
0900
03/06/2004
I'm shown into a conference room and find Webb, Kershaw, and Catherine Gale. Great just who I want to see. This day is getting better and better.
"I'm sure you're wondering why you're here Colonel."
"Actually I know why I'm here Director Kershaw, why don't you tell me what this assignment involves."
"We really just need your services as a translator, Sarah." Webb tells me. Like I'll believe that's all there really is to the assignment.
"If it were really that simple you'd use your own people Mr. Webb. Also, only my friends call me Sarah and I don't count you among them anymore." Webb looks shocked at that comment. Did he expect me to forget the conversation we had after Bud and Harriet died? Catherine Gale is smiling at me. I want to wipe that smile off of her face.
"Mr. Webb and Ms. Gale, why don't you wait outside?" Webb looks ready to protest but decides against it. A moment later Director Kershaw and I are alone in the conference room.
"Colonel Mackenzie, Mr. Webb told me you'd be perfect for this assignment and I trusted him. Part of that trust was based on the fact that last I knew you two were in a relationship. After what I just saw, I'm not so sure. I'm going to tell you what's involved in this assignment and then I want you to tell me what you think, okay?"
"Okay."
"Webb will be posing as a crooked government official meeting with some diplomats in the mid-east that we believe have ties to terrorist organizations. In order to get you into all the meetings including the ones behind the scenes. You would be posing as Webb's mistress."
"What!" I almost drop my coffee cup.
"This is going to be a problem for you isn't it Colonel?"
"I can do the assignment. I can be professional about this, but if you were counting on the relationship between Webb and I helping to sell the charade you should know a few things."
"Like what, Colonel."
"Webb and I broke up months ago. As far as I'm concerned it is over. I will play the part if ordered to but I will hate every minute of it."
"Okay thank you for telling me that Colonel. I'm going to bring Ms Gale and Mr. Webb back in now."
Kershaw calls them back into the room and waits for them to be seated before speaking.
"Mr. Webb, I'm afraid that I've decided against allowing this mission to go forward."
"What!" Webb yells.
"I'm just not convinced that this mission can be accomplished with the assets you're planning on using. If you want to rethink you're mission planning, I'd be willing to rethink my decision."
With that said Director Kershaw leaves the conference room. As soon as the door closes Webb turns to face me.
"What did you tell him, Sarah?" Webb looks furious. Catherine seems to take this comment as her cue to leave. I wait for the door to close before responding.
"I told him that you and I were no longer an item and that you couldn't play off that to help our charade. I told him that I would play the part but I'd hate every minute of it. I also told him I'd previously told you no."
"Sarah, I need your help on this. I thought you'd love the chance to get out there where the action is. What happened to the Sarah Mackenzie I know?"
"I don't know. I just know I'm glad Kershaw pulled the plug. I'd have probably gone if ordered but the thought of playing your mistress makes me sick. I don't like you very much at the moment and having to play lovey-dovey would be hard. I'd do it, but it would be hard."
"You didn't seem to mind it too much in Paraguay or on Christmas Eve for that matter."
"What can I say? I've grown up since then."
"Sarah."
"Does your mother want grandchildren, Mr. Webb?"
"Yes, why?"
"Because if you call me by my first name one more time you will be unable to provide your mother with those grandchildren, if you follow my meaning. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going home to my children."
"They're not yours, Colonel."
"That's where you're wrong. I didn't give birth to them but they are my children." I get up and leave the conference room slamming the door so hard that I'd be surprised if it was still on its hinges.
Harm and Mac's House
2203 hours
03/06/2004
I crawl into bed and pull the covers up over me. It's actually been a very nice day. After my meeting at CIA Headquarters I called the Admiral to let him know I'd be in on Monday. He didn't seem too happy about that until I explained that Kershaw decided to pull the plug on the operation.
When I got home, everyone was cleaning the house. After that we ran Jen home, and then went grocery shopping after going out to lunch. The afternoon was spent playing with the kids and doing the usual household chores.
My thoughts, as I drift off are focused on how relieved I am that I don't have to go on that mission with Webb.
"Mac! Wake up!" I force my eyes open and find Harm, Mattie and AJ all standing in my room.
"What's wrong, you guys?" Harm and Mattie look at me like I've lost my mind.
"You were screaming in your sleep, Mac."
Now I remember I was dreaming of Paraguay.
"I just had a nightmare."
"What's a nightmare, Aunt Mac?"
"I had a bad dream, AJ." I smile at AJ.
"Uncle Harm will stay here and protect you." AJ pulls Harm over to the bed as he says that.
"Right Uncle Harm!"
"AJ, I'm not sure that's a good idea."
"Why not? That's what mommy and daddy did for bad dreams."
Harm and I look at each other trying to figure out what to do. AJ's not likely to give this up. I try to tell Harm with my eyes that it's fine if he stays and he seems to get the message.
"Okay, AJ I'll stay."
"Goodnight Uncle Harm. Good night Aunt Mac."
"Good night AJ." We say together has AJ leaves followed by Mattie.
"I'll make sure he gets back to bed you."
"Thanks, Mattie." We both tell her.
"So Mac, you want me to head back to my own room?"
"You can if you want to but you don't have to."
"Okay then I'll stay just in case you need someone to talk to."
"Okay."
Harm lays down on top of the blankets and quickly falls asleep. I lay there trying to go to sleep, it's not until I feel Harm roll over and spoon up against me, with his arms wrapped around me and my blankets, that I find myself drifting off again.