Well, here is the next chapter, and the great plot twist is behind us. But...is there still room for another...?
KitsuneAkai13 - Yep, big twist, and it isn't over yet! There still is this chapter to go, and then some, so keep reading!
Electra Black - Glad you like it, and here's the next chapter.
animeprincess1452 - I know it was sad, but don't say I didn't warn you. One of the main genres is tragedy, so you should have seen this coming. Oh, and I read your story, it was really good.
LordGale - Sorry the chapter is so sad, but I have a way of bringing out people's emotions in my writing. Just one question, why did you review chapter 4 before reviewing chapter 1?
Candy the Duck - Gohan is completely in love with Trunks, so he is a little distracted at the moment. But still, he will feel pain for losing Goten, all in good time.
Why don't I stop talking so you all can start reading, okay?
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Chapter 4: One Lost Love
The rain pelts down so hard, so hard I can barely see anything at all through the raindrops the size of small rocks. Yet I still see. My vision is sharp as ever, now that I have been so completely shocked awake by holding my own little brother dead in my arms, knowing I wasn't there to save his life.
I just can't understand what has happened, why things went this way, and all the things that should have been but weren't run through my brain.
I should have been stronger.
I should have been there to help you two fight.
I should have realized that the alien was so powerful.
I should have been able to save Goten's life.
And I should have not let any of this happen.
But none of that really matters anymore, there is no such thing as a time machine since the you from the future departed, and amid all that rubble that used to be your house, I am sure your mother has been killed as well. That means that there is no turning back the clock, no rectifying the mistakes I have made tonight. No fixing everything that went wrong. I can't even use the Dragonballs, both you and Goten have been killed before, by Buu, and that means that Shenlong cannot bring you back a second time. As for New Namek, it's only a distant memory, blown mercilessly to ashes years ago just like the first one was.
In short, nothing can be done anymore, and simply dwelling on these thoughts of pain in my own culpability won't do anything. For the here and now, all I can do is hurry up.
My vision narrows, so that I can't see anything but you lying there, on the wet ground. I don't see anything else, because nothing else matters. You are the light at the end of my tunnel.
I can't feel your Ki, just like I couldn't feel my little brother's Ki and I realize then that it may be too late. You might be dead too.
Dead...too...I think.
It doesn't strike me with full force until now the horrific realization of what I am saying to myself, you might be dead, Trunks, but my little brother already is.
It's just not fair, he was so young and so innocent; he didn't have to die like that.
The tears finally well up in my eyes as I stagger slowly toward your prostrate figure, the emotions that I so needed to fight at my best coming out in full, only at the completely wrong time to do me any good.
Goten...
I swore from the moment he was born that I would protect him, and now I have failed in that. How could I?
Every single fiber of my little brother...his hopes and dreams, desires and fantasies and all the wonderful things that was him is gone.
Gone.
And it's no fault but my own.
I slow to almost a complete stop, feeling my knees weaken and all I want to do is fall down to the ground and cry at all the unfairness of it. I can't explain it, but I snap, and all I can care about is him. He was just a little ten-year-old boy, entrusted to my comfort and care, and with all the power I possess, I couldn't even save his life.
All at once my rationality returns, and I realize that I am doing it again, looking back upon a past that I cannot and will not change no matter how much I want it. I have to concentrate on the other little boy that I love, and see if I can make sure he doesn't die as well. That little boy is you, Trunks.
My eyes snap back open, and I restart my unsteady, weakened, half-walk and half-run toward you, because I know it in my heart that you won't leave me like this.
It seems like another eternity before I make those last few feet and pick you up off the ground. It feels like I am picking up a bag of bones, with no surviving internal structure, a lot like my little brother was...
My little brother...was...I think, the pain returning momentarily before I force it away.
I don't even want to know how many of your bones have been broken, how many vital organs crushed and how much of your skin is torn up. I only want one thing, Trunks, I just want one tiny sign that you are alive.
One gentle murmuring of my name; one little twitch of an arm; one miniscule flutter of an eyelid. That's all I am asking for.
"Trunks...?" I say softly, running my hands over your battered body.
It's not working, and with every single cell in my body I silently scream out your name, and beg you - no: command you - to be alive. My hand drifts from your bloody hair, past the broken jaw and the cut neck, and settles on your chest.
I feel something so small I could be imagining it.
But then I feel it again, and with a burst of concentration I can identify it.
The beating from your tiny heart.
Alive...my little Trunks is alive!
And may the late Dende damn me if I can't keep you that way.
- - -
The cold, sterile air of one of the human hospitals is a sharp contrast to the pounding rain and dirt and pain of that memory.
It's been a week Trunks, and even though most of your body is healed, there is still the small chance that you could be gone at any moment.
They won't even let me in there to see you, they won't let you hold me in my arms because I am not part of your immediate family. They would probably let my dad in there, if only because it seems even the dammed humans owe him a debt of gratitude like the gods do.
I try not to let my mind wander to how many different ways I could torture those stupid doctors. I might not be one myself, but I know enough to figure out that there is something still wrong with you and whatever it is they can't find it and they can't fix it.
Damn them!
I have seen them pull dead people back from the brink, repaired people busted in pieces, and reattach severed limbs, among other miracles of modern medicine. So why can't they save you, why, Trunks, why?
My thought are interrupted when I feel a strong Ki approach, and I can identify it as your father even before I lift my bowed head. He doesn't keep walking as I thought he would, but simply stops right in front of me, and clears his throat to address me.
"I know how you feel for him," he says plainly.
I look up, and my confused look surely says all that needs to be said as the dark prince continues: "I can see it in your eyes. I know when a person like you sits outside a room and doesn't eat for days on end, he must have strong feelings. Especially it they are Saiya-jin."
I don't answer, I can't.
"And before you ask, no, I do not know what is wrong with my son, and neither do those worthless human healers," he goes on to say, "if that dammed baka onna...his mother...was still alive, I'm sure she could fix the brat, but he is going to die...I can feel it."
That hurts too, because I know that surely I must be responsible for her death as well, though I am starting to finally accept that it was Fate, and not me, that did this.
I look all the way up from the bench where I sit, looking him straight in the eye, and I can almost feel the connection we share.
He and I are more alike than I would prefer to believe. Both of us are the only true Saiya-jin warriors left in the world. You and my little brother are...rather: were...just little kids, as strong as you were, and my dad is a kid at heart. Both of us fight with our feelings only to have our own power levels continually overshadowed by the seemingly-insane strength of my father. I remember so long ago, back when we were fighting Frieza and there was a time when Vegeta actually saved my life, batting me out of the way of one of Frieza's deadly Ki blasts. It took me years to repay the favor, saving him from the wrath of Cell in a move that almost cost me the entire fight.
I know that small bit of respect is still there, and I know he can feel it too.
"I told them if they don't let you in there to see him that I will blast them all to Hell," he suddenly says, as if he had just been reading my mind.
His smirk grows a little, that same old Vegeta peeking through as I try to figure out what he might be thinking underneath that mask.
"And to prove my point I took the head off of one of them," he finishes as he walks off, not even bothering to wait for my answer.
I gather myself and walk through the door to the room, a little unsure what to expect.
- - -
A few minutes later you wake up, shifting slightly in the bed with the pure white sheets to match your pure heart. I look over, sitting down next to you in a small chair and stroking your soft hair, trying to avoid the myriad of tubes stuck to your little body.
"Gohan...?" you say uncertainly, looking at me.
"Yeah," I answer, forcing out a weak smile. "It's me."
"Where have you been?" you ask, "I missed you."
"I missed you too, Trunks."
"That bad guy was really tough, but I showed him 'cause I didn't want him to hurt you...," you say, and only then does the realization hit me.
I was lying there on the ground, about to die, getting the shit beat out of me by that alien, when he was suddenly knocked off me by someone, but I lost consciousness before I could see who it was. I had really expected one of the older Saiya-jin, maybe your father or mine, but now I can see the truth, it was you. You were the one that killed the alien, just a little boy who succeeded where I had failed, it was so...wrong to be like that. I think about it for a little longer, figuring out that if you had enough strength to kill that monster, most likely you wouldn't have been hurt so bad if I had been a stronger and killed it first.
"Thanks...for saving my life," I say uncertainly.
"Hey, you've saved mine before too," you respond tenderly.
The silence settles in after that little conversation, as both of us take in the first words we have exchanged since that terrible day.
"My head hurts real bad," you say out of the blue.
I look toward you, unsure how to respond, and my eyes meet with yours, the same sparkling blue eyes still captivating me and drawing me closer.
You keep going, saying some fancy medical words I don't know and don't care about, saying how the doctors think something is still messed up in you and that you aren't going to live and how your dad keeps leaving me and your mom isn't here...
I don't even hear it at all after that. I don't want to ignore you, because what you are saying must be important to you, but all I care about is that you are talking, and you are alive. I just stare at you, your little hands gesturing in the air and your eyes shining with that incredible strength from within. My boy, still alive...
I hope whatever is wrong with you gets fixed, because nothing else can fix it.
There is no senzu, there is no Dende, there is no help from the Dragonballs...
"You even listenin' Gohan?"
"Huh," is all I can manage as I honestly haven't been.
But you just smile, looking at me so cute and funny like you always do, letting out a little giggle and resting your hand on mine.
"It's okay, 'dat stuff bores me too."
I realize that it's getting late, and a quick glance out the window, the slightest amount of time I want to spend not staring at you, tells me that it's already dark out.
"You should go back to sleep, you need to rest," I say quietly.
Your smile fades a little and you squeeze my hand affectionately, shifting a little underneath the covers before looking back up.
"Awwww, you just don't wanna talk to me anymore," you say playfully.
I smile back, using my other hand to pull the sheets up to your chin and stroking your hair for a short while before speaking again.
"That's not it, I just think you should let your body rest."
"I know," you respond with a slight whine, "but I don't wanna!"
"Trunks...," I say sternly, looking playfully harsh.
"Okay fine," you say, giving in, "but only if you sleep with me 'cause I get lonely."
"Okay," I say softly.
In a few minutes you are asleep, and I realize that I am watching you sleeping, again, and once again I could be holding you in my arms but I am not.
It really doesn't matter though, you feel safe, and that's what counts.
I let myself slide further down the chair, resting my head on the bed next to you and trying to get into a more comfortable position. I don't need to though, and after such a long day, I fall into sleep easily, the night rolling by without my notice.
- - -
I wake up in the middle of the night, only this time you really are there.
Trunks...?
Something isn't right, you are shaking, I can feel it. But I know you aren't cold or anything like that, and I know it won't be long now.
"Trunks," I say, and you look over at me, your normally shiny eyes clouded and dull from the pain I know you feel inside you.
"Gohan...," you say in a choked whisper, "it...it hurts."
I don't know what hurts, but that doesn't matter nearly as much as the fact that you hurt, and you need me to be here for you. I gather you in my arms, holding you just like I did before, watching you with so much pain as you tremble, your breath coming in ragged gasps.
"I-I don't w-wanna die."
I prepare to respond, to tell you what I have been going over and over again in the back of my head. I'm going to tell you to fight it, to keep trying to live because you have to.
But I realize that isn't the right answer. I only want you alive...for me.
Only once I remove myself from the equation and push aside my own feelings, my love, for you, can I see the cold, hard truth right there in front of me. I have always wanted the best for you, and keeping you alive for my own selfish reasons isn't right, and I don't want to do it.
I have to make the best decision for you.
"Yes, Trunks," I say, trying to be as strong as I can, "you do."
You look at me, your eyes showing me all the pain you are feeling, telling me just how horrible it is when a young boy dies.
"What...," you say softly, "why?"
"Goten is dead...and I know how much you love him. As much as I want to keep you here with me, your place is with him, in heaven," I say, holding you even closer.
"Wh-what's heaven like?" you ask.
"It's where Goten is," I respond simply, "and a place where you can play when you want to, eat when you want to, train when you want to. You won't even have to do anything you don't want to do again, and you can spend as much time with him as you want."
You tremble in my arms; your breath coming even slower, and I can feel your heartbeat slow as my words offer you peace.
"You won't ever have to hurt anymore, and you can have everything you want."
"I-I...," you struggle to say.
"Shhhhh," I whisper soothingly, running my fingers through your hair, "let go, Trunks."
"I love y-you...s-so m-m-much," you say, barely able to get out the words.
"I love you too, Trunks."
Your eyes start to dim, the color drains from your face and I can barely feel your Ki start heading down steadily. Your head falls limp in my hand and you stare at the ceiling.
"Trunks, look at me," I say and instantly your eyes snap back to my own.
"I-I'm scared Gohan," you say, gasping for breath, your little body rocking with painful spasms.
"I'm here."
With that, you manage one last, beautiful smile, before you gasp once more for breath, shaking violently in my arms, and then stop. Your body rests, and your eyes cloud over, still locked on me, the last thing you saw in this world. The wail of one of the machines tells me that your heart isn't going anymore, but I already know you are dead.
I set you down on the bed, wrapping the covers around your body, and rest your head on the pillow as the doctors try to enter the room, hearing the moan of the machine to match the one in my heart, but I won't let them near you. It's already over, nothing more can be done and as I gently close your eyelids, letting you go at last, I know that you are already up there, somewhere. I know that you and Goten are holding each other again, just as it should be, joyous in your wonderful reunion.
Who was I to ever come in between you two...?
I'll always love you, Trunks.
Rest in peace, my boy.
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I don't know how that affected all of you, but writing this made me cry. I would like to hear how you feel about it, so please review. Up next, the epilogue, and Gohan's ultimate fate. Thanks for reading, see you all next time.