A/N: Yes, I know... Delay... Delay... I feel so bad. Why can't I be quicker about delays? (Sigh) THANK YOU FOR THE WONDERFUL, KIND REVIEWS! (Hugs)
A/n: I have decided to get off my lazy butt and be much quicker on the updates before school starts because when accursed school begins, updates can only come from the weekends... and maybe during the week! So, I WILL be quicker about this! I will!
Disclaimer: I do not own Wizard of Oz – and I do not own Phantom of the Opera... sadly. I also don't own Coca-cola. What do you want from me??
Chapter 3:
The three new friends approached a dark, intimidating forest. They silently hoped that the trees in this forest had living companions to speak with and had a firm grasp of their sanity.
"I don't like this forest!" Christine suddenly exclaimed, her grip on Raoul and Richard growing tighter. "It's too dark and creepy!" Pausing, she cocked her blonde head to one side as her eyes glazed over. "Although, something seems to draw me to the darkness..."
Raoul and Richard stared at her for a moment.
"I can't see my toes!" Raoul declared, squinting. "It's too dark!"
"I can't see my money!" The other complained, sniffling. "The tree stole it!"
The tin man and the scarecrow both winced in pain, for they were losing all feeling in their arms because Christine's grip was rather too tight.
"Do you think we'll see any," Chewing on her lip, the girl's voice lowered to a trembling whisper, "Stalkers in here?"
"Never mind about stalkers! What about robbers?" Richard pointed out, gulping.
"What about animals???" The scarecrow whimpered.
Christine's eyes broadened. "Wild animals?" She inquired, as they slowly made their way through the darkness.
"We might." The tin man replied, his tin creaking as he sauntered forward, adding quietly, "Although ballet rats are more annoying..."
"Do you think the wild animals eat straw?" Raoul asked, swallowing.
"I hope so." He answered the fearful question, but he was met with a glare from the scarecrow and a blank stare from the blonde. Rolling his eyes, he cleared his throat. "There are mostly lions, tigers, and bears in here."
"Oh! You mean those cute, adorable cubs that you could just cuddle forever and ever?" Christine squealed.
Raoul beamed, a sigh of relief coming over him.
"No. I mean those ferocious animals that, if you cuddled them, you probably wouldn't live to tell about it."
Two gulps could be heard.
"Stalkers..." Christine whispered, terrified.
"Robbers..." Raoul mumbled, looking around.
"And ballet rats!" Richard shouted.
"Oh, my!" The young girl gasped.
"Stalkers..."
"Robbers..."
"And ballet rats!"
"Oh, my!"
"Stalkers..."
"Robbers..."
"And ballet rats!"
"Oh, my!"
"Stalkers..."
"Robbers..."
"And ballet rats!"
"Oh, my!"
"Stalkers..."
"Stop!" Christine screeched, causing the group to come to a halt. Retrieving the oilcan, she oiled Richard's legs, sighing. "That was getting on my nerves... All right!" She happily stated, resuming their skipping and panicking.
"Robbers..."
"And ballet rats!"
She hesitated, stopping the prancing.
"What is it NOW?" Richard questioned, irritation rising in his voice.
"Something's moving over there!" She cried, pointing a small finger in the direction of a rustling bush. "It's a stalker!"
"No! It's a robber!" Raoul stood, frozen in place.
"NO! IT'S A BALLET RAT!" The tin man emitted a cry of fear and hid behind Christine.
"Don't worry..." The scarecrow gulped, "I-I-I'll protect y-you g-g- guys..."
Suddenly, a lion emerged from the bustling leaves. It was rather thin, and it didn't appear ferocious in the slightest manner... He was actually quite cowardly looking. Standing on his hind legs, he extending his paws.
"Put 'em up! Put 'em up!" He ordered, his voice quivering. "Who's going to fight me first? Hmm? Hmm? I'll fight you all together if you want! I'll fight you with one paw tied behind my back. I'll fight you standing on one foot!"
Arching an eyebrow, Richard cleared his throat. Raoul simply blinked, as Christine tilted her head to one side.
"Pulling an axe out on me, eh?" The lion said nervously, eyeing Firmin's axe. "Sneaking up on me, eh?"
"No..." Richard answered the ridiculous questions stiffly.
In the midst of an elaborate bath, Ayesha hissed at the neurotic animal.
"I'll get you, too, you little pip squeak!" The lion roared – well, it was more of a tiny growl, but in his mind it was a fierce roar – and began to towards the cat; Ayesha simply stood there, unfazed by his ineffective threat.
Christine gasped and slapped the lion's paws. "Shame on you!" Scooping up the cat, she didn't even notice that she had disrupted Ayesha's bath. The cat limply sat in her arms, irritated that she would have to groom herself again.
The lion sobbed, backing away with a terrified expression on his face. "W-what did you do that for? You're so mean! And heartless!"
"Actually," Richard pointed out matter-of-factly, "I'm the heartless one."
"You're a big bully!" The girl declared, stomping her foot like a stubborn child.
The lion grabbed his nose. "You hit hard! Is my nose bleeding?" He asked Raoul, darting up to him and sticking his nose directly in the scarecrow's face.
"Why would it be bleeding?" Christine questioned, confused. "I didn't hit you in the nose!" Sighing, she blew a blonde curl from her face. "Are you all right?"
"Oh, no, not at all. You have nothing to worry about." The scarecrow assured him, both ignoring the girl's comments and question. "I'm Raoul, by the way."
"Nice to meet you, Raoul! My name is Andre Moncharmin." The lion replied courteously, "Just call me Moncharmin, please."
Christine's face turned a shade of purple and red – not a very calm or appealing color. She was exasperated. No one had been listening to her. Everything was strange here, and she only slapped this lion's paws; now, he was actually inquiring if his nose was bleeding! Why in the world would his nose be bleeding??? Agitated beyond belief, she trudged into the woods, while six eyes followed her.
"I am so... perturbed!" She screeched. Her scream was followed by a series of numerous shrieks; many were in different octaves.
"Perturbed?" Raoul echoed.
Moncharmin stifled a laugh. "That's a funny word."
"It's far too big for her vocabulary anyway." Richard nodded in agreement, and all three of them waited in silence until the girl returned.
"Better?" Raoul asked, leaning against a tree.
"Much, thank you." She sighed, turning to Moncharmin. "What did you say your name was?"
"Moncharmin."
"Why, you're not ferocious at all!" Christine beamed, patting him on the head. "You're quite cute, too!" She glared over her shoulder at Richard, sticking her tongue out. "I told you lions were cute."
Richard rolled his eyes, approaching the lion. "You're nothing but a coward." He simply stated, yawning.
The young Parisian looked aghast, but the lion nodded. "I don't have any courage at all." He mournfully explained. "I even scare myself... Look at the circles under my eyes. I haven't slept in weeks."
"Try counting sheep." Richard suggested, rubbing his tin neck.
"That doesn't do any good – I'm afraid of them."
"What about bunnies?" Christine proposed brightly. "That always works for me!"
Moncharmin's eyes broadened as he trembled.
"What did I say?"
"Not the bunnies..." He whispered, swallowing and looking back at the dark forest.
There was an awkward silence until Richard cleared his throat.
"You seem to do that a lot." Raoul pointed out, but rapidly changed the subject when he was met with a glare. "Moncharmin, maybe the Phantom could help you! Don't you think, Christine?"
After a few moments of silence, they all turned to see Christine halfway in the woods, singing softly. "In sleep he sang to me... In dreams he came..."
Richard cleared his throat again, causing the girl to scurry out of the woods and Raoul to stare at him.
"What did you say?" She asked dumbly, a smile painted on her face.
"He suggested that Moncharmin come with us to get courage from the Phantom." The tin man explained dully.
"Actually," The scarecrow furrowed his brow, " I said 'maybe the Phantom could help'! I was thinking he could maybe invent an animal that Moncharmin wasn't so afraid of so he could have something to count to sleep at night!"
Everyone silently blinked as Raoul beamed proudly. Christine's eyes up as she bounced up and down. "I have an idea! He can get some courage from the Phantom of Oz!"
Richard heaved a sigh, throwing his hands up in the air.
"Really?" Moncharmin questioned hopefully, biting his lip.
"Yep!"
"Well, wouldn't you feel degraded to be seen in the company of a cowardly lion?" He lowered his eyes to the ground, shuffling his feet.
"Degraded? That's a large word..." She blankly stared at him, but her eyes suddenly grew larger.
"A lion? Where?!" Richard patted her on the back empathetically before giving a reassuring smile to the lion. "My life has been simply unbearable..." He despondently stated, taking in a deep breath. He began to sing, "Yeah, it's sad, believe me, Missy, when you're born to be a sissy..."
Sighing softly, Christine began to resume her journey to the Onyx City.
"Wait! Wait!" Called Moncharmin, puzzled at why no one was hanging on his every musical note.
"Don't bother." Raoul said listlessly. "She won't listen. She's always going to be too good for Oz music."
"Yes, she likes 'opera'." Richard added, rolling his eyes. "Look at me!" He began to mock Christine, "I'm a blonde ditz who likes OOOOPERAAAA!" As he began to dance around, one of his legs and one of his arms rusted, and they became stuck in an unusual position. One arm managed to wrap itself around the back of his head, and his leg was sticking straight up – just like a flamingo.
"Oh." The lion sniffled.
Linking arms with Moncharmin and Raoul, Christine skipped merrily down the Yellow Brick Road, ignoring Richard. Swiftly, Raoul grabbed Richard, dragging him in that uncomfortable position until Christine finally oiled his leg and arm.
"We're off to see the Phantom! The Wonderful Phantom of Oz! We hear he is a spook of a ghost, if ever a ghost there was! If ever, oh ever a ghost there was! The Phantom of Oz is one because... Because, because, because, because, because, because of the wonderful things he does! We're off to see the Phantom! The Wonderful Phantom of Oz!"
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The images of Christine, Ayesha, Moncharmin, Richard, and Raoul grow smaller as they are displayed on a crystal ball. Suddenly, their images disappear."DANG EET!" Carlotta screeched. "I knew a $1.99 deal on zis dumb crystal ball vas too good to be true!"
She furiously threw it to the ground, where it shattered into various pieces, landing beside the broom that had been tackily taped together. Emitting an aggravated sigh, Carlotta returned her attention to the matter of Christine and her new friends.
"So! You von't take my warning, eh? All ze vorse for you, zen... I'll take care of you now eenstead of later! Hah! Ven I gain those ruby slippers, my power vill be ze greatest een Oz! And now, my beauties! Zomething vith poison een it, I think. Vith poison een it, but attractive to ze eye and soothing to ze smell!" She rubbed her chubby chin thoughtfully.
"Actually, Miss Wicked Witch of the West," Came a wry voice, "It would be something 'soothing to smell' not 'something to the smell'..."
"Shut up, Reyer!" She shrieked deafeningly at her main flying monkey.
"All right! Okay! I'm sorry!" He apologized profusely, cowering in the corner, lowering the volume of his voice. "Just, please, please, please, don't sit on me again..."
Rolling her eyes and sighing haughtily, Carlotta tapped the plastic 'crystal ball'. After a few minutes of her cursing and screaming at the cheap item, the image of the four travelers returned.
"Hmmm... Vat has poison een it, but iz attractive to ze eye and soothing TO SMELL?" She pondered, throwing a glare at Reyer. Abruptly, Carlotta straightened up, beginning to cackle. "Poppies! Poppies! Poppies! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
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"There's the Onyx City!!!" Christine exclaimed, pointing to a large, black city, but soon ceased her bouncing. "It's really... black.""...That's why it's called the 'Onyx City'..." Richard said, staring at her incredulously. He silently wondered if she was the one who needed a brain.
She tilted her head while staring at it. "Although, it does have this strange beauty to it..." She murmured distantly, before snapping back into reality. "He really must be a phantastic phantom to live in a city like that!"
"Well, what are we waiting for?" Moncharmin inquired, anticipating the moment when he would receive his courage.
"Nothing! Let's hurry!" Raoul exclaimed, tripping over his feet.
"Yes, let's!"
They swiftly scurried across a poppy seed field towards the Onyx City, but in the midst of their dash, Christine began to feel lightheaded. The girl felt exceedingly tired, and it was as if she couldn't keep her eyelids open anymore; she felt happy at the exact same time.
"I can't run anymore... I'm too sleepy..." She yawned, slowly dropping to her knees.
"It's okay!" Raoul declared, taking her hands. "We'll carry you along!"
"Oh, no... Just let me rest for a little bit please..." She told them, "And, please... NO singing..." She sat up straight again. "Ayesha? Where's Ayesha?"
Ayesha slept soundly, sprawled out among the poppies. She snored softly, her tail twitching back and forth. Content to know that her cat was safe, Christine gracelessly plopped to the ground in a heavy sleep.
"Oh, no! You can't sleep now, you little ditz!" Richard sighed, exasperated.
"Christine!" Raoul yelled, shaking her by the shoulders.
"You know... forty winks wouldn't be that bad..." Moncharmin said thoughtfully before slowly lying down to sleep.
"Oh, no – don't you start, too!" The tin man exclaimed, crossing his arms.
"Come on! You guys can't sleep in the middle of a FIELD!" The scarecrow groaned.
The two men – err, well – the scarecrow and tin man both ceased their pleading as they listened to Christine's sleep talk. They furrowed their brows as she mentioned something about mirrors, strange men, and angels.
"Christine!!!" They resumed their begging. "Wake up!"
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"Call away! Call away! She von't hear any of you again! And zere's nothing you can do about eet, either!" Carlotta cackled, plopping down into a chair. "Reyer! Reyer?"
Her call was answered with a muffled reply. Confused, she looked down only to realize that she had indeed sat on her monkey.
"Reyer, quit being lazy! Call ze rest of ze vinged monkeys to fetch me zose slippers! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Eet vorked very smoothly!" She scolded him, rising from her position in the chair.
Muttering something about being exploited and needing a better job, Reyer flew off to round up the other monkeys.
"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" She laughed wickedly, knocking the crystal ball of the table. "Dang eet!"
Giving some money to another monkey, she sent him to the store to buy another plastic crystal ball. The Witch tapped her foot impatiently, stealing a glance at her watch.
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"Christine!" Raoul sobbed, sitting beside the girl. "Why did you have to go?"
"For the thousandth time, she's not dead." Richard moaned, rubbing his temple. "She's asleep."
"Oh... then why are we so worried? A nap sounds good."
"NO! Not now. Don't you start, too!"
Raoul placed his chin in his palm, emitting a loud sigh. The tin man rolled his eyes, fiddling with a poppy. The scarecrow glanced at Richard, sighing even louder. Ignoring this evident need for him to ask the scarecrow what was on his mind, the tin man continued to pretend to be in deep thought. Raoul noisily sighed a third time and then cleared his throat.
"WHAT?" Richard finally yelled, breaking the poppy in half.
Wide-eyed, the scarecrow gulped. "I just think it's too quiet. That's all."
Throwing the useless poppy to the ground, Richard restrained himself from screaming very loudly. Something unexpectedly came to the tin man's mind as he turned on his heel to face Raoul.
"This is a spell! It's a spell done by that nasty Wicked Witch of the West!" He concluded, arching an eyebrow.
Raoul shrugged, shuffling his feet. "Oh! You know what I just figured out???"
"What?" "This must be a spell done by that Wicked Witch of the West woman!" He grinned, placing his straw hands on his hips.
Growling, Richard clenched his teeth. "How observant of you."
"I know." He beamed proudly.
"HELP! HELP!" The tin man began to scream.
"Oh! You're smart! You're calling for help so we can be safe from the Wicked Witch!" Richard stared at him, mumbling, "Actually, I was calling for help so someone could take me away from you..."
Ignoring this statement, Raoul began to call for help, too. "HELP! HELP! SOMEONE, HELP!!"
Staring up, they caught the sight of Meg, the Good Witch of the North. She giggled playfully and happily waved her wand around, creating a bottle of Coca-Cola. Taking a sip, Meg waved her wand around again, causing it to snow.She waved perkily, before disappearing.
"Bubye!" She blew a kiss, her form slowly vanishing.
They shivered.
"She could have at least given us some jackets." Raoul muttered, wrapping his arms around him. "Hey, look! It's working! They're waking up!"
((A/N: if someone could fill me in on how snow helped Dorothy and them to wake up from the poppy seeds and everything... that would be wonderful . Yes, yes, I am a blonde, but oh well. I'm a confused one. Thanks!))
"Hey... it's snowing." Moncharmin stated, yawning and stretching his arms.
"It's cold!" Christine exclaimed, hugging the lion. "You have fur so you're warm!"
Prying Christine off of him, the lion stood, embarrassed. The girl bounced up, feeling quite refreshed from her nap.
"Well, I feel so much better!" She laughed lightly, picking up Ayesha because she too had fur and was warm to cuddle with. "Let's go! The Onyx City is so close!"
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"Curse eet! Curse eet! Curse Meg! Somebody alvays helps zat girl!" Carlotta stomped her feet, causing the entire castle to shake.
Reyer sauntered into the room, clutching at the walls when the floor began to shake. "You probably shouldn't stomp around like that, your evilness..."
She paid no attention to the monkey as she crossed her arms indignantly. "But shoes or no shoes, I'm still great enough to conquer her. And woe to zose who try to stop me!"
The Witch cackled, but caught a piece of dust in her mouth, causing her to cough.
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A/N: Please, R&R!