Pleione – No he hasn't, his life has been madness from his birth. And to tell you the truth, I feel sorry for him :)

Thanks again rosiegirl and "Colin Mochre is hot"

DJ Rodriguez – This is bad indeed, the reason for the fanfic, to show a worse case possible scenario, and it is dark yes, especially his cell, I like dark fics (and music) for some reason, oh a glimmer of light, not yet I'm afraid, but soon, really soooon, patience my young fan, patience! The red line throughout the story is just how Harry will cope with all this happening to him, how will he ever return (or get) to an almost normal life after all this happening to him?

Oh, funny detail about the beginning of this chapter, what I used when writing about Harry's symptoms now, except for the pain, that with vomiting and everything rotating. Hrm, when I was really really drunk for the first time in my life (it was actually a really fine and luxurious vodka-brand, perfect when mixed with sprite or 7up), it was a rellay interesting thing to live through actually. First I laughed at everything, but then everything rotated, and I really mean rotated, I was surprised that it could rotate THAT much, again again and again, never stopping. Not the easiest thing to get to the bathroom and drink water though I succeded with that task. And then I felt like vomiting, which I did, which probably helped me getting some of the alcohol out, while I drank water, feeling finer again (that is, feeling fine the next morning again). Don't despair though, I promised myself to never drink too much again and have so far not broken that promise (and I've been on numerous parties since then). Enough with this babble and more fanfic, read. Read! READ!

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Harry slowly opened his eyes, it was still dark.

"What happened?"

Slowly he started to feel his surroundings, the cold rocks, and then something crept up, immense pain. Like he still had the Cruciatus on him but in a way weaker. He screamed loud, rolled around, wanting it to stop, to get out of there. Harry crept up in a courner of his cell and lied like a small ball as the pain subsided and a distinct ache stayed. He felt terribly dizzy, cold, sweaty and thirsty and he was shivering.

Suddenly the door opened, a dark silhoutte walked into the room. Everything was rotating he noticed now when he could see something. He didn't care about that guard standing there, he needed to vomit now.

Trying unsuccesfully to crawl on all four to the "toilet", he just fell over on his side again and vomited there straight on the floor.

The man placed a tray on the floor and walked over to Harry who could now see that it was Marforn, his guard. He took out a hand and Harry tried to prepare for a kick, hit or a bit Cruciatus but felt too sick to do anything at all but moaning. He wasn't beaten though but felt a cold hand placed on his forehead.

"Really hot, these aftereffects are really nasty" he said and brought out a small bottle from his pocket. "Drink this and your fever will go down"

"And if I refuse?" Harry whispered really quietly. Death was just another escape route for him now.

"Then I will force you. You won't die by your own free will here, the Dark Lord decides when you shall die." he said while opening the small bottle. He then grabbed Harry's hair and forced his head back and pressed the opening of the bottle into his mouth where the bad tasting liquid ran out. As soon as some of the liquid was in Harry's mouth Marforn forced his mouth closed and roughly pulled his body up some and pressed his head back some more, trying to force Harry to swallow it. He had no strengths at all to resist and felt how the liquid went down as he swallowed it.

Slowly he stopped freezing and instead felt rather hot and sweaty. But the room continued to rotate and he continued to feel dizzy.

As Marforn left the cell and closed the door Harry crept together into a small ball again, trying to ease the rotating which he noticed was slowly subsiding. Leaving an annoying ache all over his body together with the exhaustion.

He crept over to the food, pulled a blanket over his bare shoulders and started eating. The food was the same crap as every other time, he didn't know how often he got food, but it wasn't often enough, just to keep him alive.

Time passed, days passed, probably weeks too. They took him out several more times. Once when he had eight lines on the wall. That time was terrible, they placed him in the middle of the torture-chamber. Tied his hands behind his back, his legs and his arms to his body. Then they forced him down on his knees. One of them, probably Crabbe or Goyle, started to hit and kick him. He refused to say anything though.

He knew this time that they would just want him to say more anyway and continue to beat him.

The taste of blood stayed in his mouth for a long time after that. Broken ribs were healed the next time he was given food and probably some internal wounds too.

Next time he was tortured was when he had fourteen lines on the wall. This time they placed him on the table again. Before beginning Bellatrix explained that they had been busy for several days. She also read an article from the Daily Prophet.

"'Harry Potter's body (the Boy-Who-Lived) has been found. No reporters were able to get photos of it but witnesses reports that it is severely wounded and had been dead for about a week according to healers. Friends of Harry Potter still refuses to comment but Harry's girlfriend, Hermione Granger, was seen running away crying. Mr Weasley, father of Ronald Weasley shouted to reporters "Get the bloody hell away from us and leave us alone!"' "

"They still thinks she's my girlfriend" Harry thought for a short time while hearing the article.

They also told him that they had attacked a muggle family, among many other attacks. Parents, one 18 year-old daughter and one 16 year-old son were all killed and the house was burned. But they took the boy's body and transfiguered him a bit so he looked like Harry, then they half buried the body somewhere so someone found it.

Everything felt competely hopeless for Harry after hearing these things. But then Bellatrix started playing around with the knives lying on the small table. She explained to him that these knives, much like the whip, delievered pain throughout the whole body. It also left scars and could only be healed by the same painful charm as with the whip.

That was one of the most terrible experiences Harry had ever been through, she didn't go deep though, just cutting in his arms, on his chest and stomach. He was afraid that those scars would stay forever. As well as those on his back.

He had lost all hope of rescue by this time and was left alone in his cell for some time again.

Next time they took him out he had 18 lines on the wall. This time he got a grave beating too. He couldn't move nor sleep those hours afterwards until Marforn came in again, gave him food and roughly healed him. Not all wounds, just the most grave ones, leaving aches here and there and a broken rib.

It continued like this for Harry who wanted to die all the time but was never allowed. Once he even tried to drown himself in his soup but Marforn apparently was able to watch over him somehow even though the door was closed and locked.

Afterwards he was punished. The punishment wasn't that terrible in a way. His hands was now always tied to his back and he had a shackle around his neck, connected with the wall with a chain long enough to reach down to the floor.

When he got food they took off his ropes and watched over him as he ate. If he ate too slowly they would rush him and sometimes start feeding him. Needless to say he often spit out some food when they fed him too fast which resulted in a hit or a kick and that Harry got less food into his stomach.

Suddenly Harry heard the door opening again. He was lying on his back. He had a pain in his chest, legs and a nagging headache this day and also felt immensely hungry and thirsty. He had recieved a beating again yesterday. At least he thought it was yesterday, it felt like he was just recieving food once a day.

Marforn walked into the room again with the usual tray and the usual food and Harry prepared for the usual Cruciatus but didn't recieve any. Instead he heard how Marforn put down the tray and walked over to him. He was humming on something, like this was just another normal day and another normal work. Marforn started to examine Harry's wounds before saying anything.

"Well, I'll have to heal these wounds on your head, and some of the broken ribs I think, then you'll be able to eat just nicely".

He picked out his wand and said some incantations, giving relief to Harry from different pains, but the taste of blood stayed in his mouth.

Marforn then cut off Harry's ropes and went over to the other end of the room and watched him. Harry slowly crept over to the tray and started eating with shaky hands.

The Death Eaters were strangely kind today he noticed. No Cruciatus as he'd recieved almost every other day. Marforn had just healed him and let him eat as fast as he wanted. When Harry had finished eating Marforn went over to him again and tied his wrists before he left and all that was left was the candle light.

Harry crept over to the wall again and scratched in another line by holding the spoon in his mouth, sighing after he had counted them.

"34... why won't they let me rest... why did it have to be me of all kids in the whole world who'd be the one in the Prophecy? I just wanted to be a normal kid with his parents at home, having funny holidays, but noo, I had to live with the Dursleys. Recieving beatings and being mocked in school. What happened then, oh yes, Hagrid came and rescued me from them. I could almost get a normal kid's life again, as normal as it can be in a wizarding school. But noo, instead I was famous and got stared at. I also got enemies because I wasn't just another normal kid, because of something that happened to me which I had no control over. And friends of course, real friends at last. Life seemed to get into a good standard but noo, suddenly everyone thought there was a mad murderer after me, but he wasn't any murderer, it was my godfather and then ofcourse the real murderer and his "Lord" went after me that next year. And again everything went straight down, maybe it would've been best if he could've killed me that time. That way I wouldn't had to live through my fifth year, Sirius' death or this..."

He sat by the wall for maybe some hours, being angry at people and things they had done. Feeling sorry for himself. Soon he heard how the door opened and there were Death Eaters outside cell.

"Again?! Nooo, I'm still too wounded I can't take this any more" he thought as Death Eaters walked into his cell and took off the shackle around his neck, pulled him up and pushed him out of the room.

There were five of them, unusually many. And as Harry started walking with them a sudden pain in his chest and leg stopped him. He couldn't even stand up, had to sit down on his knee. He breathed hard, afraid of what they might do on to him for stopping. But they just dragged him on through the corridor by holding his arms.

They didn't take him to the torture chamber as all other times, they dragged him on to a corridor going to the right and then left through a bigger one to some big oak doors. He instantly recognised the sound from when they opened the doors and he also recognised the hall beyond it. It was the throne room and there on his throne was Voldemort sitting with his snake Nagini lying besides on the floor, pain instantly erupted in his scar. "What's going on?" Harry wondered.

They dragged him in, dropped him in the middle of the hall and joined the circle of Death Eaters that was forming around him. The circle was a lot bigger than it was in the graveyard more than a year ago.

Unable to stand Harry stayed lying on the floor but noticed how an opening formed where Voldemort entered the circle. It quickly closed when he had entered.

"Are they finally going to kill me? Or does he just want to torture me personally?"

Voldemort started laughing, a cruel, icy and harsh laughter. Harry closed his eyes and held in a scream of pain, pain which had just intensified in his scar.

"Again Harry, are you within this circle. And again are you just a mere wreck. Instead of being tied to a tombstone you lie there. Unable to stand up to meet your greatest fear face to face." he walked closer to Harry while taking out his wand "You know, Bellatrix has reported to me that she was successfull with breaking down your mental health. I wanted you to be broken before I killed you. Yes Harry, today is the day when you will finally be able to rest, meet your long lost parents, be in a happy state of death. And I will finally win forever, I will make sure that your friends will soon accompany you in death too."

He laughed quietly for himself, leaned over and put his wand right above Harry's forehead, pointing straight at his scar. The pain was terrible but Voldemort's whispering voice pierced right through it.

"Now Harry, just one more thing. I want you to cry, cry like a baby, I want you to fear me, to be really broken. Just this small favour and I will let you rest."

"He's really mad if he thinks I'm gonna do that for him, hell no"

"Never" Harry whispered. After the beating yesterday his voice was almsot gone (as it had been some other times during the last weeks). If he talked too loud it hurt in his throat and all that would come out was a craxing sound.

"You are really stubborn Harry" Voldemort said as he stood up again. "But I had foreseen this impossible charade of yours and we have means to stop it."

He made a sign with his hand and the circle opened where the door was located. Two Death Eaters went over to it and opened.

The room instantly filled with a terrible chill as a Dementor slowly floated into the room. Harry started to hear in a distance the voice of his mother screaming.

"You have already met some of these faboulus creatures Harry, so I will go straight to the point. If you do not fear nor cry then this Dementor will come closer and perform the kiss on you. You have two choices, die peacefully or forever have your soul stolen from you. You cannot imagine what pains a soul sucked by a Dementor have to live through forever Harry."

"Nooo, not this, why do I always have to be given two choices where I like neither..."

"What will it be Harry?"

The Dementor slowly floated closer and closer, the screams intensified with the cold.

"Nooo, not this" Harry said quietly. "Just kill me and let it be over with."

Voldemort laughed, he seemed to be uneffected by the Dementor, actually most Death Eaters seemed uneffected by the Dementor. Those showing signs of being affected just backed off a little. Some was even laughing with Voldemort when seeing Harry's expression of despair.

Screams got louder, Harry could hear Voldemort's laughter both in his mind and outside. He was fading. "Nooo, if I fade then all is lost, please God no"

Even if he didn't want it, tears started leaking out, again had his captors reached a top of what Harry could withstand. He was terrified, they really had broken him down to a wreck, both physicly and mentally.

"No, not this" He whispered and accidently let out a sob. The Dementor stopped. Voldemort turned back to watch Harry's face. His smile broadened.

"This is madness..."

Voldemort walked over to Harry again and put his wand straight above Harry's scar again.

"You should not be sad Harry" he said and some more Death Eaters laughed shortly.

"Crucio"

This was worse than ever. It felt like his scar would break and rip open his body as the burning pain throughout his body felt like it was transforming him into ashes. Needless to say Harry screamed as loud as he could of the pain while he rolled around, away from Voldemort and landed on his stomach. At last the curse was removed. Laughter went through the hall.

Voldemort was walking around Harry while speaking.

"You may wonder why I did not kill you at once. Well, to tell you the truth, I wanted some enjoyment. To break you as I said earlier. You can not imagine how nice it is to fall asleep to the screams of one of your greatest enemies, echoing through the corridors. But then I noticed what date was coming up, and you were already broken and had refused to say anything useful. So I decided that on this day you would die. At the same time as your friends have just arrived at Hogwarts and are enjoying a feast."

"Is he saying that this is the 1st september? Have I been here over a month?"

Voldemort stopped walking, he was standing between Harry and his throne. But Harry didn't care about looking around, he was just lying there on his side, with his knees up to his stomach and his head down. His body aching from the Cruciatus and the pain in his chest, painfully reminding him of his broken rib.

He was thinking about his friends again, how they must feel about believing he had been dead for more than a month. Sitting there trying to have fun. Wondering if Dumbledore had mentioned him in his speech.

"Any last words Harry?" Voldemort asked.

"Any last words... I have something"

"Yeah... Damn you all... to hell" Harry managed to say quietly between breaths.

They all started to laugh, cruel and harshly. When it died down Voldemort took up his wand again and pointed it at Harry.

"Avada kedavra"

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Sleep Eden sleep
My fallen son
Slumber in peace

Cease the pain
Lifes just in vain
For us to gain
Nothing but all thesame

No healing hand
For your disease
Drinking scorn like water
Cascading with my tears

Beneath the candle bed
Two saddened angels - in heaven, in death

Now let us lie
Sad we lived sad we die
Even in your pride
I never blamed you

A mothers love
Is a sacrifice
Together sleeping
Keeping it all
/From "Two for Tragedy" by Nightwish

A/N I gotta say that those lyrics are so terribly great, I mean "Sad we lived sad we die" screams Harry Potter, or "A mothers love, Is a sacrifice" makes me think of when Lily sacrificed herself for Harry, used her love to save him. And don't worry (actually my first big cliffhanger) next chapter comes in tomorrow again ofcourse. A/N