A/N I'm sorry for the last chapter which I myself thought was rather sucky, but important, so far I guess you all are wondering why people are doing like they are doing stuff and all that, but things will get clear soon :)

And I gotta apologize if you think it's getting way too dark (and thus silly), the light is coming, as the singer in Stratovarius just sang in this song I'm listening to right now "but all will be okay" in the song called "Liberty". I promise you all that it will get shinier soon but still angst. The story has been stuck for the last two chapters with no progress actually, but the progress will come crashing down hard like a meteor soon with a bit of patience.

Hmm, though I had something more to say, doesn't seem like that.... except that I finally got the big mechanics-test back today, and I was victorious! Weeh! Able to put a majority of my energy on the math these next weeks instead, at last. I'm a happy student now, x-mas closing on, one of two big tests finished and parties soon too. I'll have time to start on a new fanfiction soon too. Also in the Harry Potter-world though but really different from most of the fictions I've seen so far.

If it wasn't for all the games coming out now though, gotta play them too :)

Anyway, enjoy the chapter now, and another comment, REVIEW! Please, forgotten to say that in most chapters.... which reminds me that I should write some reviews too. Only fair.

READ! I command ye.

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"Green..."

Harry saw, as in slowmotion, how the green flash from Voldemort's wand came closer. Voldmort's smile behind it. Memories from the past also flashed through Harry's mind in this small part of a second. Even things he didn't remember, his parents, wizards he met even before he knew about the Wizarding world. Friends smiling, he being happy with them, him holding the quidditch cup in school. Sirius' smile.

Then the green flash hit him, right in his face. But something was wrong, he didn't just die and lie there with the surprised expression.

Harry could feel the curse hitting him, going into him, putting itself around his heart and brain. But it couldn't get in and stop them. It was pushed away. Suddenly there was pain around his heart and in his head. Green flashes jumped from between his fingers, arms, body, even in his mouth between his tongue and teeths. A green fog seemed to put itself over Harry's eyes. He twitched around, screaming. worst was it in the region around and in his scar. Suddenly he felt another feeling, something he had had there for a long time, ever since his mother died. The protection she put on him with her last strengths, her love for him went strong again. The same love he had felt for every other living being. The curse was pushed away with full force, it flew out from him straight at Voldemort. But he was prepared and was able to jump out of the way. The curse hit the wall over the throne and blew off some rocks.

Harry himself fell limply onto the floor. He couldn't move, speak or do anything but lying there motionless, not even moving his eyes. But he felt how his body breathed and could feel an aching all over his body, he also heard the astounded silence in the hall. He noticed in the courner of his eyes how Nagini crawled towards him.

"This can't possibly be death" he thought.

Voldemort quickly came around and walked back into the circle of Death Eaters whom were talking to eachother, wondering what just happened, wondering if Harry was dead.

"It is not possible.." Voldemort said. "This can not be, the protection cannot still be there..."

Harry felt how Nagini crept up on him and put her body around Harry's body. Resting her head on his head, if he had been awake he'd thrown he off quicker than he catched a Snitch.

Bellatrix took of her hood and mask and went up to Voldemort, kneeling in front of him on one knee.

"What is it my Lord? Is he dead? What happened?" she asked.

"This has happened once before, 15 years ago when I tried to kill him last time" he answered. "But that time I was not prepared for the curse jumping right back at me. No, he is not dead, he is just unconsciouss."

Voldemort walked closer to Harry and seemed to be deep in thought. Nagini lifted her head and hissed as he walked closer. Then she started to slither her tongue on Harry's face. Like she was tasting him.

"This is something important, the old protection put on him by his mother is still there, protecting him from the Killing Curse. This is useful, we cannot kill him yet. We need to find out a way to get this power out of him. In the meantime we will keep him in his cell. Put a Dementor outside to keep him calm but remove it when the boy gets food. He must stay alive. For now anyway, but I fear that we will not be able to get the protection from him quick enough. A few weeks maybe, then we will kill him in a more crude way. Leaving him with Nagini perhaps. We will see, but now we got work to do, much work. You, you and you" he hissed as he pointed on three Death Eaters.

"Take care of this mess." He then left the room and Nagini crept after him as the Death Eaters scattered, the three Voldemort pointed out walked up to Harry and dragged his body back to his cell.

He noticed while they dragged him through the corridors how his control over his body returned, fingers, eyes, mouth, feets. And as they throw him back into his cell he felt how he could move his arms again. He also felt something wet on his forehead. Like water had been running down from it. He noticed that it was his scar which was bleeding. It felt like someone was banging his head with a huge rock.

He noticed how he started to feel lonely again. He could have died there, his hell could have been over forever. No more people watching his scar. No more people, prophecies or anything controlling his life. No more pain and no more losing people close to him. Just peace and quiet. But now he didn't get all this. He was just back to his cell again.

"In a way" he thought. "I've always been in a cell. Never been allowed to do anything. Always had to live with the Dursleys to be safe, had to stay in Hogwarts to be safe, always under surveillance. Because they wanted me to stay alive, but they never saw what I wanted. Normality, peace, freedome. So what if I died, I didn't chose to become the "Chosen One" or whatever they want to call it. I always saw what other people needed, wanted and tried to give it to them. But did they ever tried to see for my needs? It's unfair, if I wanted to die because there is no more for me in this life, so what? Nothing I want, like freedome and the ability to chose what I want to do with my life would I ever get in this life. I just want to die peacefully. Get what I want... Damn it's freezy in here"

Harry was really freezing now, it has never been cold like this in his cell. But then he remembered what Voldemort said. 'Put a Dementor outside to keep him calm'. Harry suddenly heard his mother screaming, Voldemort laughing, a green flash, everything got dim.

Sirius was falling through the veil, Harry tried to save him but was stopped. His mother was killed, a harsh laughter then one more green flash. Ginny was lying lifeless in the Chamber of Secrets. Harry fell from his broom towards a sea of Dementors. He was holding Sirius and trying to protect him from the hundreds of Dementors coming by the lake. Sirius was falling through the veil. His mother was leaning over him, crying again, screaming to another one, a man with red eyes and a chilly laughter. Again he saw him, standing infront of him in his throne room. Then on a graveyard. Harry was on the ground again, but in the graveyard now, and Cedric lay dead besides him. Harry's arm was cut and his blood was poured into the Cauldron. Voldemort rose again. Sirius fell through the veil. His mother screamed.

After some hours the sights kind of floated together. They went on and on. But Suddenly his consciousness returned. It wasn't as freezing anylonger. Not that Harry was happy about the absence of the Dementor, the visions just reminded him about how much he wanted to die again. And was still unable to die.

The door opened, a Death Eater entered with a tray and the same food again.

"Eat" he said. It was Marforn again.

"Kill me..." Harry said quietly but knew it was in vain. If Marforn killed him then he would suffer greatly by Voldemort before dying himself. So again Harry had no choice and crept over to the food. He ate under the surveillance of Marforn who probably watched in case he would attempt suicide again. When he finished eating Marforn went over to the tray and kicked Harry out of the way.

Harry groaned and crept in under his blankets as Marforn picked up the tray and started to walk out. Harry thought about begging to be without the Dementor, but hesitated too long. The door closed and darkness consumed Harry again. Soon the cold returned together with the pictures while he faded again.

He didn't care about scratching in lines anylonger in the wall, didn't care about time at all. Nor anything from the outside world the next days. Nothing mattered as he lay there remembering all the worst parts from his life, which were many. Too many and too terrible. And sometimes he got food. He didn't really know how long he had been like this when the door opened again and two Death Eaters came in and dragged him out. It could have been a month, a week, two months, anything.

They dragged him into the torture chamber again and Harry was too weak to do anything at all. He hadn't really eaten so much those times he got food. And the rest of the time he was just lying in his cell, fainted. He could only imagine how he must look, paler and skinier than ever.

The Death Eaters put him down on one of the tables and locked his wrists and ankles in the shackles. He lazily looked around and noticed some spots of old blood, probably his blood from those times Bellatrix had cut him with knifes.

His arms he noticed now when being out from the cell did have scars on them. Lines in different directions, he also noticed something he had almost forgotten. His right hand still had the scars from the detentions with Umbridge one year ago. So many scars everywhere.

Harry looked around some more. Bellatrix, Rodolphus and Lucius were there. He felt dizzy with the lack of food and water, couldn't really lock his eyes on any of them and just tried to lie back. Rest somehow on the hard wooden table.

"You don't look to well baby-Potter" Bellatrix said with a grin, the others laughed loudly. Rodolphus had one of his arms around her waist.

"Noo, not well at all, I suspect that you need some more treatment" he said with a laugh.

"Not again..."

"You may want to try that new charm you found Bellatrix" Lucius said, like he tried to sieze control over the torture. Bellatrix looked up, smirking at him and walked over to Harry's right leg, placing her wand over it. Harry tried to look down but was too tired to see exactly what she did.

She flipped her wand in the air somehow and then hit the middle of the part above the knee of Harry's right leg. There was a crack and immense pain as the bone broke. Harry screamed out loudly.

"Why... did you do that... you didn't even... ask any questions" He managed to say between breaths and when holding in moans.

"Oh you see baby-Potter-" Bellatrix started to say but was interrupted by Lucius.

"That we are leaving soon for some missions, war takes time. And there won't be a Dementor outside your cell for a few days. So to keep you calm we... immobilises you" he said. "Some guards will of course remain, so even if you are not able to do anything, try not to escape anyway."

Bellatrix didn't seem to be finished yet because she walked over to Harry's left side and put her wand over his left arm.

"Can't you just... tie me or... something? He asked.

"Well yes, little baby-Potter, but this is soo much more fun" Bellatrix answered as they all laughed. She then did the same thing with her wand and hit his left arm above his elbow. There was a crack and more pain. Harry had to hold his jaw tight shut not to scream or groan. All that was let out was some moans, sweat and some tears.

Bellatrix walked over to his right side and did the same thing on his right arm. This time Harry wasn't able to hold in his screams and the Death Eaters laughed some more. Like they were watching a comedian telling some silly jokes.

"You scream too much baby-Potter" Bellatrix suddenly said as she instead put her wand over his throat. "I found this curse in a book, it reminds me of the Silencio Charm but is more... fun" She put the wand's end to Harry's throat before chanting some words.

"No wait" Harry said.

"Silencio-Cruciotos-Maximus"

"Stop" he tried to say but all that came out was a craxing sound, a cough together with a little blood. It hurt when trying to talk and the cough felt like it had razors in it.

"Pain, pain pain, everywhere pain, stop it goddamnit!"

"Don't worry boy" Rodolphus said. "It will heal in time, maybe some weeks, just don't say anything. That will just give you more wounds."

"You won't even live that long anyway" Lucius continued.

Suddenly Harry saw how Bellatrix made the bone-breaking charm again on his right arm, this time under his elbow instead of above. He tried to scream but all that came out was a long groan.

He remembered how he broke his arm in his second year, it wasn't so bad except that he had to spend a night with painfully regrowing the bones. But this was terrible. He was hungry, thirsty, dizzy, the surroundings seemed dim. Without knowing it he blacked out as he had done so many time before the last month.

He stood in a graveyard. Not tied though, but Voldemort was standing by his father's tombstone. He had ropes in his hands, prepared to tie Harry.

He looked around and saw Dumbledore stand maybe ten meters behind him.

"Come to me Harry and live safely, receive love and understanding" Dumbledore said.

"Come to me Harry, or I will come for you. And in either way you will receive pain, suffering and death but in the end you will get back to your parents and godfather." Voldemort said in a threatening voice. By him suddenly stood Sirius, James and Lily.

Harry looked uncertainly back to Dumbledore and by him stood several people, most of them in his own age. Ron, Hermione, Neville, Dean, Seamus, Ginny, the twins, Charlie, Bill, Mrs and Mr Weasley, Luna and more. But now he noticed how Draco and his two baboons also stood there among other Slytherins.

Always two choices and no freedome. One way gave love, pain and probably death. The other way gave pain and a certain death but then love. Before making up his mind Harry felt immense pain in his arms and right leg and couldn't stand up any more.

He opened his eyes, pitch black as usual. He was back in his cell. He could feel how the Death Eaters had put sticks and bandages to keep his arms and right leg straight but they had also tied his legs together. His hands were lying on his stomach with the wrists also tied together. He tried to make a sound but nothing came out. He started to feel more dizzy and unconsciouss again.

As he wondered what it was that woke him in the first place he heard a sound. A quiet clicking in the locks of the door. It wasn't someone opening with a key, someone was picking it open.

Suddenly the lock unlocked, the door opened quietly. People were standing outside. Harry could only see their profiles but he noticed that two of them crouched outside, pointing somekind of submachineguns to either end of the corridor. Two other walked inside and turned on somekind of flashlights.

"Muggles?" Harry thought before he lost even more consciousness.

The two persons inside his cell put their rifles on their backs and started to take equipment from their backpacks. Harry thought he saw that they had helmets, helmets and masks, somekind of wests and dark clothes.

"Vite" one of those in the corridor said. "quelqu'un vient"

Those inside his cell was building a stretcher with metalsticks and somekind of cloth. When finished they took Harry by his shoulders and feets and put him on it. But when lifting him the pain grew, unbearable, he tried to scream but still just a groan came out and he faded.

All Harry could remember from afterwards for a while were images. Sounds and smells. They were carrying him through the corridor. Someone, sounded like Marforn, screamed.

"Stop! Avada kedavra!"

There was some green light, someone jumped out of the way, panic, shouts like "Merde!" Gunfire and soon Marforn's dead body lying on the ground, blood running out from several wounds in his torso.

Metal hit the ground, smoke, they were running up some stairs. And then a picture which stuck itself in Harry's memory forever on. Stars and trees, even the moon. The fresh air, it was so nice, so fresh, so refreshing. The will to live started to return to Harry as they ran through somekind of forest in the night. Even though his broken bones hurt like hell it was so nice there. He wanted everything to stay like this forever but before he knew it they reached a somekind of black van. There were some letters on it that Harry didn't care about reading.

They ran in, carried him through the backdoor of the van and closed them while someone in the front started the engines and fastly drove away out on a road.

Harry noticed that all four were in the van and felt relieved that none of them had died.

They were taking off their masks and helmets as one of them put a hand on Harry's forehead.

"Calme, personne ne peuvent vous nuire maintenant"he said in a quick french as another cut of the ropes with a knife. But Harry couldn't understand a word of it. It felt calming though and soon Harry fell asleep even with all the pains. He somehow felt safe but he knew it was just an illusion. Though to be in peace for maybe one night after more than a month of hell made him happy.

A/N No lyrics in the end of this chapter though, felt like a good ending of this one, please review as I said in the beginning :) A/N