I have mentioned random, right? Because… random. This has nothing to do with the short from before. And it will have nothing to do with the short that comes after this. Random. Chaos.
Disclaimer: Not mine, not making any money off of this.
I'm not sure when it started, or when it came to the point where I could barely look at him without becoming short of breath. But it did start, and very quickly it reached that point.
It was impossible to believe that my former professor, my former mentor, could cause such… scandalous feelings and thoughts inside me. Soon, I didn't even have to have him in sight. Just the mere mention of his name would send me into a dizzy state of mind where I could barely function normally.
Remus Lupin.
Avoidance seemed to be the best precaution to prevent my feelings from becoming public. When he came in the room, I left. Politely, as politely as my intoxicated state would allow me. When he spoke, I responded with short, monosyllabic answers to prevent my tongue from tying itself into knots.
I'd like to think that he was the only one who noticed. That would have been nice, pleasant even. Even more pleasant if he hadn't noticed. But, he did. As he always noticed those little things about everyone.
"Why don't you talk to me, Hermione?" His voice was soft, hurt. I stared at a spot on the floor behind him, knowing that if I looked in his eyes I wouldn't be able to hold my ground.
"I know how you feel," he said slowly, deliberately. My heart stopped and my lungs tightened in my chest, refusing to inhale. He couldn't possibly mean....
"About me," he added, lowering his face so that I was looking at him instead of the floor. My eyes locked onto his and followed them as he straightened back up. A familiar heat rose in my chest and crawled up to my face. I stared, memorized by his eyes. It took me a while to realize that he had been speaking.
"What?" I questioned, knowing that I had not heard a word he had said.
He sighed patiently. "I said, Because of my position, of whom I am and who you are... I can never touch you." Not realizing what I was doing, I took a step towards him. "I can never return you embrace." Another step. "I can never make the first move." He was mere inches from me. "I can never say those words to you." I could smell the chocolate on his warm breath. "Do you understand?"
Perfectly.
I leaned forward, wrapping my arms around his neck. I pressed my body up against him. He clutched the desk he was leaning against, burying his face in my hair.
"But God, I want to."