Ron Weasley walked as fast as his long legs would carry him to the hospital wing. Heads turned in his direction as he swiftly rushed past each person crowding towards the dining hall, although none stopped to speak to him, each guessing correctly where he was heading, and some even moving to clear his path. The visit might mean that he would miss lunch, but food was the farthest thing from his mind at the moment. Up one flight of stairs, and another, turn left… and before he knew it, he had reached his intended destination. He stood silently in front of the door, now unsure of what to do, panting slightly from his quick-paced trip there. What would he say? He had been so anxious to come see her that he had completely forgotten the fact that he would have almost nothing to talk about that wouldn't seem awkward and uncomfortable. Should he apologize for not having come to see her sooner?
Having cleaned up quickly the day before when he had heard the news of visits being allowed and keeping up his neat appearance, he had finally earned his sister's approval as presentable. He immediately planned to see her during his lunch break, since he had classes all morning and afternoon, and after debating it over with himself, hastily bought her a small gift by owl-order.
So here he was. Outside the hospital wing. Separated from Cho only by a two-inch thick structure of wood. As easy to solve as turning the doorknob and going in… the conversation he would have to make once inside would be the difficult part. After torturing himself endlessly, this is where it could all either be made better or worse. Suddenly struck with an unexplainable sense of fear, he half-turned to run away when the door opened creakily and Madam Pomfrey emerged, having grabbed Marietta by the arm to force her to go to lunch after discovering her skipping classes. She seemed not to notice him as she brushed past him, the Ravenclaw giving verbal and physical protests, struggling to wriggle out of the nurse's surprisingly strong grip and return to her friend's side. He took advantage of this and slipped inside, the door being left ajar by their unexpected exit.
She was in the middle bed beside one of the windows through which the most sunlight was streaming in long beams to illuminate the entire room. The golden rays softly caressed her dark brown hair, revealing subtle highlights of brown and giving her an almost unearthly glow, as though she were an angel. He envisioned the bruise that must have formed on her side and winced, although Madam Pomfrey surely would have healed her so well that even an unsightly mark such as that would not be left behind. She was sitting straight up in her bed propped on two fat pillows, reading a book her friend had left behind for her to read, and smiling amusedly at something she had just read as well as at the uproar which had subsided with the removal of Marietta. She didn't look up as he slowly and noiselessly walked to her bed, each step costing him an effort as he silently battled his options. As he stopped at the foot of her bed, the happy smile disappeared and she seemed to hold her breath in anticipation. Her eyes had stopped their path down the pages and they seemed, instead, to stare at the book now, not really seeing and comprehending the words on the paper as every sense in her body became alert. She closed her eyes, and when she reopened them and looked over at him, they filled and began to shine with tears. And for once in the longest time, as so many other things had happened in that fashion ever since he had come into her life as an important figure, she was crying tears of joy.
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"Ron," she whispered, as though a louder tone of voice would make the spell break and he would disappear. A tear rolled down her cheek as she smiled once more, that beautiful expression that seemed to control whether or not the sun shone.
"Yes," he whispered back, seeming to feel the same way. He walked closer to her, setting down the small box, yet never breaking eye contact with her.
"Are- are you sure you're not a dream?" she said quietly, more to herself than to him.
"I'm real," he said, taking her hand and giving it a comforting squeeze. "I'm here,"
Her lips trembled and more tears swiftly coursed down her cheeks as she dropped the book and leaned over to hug him and cry uncontrollably into his shoulder. He was, of course, slightly startled, but unlike the uncomfortable feeling he had always felt whenever Hermione had done something similar, this felt familiar. It felt… right. Stroking her hair gently and holding her in a soothing embrace, he knew that he needed no words to express anything. Even if he was unsure about where they stood, relationship-wise, she was at least his friend, and he was there to comfort her and give her the support she needed.
All of the romantic gestures that they had done was all just part of the plan, part of the dangerous game that they had decided to play and risk the consequences of losing. That was certain. But they had both found something they hadn't been bargaining for along the way: a friendship. Whether or not it would blossom into love only time would tell…
"I'm sorry," she said presently, wiping her eyes and withdrawing from his arms. "I'm just so glad to see you… I thought that you'd be upset with me."
"Why?" he said, shocked. "I can't express how grateful I am to you,"
"I'm happy to hear that," she said. The grin on her face became even wider. "I wasn't sure when you didn't come to see me yesterday directly after I started seeing visitors. I began to think the worst after a while,"
He half-opened his mouth to speak, and thought better of what he was going to speak, saying instead, "I'm sorry about that… news didn't reach me until the hospital wing had been closed to all visitors,"
"Oh, it's all right," she said brightly, "as long as I know that you weren't avoiding me on purpose." As she paused, she took a glance down at his hand, which still had a firm hold on hers and both colored slightly as they drew their hands apart quickly. Searching desperately for something to say, she finally said, "So, how is your sister these days? I hear she's moved on to someone else… what's his name…? Ernie something or other from Hufflepuff,"
"Ernie Macmillan," he said automatically.
"Right! Him…"
"Yeah," he replied, not quite expecting, or enjoying, for that matter, this topic to surface.
"I take it you don't care for him as much as your sister does?" she said, arching an inquisitive eyebrow at the look of disgust on his face, which had lingered after he had said Ernie's name.
He snorted scornfully, saying, "Not quite."
She smiled and replied, "I always found him to be a very pushy person…"
He returned the smile, his expression now saying, "My sentiments exactly,"
"So," he started, "exactly how many visitors have you had?"
"When?" she said wearily. "Yesterday morning, afternoon, or this morning?"
"Just everyone," he said, looking surprised.
"At least a third of the school."
"You're joking,"
"No, if only I were," she said. She covered her mouth and yawned. "So," she began slyly, "how is Hermione?"
He shrugged and said, "All right, I suppose. She's been very quiet for the past few days…"
"And Harry…?"
"Has barely spoken to anyone since we got back inside the school after the game."
Both paused for a moment, not sure of what to say.
"You know who came to see me yesterday?" she said finally, carefully marking her place and putting her book on the table beside her bed.
"Who?"
"Michael,"
"What did the bloody prat want this time?"
"You'll never believe me if I tell you,"
"Try me,"
"He apologized to me,"
"What?!"
"Mm, yes. He said that he'd been horrid to me and that he was sorry about everything he'd done."
"I doubt he really is sorry," Ron muttered darkly, looking down at the floor.
"Well, he sounded sincere enough, so I forgave him." She said hesitantly.
"That's even less believable than him apologizing to you," he replied before saying, "Look, I'm sorry, Cho, but- he hurt my sister, and I don't trust him, that's all."
"I understand," she said, nodding and starting to feel the conversation take a darker turn.
"She acts like she didn't care," he continued, not sensing her discomfort, "but he was her first real boyfriend, of course she cares. I can't tell you how many nights I've walked downstairs to get a glass of water and hearing her crying herself to sleep. That's why I don't like her seeing anyone. She's not happy,"
"Her heart's broken," Cho said, going on for him. "He was the first one she ever completely trusted with it, and he broke that trust." At the surprised look on his face, she said, smiling, "It's not as uncommon as you may think it is, a broken heart. That's why she has been moving steadily along from boy to boy, trying to mend it hastily. Give it time. She'll be all right."
"Now," she said, ready to move on to another topic, "how fares our plan for revenge nowadays?"
"It's all right," he said with a shrug. "Like I've said, neither Harry or Hermione have spoken much in the past few days. I think they would come to see you if they could, but they just don't have the nerve right now."
"Really?" she said in mock surprise. "Surely the brave Harry Potter, true Gyrffindor through and through would be courageous enough to come see me and risk his pride,"
"No, I'm quite certain he's not going to come anytime soon, if he does at all, that is," he said, smiling.
"That's a shame; now I'll never be able to send him on that nice guilt trip I've been planning for a while without risking his anger. It would've been horrible for him, and yet so satisfying for me," she said lightly with a small sigh.
He laughed and said, "You're right about that. No doubt he'd hex you once you were no longer bed-ridden if you provoked him that way, gentleman though he may pretend to be,"
"Ah, well, I suppose an anonymous Howler with a disguised version of my voice will have to do," she replied amiably, adjusting her sitting position slightly.
"So, how long exactly are you going to be detained in here?"
"Another few days or so, to be safe." She rolled her eyes. "The way Madam Pomfrey goes on about getting plenty of rest and all that sort of thing, you'd think there was a Bludger waiting to attack me once I set foot outside the hospital wing."
"Sounds a bit like my mum," he said thoughtfully, leaning forward slightly and resting his head on his fist, looking at her, and yet finding it difficult to hold her gaze for more than a few seconds.
"Being an only child, my own mother's like that, except probably three times worse." She said.
"I've often wondered what it's like to be an only child," he replied.
"It's very… lonely, actually," she said truthfully. "Having your own personal space and not competing with anyone for attention is nice, I suppose, but I've always wondered what it would be like to have a large family with lots of siblings,"
"It's tiring every now and then…" he said, trailing off.
"I'm not sure about what size family I'd want when I'm married and I start thinking about children, though,"
"Me neither,"
They paused, taking yet another long uncomfortable pause in which no one said anything.
"So," he said, speaking the first thought that came to head, "are you going home for Christmas holidays?"
"I might, and I might not. It all just depends, I guess. Why? Are you thinking of keeping the plan in full action over the vacation?" she said, narrowing her eyes in feigned suspicion. "After all, Harry always stays here for the break, doesn't he? And doesn't Hermione usually stay as well?"
He nodded. "Then, it would be the perfect opportunity!" she said, her eyes glittering with malicious glee.
"All right, if that's what you want," he said.
"You don't like the idea?"
"I do, but I'm not sure how much longer we can keep up this masquerade without being caught."
"If Hermione hasn't caught on to what we're doing yet, then I'm not sure she ever will… don't worry," she said, seeing the look on his face. "Everything will be all right. You'll see. When have I ever let you down?"
He glanced at the bulge in the side of her pajamas, obviously where the bandages were, and swallowed hard saying quietly, "You never have,"
She saw the quick look he had taken at her side, reading his feelings, and, taking both his hands in hers in a bold move that surprised even herself as well as him, she said gently, "Ron, it wasn't your fault. No, just listen to me," she said as he opened his mouth to speak, removing one hand from his to place a long slender finger on his lips to hush him. "You would've done the same thing for me, wouldn't you?"
He looked down at their entwined hands, nodding silently.
"You're my-" she stopped short. What was he exactly, to her? It had been a while since she had thought about it; everything had been done "according to the plan," and not with much thought given to it.
"- friend." she finished awkwardly. "That's what friends do for each other, isn't it? Michael's already apologized, although I'm not saying he doesn't deserve more torture, and Harry's the one I'm supposed to making feel guilty right now, remember?" she said, looking into his downcast face and smiling inquisitively.
"Yeah," he said, grinning slightly.
"Well, Ms. Chang, I hope you're quite satisfied, because I had to fight your friend tooth and nail to drag her back to the dining hall, and it was only under threat of detention every night for the rest of the school year that she stayed." Madam Pomfrey said, walking in backwards with Cho's lunch tray in hand, pushing the door open.
"Quick, hide!" Cho hissed, letting go of Ron's hands and forcing his head down, evidently wanting him to hide underneath the bed. He forced his way underneath bed in the narrow space in between the floor and the metal frame, thanking his lucky stars that he wasn't overweight.
"Here you are," the nurse said briskly, placing the serving dish on the bedside table. "Eat up. And after you've finished, let me know and I'll change your bandages again,"
"Thank you," she said, smiling gratefully. The elder witch nodded in reply and proceeded to walk out the door again to tend to her other patients. She let out a breath of relief and said, "All right, you can come out now,"
After a few minutes of what seemed to be a difficult struggle, he finally emerged, looking disheveled and dust-covered. He coughed a bit, brushing himself off.
"I wonder how long it's been since the last time they dusted down there," he mused out loud, wrinkling his nose slightly to prevent a sneeze from escaping.
"Who knows?" she replied, motioning for him to bend down. He did so, and she swiped her hand gently over his hair, making the small flecks fly out into the air.
"Thanks," he said.
"No problem."
"Well… I guess I'd better go now," he said slowly, not quite wanting to leave, although he had to in order to be on time for his next class.
"Oh. All right," she said, glancing over at her lunch, still untouched. "Wait!" she added. "You're not eating anything?"
"No, but it'll be fine. I'll make up for it at dinner," he said, winking.
She smiled and held out her arms, and he responded, both enjoying one last hug. Reluctantly, he straightened up and said quietly, "See you later, Cho,"
"Bye," she said, waving. She watched until the door had closed all the way behind him and sighed sadly, picking up the tray of food from the table and beginning to eat. As she cut into the slice of roast beef with her knife, holding it with her fork, she thought again of the question she had asked herself a few weeks before.
"Do I really have feelings for him?"
With Harry, it had always been extremely emotional, to say the least, mostly because of her own carelessness and insensitivity, she supposed, but with Ron, everything was just more… relaxed. The entire world could have been taken over by the fiery depths of hell itself and she wouldn't have noticed while in the little dreamland she lived in when she was with him. He was funny, and serious at times, but always able to make her smile and to bring out the best in her as a person and friend.
She wondered what it would be like if the plan hadn't existed and they were an actual couple. They balanced each other, one being yin, and the other yang. His lightheartedness contradicted her solemn personality, and her level-minded thinking helped tone down his sometimes overly mischievous ways, and that was just as friends. No doubt as an actual pair they would be even closer, if that ever came to being… which was just the point. It didn't seem to be possible at all, and it seemed useless to try for something that would never happen. Besides, wasn't part of the goal of the plan to win back Hermione for him? Or was it? They hadn't discussed that at all, but she had assumed that, naturally, he was aiming for regaining his previous girlfriend. Judging from his attitude towards her, however, it seemed otherwise. He was bitter at the moment, that's all, she thought. Once this was all over and Hermione was his again, and everything has been forgiven, the plan would have been carried out successfully and they would part ways, perhaps never to see each other again, once she graduated from Hogwarts. And that would be the end of it all. She felt her heart wrench slightly at the thought, but assured herself that nothing ever ended perfectly, although she didn't want it to come to a finish. But, if he had gotten what he wanted, then she would be happy… she hoped, for his sake and hers. After all, she had assured herself over and over again that she had no feelings whatsoever for him, and another blow would surely finish off whatever had been left of her heart.
She put down the utensils and set aside the tray before calling for the nurse.
"Finished?" she said, to which Cho nodded. She picked it up and exited the room, returning with a bottle of a strange sort of paste Madame Pomfrey had been applying to her side and some fresh bandages.
"Turn on your side," she commanded.
As the cool cream was spread evenly on the exposed skin of her side, she closed her eyes.
"You will be happy for him when that day comes, if it ever does," she firmly thought to herself. And yet, deep inside of her, she knew that she was just lying to herself…
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A/N: It's a bit longer than a few of the previous chapters, so I hope you all appreciate it! Okay, sorry for the long wait, and I apologize a million times over. Also, due to my delay in updating, the Christmas season comes a bit late in this story (eek!!!!), so please excuse that as well. I hope everyone has had a good holiday! Happy New Year as well, in case I don't review before then! Along those lines, the year 2003 has been absolutely amazing. It really has. I discovered www.fanfiction.net in June and joined then, and, although I didn't have a smooth start, all of you, my reviewers, have kept me going and happy. Thank you so much. May you be as generous in 2004! Anyway, to move on to my replies:
To LogicalRaven: Ah, well, read Dear Harry over again and feel better knowing that she'll get together with Harry in that story, 'kay? Michael… hmm… I'm not sure I want everything with him to turn out… maybe something of Hagrid's can eat him… lol
To glitterfairyxoxo: Yes, I thought it was only fair that he wouldn't catch it either! Thanks and Happy Holidays!
To Sheen Rox: Thanks; I feel so happy now! :-) Jimmy Neutron is awesome, isn't he?
To shortywithbrains: Oh, wow, you live in California? It was a bit cooler than I thought it would be, you know, since it's California and all, but I really enjoyed my trip with the band anyway. Thank you for your understanding and allowing this to be the only fic where Ron isn't with Hermione! On that note, I have to say RON AND HERMIONE FOREVER!!!!! It's just not right any other way…
To LauriAnn: Well, I do care, although not in an offended way. Thanks for reviewing! (*winks and smiles*) Go ahead. Go overboard. It's fun. :-)
To sammy17: Aw, you're making me feel all warm and fluffy inside now… no, seriously, you are. I'm so happy it's insane! I love the thing you did with your reviews; that was so original! I'm sorry I couldn't get them together in time for your Christmas present, but I need them to slowly actually fall in love, you know? And I'm fine with your addiction as long as you don't do something desperate… :-)
To Wanchu: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! That's even more evil than me leaving everyone hanging! lol Thanks for being so confident in me, and I hope you had a good vacation!
To fairy-lights1: Yes, sadly, somehow in the twisted way that my plot goes, Harry and Hermione, our very own beloved Harry and Hermione have become evil… (sobs) Anyway, I'm so glad you love both my stories! You've made me very happy! I know I really like your story… ah, the evils of being so dependent on coffee… :-)
To ChoChang100: All right, good. I would have felt bad if you didn't like it… so, does your boyfriend have black hair, glasses, green eyes, the works? Even if he doesn't, I bet he's hot, isn't he? C'mon, admit it… :-)
Everybody's been so great, and I just have to say thanks one more time. Also, as a small poll, I'd like to ask this one question, to help me with this story I'm brainstorming on now. Which female character from the HP books do you think is the most insecure and most likely to be told what to do by her parents, etc. and doing exactly what she's told? If I could get some feedback on that, that would be great. Oh, and keep a lookout for a story coming out soon entitled The Golden Phoenix by me. It's a Draco/Hermione story, my first, and it's in reply to a challenge. More details coming later! And once again, Happy Holidays!
-Unicorn13