Disclaimer: Don't own. Never will. Nuff said. My character, kay?

AN: HOLD ME BAT BOYYYYY… Um… sorry, I just found the Bat Boy soundtrack on Rhapsody and am having waaaay too much fun. Anyways, I'm trying to get this chapter done and stay on top of this story. This is going to be humor, but yes I know what the plot is going to be and it will in fact come out soon. Alright?

Chapter Six

I don't dream very often.

It's one of those weird side affects of being psychic. I'm inside other people's minds so much that when I sleep, I don't even know what to do inside of my own head. Instead, I sort of get cast into other people's dreams. It's a very conscious affair, but its not like I can get hurt or anything. I can't really control which dream I go into first. It's usually just the person that's closest to where I'm sleeping. From there, though, as dreams end I can hop into other people's dreams. It's something that I generally keep under wraps. People have trouble enough when they know that I can read their thoughts, but most people feel utterly violated if someone knows their dreams.

So basically the best thing to do in these sorts of dreams is just not to make my presence known. And if they do find me, to act like I'm just a figment of their imagination. In the meantime, what I find out can be pretty interesting. You wouldn't believe the kind of blackmail that I get on people.

Like, at this very moment, Keiko is dreaming that she's in a closet watching Yusuke undressing.

Yeah.

My abilities cross over into my dreams, to a certain extent. I can just tell you that Keiko's thoughts are quite interesting at this moment. I'll spare you the details. Just Keiko's imagination of Yusuke is traumatizing enough.

I'm across the closet from her. I silence my breathing, as is possible only in dreams. Keiko can't see me in the dark. It's entertaining how close you get to people and they never know.

Keiko takes a quick breath in. No… she wouldn't… oh God…

Keiko sneezes.

Yusuke looks up quickly. In only his underwear he walks over to the closet. And in what seems like slow motion he opens up the closet door. I flatten myself to the opposite wall in the shadow of the closet. I should not be seen.

There is a very awkward silence as the dream underwear boy stares at the self-image of Keiko.

"Ke-Keiko?" Yusuke stutters. I bite my lip to keep from laughing. The world dims, and I realize that the dream must be coming to an end.

"I… um… enjoy your… closet?" Keiko squeals hopefully.

"You were watching me undress!" Yusuke laughs, leaning in and trapping Keiko with his body. I can feel her anxiety, but also a strange excitement. This guy has got to work out. I don't know many other freshmen that look like that.

"No I wasn't!" Keiko squeaks.

"So how's the view, huh?"

"Shut up, Yusuke!" Keiko says. Good. She thinks.

"You like it?" Yusuke grins. "Well how about something you'll really like?" He leans in so that his face is barely inches away from her face.

"Yusuke?" Keiko gasps. She can get no word in edgewise as he kisses her. All this is very interesting while one is about a foot away trying not to be noticed. The dream continues for about two seconds more before the world fades to black. I feel the familiar tug that means I will be moving into another dream instead of waking up.

Keiko awakes with a smile on her face. She rolls over slowly, slightly confused by the absence of the teenage boy that had been kissing her only a moment ago.

"God damn." Keiko mutters, coming to the unhappy conclusion the it was just a dream.

I find myself somewhere very cold. Well, as cold as things can be in a dream.

All around me is the pristine white of snow and a pale gray sky. The landscape is riddled with snowmen.

Very, very demonic looking snowmen.

With knives.

While I look a figure is running through the snow. As the figure passes the snowmen, the snowmen raise their heads and follow after him. They go just fast enough to always pose a threat to the person running, but never quite fast enough to catch him. It's the typical nightmare.

The figure dashes in front of me. The hoard of satanic snowmen slide after him. I finally catch site of the figures face. I change my appearance slightly and then call out to him.

"Hiei?"

"Hn?" He looks up, no recognition on his face.

"This… may help." Few people realize that if you know you are dreaming, it is easy to manipulate your dreams. Since I almost always know that I'm dreaming, it makes for some fun dreams. I hand Hiei a newly conjured flamethrower.

Hiei looks down at the object that I just handed him, then up at the crowd around him. Snowmen, flamethrower. Snowmen, flamethrower. The snowmen start to slide away, looking a little worried. Hiei is grinning evilly.

All I'll say about the end of this dream is that I didn't know snowmen could scream up until that point.

It feels like a string around my waist has been tugged, and my white surroundings change to…

Pink.

The whole world is pink, with various bows everywhere. Looking down, I see that the whole floor is covered with a fuzzy white mass. Which, when I look more closely, turns out to be kitties. Swarms and swarms of them. Everywhere.

So… damn… cute.

Whose dream could this be? Keiko's? Boton's?

I stop dead in my tracks as I see what is in front of me.

Kuwabara is hunched over, playing with a particularly cute kitten.

"Kitty kitty kitty!" Gurgles Kuwabara. Oh God. What blackmail this would make. I wonder how much Yusuke would pay to know this?

A lot.

"Kuwabara-kun!" Shouts a voice from my right. Uh-oh. I have to blend in somehow or I'm going to be noticed.

I shudder at what I am going to have to do. Its like every bad anime and manga cliché come back to bite me in the ass.

I turn into a… cat girl.

I drop to all fours on the ground and turn my kitty head to the newcomer. She is a very pretty youngish looking girl She has blue hair and a crimson eyes. Strangely enough, she defiantly reminds me of someone that I know, though I can't put my finger on it exactly. Kuwabara's mental reaction to her is so strong that she has to be a real person. He obviously has romantic feelings for her.

"Yukina!" He shouts and runs to her. It's your average romance scene, with two lovers running through a field of flowers. Except with kitties. Flying every which way. I am pelted with several kitties who are mewing with confusion. I ignore the bundles of fur that have latched themselves onto my clothing.

So it turns out Kuwabara has just one bigger loves than kitties, and it seems to be this Yukina girl. Funny. Looking at him, he doesn't seem like the romantic type. Or the kitty type. You learn something new every day, I guess.

Suddenly, the kitty mass around me begins to move. Out of the swarm, a huge bulk begins to form. The kitties are going into attack formation! Oh sweet God, it's the end of us all.

"Kuwabara!" The huge kitty monster booms-mews- whatever. "You have betrayed us! You love this demon more than us!"

Now that I think of it, kitties really are pretty menacing.

"How could I ever love anything more than you, my kitties!" Kuwabara shouts.

"Then give her to ussssssss!" The kitties hiss.

"Why do you want her?"

"Blood keeps our fur looking shiny and healthy." The kitties purr. Al-righty then. Yukina blinks a few times.

I spot something strange coming out from behind the kitties. Something that looks like a black coat and a spot of very pale skin.

"Um… Kuwabara?" I say, tapping his calf from the ground.

"Yes, kitty? Why have you not joined the evil mass?" He coos. Scary. Scary scary scary scary.

"It's not really the kitties. Someone is controlling them."

"No! My innocent kitties are being used!"

"Yeah. Someone in back is doing it."

Kuwabara quickly dashes behind the giant kitty puppet and holds up the collar of the person controlling them. The kitty monster quickly collapses.

"Elder Tuguro?" He gasps. The disgusting looking creature that he is holding up shrivels a little bit.

"You have foiled my plans! Curses! You win!" Elder Tuguro shrinks and disappears.

"Oh Kuwabara! I love you!" Yukina cries. They rush into an embrace, and the dream fades.

That is possibly the most mind fked dream that I have ever seen in my whole life, if you excuse my French. I open my eyes slowly to blinding bright light. After blinking twice, my sight adjusts to the daylight.

Keiko is still asleep, with her leg flung over a pillow that she is pressing close to her chest. I can hear her mutter Yusuke under her breath, and she pulls the pillow closer.

Suddenly, I feel something very odd. Another presence, pretty close to where we are. I lift my head, very slightly and look toward the window. Yusuke is sitting Indian style on the branch, watching Keiko with a very slight smile on his face and almost shockingly tender things going through his head.

I close my eyes as I realize that if things stay like they are now, I can never have this. I sigh and roll over softly, but can not go back to sleep.

AN: This chapter actually ended up being pretty amusing, with surprising angst at the end. Reviews are much appreciated, just so I know people are reading.