THE BITTER SWEET

What happened to us? We used to be so perfect
Now we're lost and lonely
What happened to us? Deep inside I wonder
Did I lose my only?

What Happened To Us?
Hoobastank

"It's all so different now," Marissa said as she and Ryan sat watching the crowd.

"Yeah…" Ryan replied softly.

His mind was not really on the party but rather the possible things that could have been happening back at the Cohen's house between Seth and Rachel. Ryan's heart ached with the thought that the pair would never be able to work out their problems, even becoming friends again if nothing else.

Wonder if they've spoken yet, he thought.

Ryan kept having second thoughts, kept thinking that maybe he should jump in the car right now and drive back home, making sure that his sister and best friend didn't have to be put through the pain that they would be. Then the reasoning side of him thought better, knowing that what he was doing was right.

"So how are you holding up?" Ryan asked trying to get his mind off what was happening elsewhere.

Marissa almost laughed at the question, she couldn't help it. Things were beginning to become worse at home for her, and seeing her mum together with Caleb again only made those feelings worse.

"Right now, I'm not too sure," she finally replied.

"Things will get better," Ryan stated.

Marissa only shrugged at the comment. "Maybe. Right now I don't really care."

"Why's that?"

Marissa turned to face Ryan kissing him lightly on the lips as she did. "Because I'm with you."

Rachel felt her heart begin to beat wildly in her chest as she stood, stone cold in the hallway, her back still facing Seth. She could almost see the look of longing on his face.

Slowly turning her eyes met his briefly before she looked to the ground. He held the door open as he leaned against the frame staring at her intently.

It took Rachel a moment to realise what she was doing. Moving toward him, despite not wanting too. Stepping into his room she crossed her arms insecurely, her eyes travelling over to the bed, before focusing on the floor.

"Why won't you look at me?" Seth asked as he walked up to her.

"Because I don't want you to see me," Rachel answered.

Seth moved his hand to her chin and lifted her eyes to his. "I want to see you."

Rachel looked at him, into the eyes she used to get lost in and saw into his soul. One of love and forgiveness. It almost killed her inside.

She moved a shaking hand to Seth's exposed chest, moving it to where a white, square bandage covered his wound. Seth stepped closer into the gesture.

"It's all my fault," she whispered trailing a finger over the edge of the material.

"No," Seth insisted shaking his head. "You couldn't have known."

"I never…" Rachel began pulling her hand away. "When I went back to him…I never…I mean, he tried to make me but…"

Seth smiled at her. "It doesn't matter."

Rachel looked away from him. "How are you and Anna doing?" She asked not really wanting to know the answer.

Seth looked at her closely. "Rach, Anna and me aren't together."

Rachel could almost see the look on her face, a completely blank expression. "What?"

"How could I go out with someone else when I'm still in love with you?" Seth answered.

Rachel looked at him in shock, she had not expected the answer she received. Her heart began to hammer in her chest as Seth took another step toward her.

"No…" she whispered backing up a step before moving away from him and out the door.

"Rach…" Seth began going after her. When he placed a hand on her arm Rachel whirled around her eyes wide.

"You…no, you can't," she uttered.

"Why not?" Seth asked placing his hands on her shoulders. "Why can't I?"

"B-because I don't deserve you," Rachel whispered.

Seth stared at her strongly taking her hands in his. Rachel tried to pull away but only succeeded in moving Seth closer, her hands up against her chest, Seth's still entwined in hers. He made sure she was looking into his eyes when he spoke.

"You deserve the world."

"No," Rachel said turning away.

"Yes, Rach," Seth insisted pulling her back to him.

Rachel looked deep into Seth's eyes. "Why are you doing this?" She whispered.

Seth looked down at her believing the words that he spoke more than anything. "Because I love you."

"Pretty swanky do," Jimmy commented looking about the grand hall in which he stood taking a swig from his bear bottle. "A few too many suits for my liking though."

Sandy nodded his head seeing all of the businessmen, some of the most powerful in all of New Port as they sipped their wine and exchanged their stories of money making and greed.

"Can't say I haven't seen it before though," Sandy answered.

"What did you two expect, teenagers with surfboards and B average grades?" Kirsten asked realistically.

Jimmy smiled. "It would have been nice."

Sandy let out a sigh causing Kirsten to look his way. "What is it?"

He glanced at her. "I'm just worried about Seth and Rachel, maybe I should call just to make sure they're okay."

"Nice little plan you have going there," Jimmy stated.

"Excuse me?"

Jimmy looked from Sandy to Kirsten and then back again as if they were the slowest people on earth. "Putting them together for the night…alone."

When he received blank looks from both of his companions.

"Are you serious? You didn't realise that's what you did?"

Sandy narrowed his eyes slightly. "Ryan," he sighed.

Kirsten looked over at him. "He planned the whole thing. That's why he came tonight, it wasn't because of Marissa. He wanted to get those two alone together so they were forced to talk."

They all fell silent, thinking about what this new revelation could mean. Sandy completely understood why Ryan had done what he had. He wanted his sister and friend to be happy, and he knew as well as anyone that they wouldn't be until they made up for the time lost between them.

"I think it's damn smart of the boy," Jimmy finally spoke.

Kirsten looked up at him before letting out a small laugh. She knew herself that it would probably be the best thing for the pair. Lock them in a house together and let them duke it out. But she was suddenly filled with dread. What happened if this brilliant plan came with a painful flaw?

Rachel looked up at Seth feeling the sudden need to collapse to the floor away from the world. She didn't understand how he could be forgiving her, how he could be professing his undying love for her.

Tears welled behind her eyes and rolled fast down her cheeks as she realised that this was someone who would do anything for her. Would die for her and yet still love her like there was no tomorrow.

Seth saw the tears running fast down her face as she stood and faced him. He knew that though they were in sorrow, part of them were in relief that he would not leave her.

He moved closer to Rachel guiding her into his room and closing the door. He moved his hands to the side of her face and brushed her hair away.

"Seth…" Rachel began.

Seth could see the deep pain in her eyes, the same pain which had been there when she had been there beside him as he lay helpless on the cold gravel, bullet wound in his shoulder.

He could feel his own tears forming behind his eyes.

"…I'm so sorry," she ended.

Seth was shaking his head at Rachel comment. "No, don't be sorry. Never be sorry."

Tears were beginning to slide down his own cheeks now as he placed his forehead on Rachel's, feeling her shaking against him.

"Never be sorry."

Rachel was suddenly in his arms, the two so close for the first time in so long. Seth pulled her body close to his feeling his shirt growing damp with her tears.

"Don't cry, Rach, please don't cry," he whispered as she continued to let out her emotions.

Rachel pulled her head back hesitantly and looked into his eyes, their faces so close that Seth could feel her warm breath. His lips brushed lightly against hers not knowing how she would react when he did something he had wanted to for so long. He kissed her, instantly feeling her return the gesture, which made a relief flow through his body. As she moved closer Seth deepened the symbol of his love to her. The feeling was on of desperate passion fuelled by the need for each other.

He felt Rachel take a tight hold on his shirt, her tears still falling even as their lips met.

Seth kissed her again, this time not being able to express enough how he just wanted her to be happy. How he wanted to make her happy.

"Rach…" Seth whispered as he pulled away only enough to speak.

Rachel sniffed slightly trying to control the tears, which continued to fall from her eyes. "Yeah."

"I love you."

Rachel looked deep into Seth's eyes for a moment, searching them as though they would unlock all of the mysteries that came with them. She didn't need to answer him with words, Seth knew what her response was when she pulled him back down toward her and kissed him passionately.

Marsal had pinned her between himself and the cold wall of the bathroom; his dark eyes searching hers with no concern whatsoever.

Rachel could feel herself shaking, knowing that even if she struggled it would be a losing battle. There was nothing that she could do. If she screamed he would kill her, but if she didn't…

She could feel the knife that he held pressed deeply against her throat, cutting into her flesh and drawing blood.

Her entire body felt cold.

"Trust me Babe," Kurt whispered causing Rachel's eyes to fly open as she realised that she was no longer with Marsal.

She stood with her past love looking out over the side of a cliff where she stood, her feet teetering on the edge. She could feel the sharp rocks beneath her as they pierced the flesh of her skin.

"Choose," he began. "You or him."

Rachel's eyes whirled and she saw Seth standing only meters away from them his face downcast, hair sprawled around his head.

"Seth," she murmured, terrified about what was to come.

"Sorry Babe, wrong answer."

A gunshot rang out and Seth's body slumped to the ground.

"No!" Rachel screamed as she shot bolt upright, clutching the blanket over her bare chest as her eyes flew open.

Seth was quick to awaken too, sitting up from his position beside her on the bed and placing a hand on her shoulder. "Rach, what is it?"

Rachel's body trembled violently as the aftershock of what she had seen fell upon her. There was nothing that she could have done as she was faced with the two men who had left a stain in her mind.

"God, you're shaking," Seth said pulling the blanket from himself and rapping it tightly around her body.

He took her into his arms feeling her shaking lightly against him as he did and wanting more than ever to comfort her.

"Shh," Seth whispered. "It's okay, it was just a dream."

"No, it wasn't," Rachel said pulling away only slightly to look into his eyes. "It really…and you were…"

Seth smiled down at her kissing her gently on the forehead as he did. "Rach, I'm right here."

He stared at her in the dark for a moment thinking about what a beauty she was sitting there beside him with only a blanket to cover her, he, himself in the same position. Bringing a hand up to her face, Seth gently tucked a piece of fallen hair behind her ear and brought his lips to hers. Rachel melted into the gesture feeling completely safe in his arms.

"It's okay," Seth murmured resting her head against his chest.

Rachel shook her head slightly. "No it's not."

Seth pulled away from her and looked strongly into her eyes. "What are you talking about."

Rachel tried to find the words, tried to explain to him that she felt so horrible for what she had put his family through. Even looking at Seth now, seeing him sitting there beside her in his bed, wanting her more than ever, Rachel still felt the pain of knowing what she had done.

"I hurt you," she managed.

Seth frowned at the comment. "No…"

"Yes" she insisted. "I hurt you and Kirsten and Sandy and…" the words caught in her throat slightly. "And Ry'."

Seth sighed. "Don't think that way."

"How else am I supposed to think? I can't even believe you're here now."

Seth smiled down at her, seeing the pure honesty in her eyes. "You know you'll always have me."

"I don't want to lose you again," Rachel whispered, her voice party muffled by Seth's chest as she buried her face against him.

"I'm not going anywhere," he insisted.

Rachel let out a long breath as she felt her heart finally start to beat at its normal rate again. The impact of what she had seen weighed heavily upon her even as Seth began to speak.

"I want to give you something," Seth said sliding out from under the covers and moving to the opposite side of the room.

Rachel propped herself up on her elbow and watched him with a hint of interest as he moved about the room, sheet clutched around his waist.

Finally finding what he wanted Seth moved back to the bed and lay beside her switching on the bedside lamp as he did.

"Here," he said handing over the golden square box he held. "I was waiting to give you this. Happy birthday."

Rachel looked at it with narrowed eyes. "Does it have a receipt?" She asked not wanting Seth to have spent any money on her.

Seth only smiled at the comment.

Rachel looked down at him sitting up and re-positioning the blanket around her. Slowly she opened the box to reveal the sparkling necklace within. Her eyes went wide at the sight. From a thin, silver chain hung five pointed crystals, each as flawless as the one it proceeded.

"Oh my God," Rachel gasped the light dancing along her features. "Seth, I can't take this, it's too much."

"The woman made it very clear that there are no refunds and I can already tell you now don't even think of giving it to me because I checked and I have nothing that goes with it." Seth smiled at her after finishing.

Rachel couldn't speak, she was in complete shock, it was only when she felt Seth shift beside her and his hands come up to take the box that her eyes snapped back into focus. He unfastened the clip on the chain and moving with care, Seth rapped the chain around her neck and closed it securely at the back, letting his hand linger at the front for a moment before falling back to his side.

"It's beautiful," Rachel said touching the crystals, which lay, against her neck.

"Something beautiful for someone beautiful," Seth answered.

Rachel raised an eyebrow. "You're so korny sometimes."

Seth grinned wider. "It works, doesn't it."

Rachel looked down at him before moving closer. "Guess tonight's your lucky night," she whispered before kissing Seth deeply.

Caleb stood before the crowd and an instant need to punch the man washed over Ryan. He despised him, not just because he had hurt his sister, but because he didn't show any remorse. Even now as he stood proudly before thousands, gloating about his business. Even as his eyes locked with Ryan's for an instant, there was nothing. No sorry, no feelings of making a mistake.

"I would like to say a final word before officially commencing the party," Caleb spoke into the microphone. "First, where is my darling Ju-Ju?"

Ryan felt Marissa noticeably stiffen beside him as her mother took to the stage with Caleb smiling widely and waving at the people before her.

"I have to say that I couldn't have done any of this without my beautiful companion. Thank you," Caleb ended kissing Julie lightly as she blushed a crimson red.

"Oh Cal, you could do anything," Julie commented.

Ryan almost laughed, he had to force himself not too. Caleb Nickel could do anything, but in the process he would hurt anyone and everything in his way, no matter who they were.

Caleb stood silently for a moment simply looking at the people who had gathered before the small stage that he stood on.

"There are some people here tonight who are not my biggest fans," he began. His eyes trailed through the people and rested on Ryan's. "But I'm here to tell them that I don't care about what they think of me because they are not the ones with everything that I have."

The crowd was now eerily silent, some people even turning to Ryan, curious as to whom Caleb was talking directly to. But he had now taken his gaze over to where Kirsten, Sandy and Jimmy sat.

"I am not sorry for the things that I have done, because they have all led me to be where I am today. To be able to stand in front of you fine people and speak as the richest man in New Port."

Ryan could feel the blood within him begin to boil at the words which were spilling from Caleb's mouth. How dare he talk as though nothing had happened. He had ruined Rachel's life, had put the Cohen's through complete hell and still he didn't feel anything.

"These things happen," Caleb went on. "People go up against each other."

He looked hard at Ryan and smiled wickedly.

"And only one can come out on top."

Ryan's mind instantly ticked to his sister and Seth back at the Cohen's house. He prayed that they were okay.

Rachel lay cuddled against Seth's body, her every inch exhausted. She rested her head against his bare chest, running lazy fingers along his exposed flesh.

Seth smiled down at her, kissing the top of her head gently and savouring the feeling of her unclothed body pressed against his, a blanket the only thing covering them. He suddenly knew what true happiness was, to have the love of his life lying in his arms.

Rachel let out a small tired sigh before shifting against Seth's body.

"Are you okay?" He asked looking down at her.

Rachel thought about the question for a moment before answering.

"I'm fine."

And for the first time in too long she actually meant it. She was no longer afraid. Not worried of what might become of her. For at that moment the only thing that she could think of the was young man lying beside her, loving her with his all.

Rachel moved her head up and kissed Seth lightly before lying back down against him and falling asleep in her lover's arms.

THE END………for now

(Wow, its over. Thanks so much for you support of this story. You guys rock. Yes there will be a sequel and I would love any of your suggestions as to what should happen in it. You know I only realised in finishing this chapter that I've been starting and ending these stories in the same way. The first one started with Rachel and Ryan and him thinking about how he could save her. It ended with both of them and her talking about how he had saved her. This story started with Rachel and Seth and Seth being there for her, and it ended with both of them and on the same topic. Kinda scary. I didn't even know I was doing it. LOL. Anyways, can't wait to start the next story. Please review and give lots of suggestions. Peace out)