Disclaimer: I still don't own the Patriot pout
"What made you think you are dead?" Tavington was in full time shrink mode.
"I don't think I'm dead, I know it!"
"Ok, what made you know you were dead" Tavington asked, completely calmly.
"I just woke up dead" To his everlasting credit, Tavington kept a perfectly straight face. Inwardly he was torn between a sigh of exasperation and an uncharacteristic burst of laughter.
"What made you know that you are dead?"
"I just was."
"Yes, I know, what made you know?"
"I just did."
Three Weeks later...
"It's hopeless! He will never be 'alive' again!" Tavington was venting to Capt. Bordon. As always, Tavington was being more than a little snarky, "I just wish that I knew what caused it!"
"You hate this don't you?"
"Thank you captain obvious!" The col. Snapped sarcastically, then, more excitedly, Melancholia!"
"What?!"
"Depression coupled with delusions," Tavington explained excitedly.
"Great, a diagnosis; now what?" Bordon asked.
"Um, good question."
"Great," Bordon moaned.
"We have a diagnosis, but we don't know what to do with it," Tavington explained to O'Hara.
"What is wrong with him and how can you not know what to do, oh great shrink?"
"At least could come up with the diagnosis," Tavington shot back.
"Well what can you do?"
"Um, first we need to know what caused it."
"Back to the drawing board then?"
"Yep."
"So what made you know you are dead?"
"I already told you! I just woke up dead!"
Tavington was back to speaking with the lord general, much to everyone's dismay; nine tenths of them believed Tavington would solve the problem by killing the Lord General for real.
A/N: I finally updated! The reason for the delay, for those who don't know, was several weeks learning to play bells, then three weeks finding out I'm not playing bells and learning a lot of other instruments instead (I'm a pianist and clarinetist normally)!