Disclaimer: I don't own anything in this story except for Hobbity Wings

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Chapter Two- Of Pantry Doors and Food Fights

Pippin sneaked down the staircase very, very quietly. If those strange, fairy-like elves woke up, he'd be doomed to wash the dishes of Lothlorien until the seventh age of Middle Earth. Then he stepped off the last stair circling around the tree.

Ha! Pippin thought. I did it! I'm on the ground, and nobody noticed! Er, uh, where are the kitchens?

Pippin looked around. Think! he commanded himself. There is the room where we all were standing and Frodo looked at the scrapbook with pictures of Goldberry, so Galadriel ran off...that way!

Pippin turned to his right and started to run down the passage of trees in Caras Galadon, stopping suddenly.

"Will you look into the mirror?" asked Galadriel's voice. Pippin almost answered, "Yes, I would like to see my reflection right now, and I'm sure everyone else would, too," but then he heard Frodo's voice answer, "What will I see?"

"Even the wisest cannot tell, for the mirror shows many things. Things that are, things that were, and some things that have not yet come to pass." Galadriel answered. Knowing if he stayed any longer he might be caught, Pippin quickly scurried down the corridor and to the room labeled: Pantry.

He saw that the door was only a few planks of wood nailed together. He tried to open the door, but it must have been boarded shut for the night. But there was just enough room for him to sneak under the door. That would have to do, he wanted some lembas bread.

"Will you look into the mirror?" Galadriel asked.

Why do I get the feeling I'm not going to see my reflection when I look in it? Frodo thought. "What will I see?" he replied.

Galadriel started to pour some water into the basin. "Even the wisest cannot tell, for the mirror shows many things. Things that are, things that were, and some things that have not yet come to pass."

"Will I see Goldberry?" Frodo asked hopefully.

Galadriel smirked. "Look and see."

Frodo crossed his arms. "First tell me if I'll see any scary images. I'm only allowed to watch PG movies."

"Frodo, you're fifty, so you should be able to watch PG-33 movies now!" Galadriel said. "Just look in the mirror."

Frodo looked in and saw Legolas combing his hair, and orcs in the background sneaking up on him and stealing his bow and quivver full of arrows while he wasn't paying attention to anything. Then Legolas noticed, and whipped around, his hair...flying off? Underneath he had curly brown hair.

"Hey! Legolas wears a wig!" Frodo shouted triumphantly.

"Keep looking," Galadriel told him, so Frodo did so.

In the mirror Sam was gardening, and Lobelia Sackville Baggins was yelling at him. Then an orc came out of nowhere and threw a dungbomb at her! Lobelia ran away, screaming. Then suddenly the image switched to a big flaming red eye, which started to say loudly, "Ash Nazg Durbatuluk, Ash Nazg Gimbatul, Ash Nazg Thrakatuluk Agh Burzum Ishi- man, this whole one ring to rule them all is tiring to say in the black speech!" Then the eye saw Frodo. "Oh, so you're not Denethor, Sauruman, or one of those other morons with a Palantir?" Then Sauron saw the ring. "Oooooh, my precioussss! We wants it!"

"That's Gollum's line!" Galadriel yelled at the mirror.

"Yes, I know!" Sauron said sadly. "It's just, the whole black speech thing is so tiring, because first I have to translate common tongue to Quenya, then Quenya to Sindarin, then Sindarin to the language of kings, then to the black speech!"

"Shut up, Sauron!" Galadriel screamed, smacking the water. It splashed all over the place. "Vile thing..." she muttered. "...he was never a good Dark Lord, not even a good Balrog. Kept pretending to be some stupid Necromancer..."

Then Galadriel saw something. It was Pippin, sitting on the top shelf of her pantry, eating all the lembas bread he could find.

"Nooooooooo!" Galadriel bellowed, gathering up her skirts and running down the hallway at full speed, Frodo right behind her. Galadriel came to a sudden halt. "PIPPIN! DID YOU SNEAK UNDER THE PANTRY DOOR? HOW DARE YOU! IS THAT A DUNGBOMB IN YOUR HAND? BECAUSE, IF IT IS, THEN YOU MUST HAVE STOLEN IT FROM FRED AND GEORGE WEASLEY! I BET THEY'RE SOOOOO ANGRY! IN FACT, I BET GANDALF IS VERY ANGRY! AND- IS THAT MY SPECIAL HALLOWEEN CANDY YOU'RE EATING? I'M TELLING CELEBORN!!!!!" Galadriel shrieked, running off and tripping over the way-too-long hem of her skirt.

At dinner the next night Legolas said, "Mrs. Galadriel? May I have some lembas bread?"

"Why of course, young Mr. Greenleaf!" Galadriel said politely. "There is enough for everyone to share, thanks to Celeborn doing some last-minute baking..." She glared at Pippin, who turned very red and hid under the sparkly green table.

Legolas helped himself to two pieces of lembas bread. Then suddenly he exclaimed, "Isn't that cool? Lembas sounds kind of like Legolas! Le is at the beginning of both names, and as is it the end of both names! Hahahahaha...eh, hehe..." he said, laughing quieter when he saw everyone staring at him as if he had some kind of mutant small pox making his hair show through his wig.

Sam was quietly cutting his potatoes and thinking about gardening when suddenly his fork slipped and a huge glob of potato skin flew through the air landed in the middle of Boromir's tunic. Boromir looked down at the white goo smeared on his lovely new and expensive shirt, and then back at Frodo, who was sitting right next to Sam with his fork raised. Guilty until proven innocent, as my father Denethor always says, Boromir thought, and picked up a roll and throwing it Frodo's forehead. Frodo looked shocked for a moment, then picked up a tomato and threw it as hard as he could at Boromir. Unfortunately, Frodo missed, and the tomato hit Haldir in the face. He blinked for a moment, then threw some pasta at Frodo. Unable to keep out of the fun, Pippin grabbed his mug of ale and attempted to splash it on Frodo, but at that moment Legolas leaned forward, and the ale splashed on his face. Legolas stood up, looking very angry, and started to throw bits of lembas bread at everyone sitting around the table. Then Merry and Pippin jumped up on the table, running around on top of it and taking everyone's ale and turning it upside-down over their heads. Pretty soon everyone except for Gandalf was throwing food and liquid at everyone possible, and then everyone was soaked and splattered with unknown substances, and it took several fireworks from Gandalf before everyone stopped the incredible food fight.

Celeborn was laughing uncontrollably, but Galadriel was beside herself with fury. "BOROMIR!" she screamed. "Go to your room, right NOW!!!"

"Gee, I just wanted to get back at Frodo for throwing a potato at me!" Boromir defended.

"It was an accident, and it wasn't even me! It was Sam! But his fork slipped, I'm know for a fact!" Frodo said quickly.

"Tomorrow, I am sorry to announce, you must continue your quest." Galadriel said, solemnly returning to eating her strawberry pie with a lembas bread crust. Celeborn started to grin insanely, and Galadriel looked up and shouted, "CELEBORN! YOU ARE NOT GOING TO THROW THIS PIE IN MY FACE!"

Celeborn crossed his arms and pouted, "I was only kidding!"

"Well, don't joke telepathically, then!" Galadriel retorted. She looked up and said, "Tomorrow meet me by the dock. I will give you your canoes and gifts."

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