SUMMER DAYS

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters used in this story. Most of these characters are owned by Nintendo. I do not own the rights to these characters, nor do I own , nor do I own Sega, nor do I own HAL Labs. I do, however, own this story. Please don't copy this story, because that would be taking away my income. You see, I make money from posting stories like this. On the internet. On a web site which freely displays stories. Without any need to pay money. Really. I do.

Chapter 1

The room, like the rest of the building, had been torn apart. Chairs and tables lay on their sides around the ground. The outer wall had small holes in it, letting a breeze flow in.
Samus Aran, wearing the suit entrusted to her by the Chozo, stepped quickly and silently through the mess, wary of whatever unseen force had done so much damage to the "Smash Mansion". She had no idea why she was still here and not out making money doing her day job of being a bounty hunter. But Master Hand had insisted upon everyone staying long after the casual tournament had finished. "Socializing," he had called it, or some other euphemistic rubbish.
Who did this to the mansion?
She walked through the door into a room which seemed to be the sort of room people hold conferences in. Even as she walked through the door she felt an instinctive disturbance. It was a trap!
Samus spun around, but saw nothing. No. That couldn't be. There was something here, and whatever it was…
Wind whistled behind her.
She turned.
A deafening noise…
…a powerful grip…
…shades of red…
… And then blackness.

Jigglypuff, Popo, Nana and Ness were having a fierce argument. Actually, Nana and Ness were having an argument. Jigglypuff was trying to prove to Popo that she really was a super star dancer, and Popo was lying on the ground in a daze after being accidentally hit on the head one too many times.
"Nana, do I look like a cheat to you?" said Ness stubbornly.
"Yes! You! Do!" shouted Nana.
"Jiggly jiggly puff!" said Jigglypuff, cartwheeling across the table Ness and Nana were sitting at.
"Nana, I only use my psychic powers for the good of mankind!"
"YOU SAW MY CARDS!"
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
Jigglypuff tripped and landed on Ness's head. Specifically, on his face. The argument ended.
"Nana…" said Popo.
"Yes?" growled Nana, suddenly bearing a remarkable resemblance to an angry polar bear.
"Give it a rest. It's only a card game."
"IT IS NOT ONLY A GAME!"
Slightly muffled by a pink Pokemon stuck to his face, Ness said, "Then what is it, Nana?"
Nana stopped to think about that. Hmm... blackjack was… a science? No, not really. And it probably wasn't an art. But it most definitely was not a game. It was… it was…
Silence.
Jigglypuff let go of Ness' face, landing hard on the floor. Jigglypuff, unable to remember what just happened, started dancing again.
Silence.
Unable to think of an answer, Nana whipped out a mallet and hit Ness on the head.
Jigglypuff, who thought herself very wise, attempted to tell Nana that violence wouldn't solve anything. But Jigglypuff had a terrible vocabulary, so she attempted an abstract interpretation:
Hop! Step! Cartwheel! Backflip! "Jiggly!" Step! Splits! Hop! Bob! Sing! "Puff jig!" Duck! Trip!
Fortunately, Kirby, with his mouth full, opened the door and walked into the room. Everyone stopped.
Silence. (Yes, there was a lot of silence that day.)
"Um…" said Popo. "I know! Captain Penguin!"
"Idiot," snapped Nana. "It's Captain Feather, silly."
Kirby shook his head.
Nana thought. "Um… Link?"
Kirby shook his head.
Jigglypuff thought (no, not really). "Jigglypuff!" she said.
Kirby shook his head, with an exasperated expression on his face.
Ness finally recovered from the mallet. He looked at Kirby, and smiled to himself.
"Hmm… average size…" he thought. Kirby suddenly turned black for a moment. "Got an electric attack… Fox? No, too fast to be Fox." Out loud, Ness said "Is it Samus, Kirby?"
Kirby nodded. He ran to an open window, aimed, and exhaled.

When she had been trapped inside the infinite vacuum, Samus had swivelled around to face where she had come in from. She immediately began firing plasma beams and missiles. But nothing happened. She reached out and felt an edge. She attempted dropping a bomb, which seemed to shake the mysterious contraption somewhat. But after half an hour or so, she realised that resistance was indeed futile. This was it. She was trapped.
Samus Aran suddenly went flying out of a window in the Smash Mansion. Seeing the ground coming up underneath her, she spread her arms and legs apart and landed on all fours, cushioning her impact.
What had happened?
She looked back at the window she had just fallen out of.

"Eek!" said Kirby, ducking out of sight. "Popo, I think she saw me!"
Nana looked extremely angry now. "There! You cheated again, Ness. I know you used your psychic powers to work out who it was."
"Nana, I'm not that bad! I worked it out myself! Only Samus could have been hitting Kirby like that."
"You are a CHEAT!"
Ness, tired of the argument, exerted a small psychic burst, knocking her unconscious. He and Popo both breathed a sigh of relief.
Jigglypuff thought (it took all her energy to do that), "This is funny!" She danced out of the room. Via the window. And fell. Out of the window.
Popo said, "Nana's a brilliant climber, but she's an absolute-"
"Yeah."
"Hey, you are using your psychic powers!"
"No, I… guessed what you were going to say."
Kirby stuck his head out of the window and saw that Jigglypuff had landed on something hard, namely Samus. "Hi!" he yelled, then, realising that he had given himself away, ran for it.

"Isn't Mario really cute?" asked Peach.
"Oh, yes. Kind of sexy, too."
"What?" said Peach.
"Um… nothing," said Captain Falcon.
Peach, Captain Falcon and Link were lying out on the grass outside the Smash Mansion.
"It's hot," said Link.
"So are you," said Captain Falcon.
"Anyone up for a game of tennis?" said Peach in a voice which was so cheery that if you heard it you probably would have gone completely insane and started to eat her hair in an attempt to make her stop.
Captain Falcon, upon hearing Peach's voice, went so completely insane that he started to pull and bite at Peach's hair to make her shut up.
"In this weather?" said Link. "It's way too hot."
"Like you," said Captain Falcon.
"What?" said Peach.
"Just forget I said that. Link is not hot. Link is… ugly, yeah. Link's really ugly."
Link decided that this was an insult, and tried to pull out his sword, ram the blade of it against Captain Falcon's throat, and growl. But by the time he had slipped the sword out, exhaustion had overcome him, and he collapsed face forward.
Peach giggled.
Kirby landed on Peach's face.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!" screamed Peach.
"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!" said Kirby.
Samus ran up, aimed her grappling beam, and swept Kirby into midair. "What the" – a bird conveniently chirped, censoring the next word - "were you doing trying to eat me?"
"Hey, baby," said Captain Falcon. "It must be hot in that suit. Why don't you take it off?"
Samus repositioned her left leg onto Captain Falcon's groin.
"Oof," said Captain Falcon.
Peach, rolling over on the grass, said "Samus, he's got a point. You must be boiling in that choco suit."
"There's a cooling system inside it. It keeps the temperature nice and comfortable."
Link, in a sudden burst of strength, stood up. "Give me the suit. I need… the suit… air conditioning… Ganon… Zelda… cool… too hot… Captain Falcon… gay…" He pulled out a bomb. "Get suit… off…" He threw the bomb at Samus' neck.
Samus pivoted on her left foot (which was still on Captain Falcon's groin), and threw herself backwards. The bomb missed her by millimetres…
Kirby, still stuck to Samus' grappling beam, saw a big blue-black object flying through the air. "Ice cream?" he thought, and inhaled it. He swallowed, and turned into… BOMB KIRBY! With the super ability to create… oh, come on, that's obvious.
Link was worn out after burning 3 calories, and collapsed to the ground, his sword landing on C. Falcon's head. Peach and Samus ran.
Kirby looked down at Link and Captain Falcon, and pulled out a bomb from nowhere.
"Not… good!" said Captain Falcon.

Ness and Mewtwo were playing chess together. Both being psychic, arguments started up quite quickly.
"You were reading my mind!" exclaimed Mewtwo.
"Was not," said Ness. "But you were cheating, you knew what I was going to do!"
They simultaneously let out great masses of psychic energy aimed at each other. These masses of psychic energy cancelled each other out, but hit the chess board, sending plastic figurines flying in all directions.
A loud explosion sounded from outside.
Mewtwo and Ness looked at each other.
Silence.
"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" laughed Ness.
Mewtwo was, for once, rather amused. "This is actually quite enjoyable."
"Ha ha… yeah, Mewwie," said Ness.
"CALL ME MEWTWO, FOOLISH CHILD!" raged Mewtwo.
"Oh, ha ha ha… okay." Ness suddenly decided that he needed to teach the 'nice kitty' some morals. "It's really funny because it's happening to someone else, Mewtwo. If you suddenly got into a lot of trouble, you wouldn't think it's funny, would you?"
Bowser ironically fell through the ceiling at that moment, landing on top of Ness. Mewtwo knew that there was some hilarious comment that he should make, but he really couldn't think of one at the moment. Not wanting either of them to have him nearby when they recovered, he went out to laugh at Link and Captain Falcon in their faces.

"Samus?" said Peach.
"What?" said Samus.
"You're a bad example to little girls out there."
"Why?"
"Because now they think that it's nice to go around killing innocent creatures for money."
"I never said that."
"Well, you do that all the time."
"It's my job, Peach! I suppose you want girls to think that they should be getting kidnapped by ugly guys?"
Peach gasped. "How dare you! Ladies aren't supposed to stand up and fight for themselves!"
"I don't know what planet you've been living on for the last twenty years, Peach."
Peach pulled of Samus' helmet, and slapped her in the face.
"Eek!" screamed Samus. Samus elbowed Peach in the stomach.
"Ow!" gasped Peach. She punched Samus in the nose.
"Grr," growled Samus, kicking Peach in the chest.
"You censored!" yelled Peach, pulling out a tennis racquet and taking aim. Samus ducked, fired a missile at Peach's head, and rolled over to her helmet.
Peach threw the racquet at Samus, who pulled on her helmet and activated the morph ball.
"Trying to get away?" jeered Peach. "Well, I'll teach you a lesson!" She pulled out a golf club and ran towards the morph ball.
"WOMEN!" she swung and hit Samus across the room.
"DO!" she chased the morph ball down the hall.
"NOT!" she swung the golf club around violently, trying to get Samus.
"ACT!" she dived forward and grabbed at the morph ball.
"VIOLENTLY!" Samus struggled to get out. Peach pulled out an umbrella and began to viciously maul Samus.

--insert shower scene from Psycho--

Link stood up, still completely black. Strangely, Kirby was completely unharmed. Link considered attacking Kirby, then remembered it was too hot to do that. Wearily, he walked inside the Smash Mansion. Ah. A bit cooler. But not really. Maybe if he could find Samus again, he could persuade her to let him use the suit.
"Not so fast!" came a voice.
Link spun around. Standing in the hallway before him was the evil Ganondorf!
"Ha ha! I am Ganondorf! Embodiment of evil, power, wealth, and desire! I am that which blackens the heart of man; I am the destroyer! I will cause the end of all that does good, and cause the reign of all that does evil! For I am the manifestation of Ganon, which is evil itself, and I shall destroy Hyrule, the Smash Mansion, and the universe!"
Link had been slowly backing away for two minutes by the time Ganondorf finished his speech. Realising he had no time left, Link bolted.
"Not so fast, mortal!" cried Ganondorf, chasing Link down the hall. "I was just… um… kidding. I don't want you dead, I want us to be… friends, yeah… friends! Please… slow down… let me kill you… um… with friendship…"
Link ran through a door and realised that it was a storage closet. He was trapped! Oh no!
Ganondorf menacingly stormed up to Link. "Thought you could get away?"
"Please, Ganondorf. You won't get away with this. They'll find my body."
"Link, I thought you were smarter than that. Nobody gives a damn about you."
Link began to cry. "Nobody loves me… nobody wants to be friends… wait, wouldn't my past self care if I die?"
"Good point."
"Actually, if my past self did see me die, then I should remember dying."
"Are you sure?"
"Yep."
"I hate time paradoxes. Maybe… maybe you don't remember yourself dying because I put a memory spell on your younger self."
"Then why am I seeing myself dying now?"
"Because I've removed the spell, idiot!"
"You have?"
"I really have no idea what we're talking about," said Ganondorf, preparing a DEATH SPELL. "Now you must die!" He took aim…
Ganondorf began to mutter the curse…
A large ball of energy appeared…
At that moment, Peach went running and screaming through the hall, waving an umbrella through the air, accidentally KO'ing Ganondorf.
Link stepped out of the storage closet.
Peach was lying face forward at the front door to the mansion.

Samus ran back to where she had left Kirby. Kirby had disappeared, but Captain Falcon was still there. Mewtwo appeared for no particular reason.
C. Falcon flexed his muscles at Samus, and looked at Mewtwo. "Hey! You're that… um… psychic thingy."
"Call me Mewtwo," thought Mewtwo, calmly, but with a slight hint of PSYCHOPATHIC HOMCIDAL PSYCHOCIDAL DEATH ANGER POWER SUPER CHARGE-UP DARK ENERGY HOLY EVIL PLAIN GREAT HUMBLE DEATH THREATS FIRE ICE EARTH AIR WATER EXPLOSION MURDER DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE YOLK JIGGLYPUFF FORCE DESTRUCTION PAIN ANGUISH AGONY TORTURE RAGE in his voice. Just a hint.
"Um… so, Mewtwo," said Captain Falcon, "You have psychic powers?"
"No," Mewtwo responded, using psychokinetic mind rays which transmitted through a finite amount of space in zero time.
"Really?"
"OF COURSE I'M PSYCHIC!" raged Mewtwo.
Samus said, "Calm down, Mewtwo. Captain Falcon is extremely stupid."
"Hey, baby," said C. Falcon. "I'm not the dumbest person in the smash mansion."
"Yes you are," said Samus.
Right on cue, Jigglypuff rolled between Falcon and Samus, and fell into a lake.
"Okay," said Samus. "You're the second dumbest person in the Smash Mansion."
"You humans are psychotic," said Mewtwo.
"Well what about you, Mewtwo?" replied C. Falcon. "You're supposed to be a homicidal maniac."
"Really?"
"Yep. And I bet you'd maul one of us if there weren't any witnesses. You're a crazy killer."
"So if Samus left, I'd murder you?"
"Duh," said Captain Falcon, scratching his butt.
"How interesting."
Captain Falcon noticed that Samus had left.
Silence.
"Um, Mewtwo, about the whole evil psychosis thing? I take it back."
"That's all right, human. It wasn't too insulting. After all, you were right."
Silence.
"Um… I have to go now. It's… an F-Zero race, yeah. An F-Zero race."
Silence.
"Err… good psychic kitty."
Mewtwo narrowed his eyes, briefly revealing a PSYCHOPATHIC HOMCIDAL PSYCHOCIDAL DEATH ANGER POWER SUPER CHARGE-UP DARK ENERGY HOLY EVIL PLAIN GREAT HUMBLE DEATH THREATS FIRE ICE EARTH AIR WATER EXPLOSION MURDER DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE YOLK JIGGLYPUFF FORCE DESTRUCTION PAIN ANGUISH AGONY TORTURE RAGE.
Silence.
Captain Falcon blinked.

Peach woke up and heard shouts of pain. Then she heard thunderclaps, gunshots, and loud, deafening explosions. "Ooh… the tennis is already on," she said. She hopped inside. Finally, she had something to do on this boring, boring, boring, boring, boring, boring, day.