SUMMER DAYS

Disclaimer: I own Jigglypuff. Or at least, I'd like to. My brother agrees that she'd be useful for scaring off hawkers and door-to-door salesmen. But really, I don't own any Nintendo characters. If I did, I can assure you I'd be suing Nintendo right now, not writing some cheap, shoddy, lame story. starts crying

Chapter 5

Ness psychically sensed that Kirby and Pikachu and that round balloon thingy were in big trouble. Zelda, Fox McCloud, Link, Roy and Mario were heading their way. If Ness' friends were caught, his chances of getting a legal GameSpheroid™ were minimal.
Ness used his psychic powers to summon Young Link.

Young Link randomly decided to head towards a bush in the front lawn.

Ness waited impatiently until Young Link arrived inside the bush. "Quick," Ness said. "The adults are going to stop us from getting a GameSpheroid™!"
"The adults are going to stop us from – what?" said Young Link.
"A GameSpheroid™. It's the latest revolution in the history of game consoles. Apparently there's only a 25 chance that it will combust when you first open the packaging, unlike all those other brands which have a 50 chance. It runs stuff up to 3 gazillion times as fast, and it has cool-looking blinking lights!"
Young Link gasped. "They won't let us get the cool flashing lights?"
"That's right! We have to stop them NOW!"
Young Link and Ness burst out of the small bush and readied themselves for combat. They could endure those "soooo cute" talks from the adult Smashers. But preventing them from getting some overpriced console? This meant war…

Donkey Kong was bored. So bored indeed that even breathing made the day seem lively. "Must… get back… to jungle… and kidnap beautiful young… bananas…" he thought.
He wandered towards the giant cathedral sized dining hall. Perhaps he could grab a bit of food and throw some at Mario… yeah, he would. Preferably something large, like an uncooked uncut live steak.
But, alas!, it was too late. Popo was in the process of eating a steak. That, or cereal. But the point is, Donkey Kong saw a small tempting hostage sitting right in front of him. Who people vaguely cared about. If he could get Popo and Nana, he might be able to auction them off on e-Bay for a decent princess. It had been so long…
Popo looked up. "Morning, DK," he said. "What are you doing with that big mallet?"
Donkey Kong aimed carefully.
Bowser and Captain Falcon walked into the hall. "Morning, DK," said Bowser. "Why are you about to hit that kid with a mallet?"
"SHUT UP!" said Donkey Kong, watching Popo running away. He gave chase.
"Some people are so touchy," said Captain Falcon. "Fancy telling us to shut up!"
"That's nice. Now shut up," replied Bowser. "Samus wants you."
"Yeah, right," said Captain Falcon. "Then why doesn't she stop hitting me and start hitting on me?"
"She's playing hard to get. Now I can help you. You see, I am the world's first expert on hitting on all kinds of women," said Bowser modestly.
"So you'll help me?"
"Mmm-hmm. Come with me. I'll show you how it's done."
Bowser and Captain Falcon left the room together. "Now first, you'll want to be wearing tight fitting clothes. Someone as buff as you…"

Mewtwo and Marth were sitting together, laughing. "I never realised Europeans were so stupid!" said Marth.
"They're not all like this. Just most of them. Now SHUT UP AND WATCH BEFORE I TEAR YOUR THROAT OUT!" thought Mewtwo calmly.
"Stop asking me to! Please? Okay, okay!" said Luigi, reading from a book which Falco Lombardi had kindly lent to him. "Fine… 'Please turn the page upside down' – this is getting predictable – 'please turn the page upside down – please turn the page upside down…'"
"Hey, Luigi!" said Marth. "Maybe you should skip to the next page…"
"Thank-a you, that's a good idea!" said Luigi. He turned to the next page and began to read it.
Just as Marth was getting comfortable, however, Mewtwo signalled to him. "What is it?" said Marth. "This is perfectly good entertainment!"
"You want entertainment, human? If we're quick, you're in for a treat."
"Okay," said Marth. "What do we do?"
"Head straight for the front lawn. I'll meet you there in a moment."
Marth ran out of the room, through the door, down the hall, one floor down, cutting through the kitchen…
Marth fell two storeys through a hole in the ground. "Ow!" he said, looking up and making out the outline of burnt plaster. "Why is it so dark in here?" he said, looking around and seeing fused lights. "The power has seriously stuffed up. I'll have to get one of those tech-savvy kids to look at the mains."
He ran the rest of the way, only tripping over Yoshi.

Falco jogged through the dark halls of the smash mansion, listening through his headset to Luigi's running commentary of How to Trick Italian Plumbers. (Yes, he had bugged the room, and heard Marth and Mewtwo's intimate talk, which was also rather interesting.) "Those kids won't get away with this!" he said. "If they think they can steal money and use it to have fun, they've got a surprise coming to them…"

Just as Marth arrived at the front door of the smash mansion, Mewtwo teleported right in front of him.
"We've just made it," thought Mewtwo.
"What's going on?" said Marth.
"Watch and see," said Mewtwo.

Kirby and Pikachu were army crawling across the front lawn, heading for the gates, when Jigglypuff ran up. "Jigglypuff puffy puff jig!" she cried.
"What are you doing here?" said Kirby. "You've just ruined the plan! You're supposed to be distracting the adults!"
"Puh…" said Jigglypuff exasperatedly, pointing across the lawn. Kirby and Pikachu turned to look.
"Uh oh…" said Kirby, squinting into the distance and seeing fate itself.
Zelda and a few of her friends were heading directly towards them. They seemed to be holding pitchforks and torches.
"Pika pi pichu ka?" "Are they after us?"
"What does that mean?" said Kirby. "We'd better move. They're after us!"
They turned for the gates and saw Fox McCloud and Mario waiting for them. "It's an ambush!" cried Kirby. "We won't make it! What do we do?"
"Pika pi pi pika ka ka ka!" "We can fight them!"
"What does that mean? I know, we don't have to run! We can stay and fight!"
"Pika pi pichu!" said Pikachu in an annoyed voice. "I said that!"
"No you didn't," said Kirby, temporarily ignoring the fact that only Pichu, Mewtwo and Ness were able to interpret what Pikachu said well.
"Jig jig puffly!" said Jigglypuff, dancing a bit.
The adults charged.

"You're right," said Marth. "This is way more interesting than looking at Lario wasting his life on join the dot puzzles. Way more interesting."
"His name is Luigi, not Lario, human fool!" raged Mewtwo.
"Yeah, whatever. Mewtwo, why are you so touchy? Are you even capable of ignoring the slightest mistake? A minor misunderstanding? A mispronunciation? A typo?"
"No," said Mewtwo, not taking his eyes off the front lawn.
"Well, that explains a lot," said Marth.

Kirby, Pikachu, and Jigglypuff V.S. Mario, Zelda, Roy, Link and Fox
Kirby swivelled around to grab Fox, and threw him at Link. Pikachu danced around, sending streams of electricity everywhere.
"Um, Pikachu, could you do me a favour?" said Kirby.
"Pika pi?" said Pikachu. "What?"
Kirby opened his mouth and inhaled Pikachu. "Mmm… Pikachu…" he thought. "Wait! He's on my side!" Kirby quickly swallowed. Pikachu randomly appeared next to Kirby.
Kirby and Pikachu bombarded the incoming adults with electric attacks.
Jigglypuff stood, watching the action. Maybe this would be the perfect moment to use her distraction routine to distract the adults! So… one, two, three, four: Cartwheel! "Puh!" Slide! Somersault! Twisting flip! Jump! Sing! Jump! Break dance! Kick! Rap music! Play the tuba! Jump! Hop! Duck! Attempt to fly! Pose! "Jig – guh – ly – puff!" Jumping 512 degree pirouette! Somersault! Twist! Contort! Fighter stance!
Mario picked up Jigglypuff and gracefully threw her into a conveniently placed rake.
"Jigglypuff!" said Jigglypuff, unsure what had just happened.
As Kirby turned into a living fireball, he said "Pikachu! I don't think we can take them all! The five of them against the two of us! We can't win!"
"Pika pi pi pika ka chu!" "We're losing because you keep on stating the obvious like that! Stop it!"

Donkey Kong made a running leap and grabbed Popo. "Ah ha!" he gloated. "Now I have you! I think I'll just hold you hostage!"
Popo struggled to break free, but to no avail. "Why are you picking on me?" he said. "What did I ever do wrong?"
"Nothing personal, kid. You were just at the wrong place at the wrong time. I think you're worth… maybe two thirds of a helpless maiden? I hear kids in Eskimo suits are all the rage right now."
"Donkey Kong, you're a terrible person," said Popo. "Is that all there is to life for you? Kidnapping people and eating disgusting bananas?"
"Don't diss bananas, kid…" growled DK menacingly.
"But surely you'd get lots more satisfaction being useful and worthwhile to your fellow citizens?"
"Hmm…" said Donkey Kong. He had never considered that before. Maybe he'd give this 'nice' thing a shot. Besides, helpless maidens were out of season right now. "Okay, kid. What do you suggest I do?"
"Well, you always make such a mess at the table. Why don't you try washing the dishes?"
"Washing the dishes?" said the ape in absolute astonishment.
"Of course! After all, someone's got to wash them. What, did you think that little elves cast magic spells to clean them?"
"Yes," admitted Donkey Kong. "I had no idea…" He began to cry.
"Don't worry," said Popo. "You can still make up for your ignorance. By… DOING YOUR BIT FOR THE ENVIRONMENT!" he finished with a cheesy grin and a thumbs up directed to no one in particular.
"What?" said Donkey Kong, wondering if Popo had gone mad.
"Never mind. Follow me! We're going to the Enchanted Land of the Dishes!"
"The kitchen?"
"It sounds so crude when you put it that way," sulked Popo.

Jigglypuff was thirsty. She wandered inside and into the kitchen for a cup of sugar water. (It was sugar water because Jigglypuff is sweet! Ha ha ha ha… that's your cue to laugh with me, not at me… ha ha… it's not working, is it?)
When she went in, she encountered Bowser and Captain Falcon. Bowser was encouraging Captain Falcon to apply essence of vegetable (boiled cabbage) to his body. "It really adds to that shine," he explained. "It really enhances that buff look of yours… mmm… oh my, you are good looking… that is, to women… and not to me… because… er… I'm straight… you missed your left ear…"
Jigglypuff walked between them and poured herself some lovely sugar water with a hint of sugar, and drank it all in a single gulp.
"What is that noise?!" shouted Captain Falcon, spinning around. "Oh, it's just Donkey Kong doing something for us."
He turned back to Bowser, who continued to apply massage oil onto Captain Falcon lovingly (not, of course, that Bowser enjoyed it, because he didn't. Really.)
"Wait!" cried Captain Falcon, spinning around to face DK again. "You aren't the helpful kind! What are you up to?" he said suspiciously.
Donkey Kong shrugged. "Just trying to find my purpose in life," he explained, finishing the last silver platter.
"Great!" exclaimed Popo. "Now, let's see…"
"What else can I do to help other people?" cried Donkey Kong eagerly. "Doing my bit for the community is fun!" DK and Popo turned and did a little dance, culminating in a thumbs up.
"Do your bit for the community!" they said together.
"Er… I don't mean to be rude," said Captain Falcon. "But what you two just said… who are you talking to?"
"No-one," they said, winking conspiratorially at thin air.
"I know!" said Popo. "Just before you kidnapped me, I heard Kirby and Pikachu talking. Kirby was saying something about a toy that he really wanted but probably wouldn't be able to get. Maybe you could make them really happy by buying it for them!"
"Yes!" said Donkey Kong. "Popo, that is a brilliant idea! I can't wait to see the happy look on Kirby's face when I give it to him… this is going to be great!"
Bowser waved a paw. "Don't go out the front door. There's a full scale war happening at the lawn. Order it off "
"Thanks, Bowser, old friend!" said Donkey Kong. He and Popo left together.
Bowser finished applying nail polish to Captain Falcon's eyebrows. "Oh… you look sexy, Captain…" he breathed. "Wait! I mean… Samus will for for you just like that… so good looking…"
Jigglypuff got herself a thirty-second cup of sugar water and drank it happily.
"Wait!" said C. Falcon. "Aren't you supposed to be in the battle down there?"
"Oops," thought Jigglypuff. She had forgotten all about the battle. Throwing a cup half full of sugar water at Captain Falcon, Jigglypuff quickly took the chef's hat off, and dashed out of the room. Via the window. And fell. Out of the window. Her friends would be losing without her to help!

"You know," remarked Kirby, dodging Link's hookshot, "now that Jigglypuff is out of the way, I'm finding it a lot easier to evade the enemy."
"Pi ku," acknowledged Pikachu. "Me too."
Jigglypuff dashed back onto the battle field, and was promptly thrown by Roy straight into Kirby's face.
Immediately the adults surrounded Pikachu, Kirby and Jigglypuff.
"See what I mean?" said Kirby. "She's bad luck." He stood up, preparing to make a final desperate stand against the adults. But, obviously, they had no hope save the slim chance that Ness and Nana would show up and save the day.
Ness and Nana showed up and saved the day.
The fight had erupted into a fierce collection of minor battles.
Zelda and Link were fighting the two Pokemon together. Pikachu turned Jigglypuff on her side and gave her a good push. Jigglypuff went rolling straight into Link. Link picked her up and turned her to face him.
Big mistake.
Jigglypuff pounced, grabbing onto Links face and holding on tightly. Screaming, Link went running around in random directions.
Zelda uttered a magical spell and auras of magical lights surrounded her. She was beginning her transformation to Sheik. Chanting voices and mystic music filled the air as her clothes began to swivel around, changing texture…
Pikachu walked up and threw her towards a lake.
Ness and Nana tackled Mario and Roy. Ness used PK Flash to send Mario flying high into the air. Roy prepared his FIREY SWORD OF DEATH.
Nana was used to quickly adapting to difficult situations. On the spur of the moment, she grabbed Ness and threw him at Roy. But before Ness made contact, Roy spun around and grabbed Ness. He kicked ness straight at Nana, who deflected Ness with his mallet. Roy jabbed Ness back at Nana with his sword.
At that moment, Princess Peach arrived. "Free tennis racquets!" she called.
Nana and Roy broke up their fight for a moment to grab some, then continued to pummel Ness at each other. Eventually Nana smashed the racquet with perfect aim. Screaming, Ness went zooming straight towards Roy. Roy put up a shield, and Ness ricocheted straight up.
In midair, Ness grabbed Mario, who was just beginning to fall down again.
"Mamma mia!" cried Mario. "You are-a going to kill us both!"
Ness looked down and realised that grabbing Mario hadn't done anything whatsoever to slow his fall. "Oh, sorry, Mario," said he.
"Oh well, it is-a nothing. This is a war; we are enemies. It is-a natural."
"Still, is so blasted annoying to be rocketing off like this again," said Ness.
They spiralled off into the distance, and turned into a star 'cause I said so.
Back to the others. Kirby and Fox were fighting fiercely. Kirby tried to slip past Fox, but whenever he tried, Fox turned on that weird mirror thing. Finally, Kirby decided on an alternate strategy. He inhaled a nearby pebble to become… STONE KIRBY! With the awesome ability to turn to… well, if you don't know, you're in trouble. A lot of it, too. Sorry, where was I? Oh, yes. So Kirby jumped up above Fox, and floated in the air above him.
"Ha!" said Fox, running to keep directly underneath Kirby. "You thought I'd fall for that? Well, I've got bad news for you! You can't possible stay up there long enough – oh. Aaaaaaaaaaaah!"
Kirby, living up to the funny little hat he was wearing, turned into a large block of stone and landed directly on top of Fox, pushing him deep into the ground.
Fox quickly scrambled out, only to be eaten by Kirby. Kirby inhaled Fox and undertook a mystical transformation into… FOX KIRBY! No, he did not turn into Fox (ha! Tricked you!). Instead, he donned a fake pair of ears and created an exact copy of Fox's blaster out of thin air.
Fox and Kirby jumped into the air and began a spectacular firefight. There were twists, dodges, and… to make a long story short, imagine any action scene you've ever seen which uses guns, and substitute Fox and Kirby into it. Yes, it was like that. Except without the exciting music.
Eventually, Fox and Kirby had shot each other so many times that they were both on the brink of exhaustion. Kirby floated up above Fox, and prepared a finishing Rock Drop move.
"Oh no," thought Fox, waiting for the evitable (Hint: I didn't say inevitable. Guess what that means?)
Kirby, still wearing the fake fox ears, began the magical transformation into a rock…
"Not so fast!" cried Falco Lombardi, dashing onto the screen. "I'll take that impostor for you, Fox, old pal!" He immediately launched a barrage of laser shots into the air. Every single one hit its mark.
Falco did a super kick, pushing his target deep into the ground. "Ha! Looks as if you aren't so good after all, Kirby. Fox, I guess it's your turn to be thankful."
"You moron," said Fox weakly from three metres below the ground. "I'm Fox!"
"What?" said Falco. "But… how… but I thought he was Fox! He looks like Fox. He's even wearing his trademark headset!"
"It's a costume, for crying out – Falco, could you help me out here?"
Falco leant down into the ground to help Fox out. "Ow!" he cried. "What did you hit me for?"
"Oh, sorry, I thought you were Kirby trying to finish me off."
"Oh. Well, that's okay. Here, let me give you a hand." Falco reached down. "Ouch! What the hell was that for?
"Sorry," said Fox, grabbing Falco's hand. "But you can't trick me. You're Kirby. After all, you have two eyes…" Fox smiled.
"Oh SHOOT!" said Falco as he was pulled down under as well. "Ow! Get off! Help me! NO, don't hurt the wing… don't AUUUUUUUURGH! Stop! I'm SORRY! PLEEEEEEEEEASE!"
Kirby quickly scanned the battle field. Well, now that everyone else was busy, he had better sneak out before anyone noticed.
Kirby calmly waddled out the front gates, ignoring all the mayhem behind him.

"I know," said Bowser. "This should really impress Samus, Mr. Action. Aww… action… you… sorry, I meant: Popo just suggested a toy that the kids would like. What if you bought it, and gave it to the kids -"
"What good would that do?" said Captain Falcon. "Samus wouldn't use it."
"You idiot! You give it to the kids in front of Samus!"
"Right, I get it! So then she thinks I'm a caring person who's worth doing it with! Hot golly, I think this plan of yours will work, Bowser!"
"Indeed. So get onto the Internet, and try to find a copy to buy."
"Wait… wasn't Donkey Kong about to buy it for the kids? Damn. Now I'll never impress Samus. And it's all your fault," he said, tears forming in his eyes.

--insert romantic music—
"Don't worry," said Bowser. "All isn't lost. You see, Donkey Kong won't buy it."
"Oh?" said Captain Falcon angrily. "And why not, may I ask?"
"Because the website address I gave him is fake. There's nothing there. And knowing him, he'll keep trying again and again, while you sweep Samus off her feet. Literally and figuratively, of course."
"The web site doesn't exist?"
"The web site doesn't exist."

"The web site exists!" cried Popo in shock. "I could have sworn that nobody in their right minds would book a domain like that. I mean, the expenses, when compared to the ratio between popularity and maintenance and random -"
"I'm sorry," interrupted Donkey Kong. "But now that we're on the site, what do I do?"
"Oh, sorry. Well, first you click that button which says, 'Cheap GameSpheroid™'. Got it?"
"Yep."
"Now, enter in Mario's credit card number -"
"I'm so glad I copied it down last week," said Donkey Kong, typing it in.
"- and press that button."
"What, the red one saying 'DEATH!'?"
"No, the blue one: 'Fulfil your purpose in life by making children happy'."
"Oh, right," said Donkey Kong, clicking on the corresponding button.

Ganondorf sneaked up onto the battlefield. "Ha!" he said, voicing his thoughts out loud. "While everyone else is fighting, I shall finally be able to get rid of Link for once and for all!" Ganondorf waved his arms and chanted, preparing a spell of pain, hallucination and DEATH.
Fortunately for Link, Ganondorf was so preoccupied that he failed to notice Nana and Falco fighting right behind him. "Die, impostor!" cried Falco, firing a couple dozen blaster shots at Nana, all of which hit Ganondorf instead.
"Curses!" cried Ganondorf, as his cursing curse went accursedly awry. "These cursed mortals have cursed my curse before I could (curse)ing finish cursing Link with the accursed aforementioned curse! –insert curse-- it!"
Ganondorf's spell hit Link and Jigglypuff, but instead of being a curse of pain, hallucination and DEATH, Ganondorf had conveniently missed the death part, and thus it was only a curse of pain and hallucination.
"Aah!" said Link. "It burns! It burns!" (He probably said this because he was in pain.)
"Jigglypuff!" said Jigglypuff happily, completely ignoring the pain.
Link and Jigglypuff collapsed and hallucinated a lot.
Yeah.
So…
Er…
Right! So, anyway, Pikachu and Zelda were shooting strange projectile attacks at each other. Eventually… Zelda won. How? Well… let's say… that Pikachu surrendered… because he was hungry…

A helicopter flew in directly over the smash mansion and dropped two crates inside.
Donkey Kong and Popo were sitting, waiting, when one of the crates crashed through the ceiling and landed in front of them.
DK opened it. "Wow! This is a GameSpheroid™?"
"No, that's the instruction manual."
"Right," said Donkey Kong, not understanding a word of that.
Popo reached inside and pulled out perfection itself. The GameSpheroid™ glittered and shined and let off random beeping noises every few seconds. Popo and DK stared in awe at the magical aura emanating from the orb.
"I can see the appeal," whispered DK, getting onto his knees.

"Wow!" said Bowser. "Talk about instant delivery!"
"Amazing…" said Captain Falcon. "I only clicked the 'Buy' button ten seconds ago and it's here already…" They both stared at the GameSpheroid™.

Ness and Mario landed in a random shopping centre. "Ow!" they both exclaimed.
Ness turned around and saw it. "Oh my…" he whispered. "Look, Mario! There it is! The thing we've been fighting over!"
"Natasha's Lingerie Store?" said Mario, puzzled.
"No, over there!" said Ness, turning and pointing to the store just to the left of there. "A GameSpheroid™. The ultimate in game consoles, at least for the next three days. This is what we were fighting over."
"Amazing," muttered Mario. "I don't-a mind you kids-a getting this…"
"Really?" said Ness, suddenly switching into 'pleading cute baby' mode. "Please can we get it? We'll be good? We're cute! We love trees!"
"Of course-a, Ness."
"Wait… then why were you fighting with Zelda and co.?"
"Because she lied to me! She said you were trying to buy a GamePyramid."
"Oh… I see. That explains it. After all, everyone knows that GamePyramids are rip-offs and not worth buying. The only way to go is the GameSpheroid™!"
Ness winked at an imaginary camera.
"Now, let us-a buy it."
"Can you afford it? It costs $65535.99!"
"Don't-a worry. I'll use my credit card! And I must ask Falco to give back that $65536 I lent him yesterday to look at. That-a will easily cover it!"

"Gee," said Captain Falcon and Donkey Kong simultaneously. "I don't know whether Mario will be happy when he finds out I bought this with his credit card!"
"Don't worry," said Bowser and Popo simultaneously. "He never uses it anyway."

Kirby waddled into a store, bought a GameSpheroid™ with the $65536 he had 'borrowed' from Falco, and looked at the extra cent.
He went into a candy store.
"One candy flavoured lollipop, please," he said to the cashier.
"If you have an extra cent, you'll be eligible for our special offer: two for the price of two!"
"Ooh…" said Kirby. "But I don't have an extra cent."
"Oh, okay." The cashier suddenly recognised Kirby. "AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGGGHH!" cried the cashier, running away.
"Bye?" said Kirby, watching.
He shrugged.
Candy was good to eat. And now that nobody else was looking, he could eat all the candy in the store!
Where to start?

Link woke up, and saw mists swirling around him.
"What's going on?" he cried.
A shadowy figure appeared in the distance.
"Who are you?" said Link.
"I… am… the ghost… of… your late father…"
"Why are you here?"
"I must warn you…"
"What?"
"I was… murdered…"
"No, you weren't."
"Shut up… I was murdered… by Ganondorf…"
"No, you weren't."
"Ganondorf… is evil…"
"Duh."
"He poured… poison… into my nose…"
"Are you on drugs or something?" said Link to the mystic ghost as multicoloured mist swirled around him and fairies played. "Wait! You mean Ganondorf poisoned you? But I thought… --insert implausible plot device which prevents people from being poisoned--!"
"It wasn't normal poison… it was magic poison…"
"What, dark light holy electric fire air deathbed life birth pain pleasure potion?"
"You've never tasted Zelda's cooking, have you?"
"Are you insane?" said Link to his father's ghost as millions of living chains and strands of magical computer screens danced around an infinite number of bonfires in the moonlight behind a rainbow.
"No… you are insane… you're imagining me…"
"That can't be! I don't have any imagination!"
"Loser…"

Jigglypuff hallucinated.
A magical giant blackberry appeared before her.
"Wow!" thought Jigglypuff. "The magic blackberry!" She turned herself upside down so as to better hear the wisdom of the blackberry.
"Jigglypuff… you have done well… but evil still reigns… you must shift the balance… at noon, you must hide inside a vase, and sing Christmas carols… and then draw pictures on Pichu's face… do you understand?"
Jigglypuff nodded.

"Have you ever got the feeling that life is far-fetched?" said Peach to Yoshi.
"Yoshi!" said Yoshi.

Jigglypuff and Link woke up on a mattress in some room.
"What happened?" said Link.
"Jigglypuff!" said Jigglypuff.
Link looked outside the window. "I think the fight is over."
Jigglypuff scanned the room. No vases! How would she carry out the orders of the mystic blackberry now? Jigglypuff then had an idea: go somewhere else! She searched a chest of drawers, just to make sure, then exited the room. Via the window. And fell. Out of the window.

Now, you're probably wondering what happened to Young Link. Well, he got stuck in a tree. See? No plot inconsistencies whatsoever.

"See?" thought Mewtwo. "This is really enjoyable, human."
"I don't know…" said Marth. "Luigi was funnier." He went back inside.
"You people have no taste whatsoever," thought Mewtwo.