Disclaimer: I am JK Rowling. All this belongs to me. That's why I'm wasting my time writing on , duh. Oh, the name Happydales is borrowed from the movie Arsenic and Old Lace.
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Somewhere in England, not too far from Hogwarts, there is a small muggle town. Just outside that down there is an old house, well-maintained but without many modern conveniences. Until 15 years or so ago, it was occupied by a quiet old couple, but when they moved away and a mysterious young man moved in, the whispers began. The story in the town is that he teaches science at some expensive public boarding school. That certainly explains why he's away most of the year, and why strange sounds can be heard some calm summer evenings, coming from his basement.
Most people are a bit frightened of this man, and quite glad he almost never comes into town. A few brave boys try to disturb his peace every now and again. They usually come back pale-faced, wide-eyed and much better behaved.
At the time of this story, the house's occupant was just settling in for a nice, quiet summer. He looked just as the townspeople describe him: tall and pale, with greasy black hair and a crooked nose. He was, as the townspeople said, a public school professor. They were even close on the subject. Professor Severus Snape taught potions, which was about as close to muggle science as wizardry came.
On this particular summer morning, Severus had just settled down with a cup of coffee and a copy of the Daily Prophet, and begun to read the front page story (which featured a cheery Cornelius Fudge shaking hands with the short, red-headed Irish ambassador.) Three lines into the story, the doorbell rang. Severus was startled, this was a rather rare occurrence.
Throwing on a quick charm to show muggle clothes instead of robes, Severus got to his feet to answer the door. Opening it, he was surprised to find a short old woman on the other side. She wore a white shawl, and her hair was dyed a rather vibrant sort of red. "Ah, Mr. Snape. I'm glad to see you're home" she said cheerily.
"Who are you?" asked Severus bluntly, looking down at her with some disdain.
"I'm Mrs. Denair, I run the grocery store in town" she replied. "I've come to you to ask for something of a favor."
"I'm sorry, I simply don't have the time to-" Severus tried to close the door, but she stuck her foot in to block it.
"It's my brother, you see. He teaches science at a summer educational camp, but he's fallen quite ill and he'll be hospitalized for the next week. The camp starts in three days, and if he doesn't find a replacement for him he won't be able to come back next month. It's only a week, and the lesson plan has already been written- I'm sure it won't be any trouble" she said, all in one breath.
"I really am quite busy, and you really can't ask me to-" for the second time in five minutes, Severus was interrupted by Mrs. Denair. This time, it was a loud gasp on her part, which caused Severus to turn around to check what she was staring at. The Daily Prophet lay open on his chair, moving wizard pictures and all. He turned back to the woman at his door, who had an expression not unlike a first year Slytherin who'd just caught their worst enemy cheating on a test. For awhile none of them spoke, but it was quite obvious what Mrs. Denair was thinking: If you do this for me, I'll forget I ever saw that.
The normal course of action for a wizard was clear: cast a quick Obliviate charm and be done with the whole matter. Severus had had the displeasure of meeting one of the world's experts in the Obliviate charm, which made it all the more embarrassing that he had never once in his life been able to cast it correctly. There was the second option, calling the Ministry, but Severus was not on the best terms with them, and by the time they arrived to control the situation the entire town could be talking about alien conspiracies, or secret service plots, or any number of other ridiculous stories that no wizard would want in the local papers.
Severus took a deep breath, and nodded. "Excellent!" said Mrs. Denair, smiling cheerily again. "Here are the papers you'll need. I'll call the other councilors and tell them you'll take the job. Thank you very much Mr. Snape, and I do hope you have a good time at Happydales."
With that, she handed him a large file folder filled with papers, closed the door and was gone. Severus looked down at the file, labeled "Happydales Summer Fun Educational Camp Science Fun Plans"
This was going to be a long week.
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I do not yet have a beta reader for this story, so I apologize for any mistakes. If you are interested in beta reading for me, drop me a comment with contact information.