A/N: The hilarity begins
Chapter Ten
After setting out from Rivendell, there was almost no conversation. Kelsey was afraid of Legolas, Jenneva realized she was in the company of nine adult males, and Carolyn was contemplating life without her straightening iron. Kelsey was also disappointed that nothing had happened between Jenneva and Glorfindel. She had set up many rendezvous between the two, but nothing had happened. Since her first attempt had failed, Kelsey put her mind to hatching a foolproof plan.
Upon reaching a high point which the girls recognized as where Sauramon's birdies flew around, the hobbits began swordplay lessons.
"Hey, don't we get swords?" asked Carolyn.
"Women cannot fight," spat Boromir.
"Oh really?" the three asked, and charged.
They brought down Boromir and pinned him. Jenneva sat on his chest, and Kelsey had her knees on his arms. Carolyn sat on his legs, and was smiling triumphantly.
"Girls can't fight, huh? HUH?!? Stupid Jackass."
Carolyn was about to go on, but Legolas yelled about the birds. The girls scrambled off of Boromir, and Kelsey realized in horror that Fabio was on the other side of the camp. She sprinted towards him, but Legolas reached him first. Grabbing Kelsey, he hid them under a low hanging cliff, their bodies pressed tightly to the back of the rock face.
Kelsey could feel herself blush at his proximity, and once the birds were gone, rolled away from him as if he had burned her. She grabbed the baby carrier, and spotting Jenneva, ran over to her.
"I touched him. Jenneva, I actually had physical contact with him! I think I'm going to faint."
"Kelsey, I think you're getting a little TOO obsessed. I think it would be fairer to Legolas if you actually acted like your usual self. Don't hold back. Just let all of your love flow out."
Jenneva wasn't trying to be completely evil, but she had begun to get bored and could use a little entertainment.
Besides, I suffered enough with Glorfindel! She deserves a little embarrassment of her own.
Kelsey, trusting Jenneva wholeheartedly, left Fabio with her and marched towards the prince of Mirkwood. Carolyn, who had been lecturing Boromir about the equality between men and women, spotted Kelsey and went to stop her.
"Uh, Kelsey, what are you doing?"
"I am going to profess my undying love to Legolas," she replied, starry eyed.
"Uh, not a good idea, bubba."
"Why not," asked a truly confused Kelsey.
Carolyn put an arm around Kelsey's shoulders and led her away, talking of the wonders of subtly. (A/N: who decided to spell subtly like that? A moron, that's who. LOL, CAROLYN:: W, not a moron)
My plan has been thwarted by that bitch! How dare she spoil my wonderful design! This means war!
Sorry so short, fourth chapter in one day! I have the opposite of writer's block. And this chappie sets the mood (kinda, for the next few chapters).
Rohanshieldbitch: BE PATIENT
Blackbeltchick: BE PATIENT, lol, jk. You will come into my story soon. Just wait, you will wreak havoc!
Breck: I LOVE YOU!!! And your story (Carolyn recommended it) kicks ass!
OK, people. Less romance (thank god) and more humor. My phase for bad, horrible, cheesy, awful, terrible, dreadful, appalling, ghastly, horrific, and dire romances s OVER!! (don't you just LOVE synonyms!?)
Chapter Ten
After setting out from Rivendell, there was almost no conversation. Kelsey was afraid of Legolas, Jenneva realized she was in the company of nine adult males, and Carolyn was contemplating life without her straightening iron. Kelsey was also disappointed that nothing had happened between Jenneva and Glorfindel. She had set up many rendezvous between the two, but nothing had happened. Since her first attempt had failed, Kelsey put her mind to hatching a foolproof plan.
Upon reaching a high point which the girls recognized as where Sauramon's birdies flew around, the hobbits began swordplay lessons.
"Hey, don't we get swords?" asked Carolyn.
"Women cannot fight," spat Boromir.
"Oh really?" the three asked, and charged.
They brought down Boromir and pinned him. Jenneva sat on his chest, and Kelsey had her knees on his arms. Carolyn sat on his legs, and was smiling triumphantly.
"Girls can't fight, huh? HUH?!? Stupid Jackass."
Carolyn was about to go on, but Legolas yelled about the birds. The girls scrambled off of Boromir, and Kelsey realized in horror that Fabio was on the other side of the camp. She sprinted towards him, but Legolas reached him first. Grabbing Kelsey, he hid them under a low hanging cliff, their bodies pressed tightly to the back of the rock face.
Kelsey could feel herself blush at his proximity, and once the birds were gone, rolled away from him as if he had burned her. She grabbed the baby carrier, and spotting Jenneva, ran over to her.
"I touched him. Jenneva, I actually had physical contact with him! I think I'm going to faint."
"Kelsey, I think you're getting a little TOO obsessed. I think it would be fairer to Legolas if you actually acted like your usual self. Don't hold back. Just let all of your love flow out."
Jenneva wasn't trying to be completely evil, but she had begun to get bored and could use a little entertainment.
Besides, I suffered enough with Glorfindel! She deserves a little embarrassment of her own.
Kelsey, trusting Jenneva wholeheartedly, left Fabio with her and marched towards the prince of Mirkwood. Carolyn, who had been lecturing Boromir about the equality between men and women, spotted Kelsey and went to stop her.
"Uh, Kelsey, what are you doing?"
"I am going to profess my undying love to Legolas," she replied, starry eyed.
"Uh, not a good idea, bubba."
"Why not," asked a truly confused Kelsey.
Carolyn put an arm around Kelsey's shoulders and led her away, talking of the wonders of subtly. (A/N: who decided to spell subtly like that? A moron, that's who. LOL, CAROLYN:: W, not a moron)
My plan has been thwarted by that bitch! How dare she spoil my wonderful design! This means war!
Sorry so short, fourth chapter in one day! I have the opposite of writer's block. And this chappie sets the mood (kinda, for the next few chapters).
Rohanshieldbitch: BE PATIENT
Blackbeltchick: BE PATIENT, lol, jk. You will come into my story soon. Just wait, you will wreak havoc!
Breck: I LOVE YOU!!! And your story (Carolyn recommended it) kicks ass!
OK, people. Less romance (thank god) and more humor. My phase for bad, horrible, cheesy, awful, terrible, dreadful, appalling, ghastly, horrific, and dire romances s OVER!! (don't you just LOVE synonyms!?)