A/N: WARNING: Drinking and slightly sexual activities and implications. Oh, and the lines you recognize from Carrots of the Pirabbean are from Pirates of the Caribbean. I can type, really i can. I'm not as think as you drunk i am :P

nienna-yavetil: Thankee very much! ahh, physcic!! You can see all the scary thoughts going on in my head. The goings on in my story are only the tip of the iceberg....LEGOLAS!!!!pulls hot sexy hot elven prince out of computer screen and starts molesting him....mwahahaha!! Thanks thanks thanks!!

BBC: (As per request) Galdadriel needs to get her kicks wherever she can...And yes, i'm looking for Celeborn, i seem to have lost him somewhere, have you seen him?

Maidens-of-the-Dragon's-Zodiac:Thanks for the elvish etymology lesson.

Polly: uhhhh, NO! jk :)

rohanshieldbitch: iff you dont know what i was getting at with the hair comment you dont deserve to know!!

VAMPIREKAT69: Thanks

Animegoddess177: i don't know if i'm gonna keep going, depends on what you guys (the readers) want. Thanks for the encouragement:).

Chapter Seventeen

"AHHHHH!" screamed Carolyn, until a hand clamped over her mouth.

"Shhhh, its just me, Boromir. Calm down."

Carolyn nodded, and she was released. Boromir went over to a lantern and turned it up.

Kelsey and Jenneva were standing there, shocked. They had been so scared they hadn't even screamed. The still weren't moving, so Carolyn slapped them both across the face.

"Hey! What was that for?"

"You guys were statues. No c'mon, time to get rip-roaring drunk," explained Carolyn. She walked over to a barrel and recognized the elvish sign for G. "This is the one Galadriel was telling us about."

"How can you tell?" asked Jenneva.

"I recognize the 'G' from the book, the part where Gandalf leaves his sign on a rock at Weathertop or something."

"Oh. Well, crack it open."

A minute later, all four sat around a table with a glass of wine.

"To Gandalf," said Carolyn.

"To Gandalf," repeated Jenneva.

"To world peace," said Kelsey.

"To Gondor," whispered Boromir.

All four drank deeply. The wine wasn't particularly strong, so a minute later all glasses were empty. Boromir was dubbed the drink re-filler, and he was good at his job. Within an hour, the four friend all had nicknames for each other.

"Borry, why is yer daddy so mean to yer baby bruther?" slurred Carolyn.

"I dunno, Harry."

"I told you not to call me Harry."

"Well, if da shoe fits," said Kelsey.

"Hen, you need to nuncee-....eenuncee---speak clearer."

"Kay kay, Meep."

"Hey guys, lets sing a song!" yelled hairy Carolyn (A/N: oops, I mean Harry/Carolyn)

"Okay, how about....the pirate song!" yelled Meep/Jenneva.

"Yay!" was Kelsey/Hen's enthusiastic response. "Okay, Borry, it goes like this. Ready girls?"

"We're devils, we're black sheep, we're really bad eggs. Drink up, me hearties, Yo ho!

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirates life for me!"

"I love this song!" crooned Kelsey. "When I get my ship back, I'm gonna teach it to the whole crew."

"And you shall be pozzitivitivityly the most farsome pirates in the Spanish spain," slurred Carolyn

"That's not 'ow it goes. Then 'gain, who am I to tlak. I'm drunk! Tlak, tlak!" yelled Jenneva.

"Well I don't know how it goes, either, but I know that you guys are the best friends I've ever had. And I can say that, cuz in the morning I wont remember a thing," he said, smiling.

"Group hug!"

Jenneva and Kelsey pulled away, but Carolyn still held on to Boromir. She looked at him, and he looked at her.

Jenneva interrupted the moment by belching, loudly. How something so big could come out of someone so small was beyond any of them. Well, she would have interrupted the moment if they were sober. But seeing as how they weren't, Boromir leaned down and kissed Carolyn. She kissed him back, and Kelsey and Jenneva snuck out of the room, giggling.

About five minutes and a glass of wine later, both girls headed back into the room to find their friends. Boromir had his shirt off and his pants half down, making the two girls shriek. Carolyn was still clothed, because the damn zipper on her coat (Which she ALWAYS wears) wouldn't unzip. Carolyn was sitting on the floor, trying to maneuver the zipped coat over her head (no mean feat for a sober person), when Jenneva and Kelsey interceded. Ignoring Carolyn's groans of frustration, Kelsey pulled her to her feet.

"Carrorrolililili-Harry, what have I told you 'bout guarding yer carnal treshure?"

"Um, that I should guard it?"

"That's right," said Kelsey nodding.

A brief pause.

"Oh, to hell with it, I'm gonna go find Legolas."

"But, but, Henny, wut 'bout yer carnival thingy-madoo? And why does Borry still have his pants down?" asked Jenneva, highly confused.

"It busted out. I'm gonna go find my hot sexy hot prince, I need some...whateva. And really, Borry, you've seen one, you've seen 'em all..."

"Nedd some whateva?....What, outercourse? No, I'm not gonna let your leave if yer gonna go hav sex," said Carolyn, wobbling with her hands on hips.

"You got it, baby. Wait, baby. Wonder who's babysitting...I think I'd better go chack," said Kelsey deviously.

"Yeah, some weirdo could have him, you better go...Jenneva, why don't you go find a nice hobbit...Come 'ere, Borry, I wasn't done with you..."