DISCLAIMER: Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

JK Rowling owns Harry Potter,

And that makes me blue.

6, September, 9:04, Dormitory,

Ah glorious, glorious Saturday. I hope whoever thought up the weekend lived a long and happy life. Lily has gone down to the Pitch to fly (I would bet money accompanied by a certain dark haired fellow who at one point she CLAIMED to hate) or I would make her listen to my whole account of last night's Sirius adventure.

I think I'll go down to the common room and have Chris S. beat my ass at chess. Oh wait we're fighting. Shit. Ok, then maybe I'll go to the library and begin my massive amount of Arithmancy homework.

Things That Hardly Ever work out well:

1) Dating your friends

2) Murder

3) Splitting up in horror movies

4) Playing Dodgeball with rageaholics

5) Pissing Al Pacino off

6, September, 11: 39, Common Room,

I found a section of muggle films while I was procrastinating (god this new Arithmancy stuff is hard) and ended up watching Cool Hand Luke which proved to be one of the coolest movies ever created (except I sort of hated the ending with a passion). I am replacing Sir Percy with him on my list of sexy guys (sorry Blakeney but you just can't beat a smart-ass).

6, September, 1:12, Common Room,

I was going down to have lunch in the great hall (minding my own business) and out of the blue James Potter yells for me to come over to him. I glanced around and seeing that besides a few first years finishing up some homework the common room was empty (can't be seen fraternizing with the enemy) decided it was safe to see what he wanted.

"Yes?" I asked, a little rudely but in all fairness the man was in the process of stealing my best friend. Hostility should have been expected.

He seemed a little unsure of himself (a first I'm sure) and my rudeness didn't seem to bolster his confidence. "Well I was wondering if we could talk." He said finally.

"I was on my way to lunch." I said, not wanting to stay.

"I brought food so we could talk all lunch." He said pulling a knapsack out from under the table.

Stupid, stupid, stupid, I thought, now I'm trapped. "All right." I said and pulled out a chair.

The real intent of this luncheon became clear only moments into it when James coolly asked, "so you've known Lily from day one at Hogwarts right?"

"Yes." I agreed, a little confused. Is this normal behavior for a friend thief?

"And what would you say her opinion of me is?" He asked, his calm slipping a few notches.

For a few seconds I had no idea how to answer. Was this a trick question? Was he kidding? Lily had always made it perfectly clear (up until a few weeks ago of course) she hated his guts into oblivion and back again.

"I would say that probably her behavior would be more indicative then anything I could say." I said finally, giving him a piercing I-know-you've-been-romancing-my-best-friend-on-the-Quidditch-pitch-you-dirty-scoundrel stare.

And I guess in a strange way my stair worked because he did confess, just in a manner that made me wish I had made up a much better excuse not to talk with him. "But that's the point." He nearly wailed. "Her behavior is indicative of nothing at all. Sometimes she seems interested and at least she isn't shouting at me anymore but sometimes she seems like she's only being nice because it's the polite thing to do. Like I am some nuisance to be tolerated."

And he looked so distraught at this notion I burst out laughing. As if Lily would tolerate someone just to be nice! The idea was ridiculous; she was just brutally honest by nature. For a second I considered letting him continue to think that in hopes of keeping my friendship a little while longer but in the end I couldn't do it: he looked to damn pathetic.

"What we have here is a failure to communicate." I said, in my best Cool Hand Luke voice.

James missed the reference. "How so?" He asked.

"If Lily will give you the time of day, she'll give you her life. Some how you have landed yourself on her good list and though she may at times seem disinterested I doubt it means anything."

James nodded. "I thought of that and if you think so to then it's probably true."

It felt nice to be so trusted and he seemed so relieved but I still couldn't help but feel depressed. We sat in silence for a few moments, eating the good but simple fare James had nicked from the kitchen. And it was all very awkward until James is all like, "do you think you could put in a good word for me with Lily?"

Of all the nerve! This man is stealing my best friend and is now asking me to help him! Well I decided to put an end to it right then and there. "Look James POTTER," I snarled. "If you are going to try to steal Lily that's your prerogative but don't expect me to help you out you heartless bastard!"

And I attempted to storm from the room but I only got about halfway to the stairs before James stopped me dead in my tracks. "You think I'm stealing Lily?" He sounded shocked.

I turned around, even angrier now. "Duh that's what you're doing."

"And that's why you've been so hostile towards me?"

"You're really brilliant aren't you?" I said in the most mean, sarcastic voice I could manage.

"No, just stunned." He said slowly. "Lily would never leave you and you must know that Emily. Do you have any idea how much she talks about you? It's always 'And then Emily and I did this' or 'Emily said' no matter what we talk about."

I blinked, as flattered as I was placated. "She talks about me?"

"All the time. You're her favorite person." He told me. I beamed, suddenly feeling much better about James than I ever had before. "So will you put in a good word for me?"

I nodded. "Of course!" I agreed.

Except now I have no idea how to gracefully bring up James Potter to Lily in a good way.

7, September, 11:11, Common Room,

I told Lily what happened last night with Sirius.

"So you like him then?" She said.

"No!" I said a little too quickly. "I mean yes, as a friend, but just as a friend."

She didn't look like she bought it. "Then you're completely unaffected by his sexy but casual dark hair, his deep soulful blue eyes, his rippling abs and sensual kissable lips?" She was making fun of me.

"Oh shut it Lily." I said grouchily.

OH SHIT HAVE MASSIVE AMOUNT OF ARITHMANCY HOMEWORK LEFT TO DO!

7, September, 12: 39, Library,

Making no headway in Arithmancy, going out of my mind with frustration! Normally I ask Chris S. for help when I have problems with this sort of thing but I have my pride. Just because she was probably right doesn't mean I have to be the first to apologize.

7, September, 4:26, Library,

I just don't understand this! Normally I'm good in my classes, I'm certainly not the best and I think all the teachers secretly hate me because I'm a smart ass but I've never found anything I just had no idea how to do. It's like the great wall is between me and this making sense land!

Ah fuck it, I'm just going to write down random stuff!

8, September, 4: 31, Dormitory,

Completely failed that assignment. Professor Nory is giving me another chance to do it properly. Thanks Professor, normally that would be the nice thing to do but normally the fault would have been my laziness. This time I just don't know how to do it!

In other news Chris F. is acting very strangely, he keeps making really lame excuses to leave for a few hours and he always comes back looking happier then before. Maybe he's developing a drug habit. Have decided to put some pamphlets under his pillow on all the hazards STDs and drugs.

9, September, 6: 13, Dormitory,

Just got out of Professor Nory's intensive tutorial. I am feeling stupider then I ever have in my whole life and the massive headache doesn't help either. Still don't fucking understand this shit even though Nor explained it five ways to Sunday.

I have always suspected that Professor Nory and I have different mind waves. The way he explains things generally just doesn't make sense to me which was Ok before when I had Chris S. to pick me up off my dumb ass. But now even he got frustrated with me and my stupid questions.

10, September, 3: 51, Arithmancy,

I know I failed that quiz. And now Nory has about two hours to explain to me just how wrong and stupid I am. Why does Chris S. have to be so god damn patient?

11, September, 11: 12, Dormitory,

James Potter found me in the library today after Nory's latest torture, tearing my hair out and trying to make sense of the notes and homework I had piled about me and we struck a bargain: he helps me pass Arithmancy and I help him win Lily over.

Not sure this is exactly the moral thing to do and this is probably going to kill all that good karma I got from not killing Rosie over the holidays. But on the other hand Lily seems fond of him so how wrong is it for me to help that blossom into love? And I am desperate.

12, September, 4: 31, Dormitory,

I think I am finally getting this Arithmancy shit. I even think I might have passed today quiz! It's all so exciting! I have also promised to devote Sunday (the day I am NOT spending with his best friend) giving James Lily-catching tips.

I feel so fucking popular.

13, September, 9: 11, Dormitory,

Going to Hogsmead with Sirius today on our "just friends" date. I'm still not sure why I am not in bed with the covers over my head, faking sick. I mean of all the times for my "Gryffindor courage" to kick in now has got to be the worst.

13, September, 8: 45, Dormitory,

I am in WAY over my head.

Sirius and I hooked up on the way out to the train from the Great Hall and while it was a little awkward at first (at least for me, he seemed unaffected) by the end of the short journey to the village we were talking and laughing like the oldest of friends. I had been to Hogsmead before (and in truth had gotten a little bored with it) but it was an entirely new experience with Sirius by my side.

He refreshed his supplies at Zonkos while I stood by laughing and trying to predict what he could possibly want with a gallon of hair-off solution, three packets of disappearing paper and biting teakettle. Afterwards we went to the Shrieking Shack where we had a very peculiar conversation.

Me: I wonder why the violent ghosts haven't attacked any of the villagers or people who come up here yet

Sirius (looking as if he was chewing off his tongue trying not to tell something): Yeah, funny that

Me: What do you know?

Sirius: Know? I know a lot of things but what I don't know which thing you're talking about.

Me: I'm disappointed in you Sirius, usually there's no lie in your eyes but today it's very conspicuous.

I am still very curious but there's a one in a million chance he'll ever tell me so I have decided to shove it to the back of my mind and move on to more productive things.

After the Shrieking Shack the pair of us stopped at the Three Broomsticks and got a few Butterbeers (he paid for mine despite my protestations, just friends indeed, that facade didn't last long) while we played the "would you rather" game.

Sirius had just decided he'd rather be a sneaker instead of a fancy dress shoe and it was his turn to ask the question when he threw me the curve ball. "Would you rather have your heart broken or never love at all?" He asked.

I took a sip of my butterbeer. He was a tricky one that Sirius Black. "This sounds terrible but I think I'd rather not love at all." I answered honestly. "Heart break just sucks."

He nodded. "Spoken like someone whose had their heart broken already."

I looked out the window. Like I was stupid enough to step into that. And when I looked back I had a smile and another question. "Would you rather date a girl who talked about her ex all the time or a girl who called you in the middle of the night to give you an emotional run-down of her day?"

He grimaced. "I guess the hyper emotional one."

That surprised me. I had always pegged Sirius as the kind of guy who didn't care what a girl talked about as long as she did it during her allotted time and slept with him afterwards. But perhaps it's just part of the character he's assumed to seduce me. Or maybe I'm just paranoid. That's the horrible thing about Sirius, he's so tricky and clever he might not even be tricky and clever.

You never know with him.

It was about one o'clock when we left the bar and went to Honeydukes where we each bought a bag full of the most rank things we could find and then went and sat on a picnic table outside to feed the contents to each other. I wouldn't eat the cockroach cluster but I did have a go at the blood pop and the whole handful of mayonnaise flavored Bertie Bot's.

Which would have all been fine except then Sirius popped the cockroach cluster in his mouth and that was when I threw up. I'm happy to report I made I made it to the bathroom of the little restaurant across the street but I am equally unhappy to report that the handicapped one was closest and so Sirius was able to stand in the doorway and try to console me (i.e. stifle his laughter).

"It was really quiet good." He told me as I splashed water on my face and wiped my mouth. "Just the right amount of crunchy and chocolaty."

I glared at him. "You are a very sick person." I informed him as I searched my pockets for the pack of super-charged minty gum I had bought earlier. "And I hope you die alone."

He smirked at me as I pushed past him back to the street. "You know you shouldn't be so scared to try new things." He lectured me as we resettled on the picnic table.

I glared at him. "I am not scared to try new things." I started but then I noticed he was smirking in that horribly infuriating way he does when he's having you on so I changed midway and it came out "I'm not scared... to kick your ass into next week."

After that we mostly wandered about and had a good time just talking, laughing and at some points even singing. I would have been sad to get back on the train back to school except that Sirius kept me laughing so hard I barely noticed.

We had almost an hour away before dinner would be served so we walked up to the common room together and standing at the base of the stairs to the boys and girls dormitories what where it happened. "I had a great time today." He told me with one of his dazzling smiles (que my stomach to begin flip-floping). "Maybe could we hang around together next Saturday?" He asked.

"I'd love to." I agreed smiling and trying not to freak out. "And I had a good time too."

Now I bet you think that's the end but not even close because just as I finished my sentence he leaned down and gave me a really soft kiss on the cheek. It wasn't exactly a declaration of love, in fact it would be hard to construe it as anything but platonic (you know the kind that Chris F. gives me all the time) but still! His lips were soft and warm and I got dizzy and EVERYTHING!

I stood at the bottom of the stairs in shock for a few moments before I came up here to write this.

Resolutions:

1) I will think less about You-Know-Who

2) I will be cool, suave and collected around You-Know-Who

3) I will be nicer to everyone (even Cousin Rosie)

4) I will not complain about Chris F.'s early morning torture sessions

5) I will try to make peace with Chris S. (you know without actually having to admit I'm probably wrong)

AN: Happy late Valentine's day to everyone! Now do me a big Valentine's favor and review, tell all your friends about the story, start a leaflet campaign at your school or community and raise money to buy an ad on your local radio station to tell everyone about the story. Or just review, that's cool too. And stay tuned for the next chapter in which...well you'll see won't you? PS. To answer to a few questions asked by reviewers this is set in the mid to late seventies and having matching socks just means your probably got your act together (unlike the rest of us slobs)