A/N: sorry its been so long since I updated or replied to reviews. There is simply not enough time in the world. But I do read the reviews and hopefully will reply to them next chappie. (I LURVS the reviews, no stoppie!)
Carolyn/Jenneva/Frodo/Sam walking towards the mountain of death, doom and destruction.
Carolyn was anxiously peering around, hoping to see Faramir. Instead she had spotted Gollum a few times. Ick. So she and Jenneva and Frodo and Sam hatched the devious plan to capture Gollum and use him as a guide. To prepare for the skirmish, Jenneva grabbed a big stick, and Carolyn fished a stun gun out of her pack. Jenneva looked at Carolyn oddly.
"Why do you have a stun gun?"
"Well, I thought it would be useful to have, in case a guy got a little too friendly, or if we had troubles with Boromir and the box, or in case we needed to stun Gollum"
Jenneva gave Carolyn one last odd look before going to sleep. An hour or two later, Jenneva could hear Gollum talking to himself. She started to shake with laughter. Unfortunately, this might have caused Gollum to run away, and that would have been bad. So Carolyn used her stun gun. Jenneva ceased to move, and Sam jumped up and grabbed Gollum. Carolyn aimed at Gollum and shot the stun gun. And hit Sam. Gollum looked at her, then sprung towards Frodo. Carolyn aimed again. And hit Frodo. Again, Gollum looked at her before grabbing for the ring. This time, Carolyn got Gollum right in the arse.
"W00t!"
And now Carolyn waited for everyone to wake up.
Merry/Pippin
"Lets go into the woods so we don't die."
"Okay."
Aragorn/Legolas/Gimli
"Hey, here come some riders. Lets hide then jump out from behind a rock and yell at them."
"Okay."
The riders passâ.
"Hey you guys! Riders ofâRohanâwhat news ofâtheâmark?" yelled Aragorn unceremoniously.
The riders circled around and surrounded Aragorn Legolas and Gimli.
"Who are you?" asked éomer.
"That's for me to know and you to find out," said Gimli, sticking out his tongue. (he had picked up a few things from Kelsey)
"I'd cut off your head if it stood but a little higher from the ground," growled a pissed off éomer.
"You would die before your stroke fell," said the o-so-sexy hot sexy hot elven prince.
The riders lowered their pointy sticks at the three offenders, and Aragorn tried to make peace.
"Please don't kill usâwe're looking for some of our friends. Two hobbits and an annoying human girl."
"Hey! I am not annoying! I'm justâopinionated, you jackass!"
"Well, we've found the girl. Have you seen the hobbits?"
Kelsey was not going to let her pride be wounded without a fight.
"They've gone into Fangorn forest, fun for you, because I'M NOT GOING WITH YOU!!!"
"Yes you are," said éomer, and pushed Kelsey towards her 'friends'.
"Good luck with the wench."
And with that, the riders of Rohan rode off across the plain, out of sight. Kelsey was extremely pissed off.
"I am NOT a wench, Damnit!!!!"
"Lets go, off to Fangorn forest, then."
So when they reached the battlefield, Kelsey took over. She was not going to let Aragorn look all impressive when she could instead.
"So here were Merry and Pippin. The crawled. There was an axe on the ground, they cut their ropes. They crawled. A horse almost killed one. He rolled away. The crawled towards the forest. They went into the forest. They're alive. The end."
Legolas and Gimli looked impressed, but Aragorn pouted and looked sulky. He was supposed to be the cool smart tracker guy who knows everything. Pout.
Kelsey smirked and headed towards the forest.
A/N: Poll-should I put new chapters into a new story called of babies, rings and insanity book 2 or something, so this one doesn't have a million chapters? Yay or nay