A/N: Nice reviews, please, and if you want to give a bad one, at least make it constructive. No insults, please. And if my characters are annoying, TOO BAD IT'S MY STORY. If you give a nice review stating so, I might change them a little. So yeah, this chappie is short. Next will be long, we promises XD. And thanks to the reviewers, I lurv you guys studiously ignores flaming bitch peas and lurv, enjoy.

Kelsey

Mwahahaha, I kissed him. HIM, the one elf, TO RULE THEM ALL. Okay, need to stop. That jokes getting a little old, dontchya think?

Great, now I'm talking to myself. I wonder if it's because I am a complete and total moron who sounds like an idiot and ate paint chips as a child?……Naw.

Jenneva/Carolyn/Gollum/Sam/Frodo/Faramir/Two other random guys

Carolyn's plan was going well. Faramir stayed close to her side. She had warned him that if he strayed too far, she would zap him with her stun gun. On the zapping mode, it just hurt like hell instead of knocking you out. So there he stayed, like a little puppy, following her wherever she went. And this suited her just fine. She was tempted to take away his pants again, but her eyebrows still hadn't grown back.

"Carolyn, where are we going again?"

Should she tell him they were wasting time until he fell in love with her so they could be taken back to Gondor and be completely safe?

"Massachusetts."

"Where's that?'

"I dunno. Jenneva, where's Massachusetts?"

Jenneva looked warily up from her task: fending off Gollum.

"Somewhere on the east coast, methinks-AHHH"

Gollum had managed to grab Jenneva around the waist and tried to carry her off. Carolyn zapped him as a side thought as she smiled sweetly at Faramir.

"See? There you go."

Frodo came to Jenneva's rescue, shoving the nearly unconscious Gollum off of her and helping her to her feet.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes, now that stalker…creature-thing is down. Thanks."

Sam came up and handed Jenneva a spoon.

"Next time he comes at you, hit him with this."

"Thanks, Sam…"

Gollum grabbed for Jenneva again, and she hit him with her spoon. Carolyn buzzed Gollum again, but this time the electricity went through the spoon into Jenneva. Spoons are conductors, you see. Her hair stood on end as she glared at Carolyn. Gollum apparently thought her hair was too sexy to resist. He started stroking it, making Jenneva's face go absolutely frozen. Frodo knocked him off the rock Gollum was perched on, assuming his protector role.

"Stay away from her, Sméagol. Master says so."

Gollum just looked at Frodo, then grinned as a plan formed in his strange twisted brain.