Thank you for all the nice comments... I am feeling better ((hugs))

My poor beta reader though was stuck in that Hurricane.

All is good now though

And I promise I won't let Ryan stink heeheehee

This one is for Eljay for all she does and for Harper Pixie ..cause she likes the O.C. too

sorry it's a bit of a short chappie

"I'm sorry," gushed Ryan. "I don't know why I did that. I'm sorry." Ryan leaned sideways in an attempt to reach the paper towel on hisbedside table. A strip of pain flared in his side he stifled his groan but he could feel his cheeks burning as the pain made the blood rush to his face.

Sandy reached for his shoulder pulling him back. "Shh, it's okay kid we got it. No big deal."

Kirsten stooped to pick up the cup as she wiped up at the water on the floor.

Ryan closed his eyes. She was a proper person, a good person. She shouldn't have to clean up after him. "I'm sorry," he repeated.

Sandy had his hand on Ryan's forehead again. "It's okay, just take deep breaths okay."

Ryan hadn't realized he was gasping. Now he could think of nothing else. "What's wrong?" he paused trying to get some air. He could feel the ends of his finger tips start to tingle. "This...is stupid and embar-rassing..." he managed to cough.

Sandy spoke to Kirsten ignoring what Ryan said. "He doesn't have a fever again, maybe we should call a nurse though."

"Sandy." Ryan choked out in attempted protest.

Seth was strangely silent throughout it all.

Sandy focused on him again. "Deep breaths."

Ryan gave up and tried to focus. He breaths came fast and shallow. Why couldn't he control them? Ryan hated being out of control.

A nurse came in then. But he didn't remember anyone actually calling her. Ryan tried to sit up. Maybe if he just got up he could calm his breathing down. There were too many eyes on him now. The aches and pains seized him as he tried to move. Could someone die from cramps? The room spun dizzily. There were voices everywhere, but none of them made sense. Then one seemed to break through the others; one made sense.

"Ryan, just listen to me. Lay down. Everything will be okay. There is no more water here. You can breath. Just try. Don't leave me here alone."

Ryan's breath hitched in his chest but slowly everything came in to focus. Ryan looked up. Seth was there gripping the side of the bed tightly while staring at him intently.

"Seth?" questioned Ryan confused.

"Yeah, it's cool."

Ryan looked away trying to see the other people in the room. The nurse put a mask over his face. Sandy and Kirsten looked like they had seen a ghost. He wanted to apologize but the doctor said something to him. It was distracting; he couldn't even remember the doctor coming in. The doctor injected something into his I.V. His armed burned for a moment and the world slid away.

Kirsten wiped stress tears from her cheeks and Seth's dad wrapped his arm around her shoulder. Seth forced himself to take a deep breath as visions of that day rapidly found their way into his thoughts. How could he tell his folks he knew what was wrong with Ryan. Seth had lost it when the lifeguards showed up and Ryan had disappeared. Ryan was his best friend. Hell, they were more then that now. They were brothers.

Seth couldn't imagine. He had been so scared he was going to be alone again and he wasn't even the one that was drowning. Seth had grown up in the water. Even before they moved to New Port he was always at the local pool. They vacationed on the ocean... Ryan never had. Ryan had been so out of his element here in New Port, the ocean was a foreign concept. So if Seth had been scared, Ryan had to be at least ten times more freaked out. The thing with Ryan is he gave nothing away. Seth doubted Ryan even admitted his fears to himself. Ryan was all about gut reaction. It's a big part of what Seth admired about Ryan. It was also why Ryan could some times be dangerous...to others and himself.

Seth didn't mean to flinch when his dad hand touched his shoulder. "You okay? You did a great thing there."

Seth shook himself physically and mentally. "Um, yeah Dad, just peachy. Is he going to be okay?"

Everyone looked up at the doctor then who seemed to be studying Ryan's charts. The Doctor smiled at them. "He is improving physically."

"But," Kirsten interjected. "He can't breath; how can that be better? He can't keep going on like this."

"Ryan has no history of Asthma, I believe what we just witnessed was a panic attack."

Sandy stared at the doctor. "A panic attack? Our Ryan? I mean Ryan is very ... well, he's not known for showing a lot of emotion."

Seth looked at his father. His dad was having the same thoughts he was. Ryan was always in control. But, in a way it made sense. Ryan was one of two things. Cool and controlled or explosive.

"It's not unusual," Doctor Casper continued. "Both your boys have been through something very traumatic. It would probably be good if they could talk about it with some one. I could arrange..."

"No," muttered Ryan from his bed. He had been a sleep only moments before. He was barely conscious and yet he was still protesting. "No shrinks!"

"I second that! Totally!"

"Seth! Ryan..." Sandy started.

Ryan moaned, "No... Mmm pizza."

Seth couldn't stop the smirk. "I think we've officially lost him Dad."

Kirsten sighed loudly and both of the Cohen men flinched visibly. That sigh meant only one thing. Kirsten had had enough. "Thank you doctor. My family and I will discuss our options."

"Oh, oh," whispered Sandy to Seth. Seth's grin grew despite himself. He raised his hand to cover his mouth in a vain attempt to hide his mirth.

The doctor nodded and smiled again before making a quick exit.

"All right that's quite enough Seth Cohen! Don't think I didn't see that grin! I don't think any of us are in any shape to make any decisions at the moment. Let's give Ryan a break and go down to the cafeteria and have some supper."

Seth stomach growled in agreement.

The three Cohens sat around an old table in an even older hospital cafeteria. The florescent lights flickered overhead annoyingly.

Seth picked at a plate of cold fries as his parents discussed some of Ryan's paperwork for the hospital.

Sandy placed one of Ryan's old files from social services on the table in front of Seth's fries. Seth let his eyes wander over to it. He was bored out of his skull and actually his ribs were starting to ache again. He really just wanted to take a nap. He needed to talk to Ryan once more before he headed home though. He wanted to tell Ryan he understood about the water; he wanted to tell Ryan.... Seth's brains finally caught up with his eyes.

The name on the file read:

Ryan James Atwood.

D.O.B. 06/06/1988

Seth's grin grew and grew. Ryan was younger then him! Ryan was his little brother! Seth's birthday was January 15th. Oh, Ryan was never going to live this down.

Sandy poked him in the shoulder. "What's up with you?"

"Huh, what?" Seth feigned innocence and tucked his new found information away in the back of his mind for future use."

Sandy looked at his son seriously. "How are you dealing—you know, I don't even know if I've asked you that question. We've been so busy with Ryan being hurt and then the fever..."

Seth raised his hand in protest. "Dad, take a breath, I'm fine."

It was then Kirsten joined in. "Last night you fell asleep on the couch. You seemed to be having a nightmare but you woke yourself up. I forgot about it until now. I can't remember you having a nightmare since you were little."

"I didn't need them until Ryan joined the clan, my life was a nightmare."

"Seth," replied Kirsten sternly.

"Okay, yeah, fine... there have been a few nightmares since the accident. But, you guys have no idea how scary it was. I mean the accident; it was like they say it is on TV. Everything went slow-mo and there was nothing I could do. I can still see that boat barreling down on us. Then Ryan, he was always the strong one but he looked so afraid. I've never seen him look like that before. But, the worst part was when he just disappeared. One moment he was there, then he was just gone. He was so quiet I... he didn't say anything he was just gone."

He hadn't realized he was crying until his Mom reached over and gripped his hand. "Seth, I really think maybe you and Ryan should talk to someone."

Seth wiped hastily and his face with his free hand. "Mom, I don't want people to think I'm some sort of whack-job."

"Seth," Sandy cut in. "No one needs to know... it will stay just between us."

Kirsten smiled tenderly. "You've been through a hugely traumatic event. Like the doctor said, it's normal for you to feel stressed. Ryan and you both need to talk to someone who knows how to handle the types of emotions you and he must be feeling. It's nothing to be ashamed about. Besides, we'd love you even if you were a whack-job."

Seth sniffed and smiled despite himself at his Mother's lame attempt at a joke. "Mom, don't say whack-job." Then he sighed. "Fine, whatever you guys think is best. I'll talk to someone. But, I'm not going to be the one who's going to tell Ryan that he has to get all touchy-feely with some stranger."

TBC.