Disclaimer—See Chapter One

A/N: Thank you all so much! Your feedback is amazing, and I can't thank you enough! Thank you Quadrantje, Melodie, MariShal, CatJerica, Mayra, Blackpanther, Fiery Feral, Rain, Jessica, Lauren13, Mfkngst! I am so happy you are sticking with the series and enjoying it still. I hope you continue to enjoy it! I realized as I was uploading that I posted my first story one year ago today! :) I can't believe it's been a year and 181,465 words later already! (That's what my profile says at least, lol!) Thank you again so much!

All Things—Chapter Five

The sound of savage punching gave Brennan his first clue as to where Shalimar was located; the sound of angry grunts told him her mood hadn't changed. He sighed, following the aggressive sounds to the weight room. It wasn't as beautiful as their original dojo had been, but it was more practical for the team, hence the move a few years ago to a lower level room. He rounded the corner, wincing at the powerful hiss of air as her fist made direct contact with the punching bag. He leaned against the doorframe, crossing his arms. He knew she immediately sensed his presence, it was evident in the tensing of her shoulders, but she gave no other indication of it, and he waited, silent for several minutes, watching. She had obviously been at it for a while. Even though the room was kept at a lower temperature than the rest of Sanctuary, sweat ran in rivulets down her back, plastering her cotton shirt to her small frame. She had piled her long hair on top of her head, and the mass of curls tilted precariously with every vicious jab. She rarely put her hair up, and seeing the long, creamy expanse of neck gave him pause. She smirked slightly, somehow knowing his exact thoughts, and he dragged his eyes back to her face. The smile flitted away, replaced by a scowl as she threw another punch. He had the sudden feeling that it was his face she was seeing as she planted her fist squarely in the center of the protesting bag.

"Shal." He finally spoke, pushing himself off the doorframe.

She ignored him, fists continuing their rapid pummel.

"Shalimar, please."

Her eyes darkened slightly, but she made no move to stop. Brennan groaned, walking over to the wildly swinging bag and holding it still as he stood behind it, letting her continue her rant. Several minutes passed before he tried again.

"Come on, Shal." Talk to me."

She paused to glance up at him, blowing a damp strand of hair out of her eyes before punching again. Impatient, he reached out to grab her arm, but she only pushed him away.

He stumbled back, catching himself after a few steps, staring at her in frustration. She didn't even spare him a glance, continuing to take out her aggression on the punching bag. His own anger pushed to the surface, and he stomped back over to her, arms outstretched.

"Is that what you want? You want to hit me? Then go ahead." He stopped alongside the punching bag, brows raised.

"Stop it, Brennan." She spoke finally, voice low.

"Stop what? Stop caring? I can't do that, Shal."

Her hands dropped to her side, chest heaving as beads of sweat ran heavy down her temple. "Stop patronizing me." She swiped a hand across her face, catching the dripping sweat. "I saw your face in the lab."

"What?" His hands flung out again in confusion.

"You didn't believe me, you and Jesse both."

He took a stop toward her. "Shal—"

"I said don't!" She took a step back. "Do you have any idea how much you hurt me?"

He tried again to edge closer. "Don't you know by now, I would sooner die than cause you more pain?"

"Then why won't you believe me?" Her voice cracked, and his heart constricted.

"I want to believe, Shal. I want us to figure this thing out together."

"Lexa lied to us."

He raised one palm up in question. "She's always kept her Dominion secrets from us, it's part of who she is," He tried to lighten the mood. "Complexa, remember?"

She didn't smile, and he winced as his joke fell flat.

"The footprints," She suddenly looked up. "The footprints will show you—"

"No, Shal." He shook his head, pain showing in his eyes. "I looked. There—there's no other footprints."

She stared at him in silent disbelief. No footprints? She raised a hand, bracing it against her forehead in confusion. "But I saw them. They were there, Brennan."

He shrugged helplessly, unsure what to say.

"I didn't imagine them. There were there. Someone was there, outside." She whimpered, shaking her head. "I'm not crazy here, Brennan. I can't explain it, but I sawthem, I saw Lexa. You have to believe me."

"I didn't see anything, Shalimar." His voice was gentle as he took another step closer to her.

"No!" She held both hands out in front of her in a gesture of denial, "I saw them."

It was then he finally noticed her hands. They were taped, but the abuse they had taken had ripped through, and blood soaked the tape, skin showing angry and inflamed.

"Oh Shal." His heart broke.

Her eyes lowered, and she started, staring at her hands in confusion, as if seeing them for the first time. "What?" Tears welled in her eyes. "What's happening to me, Brennan?"

He reached over, closing the rest of the distance between them, pulling her into his arms. She struggled for a moment, fists pounding on his chest in fear and frustration, but he stood still, holding her. Finally, slowly, she stopped resisting, sagging into him, arms crossed in front of herself protectively, shuddering as she refused her tears. She could not be weak, not now. She dropped her head, stiffening in his embrace.

"Shal?" He pulled back slightly, dunking his head to meet her eyes.

She resisted his gaze. "I'm fine, Brennan."

He looked at her a moment more, then reached out and tipped her chin up. Love spoke where words failed and their connection flared, recognizing the hope and the pain in each other's eyes. Tears spilled down her cheeks in silent rivers, and suddenly, before he even realized it, he was holding her again, and her arms were holding him back.

It had been hours, and he still hadn't left the relative safety of the lab. He felt foolish for thinking that elsewhere in Sanctuary wouldn't be as safe, but he knew that as long as he stayed put, he was safe from Shalimar. Shalimar. He shook his head, still not quite sure what had happened. He regretted now losing his temper. Something was wrong around here, and it was his responsibility to fix it. It always was.

He groaned and rubbed his tired eyes, feeling the affects of the strain he forced upon them from hours of computer work. Nothing. Endless files of research and medical documents and nothing to indicate anything about mood swings in ferals. Shalimar was in perfect health. If there was anything wrong with her, it was beyond his ability to find it. Not good enough. He swore, shoving his chair back and pounding the table in frustration. It was up to him to find the answer. It was always up to him.

"Jesse?"

He glanced up sharply to see Lexa standing in the hallway, head poking in. He hadn't even heard her enter. He hadn't really seen her all day, he realized as she walked in the room. His eyes automatically monitored her as she crossed toward him, gauging her strength. She had been sick a few weeks ago, and he still worried about her. She worked too much. So did he. He frowned at the thought.

She quirked an eyebrow at his expression. "Bad day?"

He huffed sarcastically. "You could say that."

She walked the rest of the way up to him as he sank back into his chair, hands framing his face, brushing his hair back off his temple and then lifting his gaze up to hers.

"Tell me."

"You didn't hear it?"

She shrugged. "I was...out."

His lips pressed together at her cryptic response. "Well, you missed a big fight."

"Brennan and Shalimar?"

He blew out his breath. "Brennan, Shalimar, and me."

"Hmm, probably a good thing I wasn't here then." She smiled ruefully. "It might have been much worse."

His lips tilted upward in a small smile, searching her eyes as her hands stroked his cheeks in comfort. She stared back at him, and he saw nothing but warmth and familiarity looking back. He smiled at her, standing up and twisting his fingers around Lexa's, leading her out of the lab and into his bedroom. He groaned as he sank onto the edge of his bed, wrapping his arms around her waist as she stepped between his legs and pulled her close, resting his head against her chest. He could hear her heartbeat, and it was slow and steady. Shalimar was just wrong. His eyes fell shut as her head bent down over his, lips pressing into his brow, hair cascading down over them both in a dark shimmer and cutting off the light.

It was getting late, but Brennan didn't notice, so intent was he on the woman in his arms. He knew she hated to cry; she seemed to equate it with a sign of weakness. But to him, her tears were a welcome relief; it meant he had broken through her walls. It scared him to think that one day he might not be able to. His arms tightened imperceptibly. They had been through much together, relied on each other for strength and for hope, but she was still afraid to show weakness. Sometimes he wondered if it was part of her feral nature. In the wild, a wounded animal went into hiding to avoid becoming prey; she seemed to share the same instinct.

Her grip had grown lax, hands still clutching fistfuls of his shirt, but with less desperation. She could hang onto him forever if she wanted, he didn't care.

Too soon, she pulled away, hand starting to rise to his face, but stopping in chagrin as she remembered the blood. Her eyes darted to his shirt, wincing.
"Sorry."

He didn't even glance down, holding her with his eyes. "It's not important."

"But your shirt--"

"Shalimar."

The feel of his gentle hand sliding around her jaw and cupping the back of her neck cut her off. She trembled as his fingers found a stray curl and wrapped around it, brushing softly against the nape of her neck.

"Are we ok?" He finally spoke, anguish just beneath the surface of his voice.

Her heart slammed in her throat, ashamed at her anger. "Yeah."

"We'll figure this out Shal, I promise."

Somehow, in that moment, she believed him, pushing up on her toes and pressing a kiss against his mouth. He kept it light, resisting when she tried to deepen it, gentling the motion with feather soft kisses on her cheeks, her brow, and finally again on her lips.

She kept her hands at her sides, and he reached down, drawing them into his own hands and raising them up, kissing the bruised knuckles. She smiled tumultuously up at him, head shaking slightly.

"I love you, Brennan."

"I know." One corner of his mouth lifted in a teasing grin. He pressed another kiss to her hands before leading her over to a chair. "Sit." He prompted softly, kneeling in front of her as she sank into the chair, carefully unwrapping the damaged tape from her hands. She winced a few times, but was quiet otherwise, and the silence rose between them, thick and warm. Finally he finished, relieved to see her recovering hand hadn't suffered serious damage and that the tape had caught the blood. Other than some nasty scrapes, they were fine.

"I need to talk to Jesse." He glanced up as she spoke, seeing her face twist with regret and another emotion he couldn't quite read.

"Yeah," He gently agreed. "But I think he'll understand if you wait until tomorrow. It's late, and we're all exhausted."

She sighed and nodded. "I shouldn't have gotten so angry at him."

Brennan worried his upper lip between his teeth, debating his next words.

"You want to know why I got so upset?" Shalimar asked for him. "I don't know, Brennan. I had this headache, and I just felt so frustrated. I am so tired of all the secrets and lies from the Dominion, from Lexa sometimes, from our last few missions, I don't know..." She shook her head, at a loss. "I just can't take it sometimes, you know?"

"Yeah, I know." He sighed heavily, wrapping an arm around her waist as he leaned forward, resting his head in her lap. Her hands landed in his hair, its spiky fineness tickling her palms. "I just need you to talk to me, Shal. Don't leave me out of this."

Her fingers tightened in his hair as he waited, holding his breath.

"Alright."

His breath blew out of him at her whispered words, and he lifted his head, catching her hands as they slid down to frame his face.

"That's all I need."

They stared at each other for a moment. His eyes flickered and darkened, and she gasped softly, leaning forward and meeting his searching lips. He didn't hold back this time, and they kissed for long moments, comforting and reassuring with touches so gentle they brought an ache to her throat.

The sound of Chester's paws clicking on the floor as she wandered into the weight room and whined for attention finally drew them apart. Shalimar bent over, picking up the little dog and holding her to her chest as they walked toward the bedrooms.

"Your room or mine?" Brennan teased softly in her ear as they neared their rooms.

"Yours." She smiled up at him, fingers stroking Chester's silky ear as the dog rested her head on her shoulder in contentment. Brennan dropped a kiss on her head before moving ahead of her and pushing his door open, holding it for her. She dunked under his arm, thinking back on the past few days. She wasn't sure when all the unease and tension had started, but she felt relieved knowing Brennan was by her side. Why had she even doubted him for a second? Her fingers stilled, tangling in Chester's fur. Cole. It had started with Cole. She turned towards Brennan as his fingers brushed lightly against her lower back, steering them further into the room.

"Brennan?"

"Hmm?" He stepped past her on his way into the bathroom.

"What did Cole mean by 'more tail'?" She set Chester down on the bed and rummaged through a drawer for a t-shirt to sleep in.

It was quiet for a beat.

Brennan's head popped out from behind the partially open bathroom door. He looked conflicted.

Her stomach fluttered, and she searched his eyes, desperate for the connection.

But he disappeared back into the bathroom, voice casual as he answered her above the running water. "When we used to be tight, he'd always give me a hard time about, well—all the girls I was with."

Humph. She frowned. She knew Brennan had always had a rather active social life, but she didn't like to think about it. "That's it?"

"Uh, yeah. That's about it."

He was brushing his teeth, but even through his mumbling, she knew he wasn't telling her something. Her headache was once again coming back, and a quiver of fear licked up like a flame. Without warning, she had the overwhelming sense of a shadow above her head, and she fought the urge to cower, fingers clutched into her lap, watching Brennan under lowered lashes as he came back out and settled into the bed.

"You ok?" He noticed her closed expression, afraid she was shutting him out again.

"Yeah." She spoke after a moment, laying down and turning onto her side. "I'm fine."

For the first time since they had been together, both Brennan and Shalimar were worried when they went to bed, and both lay awake, lost in their own contemplation and doubts. Shalimar stewed for what seemed like hours, mind racing. Brennan. Jesse. Lexa. She didn't know what to think, what to believe. Her head throbbed dully. Finally, she began to drift off to sleep, body relaxing, her mind letting go of the niggling fears. No matter what is going on, I trust Brennan. I'll trust him forever...

Brennan sensed she had fallen asleep, so he turned and propped his head up on his hand to watch her. Gently he pushed a curl from her face. He felt an overwhelming need to protect, to guard this woman who tried to seem so fierce and independent, but was truly fragile, as all life was fragile. He fought the sleep coming over him, not wanting to surrender the intensity of emotion that coursed through him as he drew her into his arms, and she curled unconsciously against him in her sleep. Love, unlooked for and utterly beyond his understanding, had a grip on his heart that pained him. Maybe if he'd learned it as a child, known it for years as others did, maybe then it would not be so terrifying. He would believe her. He had to. He closed his eyes and buried them in her hair, tucking her chin into his chest as she curled even closer. His breathing matched hers, and he knew what it was to be one.

In the stillness of the night, she arose, easing out of bed, freezing for a moment as the figure next to her stirred and mumbled. She held her breath as he turned, hand landing on her pillow and settling back into sleep. She ran her eyes along his body, caressing the outline of his arm as it curled where she had just been. After a moment, she turned, tiptoeing across the darkened room and stealing through the door, careful not to let the light from the hallway fall across his eyes. She paused in the hallway, eyes darting both ways and then slipping around the corner. In the garage, she picked her way through the darkened room, finding one of the guy's boots that were too large for her feet, but tugging them on anyway. She was still in her nightgown, not willing to take the risk of changing and being caught, so she chose a long, thick coat that fell past her calves, pulling the hood over her head and tucking her hair inside. She took one last look around before pulling open the outside door. She shivered, staring up into the cloudy, starless sky before taking a deep breath and disappearing into the swirling darkness.

He wouldn't like it if she were late.