"Severus?" She asked, pushing the warm comforter off of her and padding towards him, his white blouse hanging down around her knees.
"Please, don't come any closer." he said and she stopped, a little confused. Maybe he was angry she had raided his closet. She pulled the shirt closer around her.
"Is everything okay?" she asked.
"You are exquisite just how you are, just like that." he said. She smiled and gathered her hair up in her hands.
"It's a bit long, really." she said and tied it into a knot. "I should..."
"Yes." he said. "And no. You should go, but no one knows you're back." He closed his eyes and shook his head. "We're not doing a very good job of this, are we?"
"Well, here I am in your shirt in your bedroom. I guess it depends on what your definition of 'good job' is." she said, smirking. "But I am going to go." she said. She turned around and gathered her clothes, pulling on her jeans and her robes right over the shirt. He made an audible gulping noise but she just left without another word. She stopped at the girl's lavatory just outside the potions classrooms and dressed properly.
Back in her tower, she took the hidden shirt out of her robes. She pressed her face in it and took a deep breath. It smelled like him and her combined – a scent she thought she could get used to. Her own bed, in comparison, looked small and cold. She knew leaving his chambers was the right choice. The tension in there was palpable. She loved him, she was sure, and she wanted him, but she just wasn't willing to risk losing Hogwarts for either of them.
Sighing, she gathered her homework and study materials and sat alone by the fire in her common room. When it was time for dinner, she went down, making her presence known. McGonagall was there but Dumbledore wasn't and neither was snape though she didn't expect him to show. He wasn't that social.
She ate alone at the end of the table. There were only about fifteen students there and most were Hufflepuffs. There were three other young Gryffindors. She could feel McGonagall watching her, probably wondering why she was back before Harry and Ron. She left soon after. Ginny didn't realize how dull school could be at the holidays. All she wanted to do was to go back to the dungeons but knew better. She decided to put on her winter things and go for a walk around the grounds – perhaps see if Hagrid was in his hut. The ground was covered with snow and it crunched icily under her feet. She walked along the edge of the lake for a while, and peered down at Hagrid's hut but it was dark and there was no smoke coming from the chimney. She was starting to shiver – the cold had done a good job of cooling her heated skin. She headed for the castle, the darkness taking over the landscape.
Inside, she walked to the kitchens to see if she could get a cup of hot chocolate. Apparently, she wasn't the only one.
"Ah, Miss Weasley." Dumbledore greeted.
"Hullo, headmaster." she said, shyly. "I didn't see you at dinner."
"No, I just got back and the elves are being so kind as to fix me a little something. Would you like anything?" he asked.
"Hot cocoa, if it isn't too much of a bother." Ginny said and two elves came scurrying out with a tray of food for Dumbledore and a mug for Ginny. She took the mug.
"Just have that sent to my office." he told the elf kindly and he vanished before their eyes. "Why don't you join me." he said, and she almost choked on the hot liquid. This was it. He knew. He knew everything and she knew she was completely in the wrong and she didn't think she could lie to such a kind, old wizard. She started to panic. "Ginny, it's okay." he said and led her towards the Gargoyle. In his office, she sat in the chair opposite his desk, still feeling dizzy. She had started to hyperventilate in anticipation of what the Headmaster was going to ask her.
"I'm sorry." she said.
"Whatever for?" he asked, eating a sliced up apple drizzled in caramel.
"For acting the way that I did by the kitchens. For, for being good at potions and agreeing to teach that class." she said. "I know that you've heard the rumors but I beg you, please don't fire him or expel me, please." she said and she could feel hot tears running down her cheeks.
"Do you think anyone's behavior warrants a dismissal?" he asked, seriously. She shook her head.
"No, of course not. He's done nothing wrong. He had been kind and given me an opportunity to teach." she smiled. "You must know that the students don't particularly like him."
"So I've gathered." Dumbledore said. "I've known Severus Snape a long time and while some say he lacks that certain bedside manner, he is most talented." Dumbledore said. Ginny blushed, thinking of Snape's bedside. She'd never heard of another student seeing a professor's chambers. She guessed that his were away from where most of the Professors lived, that he created the space in the dungeons for himself.
"I feel like I've known him a long time. He is not the type to – connect easily with others and so when he does I think it's really important that he not lose that." she said, trying to articulate herself clearly. He nodded in agreement.
"You seem to be at an impasse then, Miss Weasley." Dumbledore said. "You want your friendship with a professor to stay strong yet you are worried that it is inappropriate for a student to befriend a professor at all."
"Something like that." she murmured. "I need some options." she said.
"Yes, you do." he stroked his beard thoughtfully. "Why don't I think about it, for awhile and see what I can come up with." he offered. She nodded, grateful for his kindness and delicate handling of the situation. He was not angry nor did he jump to any rash conclusions. "Ginny, I know what lovesick teenage girls look like. I hired Gilderoy Lockhart myself, you may remember, and I would not help one of those girls in the way that I'm helping you, do you understand?" he asked.
"You see the difference, then?" she asked.
"I've seen all of the Weasley children pass through this school." he said. "I saw the difference the first day you stepped foot inside." he said. "Not to speak poorly of your brothers, but you, my dear, you are the diamond in the rough, so to speak." She smiled at him, her eyes teary.
"Thank you." she said. His eyes twinkled with wisdom.
"You are, as always, most welcome." Some time had passed and Ginny felt tired after confessing so much to the headmaster. She wasn't, sleepy, however and didn't feel like being alone in her dormitory. She wished Hermione or somebody was there. She wished for a girl friend that she could confide in. She decided to go to the library and try to find something light and humorous to read. She pushed open the heavy doors and peered into the poorly lit library. It was deserted and so she wandered along the stacks, trailing her finger along the bindings of books, looking for something interesting. She heard the library doors open and walked back towards the entrance to see who was coming in. Her heart skipped a beat.
"Hello." She said.
"Hello." Snape replied. They stared at each other. "This is silly." he said.
"I agree." she said. "I'm trying to find something to entertain myself when all I really want to do is go see you." she said.
"I'm brewing, preparation for this term. Just basic stuff, really, but things I'll need in bulk. I really could use someone who knows what they are doing, if you'd like to help." he said.
"Sure." she said and he quickly got the book he came for and she followed him out of the library. "I spoke with Professor Dumbledore today." she said carefully, wondering if she should just keep the conversation to herself. She didn't like keeping things from him, though. She felt like telling him everything, especially things which involved him.
"I thought he would have returned by now." Snape said, neutrally.
"He called me a diamond in the rough." she said. "He offered to help me."
"Help you do what?" he asked.
"I'm not really sure. Help me to love you and not lose Hogwarts all at the same time." she said. "I didn't meant to tell him anything but he already knew."
"He has always been insufferably knowledgeable about the most private of affairs." Snape said. He opened the classroom door and let her walk in first. She perched on the edge of his desk and he stood in front of her. "Did you really mean that?" Snape asked, as an after thought.
"Mean what?" Ginny asked.
"That you love me?" he said. He did not look like a grown man or respected professor but the young student who had been hurt all those years ago.
"I'm afraid so." she said, in almost a whisper. "I tried not to, I did, but I can't seem to help it. It just keeps spilling out of me. You're all I want, Severus, and I can't have you now, at least for a year and a half, and I'm afraid I won't ever be able to have you." she said. He reached out and put his hands on her cheeks which were warm under his cool skin.
"I've never loved anyone before now." he admitted. Ginny smiled, relieved to hear him say it too. "I've lived at Hogwarts for a long time, Virginia. A long time." he said.
"What are you saying?" She asked.
"I do have a life outside of this school. I needn't stay her forever." he said. "I could leave. We could be together." She couldn't believe he was offering this to her. "I could work full-time for the ministry or not work at all, it doesn't matter." she felt overwhelmed at what he was willing to give her. This was no longer secret looks or stolen kisses. This was a real relationship, a real life. She tilted her head up and brought her lips to his. A gentle kiss.
"We'll have to think about this." she said. He nodded, respecting her levelheadedness when he himself just wanted to grab her hand and head for the hills. And then she did something to him that hadn't happened in as long as he could remember. She pulled him close and put her arms around him. She hugged him, laying her cheek against his chest. He hugged her back. She smelled like flowers in the spring time, like life itself. She didn't let go for a long time.