Summery: Different take on life in Tree Hill. Peyton is a 16 year old in love with a guy who will never be good enough for her in the eyes of her father. Lucas has done a lot of bad things, living the life of a thug but is trying to change for love. Leyton all the way.

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters from One Tree Hill, just the situations they are in

Chapter 7: Peyton's POV

It's been over a week since the 'incident' and I just can't bring myself to see him, it just hurts. He promised me he'd change and then he goes out and gets himself hurt. I'm tired of worrying about him, I can't do this anymore. I handled it before and then he changed, that was the best part of our relationship, knowing he could change for me. I guess he lied because if he had meant it I wouldn't have cried over him. I've cried too many times for him.

I've tried to avoid anything that is connected with him over this past week, even Haley. I know that's wrong, she didn't make the mistake, he did. That's not the point. I just need time to clear my head, rethink everything. I love him so much but there's only so much my heart can take. I wish he'd just change, I thought I could help him do that but I guess what he feels for me isn't strong enough to make him do that. These past 6 months have been great, no need to worry. Of course my dad didn't see it that way, he just told me 'once a criminal, always a criminal'. I didn't want to believe him but maybe he was right. Maybe I'm just not supposed to be happy. Maybe if I just don't see him I will be. Right now I just don't know anymore.

I've spent the last week pretending to be happy with Brooke and the rest of the time at home, either crying or sketching. I'm all cried out now, I have nothing left. My dad knows something happened, he can tell I'm unhappy but at the same time I think he's happy that I'm not spending any time with Lucas. He probably thinks that what he has been telling me these past few months has finally sunk in. I guess in a way it has, but it's deeper than that. I just don't want to hurt anymore.

I hear the door open and close, dad's home. I don't want to be alone, I need to talk to someone and so I just decide to go downstairs and see him. 'Hi honey, you ok?' I know I'm not and deep down I'm pretty sure he knows that too but still I put on my best 'happy face' and tell him I'm fine. 'So I was thinking, we haven't really had chance to just hang out in a while, so how about it?' I smile at him; maybe it's the best thing for me, to spend time with someone who loves me. 'Sure dad, sounds good.'

He decides to take me down to the dock; we used to do this when I was just a kid. After my mom died we'd come down here when he was home just to get away from everything. Back then all we had was each other, and Brooke. He knows something is wrong, otherwise he wouldn't have brought me here but that's what I love about him. He knows me well, he knows exactly what I need and I respect that.

Larry: So are you going to tell me what has been getting at you lately or are you just going to keep pretending to smile.

Peyton: Daddy I just don't know, when did life get so complicated?

Larry (Laughing slightly): I guess it was when you entered the teenage years for me, but seriously, honey being a teenager is always complicated but I'm always here for you if you need to just talk.

Peyton: Some things I want to talk about I know that you wouldn't give clear advice

Larry: So I guess this is about Lucas then. Peyt I may not always agree with the choices you make but I can at least be fatherly enough to try

Peyton (smiling slightly): Well umm he promised he'd change for me, which he did but then the other night he made a mistake and I dunno, it just hurt I guess. I know he's sorry and I know he means it but sometimes sorry just loses meaning

Larry: Peyton, I knew he must have done something because you weren't happy. I'm trying to be understanding but it's hard for a father when someone hurts his little girl

Peyton: I know that and I understand that. I don't know if you'll have to worry about it anymore because right now I'm so confused I don't know what I want anymore.

Larry: As happy I'd be about you being without someone like that I have to go against my own thoughts and just tell you to ask yourself, do you love him enough to forgive him. If you do then maybe it's worth a try.

Peyton: And you'd be alright with that?

Larry: Peyt I want you to be happy and if this boy makes you happy then I may just have to try to learn to accept that.

Peyton stood up and hugged her father but now she was even more confused than before. She used to have an excuse to be away from him, now was she actually allowed to see him? Either way she knew it would be baby steps for her father if she was to forgive Lucas. She didn't know either way. Yes she loved him, yes she wanted to be with him and in many ways she needs him but was all the enough. Especially if he was going to return to his old way of life. Maybe this was best for them; maybe if they weren't together he'd change for the better. Maybe if she just avoided him for a while, he'd see the error of his ways and change. If she went back right now would he promise to change? Would he mean it? She just didn't know, any choice she made would cause her pain. More than anything would be losing him for good. That was her biggest fear, he sometimes thinks he's unbreakable but at the end of the day he's human like the rest of us, one more mistake like that and he could be gone for good. She didn't want to be going to visit him at a graveside, she already has to do that with one person she loves, she couldn't handle if she had to do the same with Lucas.

Peyton was so confused, is love really worth all of this pain? Is it worth all of the confusion? Most of the time she figured it is, because when he holds her everything stops and all of her fears go away. She's just a young girl, a young girl in love with the kind of guy no father would want for his daughter. She had to make him change, that would be the only way they could truly be together for good, although she would probably find herself standing by him if he didn't anyway. She just wants a normal life, a normal boyfriend, is that too much to ask?