This song is written by a Christian Band by the name of "Ninth Hour". They rock and are wonderful musicians...I hope you like it. Enjoy the chapter. As always, I am not making any money off of this..I wish, and I do not own Third Watch....please don't sue...I have no money.
Dry Bones
I've seen that you've been achin'
And all I want to do is reach out with my arms
and tenderly speak to you
High above is where I'll always be
It's where I've been, it's not your perspective
So wait for me to lead you with your eyes wide closed
Come alive as I breathe into your dried-up bones
As I breathe into your dried-up bones
At night while you've been sleeping
I sat beside your bed and reached out with my hand
and silently prayed for you
By your side is where I'll always be
It's where I've been to see your perspective
So wait for me to lead you when the night is long
Close your eyes as I lead you by the darkest moon
As I lead you by the darkest moon.
A Little Piece of Heaven - Chapter 43
I woke up early the next morning to the sound of the door bell ringing loudly. As I rolled over in bed and looked at Bosco I didn't have the heart to wake him, so I silently got out of bed and put on my pink bathrobe then shut the door behind me.
He had fretted and cried out in his sleep again, calling for her and cursing him. I never told him the next day after he had woken, for I felt that it might be intruding into some dark thoughts that he wanted left unsaid. I was beginning to feel that he might never open up to me and let me in to that part of himself that only I knew existed and it made me worry. He was never one to let just anyone know how he felt, but with me it had always been different. With me he could let down his guard and this time, he wasn't letting anyone in.
I could see through the small window in the door that it was Bosco's dad, Anthony. I hadn't had the misfortune to meet him more than once, and the time that I did it was when he came to the station to rat out his own son. I hadn't had a good feeling about him from the things that Bosco had told me over the years, and I especially didn't like him after what happened to Mikey. Imagine, turning in your own son just for a buck. After last night, I really didn't want to see him, but I knew it better that I dealt with Anthony instead of Bosco.
I opened the latch on the door and swung it wide. He stood about six foot one, with short graying hair. He had dark eyes that had no doubt seen a thousand drunks, combined with a long nose and curled up lips from which he smirked. He was probably about 170-180 pounds, maybe 165 on a good day, but for the most part, he was nothing sensational.
Maybe it was the way he looked at me that made my stomach turn. His eyes starting in at my head and sweeping slowly down over my body and back up again. I had seen that look before and I didn't like it. It made me self-conscious to have his eyes linger on me, especially after all of the stories I'd heard about his sordid past. I looked him in the eye and pulled the belt on my robe tighter.
There were so many things I wanted to say to him; so many ugly words, so many accusations that all would have been true. I had to remind myself that he was here to see Rose. This was, essentially, her dying request. It made no sense to me that he was the person she wanted so desperately, and even though I didn't understand her reasons I knew that letting him was the right thing to do.
"Hi Mr. Boscorelli. Come in." I said as courteously as I could.
"Hi. Faith, right? Aren't you Maurice's partner?" He asked raising an eyebrow suggestively. He grinned broadly in what, I was sure he thought, was an appealing way.
"Yes. But I'm also his fiancee." I said, a little taken back by the way he was acting.
"Fiancee? Well, it looks like he got some brains in his head, for once, and picked up some of his father's charm. A cute little broad like you, it's too bad that I didn't see ya first. You could have experienced the real deal." He said flirtatiously.
To say that I was shocked at his words would be an understatement. It was nothing out of the ordinary for him to speak that way to most woman, or so I had heard, but to talk to me like that, in the situation that we were in, set me off in a way that I couldn't control. It angered and infuriated me that he would start off our conversation that way. He was here to say good bye to his dying wife and all he could do was act like a twenty year old jerk in heat. No wonder Bosco didn't want to have anything to do with him. He was nothing but a selfish old pervert that had absolutely no tact, and definitely no charm.
He had the nerve to come here and belittle his son at a time when emotions were raw and wounds were open and it disgusted me. I should have kept my mouth shut and left well enough alone, but the very thought of letting him get away with saying something inappropriate and nasty was too much for me to take.
I had lost three children in the span of two months, almost lost the love of my life, and was now losing a woman who was like a second mother to me, and I did not have time to stand around and flirt with my fiancee's father. I took a step back from him and narrowed my eyes, as to show him my true feelings and intentions. I wanted to make it clear that there would be no niceties exchanged between the two of us.
"No. Actually, he always had brains and a ton of charm, but he got that from his mother's side." I replied cooly.
"Oh....that's the way it's gonna be is it?"
"Gonna be? Is there any other way?"
"Oh come on, Faith...we're practically family. I always joke around like this...don't be so...."He looked up at the ceiling as if to find the words to express what he meant. "So....anal." He finished, winking at me.
"Did you just call me anal"? I whispered, as I sometimes do before I blow up and really get angry. Who did this guy think he was?
He ignored me and stepped inside. That's when the smell hit me. He was obviously drunk or if not totally drunk, at least coming off of a bender. The stale smell of cigarettes and beer hit my nostrils and made me want to be sick.
"Are you drunk?" I asked incrediously.
He again ignored me and walked into the kitchen, surveying everything, almost inspecting. He walked over to the table and picked up the mail and began to look through it. Next, he walked over to the sink, no doubt looking for dirty dishes. Then he opened the fridge and peeked inside, all before my shocked eyes. For I never expected this.
"She never was much of a house-keeper, even in her younger years." He commented as he continued to root around.
"I think you should leave." Was the only thing I could say. Could I really let him go and see Rose in the condition he was in? What would Bosco do if he found his father drunk first thing in the morning?
He turned to me, a flash of anger passing through his dark eyes, and smirked at me. "You can't tell me to leave my own house, girl."
"This isn't your house. Not anymore. You can leave or I can call the police, who would be happy to cart your ass out of here". I said more forcefully. I wanted to make my point clear, yet I didn't want to wake the rest of the house, and especially not Rose.
He threw back his head and laughed. "Oh, I really am scared. I'm about as scared of you as I am my loser son. Always threatening me, telling me to get lost and never any muscle to back up his big mouth."
I walked into the room, closer to him, but not too close. "I guess you've forgotten the time that your son broke two of your ribs and your nose. Who was crying then, huh? You think you're a big man Raymond? Coming home, beating on your wife, hurting your kids? Big man." I hissed at him.
The smile vanished off of his face and something darker and more sinister appeared. Granted, I was insulting him, and quite nastily, and shouldn't have done it when he was drunk and abusive, but I felt a great serge of power right then. The need to tell him the things he should hear, for fear that he would get lucky and die without ever being accountable to anyone for the pain he had inflicted on his family.
I imagined that this was what life was like for Rose and Bosco and Mikey all of time. I shuddered to think of facing this man every day of my life, and especially to a small child. He was an ogre. I don't know how they had ever made it out alive. An intense wave of rage came over me, when I thought about all the times he had hit them. Beat them unconscious. Starved them. Locked them in their rooms for days at a time. I saw red. I wanted to kill him then. Not a good way to feel about your future father-in-law.
"You think you know what it was like having to live with them?" He barked. "Coming home to this pig-sty, nothing cooked, nothing but whiny kids and a no good cheating wife to boot? You don't know nothing about this family! Having the shame of knowing that you've got not one but two sons who are total losers! Do you know what it's like not having sons who look up to you? Who want to be like you? Part of the family heritage? Soft, pansy's are what I got. You should know, you're gonna marry one!"
" Ya. Just what the world would need: Another couple of alcoholic bums who talk and act like you! Losers? You don't see that YOU are the loser! YOU are a disgrace!" I yelled, not caring if I woke anyone or not.
"You know what a disgrace is? I bet you wouldn't know one if it hit you in the head you dumb pig!"
"Ya. I'll tell you, Raymond. YOU. YOU are a piece of garbage. YOU ARE NOTHING. Your son is fifty times the man than you ever even think of being....Maurice is gold and you are the tarnish that is washed up and rusty. The kind that no one wants. The kind that people through into the garbage because no one wants it around."
"You got a big mouth. You should learn to keep it shut!" He screamed at me.
"Whose gonna shut it? You? You'd never live to regret it. Now, get out of here before I call the cops. We'll tell Rose that we couldn't find you, you'd only end up making her more upset anyway."
He started toward me, his hand held open, for he was going to slap my face, and hard. I stood my ground, but raised my hand and pointed at him to let him know that I wasn't afraid of him.
"You realize that you're gonna go to jail for that? I'm a New York City Cop, Raymond. I know a lot of guys who'd love to get their hands on you Raymond. Make no mistake. If you touch me, one hair, one little tap, you're gonna be sorry that you were ever born!" I said, as cool as ice.
"What the hell is going on here?" I heard Bosco shout from the top of the stairs. He ran down, taking two at a time, his eyes wider than I'd ever seen them.
He rounded the corner and came into the kitchen. His face was a conjure of emotions. Anger lit him from the inside out, sadness etched into his eyes and I immediately felt guilty for waking him up and making him listen to my ranting.
"What's going on here?" He shouted, looking back and forth at the two of us. Raymond put his hand down at his side and opened his mouth to speak. I cut him off.
"We were having a difference of opinion. It's ok now." I said, glaring at Ray, hoping he had the good sense to keep his mouth shut.
Not a chance there.
"Your girlfriend here, decided to speak for you and tell me exactly what she thought of me." He began.
Bosco glanced at me before turning back to his father. "She did, did she?" He folded his arms over his chest and stood his ground. "It's a shame that I had to miss it. You bein' father of the year an all."
Raymond blanched and pointed his huge finger toward Bosco's face. " You listen to me, you ungrateful , spoiled brat! I didn't come here to listen to this crap! You'd think that you'd be thinking of your poor mother instead of standing here lecturing me about stuff that makes no difference to anybody!"
I sucked in my breath and prepared myself for the worst. Raymond couldn't have picked a better choice of words that would both hurt and infuriate his son. I reached out to put my hand on Bosco's shoulder, to lend him the strength I felt he needed, and he shook my hand off and took a step forward with his fist in the air.
He stood in front of Raymond, his chest heaving in and out, his face red with anger and prepared himself for the confrontation that had been years in waiting.
He had waited a long time to tell Raymond exactly what he thought of him and now, granted not a good time, he was going to untangle himself from the chains that had bound themselves to his soul. The chains that nearly destroyed him and left him unable to have normal relationships.
It had been years since Raymond had left them. Years that Bosco had fought with himself to rebuild his broken self-esteem and years of tangling with the guilt he felt for being too young to stop his father from hurting his mother and brother. I knew that this was going to get ugly and I also had the feeling that it would definitely become physical. Honestly, I didn't know what to do next. Should I get between them or let them finish what had started a long time ago?
Bosco's lips were curled up into a hateful sneer. He shook his head back and forth, as if trying to put into order the things he needed to say.
" Don't you ever throw ma in my face ever again, do you hear me? I'll kill ya. I swear on everything that ever meant anything to me. I'll kill ya!" He said in a menacing, low voice.
Raymond opened his mouth to speak but Bosco wasn't finished. "The only thing I think about is my mother. She means everything to me. The only reason you are allowed in this house today is because she asked for you. If it were up to me......"
Raymond snorted in contempt at his firstborn. "Up to you? And just who the hell do you think paid for this house? It's not up to you to do or say anything! This is my house, Maurice and I think I'll do what I damn well please."
"This isn't your house. Not anymore. I pay the mortgage here. It's in my name, not yours. You are in this house only because I love ma and she asked for you. As far as I'm concerned, the day you die will be the day I finally feel at peace. I hate you, dad. Hate everything about you and I wish it was you lying up there in that bed, cause she sure doesn't deserve to be there!"
They stood there, the contempt and hatred they felt for one another enough to suck all of the air out of the room. They both stood their ground, equally stubborn and equally hurt, and challenged one another with their hateful glares.
Raymond clenched his jaw and turned his lips up into a sneer, much like the one his son had made moments before, the resemblance between them uncanny, although I would never mention that.
He sucked in a deep breath and slowly expelled it from his mouth. I trembled as I stood beside Bosco, terribly afraid that the worst was yet to come.
"Now you know how I feel, Maurice. You were a mistake from the moment of conception. I begged your mother to get an abortion, but she wouldn't have it. I even tried to throw her down the stairs so she'd lose you a couple of times but....."
And that was as far as he got before Bosco's fist connected with his jaw. He tumbled over backwards, dragging Bosco with him. They rolled around on the floor kicking and punching one another and cursing furiously. Desperately, I screamed for them to stop. I made my way over toward them and Bosco yelled at me to step away.
On and on it went. For every punch that Ray got in, Bosco got at least two. The blood started to flow down both of their faces and made its way to the floor, dripping everywhere, as they grunted and growled at each other.
Disgusted, I ran over to the sink and pulled out the hose that was used to spray off the dishes and turned on the cold water full blast. I took careful aim and sprayed the water on both of their faces, drenching them and, of course, getting myself cursed at in the process.
However, it was enough to get them to stop. I had grabbed the cordless off the counter as I sprayed. I dialed the number to the precinct as I waited for them to stop.
"Faith, hang it up!" Bosco yelled at me. The last thing he wanted was his friends and colleagues coming to his home to break up a brawl between him and his father. I knew he didn't want anyone we knew to ever have the misfortune of meeting his father.
Grudgingly, I hung it up as Bosco and Raymond began to wind down. One by one they stood, sweaty and out of breath. Both bleeding from the nose and head. They weighed each other down by their stares and general loathing of each other. Not for one day could they be civil to one another and it broke my heart.
Raymond could never put aside his own needs and wants long enough to look out for someone else, even his own wife or children. Bosco couldn't let go of his own pride or hurt to ever just let go and keep his temper from boiling over. I didn't blame him. I loved him and I understood. If I could have, I'd of been the one to give Raymond a few cracks in the face.
Bosco walked over to the counter and spit in the sink and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He turned back to Raymond and cast him a scathing glare. "You couldn't stop drinkin'even for one day, could ya?"
Raymond snorted and held his hands up toward the ceiling. Mockingly, he cried out, as if to God. "See what I have to deal with? See why I drink? It's to get away from this madness!"
Bosco had heard enough.
He walked past his father and went into the downstairs bathroom and returned a few seconds later with a wet face cloth. He tossed it to his father and then pointed at him. "This is your last chance. Clean up your face and go and see ma. You got ten minutes and then you're out of here. I don't want to see your face again until....." He stopped short, not wanting to say 'her funeral'.
He walked past me again and went into the bathroom and shut the door. He didn't even so much as look at me when he passed and I knew why. He was falling apart from the inside out and he didn't risk looking me in the eye because he knew if he did, that he wouldn't be able to stop the damn from breaking. I really wanted him to let go and just cry or even talk about how he felt.
But my love, my sweetheart, had to be strong. He was desperately trying to prove to himself and to me that he could do it on his own. I was secretly surprised that he had hung on as long as he had. It was as if he were convincing himself that she would get better and things would go back to normal. The worst part about it was that he wasn't realistic and the pieces would fall where they may, but would I be able to hold him up during that storm?
Raymond didn't look at me either as he passed by me and walked up the stairs. I wasn't sure if I should follow him or wait for Bosco, so I hung back by the edge of the stairway, incase I needed to go upstairs or tend to Bosco downstairs.
I stood there biting my nails and straining to hear something, from either direction, but I heard nothing. After a couple of minutes Bosco came out of the bathroom. He had toilet paper rolled up in his nose and a band-aid across a cut on his forehead. Instead of walking toward me, he turned and went into the living-room instead and sat down on the couch. I followed him and sat down beside him, hoping that he'd say something. Neither of us spoke, so we just sat there in silence.
He laid his head back on the headrest and closed his eyes. "Great family you're marrying into." He grumbled, half to himself.
"Bosco, I'm sorry about what happened in there....I shouldn't have said anything to him but he was so.....so rude and he was saying horrible things and I....."
"Don't worry about it. It happens every single time he comes here." Came his reply.
"Bos, are you sure it's ok for him to be alone with her up there?" I asked tentatively. I wasn't sure that it was a good idea, considering Raymond's lack of emotion or all round good sense.
His eyes snapped open and he looked over at me, a pained expression on his face. "No. But she wanted to see him." He said sadly. "She always wanted him." He added as an afterthought.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"Nope."
"It might be good for you. You're holding everything in."
"There's nothing to say."
"But, you'll feel better if you just stop trying to do this all on your own."
"Just let it be."
"Bosco. I know you're hurting and at a time like this, you need someone to help you grieve".
"Faith. Let it be." He said, more forcefully. But I couldn't let it be. I wanted to help him, to comfort him and he wasn't understanding me or my intentions.
I scooted over next to him and ran my hand through his shaggy hair. He seemed to relax a bit under my touch. "Bosco, why can't you let me in?"
"Let you in?"
"Ya. You're shutting me out of everything. How you feel, what you think. I don't think it's healthy. I want to be here for you the way you were here for me when Emily and Charlie died."
"Ma isn't dead yet, incase you havn't noticed." He snapped angrily.
"I didn't mean...."
"I said I don't want to talk about anything. Why can't you just leave it at that?" He half shouted at me. He stood up and pointed to the ceiling above him. "I got her upstairs, dying and him up there saying who knows what, and I"m sorry, but I can't take time to sit down and chat with you."
With that, he left the room and went upstairs. I sat there, stunned by his meanness and his anger, usually not directed at me. Thick tears fell from my cheeks and dripped off my chin. As I sat there in self-pity, wondering why I always said the things I said, it occurred to me that he was just getting angry at me because I was the closest person to him. He couldn't get angry with her. He couldn't even deal with Raymond properly. What was between him and Ray wasn't anger; It was downright hatred and there was no other outlet for them but physical.
I knew he was biting at me, but that didn't make it hurt any less. This was draining him; mentally and physically. It was only a matter of time, but I knew that his resistance was wearing thin.
A few minutes later, Raymond came down the stairs and then out the front door. He slammed it hard behind him and I wasn't sure if anything else had happened, but I knew I'd soon find out.
I went into the washroom and splashed my face with cold water. As I looked at my reflection I noticed how haggard and tired I looked. My hair had even lost its usual brightness. I didn't know how much longer either of us could go on like this.
I opened the door and came out into the hall. That's when I head the screaming. Loud, harsh, glass shattering cries coming from upstairs.
Terrified, I raced up the stairs and down the hall to Rose's bedroom and thrust open the door........
TBC