A Piggie Hoggle Wart

Yes! I've finally done it! My perfect Harry Potter fic without having to deal with the plot that J.K Rowling's already made! No flaming me for lack of Harry, Draco, Ron or Hermione! I love them, I swear on it! But I really, really, stink at making fics with other people's characters or plots all twisted in them (Expect for my Spikey... pets her Spike)! So I'm doing this my way! YAY!

Disclaimer:Harry Pepper is not a book, J.K Rowling is a genius, and the only thing I own are the characters that weren't in the books .

"You're going to WHERE instead of a normal middle school?!" Her mother's lawyer face, the face that was supposed to make any corporate enemy shake in his boots. Pity it didn't work on her 11-year-old daughter.

"Hogwarts." Sandra Marrel said evenly, not backing down. "It's like Pigwarts, you know, like in the Harry Pepper book? Except this one is real."

Her mother was now blatantly staring, but her father was not as immobile, apparently, because he fled to his feet swiftly, trying to use his height against her. It didn't work; he was only a few inches taller than her. "You stop this foolishness this instant, young lady! Have you completely lost it? There is no HoggiePigglewarts-Whatever school! It. Was. Just. A. Book."

"Howarts." She repeated, "And, yes it was. But Hogwarts is actually real. And. Wasn't. Part. Of. Any. Book." She mimicked his movements and tone of voice perfectly, knowing exactly how to get to him

Before her father could explode into the roaring, screaming cave man that lived beneath his flesh, her mother intervened. "Dear," She said in a singsong voice one would use on little children, "I know that starting a new school is going to be hard," She even bent down to be eye level with her daughter, "But that doesn't mean we don't love you, so you don't have to make up stories any more, it'll be okay."

Sandy coughed gently, trying very hard not to scream at her parents' denial. "What? You need to see the letter?" She held it up, showing them the flowing handwriting and wax seal that proved its authenticity.

HOGWARTS SCHOOL

of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY

-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --

Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore

(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock,

Supereme Magwump, International Confed. of Wizards)

Dear Ms. Marrel,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.

Yours Sincerely,

Minvera McGonagall,

Deputy Headnmistress

Her mother promptly fainted. Her father, for once, couldn't find any voice to yell with.

Once again, don't blame me for lack of delicious Draco goodness (or any other goodness! badness... ness)! Other than that... review away? I must go run watch my crappy teen sitcoms now. Yes, I am ashamed. No, not enough.

I'll write more later.