Thanks to all of my faithful readers and reviewers...sorry this has taken me so long to put up.

Something knocked the wind out of Remus Lupin and he woke up with a start. It was Hermione. "Come on Remus, get up! It's Christmas!"

He glanced over blearily at the clock on his bedside table.

"Hermione, it's only 6 in the effing morning! Confusions say that old men need more sleep than crazy young people too pumped up on Christmas!"

"Is that in Zen and the art of Dating Old Men Around Christmastime?" she shot back.

"Yes, as a matter of fact is it." He replied with a straight face.

"Come on you two! Quit snogging and get down here!" Ginny shouted up the stairs.

"How do you know we're snogging and not presently engaged in other activities?" Remus yelled back. Hermione punched him in the arm and groaned as a loud retching noise from Ron made its way to their ears.

"Remus..." she began. "I know amor...I just love to bait him though!"

The twinkle in his eyes made Hermione think that this must be what he would've looked like when he was one of the Marauders.

"You're a cheeky devil this morning."

"Of course! It's Christmas!" And with that, he slung Hermione over his right shoulder and began to carry her off downstairs to open presents.

Everyone began to open his or her gifts. Harry and Ginny both promised Hermione that they would put her book to good use while Ron looked heartily concerned. He yelped when Hermione opened her gift from Ginny-a copy of The New Joy of Sex.

"I think I'm going to like this book." Remus commented.

"Down, wolf boy." Ginny commanded jokingly.

"Ginny!" her brother protested, scandalized.

"I think poor Ron is going to be permanently scarred for life by the time this vacation is over!" Remus joked.

"I'm already bloody scarred for life." Ron replied, shuddering.

Remus's gift from Harry and Ron was a new set of robes.

"We had Hermione give us the measurements...we didn't ask how she got them!" Harry said with a distinctly evil chuckle.

"You people need to get your bleedin' minds out of the gutter." Ron complained.

They calmed down and continued tearing the wrapping paper off of various items. Hermione loved the book that Remus had found for her and swore she would begin reading it later.

Just then, someone knocked at the door. Remus answered it, to find Fred, George, Molly and Arthur Weasley on his doorstep.

"Hello Remus! May we come in?" Arthur asked.

"Arthur! Great to see you! Come on in!" Remus replied in an overly hearty voice so that Ginny and Hermione would know to hide the naughty books from Mrs. Weasley.

There were a couple of flushed faces and elevated seat cushions under two young ladies, but nobody except Harry, Remus, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny were the wiser.

More gifts had to be opened, and Remus was shocked to find a letter from the Ministry. A magical relative of his over in America had died, leaving all of his money to Remus. It came out to about 38 million galleons. Hermione noticed his shocked face, and took the letter from him. She read it, and then squealed with delight. "Remus, that's great! Not that your 3 times removed cousin died, but that he left it all to you!"

Everyone wondered what the fuss was about and Remus recovered enough to explain. They were all very pleased at his stroke of good luck. Ron and his parents went off to talk, leaving Fred and George with the others. They got a kick out of the books.

"Mum would blow her top!" George announced.

"In a heartbeat." His twin added.

"That's why you're never going to tell her." Ginny said firmly.

"I don't know...this could be VERY good blackmail..." George mused.

"Tell Mum, and I will castrate both of you with rusty spoons so you get tetanus, and after I am done with that, I will shove the spoons so far down your throats that they will come out your arses."

All of the men in the room winced. "I think we'd better do what she says before we die." Fred said with a pained expression on his face.

"Right." George replied. "We've got to run-George and I are having Christmas dinner at our girlfriend's houses."

"Have fun you two!" Remus called after them absentmindedly. His mind was more on the conversation taking place next door between Ron and his parents. His keen wolf hearing told him it wasn't going too well. He wondered what on earth Christmas dinner was going to be like...