Disclaimer: I don't own The Slayers! Sad for all of us rabid Slayers fan girls, ne? If I DID own Slayers I'd let y'all get a little piece of all the guys! Bwahahha. Don't sue me, not like you'd get any money out of it anyway
Authoress ((Miho)): This chapter would be the completely insane and irrelevant chapter! I'm forcing the characters to do some stupid things, Oh and I CAN'T decide what I should put Romance/?. Jeez! Help me out here!
Lina: No, don't help her, you should SEE the script for today. I mean COME ON, WHY DO HAVE TO WEAR A PINK FRILLY THING?!
Gourry: Actually Lina, that's tomorrow script.
Amelia: Hai, Lina-san! Today is just the crazies; I think it has a slight plot that IS relevant to the story mind you....
Zelgadis: Irefuse to take any part in this story...
Miho: Remember Zelga-bunny-chan I'm the Authoress...YOU DO WHAT I SAY, or remember those nude pictures I have of you and Amelia?! I'll post them EVERYWHERE! Bwahahah!
Amelia: Oo;;;;; You wouldn't! In the name of justice I shall get those pictures and BURN THEM!
Zel: Fine...I'll go along with your damned story. Hmph...
Miho: Gommen everyone, Zelga-bunny-chan is being a meany. Lina-san, you don't have any more objections do you?
Lina: Of course I damn well do! I mean, SURE you may be the authoress, but you can't make me do these ridiculous things!
Xellos: Oya? Lina-chan, you said you would last night! I mean we've already sl--- OOof!! Lina-chan, throwing heavy objects at people ISN'T very nice.
Lina: Shut the crap up Xellos before I fire ball you to death, or better yet sic Filia on you!!
Filia: I have NOTHING to do with this chapter so stop trying to pawn him on me!
Miho: SHUT THE CRAP UP!!! Jeez, let me get on with my dang story. It's hard when all of you tards are arguing...But I don't mind if Xellos keeps talking! He's my fav! (Tehehee!)
Gourry: Ano....shouldn't we start soon?
Miho: Gourry, sweetie, please be quite for a second and let big sister do her work.
Gourry: I have a sister?
Miho: No I was just saying that.
Gourry: Why?
Miho: For effect...or something. Now do as I say and STFU. Thank you.
Amelia, Lina, Zel and Filia: Grumble
Xellos: Oya, Miho-sama if you like me so much why am I getting paired with....Not you?
Miho: Because my lovely little mazoku, I love the paring you are getting into. Teheheh.
Lina: So ominous....Jeez.
Miho: ON WITH THE FREAKIN' STORY!!! Psst...Amelia, what the crap are the crazies? Yes I realize--- oh look the opening credits!
I would like to give a special thanks to everyone who's been reviewing. It may not have been much, but it helps me to continue onward. Now if all the tards of the cast are done whining and have decided to shut the crap up, we may start. Oh right, this chapter, as Amelia said...is crazy. Yes Crazy. Good and crazy indeed. Good god am I talking to myself? ARE YOU PEOPLE LIST—er READING?!?!?! Ehehheeee.e..e.....
Lina: I personally would like to inform you that Miho has gone insane, if you get a seizure or something like that...or you die from the bad humor attempts, don't sue her. She'll just plead temporary insanity. Thank you and goodnight.
!!!IT WAS SOMETIME IN THE AFTERNOON!!!
"Liiinnnnnaaaaaa!" Gourry called, "What's wrong come out of your room!" Lina's angry shout was muffled but could be heard, "GO away Gourry! Just go away! I don't wanna see you right now!"
Gourry continued whining, "But but LINA we have to go to the festival! I have to meet up with Sylphiel!" Lina let out a low snarl at the name, "I DON'T wanna go to some stupid festival!" Gourry sighed, but continued to knock. Lina had been so moody when she had arrived back at the Inn.
Zelgadis was leaning against a wall to the left of the door. "Hmmm...Gourry, have you tried to simply OPEN the door...you know...with the door KNOB?" Gourry pondered for a moment, "Good idea Zelgadis!" With that Gourry opened the door. Zel put his hands in his head, "L-sama, why me? WHY ME?!"
Lina scowled in the direction of Gourry. "Get the heck out of my room! I don't WANT to go to the festival!" Gourry looked a little sad, "But Lina, why not? It's the pink dress you have to wear isn't it?" Lina glared at him again, that was only half the reason. 'I can deal with the damn dress, I just don't want to see you and Sylphiel together all evening...I'M THE ONE SUPPOSED TO BE WITH YOU!' Those bitter words raged through her head, but of course...the dress was pretty horrid too.
Lina nodded trying her best to hide what she really thought. Gourry laughed, "Oh come on Lina, you look great in a dress! It makes your flat chest look bigger!" Lina's eyebrow twitched in furry, she grabbed the largest sharpest thing she could find and threw it at Gourry's head. Gourry yelled in surprise trying to dodge that and the other 20 things flying at him. Gourry ran for his life shutting the door behind him, only to hear Lina's cry of victory.
Zel gave Gourry an odd look, "Why'd you say something concerning Lina's breast size? That's a death wish..." Gourry sighed, "I was trying to cheer her up! She doesn't seem her usual self." Zel was tempted to smash his head against a wall, "Of course THAT wouldn't cheer her up!" Gourry only wondered why not.
Amelia was just waking up. Stretching out her legs and arms she let out a loud yawn. 'TODAY IS THE DAY OF THE FESTIVAAALL!' her mind sung rather loudly...if that's even possible. Amelia jumped up after having stretched out all the creaks and pains in her back. "I think I'm going to go ask Lina-san if she wants to take a dip in the hot springs with me!" ((Yes this Inn has a hot spring!!))
Lina heard a knock at her door and went to open it up, as she opened it she was ready to scream incoherent things at Gourry, but standing there was Amelia. "Ano, Lina-san," Amelia started smiling brightly, "Do you want to take a dip with me in the hot spring before the festivaaal?" Lina nodded and the two girls walked off to the hot springs.
Lina: I see NOTHING crazy yet.
Miho: Oh don't worry you will...eventually..maybe....
Amelia: You're just calling this chapter crazy so you can record us talking aren't you? That's unjust!
Xellos: Amelia-san, please, don't start.
Amelia: LIFE IS WONDERFUULL!!!
Xellos: Why L-sama, why?! Xx;;;;
Miho: AYYEE! AMELIA!! NOOO! STOP WITH THAT!! ARGH! THE PAAIN! OX;;;;
Amelia: Ano..Miho-san is also a mazoku?
Miho: Duh? Can you not SEE my damned eyes?! Look girl! Amethyst silted eyes, just like my little Xellos-Wellos!
Lina: Xellos...Wellos? Are you in love with him or something?!
Miho: Of course I am.
Lina: Then why are you paring him with---
Miho: Because I love that freaking couple. Now shut the crap up and keep watching the damned story. Gourry and Zel are being good little boys...why don't you be like them?!
Lina: because I'm not a boy?!
Miho: I love you Lina! ;;
Lina: What in L-sama's name?!
Lina and Amelia arrived at the hot springs, only to find that it was an all male hot spring! Lina mumbled, "Well that sucks, might as well NOT go to the festival because we CAN'T take a dip in the springs!" Amelia on the other hand was waving like a maniac in the direction of...none other than FILIA!
Filia waved back as the two sorceresses ran toward her. "Filia?!" exclaimed rather surprised. Filia nodded and smiled, "I was in town and wanted to bathe in the springs so I came here...but it seems to only be for men!" Amelia scoffed, "That's unjust! Come on, we'll just sneak in and soak before anyone sees us!" Lina looked shocked, "With a bunch of dirty old MEN?" Filia didn't seem to fazed, "She has a point Lina, around this time of day mostly no one is here." Lina's eye twitched, but she gave in. The three were heading into an all MALE hot springs!
Lina slipped her naked body into the hot water, Filia was right; there was no one but them there. Filia was already sitting beside Amelia, both sighed in satisfaction. Lina yawned and ducked her head under the water blowing a few bubbles, she could hold her breathe for a long while yet. She would have stayed under if she hadn't heard Amelia's and Filia's surprised cries.
Lina surfaced from the water, standing with her hands poised to fire ball the crap out of someone, but both Amelia and Filia were attempting to hide themselves under the water. "Eh?" Lina said, looking rather confused. Amelia pointed with a shaky finger to the doors of the spring. Standing there in toweled glory were Zelgadis, Gourry and...XELLOS?!
Lina's jaw dropped as she saw the three men, with just as shocked looks on there faces...all except Xellos that is. Lina threw herself under the water, she didn't even want to cast a spell, she just wanted to die right there on the freakin' spot!
Gourry was the first to speak, "Ano....can we come in as well?" Filia was glaring at Xellos to much to even hear him, and Lina was so embarrassed she had turned around in the water and was now mumbling incoherent things to herself. Amelia spoke up, "Uhm...You can. IF you keep your towels on and pass us our towels." Lina and Filia still void of what was going on, had no idea that the guys were now in the water with them.
Xellos with his trade mark grin sat in front of Lina handing her a towel. She grabbed it quickly wrapping it around herself.
Miho: Aren't I evil? I just feel like leaving it like that. I'm getting writers block, someone HELP ME OH GOD HELP! I DON'T WANT TO DIE MOMMY!
Filia: Miho-sama, are you ok? I'm not your mommy, you can stop clinging to me...
Xellos: Miho-sama! Get off of that filthy dragon she'll give you the plague!
Miho: Oh frick right...Filia is a dragon. Gommen Filia, but I'm not to fond of dragons. Ahahaa....XELLOS-KUN TT COMFORT ME!
Xellos: There there, it's ok. I won't let that awful dragon hurt you. Cling to ME all you like.
Miho: 3. 3333!!!
Xellos:
Filia: Good lord, this is crazy. If you ' 3' him so much why are you paring him wi---
Miho: SHUT THE CRAP UP YOU DAMNED DRAGON!
Filia: Don't be a speciest!
Miho: That's like someone who doesn't like other species right?
Filia: Right.
Miho: Filia love, I'm a mazoku, you shouldn't like me either.
Filia: Miho-sama...you're a MAZOKU?!
Miho: Uh yeah.
Xellos: A very masochist and sadistic one at that, though she doesn't show it.
Miho: Shh people aren't supposed to know that!!
Xellos: But it's such a sweet attribute, Miho-sama.
Lina: No. It. Isn't. Now stop flirting with her!
Xellos: Would you rather I flirt with you Lina-chan?
Lina: Ye- NO! NO! NO!
Xellos: Heheheh.
Zelgadis: Thank god this chapter is over.
Gourry: Will there be more?
Lina: Oh L-sama, Xellos saw me naked! OO!
Amelia & Filia: We were mostly under water.
Lina: You screamed! WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO!? OO!!!
Miho: Yeaaah, I probably wont include all this stuff next chapter, by stuff I mean all them there tards talking. Bye bye for now!!! Oooo look closing credits...
As I put this rather short and slightly odd chapter to a close, I'd like to say: If you don't R&R I'll hunt you down and kill you. Please think of the tards...er I mean slayers cast, and R&R.
Yours truly,
Miho Katsunami, AKA. The authoress.