Beyond Fragile

I will never forget that night. How my life was ripped apart in a matter of seconds. How I, Hermione Granger, age of 21, was perceived as fragile. A term I've never wanted to be used for me. I was always strong, resilient. Each and everyday I try to prove myself to my peers, who didn't always see highly of me.

But for that moment in time, where everything I held dear was taken away. I felt the way I always tried to avoid; fragile.

4:45 AM

Tap……… Tap………..Tap……

She awoke to a faint tapping sound in her room. Hermione sat up suddenly in her bed, always the light sleeper. Her heart was beating at a normal rate. She wasn't scared, just startled. Her apartment usually had its usual bumps in the night, but it was always nothing really. She briefly looked over at her nightstand, making sure her wand, her security blanket, was still where she left it. After reassuring herself that everything was fine, she lowered herself down into her bed, closing her eyes trying to get back to sleep.

Tap……. Tap……….Tap……

There it was again. Hermione didn't even open her brown eyes, knowing that it was nothing. Then she felt a faint touch at her feet. At first she thought it was Crookshanks, but as it moved up her leg, Hermione came to realize that this was no cat touching her. This was a person. Her eyes popped open to see the shadow of a man standing at the foot of her bed. Her first reflex was to reach for her wand on her nightstand. Hermione's heart sank when she realized that her wand wasn't there anymore.

The man is face still hidden from the shadows walked to her bed and sat down. His voice was muffled but the severe tone it had was enough to stop Hermione in her tracks.

"Make a sound and so help me god." He held a knife to her throat. Hermione's blood ran cold.

"Please, please take anything you want. Just go." Her voice was wavering.

The man was silent when he stood up and started to undo his pants.

Hermione's heart sank to the bottom of her stomach as realization was sinking in.

He climbed on top of her, grabbing hold of her hands and raising them above her head. With his right hand, which still held the knife, he firmly pressed it against her throat, as if to give a warning to her not to make a sound.

His hand traveled down to her bottom. And from then on, Hermione felt cold. It consumed her. She did as many women tend to do during this violent act. She just lay there, paralyzed by fear. She tried to think of anything else besides the pain and the heartache she was feeling right now. She had an out of body experience. She saw her hallow eyes, eyes looking off into a different place, eyes that were filled with tears, she saw the man on top of her, creating a most violent and obscene crime.

She then came to her senses. What was she thinking? Why wasn't she doing anything? Then she felt the cold metal of the knife on her skin. Hermione decided to do the next best thing. She memorized his face. Even though it was dark, she could still make out some features of the man. He was Caucasian, dark hair, mole on left side of jaw bone. She could taste the bile in her throat as she thought as if she was going to vomit. She could feel the blood dripping. She could feel him. She could taste him. His sent was musty and strong.

And then, just as soon as it started, it was over. It was then that Hermione started thinking rationally. The man sat up from the bed and breathed quietly. Hermione quietly watched him, studying him.

"If you go to the police, I'll kill you." He said calmly.

Hermione nodded dumbly, hoping the monster would just leave quickly. And luckily, he did. He made his way for the door. Hermione noticed that as he was leaving, he threw her wand on the table by the couch. Hermione waited until she heard his footsteps move down the hall. Her heart stopped as she heard him go down the stairs. The monster was gone.

To numb to even cry, Hermione ran for her wand. She grasped it in her hand tightly, savoring the safety that was in it. Or once was in it. Suddenly, her wand didn't seem so secure anymore. If she had her wand, she never would have had to endure THAT. But it wasn't there. So many times she had depended on it, and now it failed her.

Angrily, Hermione threw her wand across the room. It bounced to the floor in a deafening tap. In a delayed reaction, Hermione felt her whole body shake with sobs. Tears stream down her face, dripping to the hard wood floor.

How could this happen to her? Why didn't she fight back? Hermione's head was racing and everything seemed amplified. The silence that was around her consumed her whole. All she could hear was the thud of her heart. She could hear the blood coursing through her veins. It had a sickening flow.

After what seemed like an eternity, Hermione felt herself being drawn into a fitful and harsh sleep.

Harry James Potter, boy wonder, savior of the world, had just woken up. It was a beautiful morning, around 6:00 or so, birds chirping and the sun shining. He quickly got dressed, noting that he was in a good mood. He dressed in his usual black robed uniform, which was required as an Auror. At 6:45, he made his way to work.

He quickly apparated to Auror headquarters, and greeted the front desk lady, Mrs. Henderson.

"Morning Mrs. Henderson." Harry greeted cheerfully. The usually bored looking Ms Henderson regarded Harry with a bright smile.

"Good morning Harry, how are things going at the office?" She asked, her grey hair shimmering in the morning sun.

"Oh you know the usual. You know, I thought being an Auror would be all excitement and craziness. But now all we do is filling out paper work."

"What, you don't like your job Harry? Because really, you're practically made for the job." Mrs. Henderson said with a smile.

"No I'm not, just a little disappointed. Well I best get going. Don will probably have aneurism if I'm late again. Bye Mrs. Henderson.

Sure enough, Harry's partner, Don Fitzgerald, did have a perpetual aneurism. As soon as Harry walked through the door, Don pounced on him.

"Why are you late?" Don asked.

"I'm not late. I'm three minutes early." Harry said pointing to the clock. Only to realize that he was in fact 6 minutes late. " I'm sorry Don, I was just talking to Mrs. Henderson, that all."

"Yea, the same excuse everyday. It always either you had to get a cup of coffee from some muggle shop, or you were talking to that blasted woman. Can't you come up with anything else Potter because frankly, I'm getting bored" Don said as he sat down at this desk.

"What does it matter anyways Don? We are just doing paperwork! Not like it's that important!" Harry yelled as he pointed to the pile of work on Dons deck.

"Listen Potter, I'm sorry if this isn't exciting for you, but this is what you're current job consists of. You're misconceptions that this job was all excitement and fun. Well that was just some stupid teenage fantasy. This is the real world. We may go out and catch the bad guys, but we also have to fill out paperwork too. You don't like it LEAVE!!!!!!!" Don yelled pointing at the door.

Harry looked defiantly at his partner, green eyes challenging blue. Finally in a silent resolution, Harry sat down at his cluttered desk. The paperwork seemed to go on for hours. Harry didn't put much thought process into the questions. His mind was else ware.

At 12:00 it was finally time for lunch. Harry rose from his chair, sending one last glare over at his busy partner. He quickly apparated out of the building and made his way over to his favorite little restaurant. Harry was particularly excited about this lunch because today was the day he was having lunch with his best friend, Hermione.

They hadn't seen much of each other for the last couple of months. Both of them were too busy with their jobs to talk anymore. Hermione had made an effort in becoming an Auror, and excelled greatly in it. But soon she discovered teaching was more of her passion. She had an apprenticeship at Hogwarts with professor McGonagall.

The three of them, Harry, Hermione and Ron made an effort to get together every three to four months. Ron, who was still indecisive about his profession, had taken up to working in Romania with his brother Charlie.

Harry entered the restaurant, and the hostess sat him at a table near the window. Harry watched people pass by the window, wondering what their lives were like. It wasn't long until Harry realized that Hermione was a half hour late. His brow furrowed in thought.

Hermione wasn't usually late.

Harry waited a couple more minutes before he rose from his chair and made his way out the door. He apparated to Hermione's apartment in Danbury, Scotland. She had chosen to reside on Scotland during the summer months so she could still train with McGonagall.

Harry arrived outside her apartment door. He knocked lightly, hoping that she would answer. She didn't. Harry knocked the door harder, and still no answer came.

Harry started to panic. He quickly took his wand and muttered a spell. The door opened quietly to an empty apartment.

"Hello, Hermione?" Harry called.

No answer

"Hermione, it's me." Harry made his way towards Hermione's bedroom.

He heard some rustling of sheets. He opened the door to find a very scared and fragile looking Hermione.

"Hermione, where were you? What's wrong?" Harry asked, his confusion rising at the fear in her eyes.

Then realization hit him like a ton of bricks. He had seen that look before, in the eyes of women who had been attacked by criminals, death eaters. Harry's heart sank. Not Hermione, this couldn't happen to her. His feet felt like they had lead in them as he walked close to her bed. He could see the blood on the sheets. He could see the tear stains on her cheeks. He could hear her heartbeat quicken as he drew nearer.

"Harry." She said in a little voice.

"Hermione, its okay. Come here." Harry said softly.

Hermione hesitantly crawled closer to him. Harry could see the tear welling in her eyes. He could see the hurt and the fear and embarrassment in them. Harry knew there was no need for the last part. Harry felt anger rise in him as he thought of the monster that did this to her, and how much he wanted to kill them.

"Harry I don't know- he was just there- kill me- so s-scared-and then--!." She sobbed frantically into his shoulder.

Harry quickly picked her up and walked over the living room and laid her down on the couch. She was crying uncontrollably, salty tears falling from her face as if there was a never ending river in those ducts. He walked over to the kitchen and started to make some tea for her. Harry glanced over at the clock and realized he was 45 minutes late for work again. He didn't care.

He walked back to her with two mugs full of tea. By that time, her crying had calmed down. He sat there silent, trying to exude calmness so as not to scare or get her nervous; which was hard feat for Harry to achieve, since every blood vessel was magnified with anger and the need to kill.

But he had to be strong.

For her.

After spending the night on the recliner as Hermione slept next to him on the couch, Harry's back was killing him. But he didn't show the pain, because he knew that his minor back pain was nothing to the emotional anguish his friend was going through.

They hadn't spoken. Hermione was grateful for Harry's silence. Harry, on the other hand, was trying not to ask her questions. He did not want to rush her into speaking about… it. He just wanted her to calm down. But Harry's quiet tongue didn't last long.

"You have to go to the authorities." Harry croaked out.

"Yes I know." She sounded small.

Harry turned over to her, his green eyes penetrating into hers. Hermione had to look away because under his gaze she felt small and helpless. She didn't want to feel anymore of that than she already was. "Do you know if he was a…. death eater or……a muggle?" Harry asked

"I'm really not sure." She said gazing intently at the floor. " When I woke to him, he… he took my wand. So-"

"So obviously he was a wizard." Harry interrupted.

"I don't know, because when he was… h-holding me down, he used a knife." Hermione could feel the cold metal of the knife digging into her skin. She imagined there would be imprints there.

"And he didn't apparate into my apartment or out." Hermione said quietly.

Harry nodded.

"Are you okay?" Harry said hoarsely. He was afraid of this question. He wasn't sure if he could hear her cry again. It was shattering.

She nodded. Her eyes glazed over a bit "Yes, Harry I'm fine." She said shortly.

"You sure?"

"As fine as one could be under the circumstances. Maybe even better" She said smiling slightly.

"Alright" Harry nodded. He knew that she was lying. She was putting up a strong façade for him, so as to not get him worried. Which Harry knew was completely absurd. But, that was Hermione. She was always thinking of others before her, even in the direst of situations. She was putting up a strong barrier around her pain.

A barrier that Harry knew was going to crumble.

"When do you want to leave for the hospital?" Harry asked.

"As soon as possible." Hermione said as she looked out her window to the world above.

"Well do you want to shower or something?"

" I cant. His…..there might be evidence." She said averting her gaze to the world outside her window. It was a beautiful summer afternoon. After a long week or so of raining, the sun was shining with a stunning intensity. Hermione briefly thought of how ironic things could be sometimes.

How the most beautiful day of the week

Turned out to be the most painful and dark day of her life.

Harry walked slowly over to the couch and offered her a hand of assistance. Hermione hesitantly took it. It was rough but smooth at the same time.

Quickly they apparated to the nearest hospital. St Mungos, was a alive with intense activity. Medi- Witches were bustling about with usual morning businesses. They walked to the counter, a bored looking woman with graying hair sitting there.

" I would like admittance for this woman." Harry said

" You have to wait on line sir, there are many other people ahead of you." She pointed to a large group of people sitting in the waiting room with angry expressions on their faces for having to wait so long in their situation.

"We can't."

"What makes your situation so much more important that theirs? What can possibly make you go ahead of the guy with the thorn in his eye? Or the woman who's spleen is spouting poisonous puss through the toenail? "She questioned

"Nothing but maam- this is a trauma patient."

"Most of these people are going through trauma one way or another. How can hers be more significant that theirs? "

"Because-"Harry didn't want to say Hermione's condition out loud, knowing how embarrassed she would feel. He quietly walked behind the counter bending down to the woman's ear.

'She's been raped."

The woman's expression softened a bit, turning towards Hermione with sad eyes." Okay, I'll let you through. Can I just have your name dear?" She took out a form and a quill.

" Hermione Granger." She whispered. The woman head shot up, her expression became even sadder.

" Okay, Miss Granger you room is 265, I'll have someone show you where it is. " She said as he grabbed a key from a hook " I would like to say, that I'm sorry about your current state. Its such a shame that one of the wizarding worlds most influential heroes has to go through such torment. If you need me, my name is Allie Callhoun. I'm a nurse on the third floor, just send for me okay?"

Hermione nodded. They waited for a total three minutes before a man showed up to take Hermione to her room. Harry could sense the timid ness rolling off of Hermione in waves. Just as he was going to follow them up, the nurse grabbed hold of his shoulder.

"Sir I need to know your name so I can file a police report and send it to the Auror headquarters."

"Oh um, Harry Potter." He said distractedly as he watched Hermione walk down the hallway.

"I'm sorry mister Potter if I was a little rude before, I did not recognize you." Nurse Callhoun apologized.

"That's okay. Would you like me to fill that out? Then I could take it back to my job."

"That would be very nice of you Mister Potter." She smiled warmly as she handed him the report. He turned and made his way out the door. " Oh and Mister Potter-" Harry heard " You can come a visit her later in today." Nurse Callhoun called to him.

(((U)((&

"Potter, why the hell are you so late? Half the Goddamn day is gone!" Don yelled at his partner

"Don, I had an emergency." Harry said, not even wanting to talk to his partner.

"Oh so now it's a different excuse? How the hell did you ever defeat Voldermort if you're this irresponsible?" Don questioned angrily.

"Listen, I have no reason to tell you why I was gone for so long; none. All I can tell you is that I had to bring a friend to St. Mungos. That's all I can tell you." Harry said through gritted teeth. Harry turned to leave with Hermione's form still in his hands. That man infuriated Harry, with his strict rules and the way he demeaned Harry. But Harry could not get a new partner, for it would be severely detrimental to his career. Don was the most successful Auror, after Mad- Eye Moony. Harry would like to train with one of the best. Unfortunately, Mad-Eye retired and ultimately a year and half ago.

Harry went up to the third floor, where the special victims unit was located. Most of the other floors dealt with either murder mysteries or magical crimes. Those floors were where he and his partner dealt. The special victims floor dealt with abusive crimes, whether manually or magical. Harry had only been up here a couple times, to get files or someone's name. But today, regretfully, was totally different. He wished it wasn't that way.

"Hello, I would like to file a case report and have someone come to St. Mungos to check out a rape victim." Harry hated calling Hermione a ' Victim' because she had never been one before.

"Okay, can I the victims name?" the young woman with blond hair asked

"Hermione Granger." Harry said grimly. The woman looked up at him sadly, obviously knowing the history of the little spitfire who attended Hogworts and helped Harry Potter through many perils, physically and mentally.

"She is currently residing at St mungos, is that correct? Can I have her room number?" She asked.

"Um Room 265 I think." Harry said grimly, his mind too occupied with his friend.

"Okay her evaluator will be Mr. Simonize-" The woman spoke

"Do you think the evaluator can be a woman? I don't think—I don't know if she'll feel comfortable around a man."

"Sure, how about Mrs. Wood? She will be seeing her at 10:15 tomorrow morning." She asked.

"That should be fine."

" Harry can you please fill out the form, describing the state the victim she was in, physically and mentally, when you found her. Were there any lacerations on her body—"

" Yeah I think I know how to do this " Harry interrupted, trying not to sound irritated. Harry stared at the form, the cold sheet of paper that had to pertain to his dear friend :

Name: Hermione Granger

Age: 20

D.O.B: October 21st 1980

Race: Caucasian; female

Auror's name: Harry Potter

Action performed on victim that caused victim to react towards authorities: Rape

Date and time victim found: July 12th 2001; approximately 2:34 pm

Is victim being treated: Yes

Specify treatment center: St Mungos

Evaluator: Bridget Woods.

Harry finished filling it out, anger flooding through his veins throughout the whole process. He shouldn't have to be doing this. Not for Hermione. Hermione was the only stable person in his life. Of all the people in his life, she was there through think and thin. Come hell and high water; she was there. She is an incredible person who stood strong in most situations that would have sent men twice her size running home with their tail between their legs. And now to see her strength crumble, her quiver with sadness and fright, it made Harry's heart crumble for her. He never wanted to see the strongest person in his life cry like that again. But there would be many more times in the future when he would see his strength fall to the floor in tears and torment; this he knew.

($(&(

Hermione sat in the bed, the cold crisp white sheet giving her Goosebumps across her skin when she moved. The room was small, equipped with a bathroom and chairs to boot. She did not see the reason why she needed a room, when really she wasn't injured at all. But she knew that she was going to be evaluated by the Medic- Witch and possibly a Auror doctor in the near future.

It was late, around midnight, and it was quiet. It sent chills down her spine, making her clutch the blanket closer around her for a meager attempt to get warm; when really warmth wasn't the problem, it was the quiet. For when she was quiet, it gave her time to think. Normally Hermione enjoyed the quiet, giving her busy mind to think things through reasonably; mathematically. But tonight was not a night where she wanted to sit and think things through. She did not want to relive that. She could barely blink without seeing his figure by her bed. She couldn't even inhale without smelling his deadly smell. She then decided that she should try to thin about other things.

She was slightly disappointed that Harry had not come to visit her, for she was looking forward to seeing him, to get her mind off of other, more terrifying things. But he hadn't come to her. Hermione reasoned that maybe he got caught up at the office, possibly a new case, or more paperwork. Hermione smiled at the last time she spoke to Harry before this, for he was complaining about the nonstop paperwork that he had not expected in his profession. She remembered saying:

"Harry, being an Auror isn't all about excitement and chasing the bad guy. You've got to realize that." Hermione said before she put a forkful of fish in her mouth

"I know that. It's just not what I expected."

"Well I'm sorry reality had to come and bite you in the ass." She said with a mischievous smile on her face. He laughed despite her jab at his ego.

She heard a hoot at her window, letting her know that she had gotten mail. She immediately recognized the owl as Harry's, another snow owl named Chester. Hedwig had died a year ago, due to heart failure. Hermione remembered Harry being devastated when she had passed, for Hedwig was Harry's first friend and confidant. Her and Ron immediately pitched in and bought him a new owl; one with the same personality as Hedwig, but not one so much like her so as to take her place.

Chester held out his leg, showing her the parchment tied to her leg. She immediately took it off, and gave Chester a pat, sorry that she didn't have anything to give him. She opened the letter, curious as to what Harry would want.

Hermione,

I'm so sorry I could not visit you tonight; I was very busy at the office. Don gave me a hard time as usual, but it didn't matter.

Tomorrow, be prepared for an Auror doctor to fully evaluate you. Her name is Bridget Woods. She's a very nice woman, though I have only spoken to her a couple times. I will be there with you, so as to support you.

Again sorry for not visiting.

Harry…..

Hermione knew just as well that he had been bust at the office. She knew that he would have visited her no matter what, if his job allowed him.

)((&&(&(

Harry had actually lied to his dearest friend; and though it hurt him to actually do that for his friend in her time of need. But he had to have sometime to himself. Sometime to grieve for the pain his friend was going through, the anguish and torment. But he also had to cry for himself. You see, Harry had always been selfish, though not perceived by others. Emotionally, he was immature and needy. In all other aspects, he was a great person, but there were always times when he needed something for himself, a person, time, an object, anything. Though he cried for Hermione, he also cried for himself, though he was not sure why. Just an onslaught of emotions can running through, and traveled in the form of tears.

He fell asleep soon after he came home, a sleep that can only be characterized as tragic. For in his dream, he kept on finding Hermione curled up in a ball in the Gryffindor common room, their usual hangout in school. A place he had always perceived as safe. When he confronted her, she looked up at him with scared wide eyes. Her lips were parched, and her skin pale. He noticed her mouth moving, but he could not hear anything. he moved in closer, to hear what she was saying.

"Jai guru deva om "

And like that, it was over. That sentence plagued his mind throughout the day, until he finally went to see Hermione.

In room 265, he entered trying to keep his composure. She looked so tiny in that bed. So helpless; which was not Hermione.

"Hey." She smiled slightly.

"Hey." He said.

"When's the—"

"She should be here soon." Harry interrupted.

They sat in silence. Harry trying to think of something to say that wouldn't sound too cruel or anything. Hermione was just enjoying his company either way. The silence was interrupted by the footsteps of a middle aged woman with brown hair entering the room. She was dressed in a black business suit.

"Hello, I'm Bridget Woods. You must be Hermione. I've heard much about you, and I'm sorry to have to meet you under such terrible circumstances."

Hermione nodded.

"Now I would like to ask you, it's private, so I don't know if you want Harry to leave?" Mrs. Woods asked

"No he can stay." Hermione said simply.

"Alright. When was your last period?"

"June 10th that's when it began. And it stopped June 15th." Hermione said simply. She took hold of Harry's hand, knowing where this was leading.

"Is your cycle regular?"

"Yes."

"So that means that you must be getting it soon right?" Mrs. Woods asked.

"Correct."

"Would you like to know if you are pregnant?"

"Can I wait a while?" Hermione asked, not wanted the question answered right away, more for her own emotional reasons than practical.

"Of course. Now, from the charts that the Medi- Witches showed me, they took semen samples from your vaginal region, and a foreign pubic hair, Is that correct?" Hermione could feel Harry tense up beside her. It was obvious he wasn't comfortable with this conversation, and to be truthful, either was Hermione. But she needed him there

"I guess." Hermione said, her brows furrowing in thought.

"I'm going to have to leave you here for now Ms Granger. I want to check out those samples and get it back to the agency so we can run some tests. You're lucky, sometimes I have to give a physical examination, just to check over things that the nurses might have missed. But since they found something, I don't have to. And again, I'm sorry for your current predicament. Have a nice day." And at that, she left.

"That was quick." Hermione finally said watching the woman leave.

"Yea." Harry said, though is sounded distracted.

"Harry what's wrong?" She asked.

Despite him, Harry laughed sadly "I don't think you should be asking that question. I think it should be the other way around." But then again, that was always Hermione, thinking of other people before herself. It's what made her beautiful, but it was also one of her biggest downfalls.

"Harry, come on. Just tell me what's wrong." She demanded.

"I'm fine. Just tired. "He rubbed his eyes." When are you being let out?"

"The nurse said I can leave today."

"Great."

"Yea let me get dressed." Hermione got up and gathered her clothes from the day before, which were pajamas. She went into the bathroom to change. Harry was alone in his thoughts for the next couple minutes.

His dream confused him. The message had been cryptic, and in another language. Harry never ignored dreams, especially when they were cryptic. The language spoken was something he did not recognize. But Harry was also confused about something else; his feelings for Hermione.

His train of thought was interrupted by Hermione entering the room again, dressed in her pajamas. She smiled despite the pain in her step.

"Why are you walking like that?" Harry asked stupidly.

"Um… My thighs are—"Hermione looked down at her feet, feeling ashamed.

"Oh. Come on, let's get going." He said suddenly, offering her his arm. She linked her arm around his, her small arm contrasting with his bigger one. They walked slowly down the hallway.

Slowly but surely, they made it to the front entry. They walked out the doors, into the bright English sun..

"You ready? "

"Yea."

And like that they were back at her apartment. Hermione then let go of his arm, and Harry was disappointed at the lack of warmth he felt at the absence of her hand.

"Would you like something?" She asked, making her way towards the kitchen.

"Actually I have to get back to headquarters." He said. At the disappointment on her face, he continued " Wish I could. But I'll come back as soon as I am let off. I promise."

" Okay." Hermione smiled despite the fear that she was feeling at the thought of being alone again.

" I promise." He said to her before he apparated.

Hermione looked at her Muggle clock. It was 12:23.

Harry was getting off at 5

)(&$$

The day wore on very slowly for Harry. More paperwork was assigned, which did not make anything better. On the plus side, Don apologized about being a dick the day before. Apparently he had found out about the incident with Hermione from Mrs. Woods, to whom he was very good friends with.

As soon as it was 5 o'clock, Harry apparated immediately out of the Headquarters. He came upon Hermione's apartment building and ran up the stairs leading to her door. Her room number was 7, a lucky number. He went to go open the door, only to find that it was locked. He knocked three times before she opened it, her wand ready in her hand.

Harry also noted that Hermione's eyes were red, indicating that she was crying.

"Hey." She smiled

"Hey, before I come in, do you want me to get something to eat for us?"

"Yea, that would be nice."

"Does Italian sound good?" Harry asked

"Um, yea that would be good. But don't get anything too big. I'm not that hungry." She said to him. Harry replied with a wane smile, trying to show that he understood. But inside, he was contemplating if he should get her something large to eat, since he knew she wouldn't be eating too much in the coming days, or months. Harry knew then that he would have to watch her eating habits.

The little muggle restaurant was crowded, filled with hungry people with irritated looks upon their faces. Harry knew that Italian food that was made anywhere besides Italy was bad and in other words crap, but he did like it for some reason, it was pretty decent. He ordered a meatball sub for Hermione and himself, along with a small salad which should keep her quiet in case she should get all health food crazed on him.

He walked out of the restaurant and pulled into a dark alleyway, where he apparated in front of her apartment. He knocked twice and she opened it, without her wand in her hand, letting him know that she knew it was him at the door. Her eyes were still red.

" I got you a meatball sub and a salad." He walked into the kitchen and took out the items from the bag. Hermione went to her cabinet and took out plates. They both seated themselves at her couch, choosing comfort over the necessity of a table. They both ate quietly, trapped in their own thoughts, both too afraid to say any thing.

"So how's work?" Hermione finally asked, never one for silence when her mind was in so much turmoil.

"The same really. No new cases, so which means paperwork. Seriously, I wish I could just find a spell where I can just say an incantation and 'Poof' everything would be ready. Maybe then I would have Don off my ass."

"I don't think there is a spell for that." Hermione said before taking a bite of her salad. "And Honestly Harry, I think Don is on your ass because he cares."

"Yea well he has a funny way of showing it."

"I think he sees your potential, and he doesn't want to see you screw it up."

"I killed Voldamort Hermione, I'm sure it's pretty impossible for me to screw up."

:" True. Don't we think highly of ourself? "

The rest of the conversation mostly revolved around casual things, keeping away from recent events, both too afraid to bring it up. Although Harry wasn't sure if he wanted to hear about the crime made against his friend, he would talk about it with her if she wanted. But she hadn't brought it up the whole time, keeping the talk cheerful; fake. But this brought up another question in his head.

Did she not feel comfortable enough to talk about it with him?

This couldn't be true, for Hermione always told Harry things that were bothering her; as did he tell her things. Harry could remember that they both always stayed up late to talk about things they both thought they couldn't tell anyone else. Harry spoke the most though, and Hermione mostly listened. She was always had been a good listener, whereas Ron was not, for he was too opinionated to keep quiet. And although Hermione is opinionated, she knew when to shut it off at certain times

Harry glanced at the muggle clock.

It was 11:45 pm.

He had work tomorrow

"Hermione, I should get going. I have an early day tomorrow" He spoke

Hermione instantly felt her heart quicken its pace. She was going to be alone again. She was going to be alone to sleep in the bed where she was violated a day and half ago.

"You okay?" Harry asked as he stood

"Harry, would you be mad if I asked you to stay over tonight?" her voice was small and her eyes had a sign of panic in them.

She stared up at Harry, her face showing the fear at his answer. How could he leave her now? What was he thinking?

"Of course I'll stay." He finally said, and she breathed a sigh of relief. "I'll sleep on the couch."

Hermione was about to agree until "Actually Harry, would you mind sleeping with me tonight?" Hermione hated being so forward about things, but she really did not want to be alone.

Harry was surprised by her proposition. She must be really scared' He thought.

"Sure."

He followed her into the bedroom, where she muttered a spell to lighten it up. Harry stared at the bed. All he saw was Hermione laying there, being raped, being violated, being tortured by some unknown man. He wasn't sure himself if he could sleep in the same bed as where the incident took place.

" Um, Hermione do you think I can apparate into my apartment to get something to wear for tomorrows work day?"

" Sure, but you cant disapparate back into the apartment, I put new wards up today… just in case."

" Okay." Harry then disapparated into his apartment where he quickly got some clothes tomorrow. Harry then appeared back to the outside of her apartment. He knocked twice to let her know that he was there, where she answered after a couple of seconds.

Harry noted that she had changed into a new pair of pajamas, shorts and a tee shirt. He could also see the uneasiness on her face. Harry had to admit right then and there that she looked absolutely gorgeous.

Harry knew he had always had a soft spot for his friend. Ever since the end of his 7th year, he had always felt something for her. She was smart, a genius even. Although she had not been extremely gorgeous in her younger days at Hogworts, she had become a pretty girl, with simple and graceful features on her face. But what Harry had loved most about Hermione was her extreme loyalty and her huge heart. Never had he witnessed her regard someone with a snide or cruel face, not even Malfoy in the loneliest and hardest time in his life. She welcomed everyone with open arms and warm smiles. She truly was a remarkable and beautiful individual.

A one of a kind.

But really he had not noticed this until now.

Harry watched as his friend laid her angelic head down on her pillow, her back towards him. His green eyes followed as she pulled the blankets over her small body; clutching them tightly. She turned her back away from him, only the small outline of her curves and her hair poking out.

He could tell she was still awake; her body did not seem relaxed enough to really be in slumber. She didn't seem relaxed at all, her stiff posture showing this. He did not notice that he was still standing, watching her. You don't notice a lot of things when you're mesmerized. He laid himself down beside his friend, not taking his eyes off of her petite figure. She did not stir.

"Hermione…" He whispered into the darkness. Only the moon shone through the window, creating enough light for him to see the beautiful creature in front of him.

"Hermione come here…" He reached his left arm out and she turned towards him. Her eyes, her gorgeous brown eyes were full of tears.

"Harry, thank—"she whimpered softy. In a calming and soothing fashion, something so unlike him, Harry pulled her towards him. She instantly stiffened at the close proximity. He held her close still. Over time, she relaxed against his body, while she continued to sob into his shoulder.

They stayed like that for a while, him holding her and her crying into his shoulder. It wasn't long until she tried to pull away, her body going stiff and rigid again. But he held her still, because for once in his harsh and cold life, Harry felt complete; fulfilled. To him, it felt right to have her tears soak his shirt. It felt right to have his arms around her. It felt right to have her hair tickling his nose. It felt right to feel the sobs shaking her body vibrate into his chest. It felt right to kiss her forehead. And even though she tried to push him away,

He held her closer still.

For he was a selfish man.

(((&

Had to revise this because the computers gay and deleted like half of the ending on the fanfic site, and I had to rewrite the ending.

I hate computers

Later kiddos