DISCLAIMER: i am not the author of the harry potter universe, as much as I'd like to be :( i dont own anything you recognize
AN: Hello All! I am BACK! Sorry... It's been a while... but.. :sigh: school is challenging and has put me behind schedule... ::wince:: im sorry to all of my LOVELY reviewers for taking soooo long!! you have no idea how happy you've all made me!!!!!!! i love all of you!!!!
AN: PLEASE review!!! I cannot believe how many reviews i got for last chappie- i got double what i got for chappie 2!!!!! i was soooo happy ::wipes tear:: pleasepleaseplease keep it up!! i love you all!!!
MY AWESOMELY SMASHING REVIEWERS:
Zayne: you've read a story where she was allergic to him? that seems kinda silly... anyways, thanks so much!!! ::gives annmarie a chocolate bar::
New-York-Angel14: thanks so much!! [us new york gals gotta stick together! ...tho... technically... i dont live there anymore..but... still!!] thanks for reviewing!!! here's another chappie!!! ::hands NewYorkAngel14 a chocolate bar::
LisBleu: THANKS SO MUCH! here's another chappie ::hands LisBleu a chocolate bar::
randomfrizzhead: i know it was kinda sad ... thanks for reviewing! ::hands randomfrizzhead a chocolate bar::
James-RoxMySox: they are all confused, arent they? ::sigh:: remmi has always been a smartie [truth be told, he's always been my favorite...] he does some "detective work" in this chappie- or at least tries to... you really think my writing is enthralling?::smiles and bursts with happiness:: that is one of the nicest compliment i've gotten! im glad you like it so much! here's the update and your chocolate ::hands James-RoxMySox a chocolate bar::
the-power-of-love: thanks! here's the next chappie... ::hands the-power-of-love a chocolate bar::
Book Lover990: i've updated as fast as i can!! [p.s. love your name-y thing. i, too, am i book-a-holic...] ::hands BookLover a chocolate bar::
Melissa Black13: thanks soooo much! i kinda wanna hit lily too, but ::sigh:: you gotta remember what she's been thru... she doesnt exactly trust her feelings very easily and she's confused and scared! i hope you dont die from waiting so long, cuz then you wouldnt get to read this chappie :) ::hands MelissaBlack a chocolate bar::
angelzsweet90: moony is the bestest, aint he? you are very welcome for the lollipop! ::hands AngelzSweet a chocolate bar::
shadowphoniexstar: im glad you liked the lollipop!!!!!! here's the chappie!!!! ::hands shadowphoniexstar a chocolate bar:: [not that you need the sugar...but... hyperness makes good reviews... :) hinthint]
dreamy-crazygirl: im always glad to have new reviewers [they just brighten up my day!!] im glad you liked the kiss [tho its not very well written... i did my best] and i know, any normal girl wouldnt have run, but lily spazzed out. she freaked.... what can i say? its all part of the story... and ::sigh:: it would have been over if she stayed, and i have something big planned [tho not for a few chappies] so keep reviewing, cuz im gunna keep writing!!!!!! oh, and no, lily doesnt really have friends...just... aquaintences, more like just people she knows and doesnt fight with. she's a loner, so she kinda distances herself from everyone... its just a part of her character, i guess, to close herself off.
KBS: im glad you like your lollipop. i know... she is a bit clueless, aint she? confused... she got scared and spazzed- i mean, her whole life since her family was killed wasnt full of love and happiness... she was alone and pissed off... so, this new emotion [tho she doesnt know quite what it is] freaked her out... its just new and scary for her.... and now im rambling and might end up giving away something imprtanat so ::zippers lips closed:: i know i didnt post as quickly as usual, but blame my school!! tis eeeeevvvvvviiiiilllll!!! and ::sigh:: my spelling is really bad... and i always say "Vold-er-mont" so, thats how i spell it... im gunna try to change it, but sometimes its automatic, so please forgive me if I mess it up again. thanks for filling me in, tho, so that i can avoid it in the future.
THANKS TO ALL OF MY BEAUTIFUL REVIEWERS!!!!!! ::takes out a chocolate bar for meeeeeee:: hehe. i dunno why i do that. bribery works wonders... :) plus, you all love me so much, you'll review...right?
Chapter 4: Small Talk
Lily wasn't sure how long she had been in that room, probably only an hour, but obviously it had been long enough for one of them to come looking for her... Look up, Lily saw Remus was standing above her, a curious look on his face.
"Hello Lily." Remus said quietly, "Care for a walk?" He asked. Lily put her head back down on her knees and told him to just go away, but he didn't listen. Instead, Lily could feel him sit down next to her and lean his head against the wall. When she sneaked a glance at him, she saw he had his legs crossed in front of him and was staring at the ceiling, lost in thought. Her head returned to her knees and she closed her eyes again, waiting for him to get up and leave so that she could be alone and figure everything out.
"So, finished that Charms essay yet?" he asked, trying to break the uneasy silence. Without looking up, Lily just told Remus to sod off and the two fell silent once again.
"I have, but I still have to finish that Transfiguration essay she gave us yesterday." he commented nonchalantly after a considerable amount of minutes had passed silently.
"Then go finish it" Lily said in a monotone, dead voice.
"You know who's great at Transfiguration?" Remus asked, ignoring Lily's suggestion for him to leave. "James is great at Transfiguration..." Lily sighed, and realizing that he probably would never leave, she got up and began to walk out of the room.
Right before she left, Remus finally gathered enough courage to ask "Lily, how did you know what the letter said?" She stopped right in front of the dorrway and truned around, suprised to see Remus standing a few feet away. She shrugged and said simply "I didn't." He was confused...
"Well, then... how come you seemed to know what happened?" She sighed and said quietly, "Look, I really don't want to talk about it, ok? Can I please just leave? I'm tired."
"No." He said abruptly, stopping in his tracks, "Lily, I think I have a right to know: how did you know what happened?" She stopped and looked as if she was trying to keep her anger under control.
"Why? Why do you have a right to know?" She asked indignantly. For a few moments he was quiet, trying to gather his reasoning... "Well.. because James is my friend! If you know something that can help, than I should know!"
"Well, how would you pestering me about my past help James in any way?" She asked, her voice breaking... Remus seemed to have no answer to that. She sighed. "Look... I don't know what that letter said, ok? [shrug] I guess I can just deal with grief pretty well, is all." Remus looked up at her.
"Well, as far as I know, you've never had to deal with any grief..." Remus said, his brow furrowed in confusion... She laughed, but it was a cold, bitter laugh... "Shows how little you know, doesn't it?"
And with that, she walked off towards her dorm, hoping James would be asleep by the time she got there. Where else was there to go? Besides, she didn't want to talk anymore...everytime she talked to anyone recently, she'd let something slip that she wanted to keep to herself...someone would figure it out, she knew it would happen eventually... it was only a matter of time.
She metally kicked herself. Why did she always have to say something? She went a good two years without mentioning anything to anyone..and now? In the past 72 hours, she's almost blurted everything out to at least TWO people.... what would she do if either of them figured it out?
When she reached the portrait that led to their Common Room, she yelled up the password [which had been recently changed to "Linsel Tights"] and the man in the portrait sleepily opened, grumbling about getting his beauty sleep. Silently, she stepped inside and rushed quickly to her dorm. When she reached the door, she took a quick look around and was relieved to see James was no longer occupying the Common Room. Briefly she wondered where he was, but she just assumed that he was in his room, sleeping. Exhausted, Lily stumbled into her room and fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
[what happened to James after she left]
James just sat there, stunned. Lily had kissed him. Lily Evans. Lily Evans had kissed him. Had kissed him. Kissed James. James Potter. No doubt about it. She had kissed him. Than, she ran off. He hit his head with his fist repetitively. Why didn't he say anything? Why, why, WHY did he just sit there? WHY did she run off? After about an hour of beating himself up, he heard someone come in.
"Ya'know, mate, I don't think you can afford to lose that many brain cells..." James looked up to see Sirius come through the potrait hole. James just smiled feebly and put his head in his hands.
"She kissed me" he said groaned quitely, clearly distressed. Sirius looked at his best mate with confusion.
"Who?" Sirius was in the dark. Who could have kissed James? He was practically dying right in front of him, and he hadn't left the room all day. The only person who had been in there beside Remus and himself had been-
"Evans?" he asked, eyes wide. James just nodded miserably. Sirius leaned back in his chair, amazed.
"Mate. SHE kissed you, and you're miserable? What the bloody hell is wrong with you?" James looked up at Sirius like he was insane.
"Well. First off, she ran away. Do you see her here? She spazzed out. Plus, I'm not exactly in the best shape to start a relationship... I don't think it'd be the greatest if I suddenly started crying on a date because I saw some little girl pass, ya'know?" With a deep sigh, James leaned back on the couch and looked at his mate, who's face seemed to be frozen in confusion.
"Yes, but, if she ran off, you don't have to worry about a relationship you don't want. And, James, I saw her in here before, she didn't seem to mind that you opened up. I think she'd only want to help." His voice was soft and understanding, he didn't want to upset his mate for no reason.
"But I DO want the relationship, it's just we have such bloody awful timing!" He was getting frustrated. He took a deep breath and let out a deep sigh. "I shouldn't even bother worrrying, not like she'll ever talk to me again. I can't believe I messed this up! We haven't fought in ages!" Sirius shook his head.
"Actually, you fought last week, but it was more like a lover's spat anyway. She likes you, mate, she's just scared. Do you know where she went?" James rolled his eyes.
"If I knew where she was, do you think I'd be here?" he asked
"Yes." Sirius replied, almost cheerful. James grabbed a pillow and threw it at Sirius, who ducked and threw another back at him. Soon, there was an all-out pillow-throwing war. When the two were finally tired out, Remus entered the Head's Common Room to see Sirius and James sitting on seperate couches, laughing their heads off, covered in feathers.
"So, how many pillows did you kill this time, you two?" Remus asked, his voice light. The two other boys just laughed a bit more and chucked another pillow each at Remus feebly, neither making it even halfway towards where Remus was leaning against the wall.
"Good to see you smiling, James." Remus said as he sat down in a chair nearby. The smile immediately dropped from his face and was replaced by a look of guilt. After shooting a dirty look at Remus, Sirius tried his best to cheer his mate up again.
"Prongs- Prongs, you know she would have wanted you to live your life. She wouldn't have wanted you to suffer..." James just closed his eyes and leaned back onto the couch. They were silent for a few moments until Sirius asked James, yet again,
"Prongsie, do you know where Evans is? I'd like to have a chat with her about... our Charms assignment.." Sirius said, smiling slyly. James just threw another pillow at him and turned to Remus.
"Moony, you got the map?" James asked and Remus nodded, pulling it out of his cloak pocket. "Good. Make sure Padfoot over there doesn't get it." Sirius just made a disgruntled-whine kind of sound and tried to work his puppy-dog-eyes magic on Remus, who wasn't buying it.
"What do you wanna see Evans for?" Remus asked curiously. Sirius shrugged and glanced at James. Remus' eyebrows raised a question and Sirius just shrugged again as a response. Remus nodded slowly with understanding and stood up, taking the map with him, of course.
"Well, Prongs, I think I'm going to go visit the library right quick. You two might want to consider cleaning all this up before Lily gets back, because I don't think she'll appreciate having all these feathers everywhere..." And with that, he left to go find Lily, who he saw was on the other side of the castle, a good twenty minute walk.
"Padfoot, did you mean what you said before? About how it's okay for me to be happy, 'cause she'd have wanted me to be?" James asked his friend after a few minutes of brooding over the possible answers.
"Yup. I always mean what I say, Prongs. You need to live your life." Sirius answered calmly.
"Do you realize what a load of bull that is? How can I feel okay living my life and having fun, when she isn't?" He asked quietly, a tear running down his cheek. Sirius sighed
"How do you know she isn't?" he asked just as quietly. James just stayed silent. The two of them stayed like that for a while, unsure of what to say. Neither had ever dealt like grief before and both of their natural reactions in the face of a serious thing was to laugh it off and joke and tease. But...this was different. There was no joke to make from this, no way to be the comic relief in this, no way to make it less serious, less painful. It was just there, and they could ignore it or drown in it, but James had a feeling it'd be a while before he accepted it...
James couldn't stand to be in that room any longer...he hadn't left the Common Room in a little over 2 days... He hadn't eaten since Christmas Eve dinner... damn, he was hungry.
"Paddy? I'm hungry. Lets go eat." James said simply before getting up and walking out of the Common Room. Waving his wand and muttering a spell, Sirius cleaned up the mess they made and the food that had been knocked down before he arrived. Then, they walked to the kitchen, where they found Remus waiting for them with the expression he always got right before he figured out a really hard ancient rune or arthimacy problem.
"Talked to Evans..." He said as the house-elves hurried about getting food. James looked up, worry and surprise in his eyes. "She didn't say much, told me to go away a lot and such. But, I think I figured out why she's acting the way she is. It's because-" James cut him off.
"She's dealt with death before. Probably a lot of it."
AN: PLEASE REVIEW. IT WILL MAKE ME VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY HAPPY!!!!!! PLEASE!! REVIEWERS GET... hmm... umm.. GIANT INTERNET GUMMIBEARS!!!!! [im running outta bribes people. help me out!]
AN: Hello All! I am BACK! Sorry... It's been a while... but.. :sigh: school is challenging and has put me behind schedule... ::wince:: im sorry to all of my LOVELY reviewers for taking soooo long!! you have no idea how happy you've all made me!!!!!!! i love all of you!!!!
AN: PLEASE review!!! I cannot believe how many reviews i got for last chappie- i got double what i got for chappie 2!!!!! i was soooo happy ::wipes tear:: pleasepleaseplease keep it up!! i love you all!!!
MY AWESOMELY SMASHING REVIEWERS:
Zayne: you've read a story where she was allergic to him? that seems kinda silly... anyways, thanks so much!!! ::gives annmarie a chocolate bar::
New-York-Angel14: thanks so much!! [us new york gals gotta stick together! ...tho... technically... i dont live there anymore..but... still!!] thanks for reviewing!!! here's another chappie!!! ::hands NewYorkAngel14 a chocolate bar::
LisBleu: THANKS SO MUCH! here's another chappie ::hands LisBleu a chocolate bar::
randomfrizzhead: i know it was kinda sad ... thanks for reviewing! ::hands randomfrizzhead a chocolate bar::
James-RoxMySox: they are all confused, arent they? ::sigh:: remmi has always been a smartie [truth be told, he's always been my favorite...] he does some "detective work" in this chappie- or at least tries to... you really think my writing is enthralling?::smiles and bursts with happiness:: that is one of the nicest compliment i've gotten! im glad you like it so much! here's the update and your chocolate ::hands James-RoxMySox a chocolate bar::
the-power-of-love: thanks! here's the next chappie... ::hands the-power-of-love a chocolate bar::
Book Lover990: i've updated as fast as i can!! [p.s. love your name-y thing. i, too, am i book-a-holic...] ::hands BookLover a chocolate bar::
Melissa Black13: thanks soooo much! i kinda wanna hit lily too, but ::sigh:: you gotta remember what she's been thru... she doesnt exactly trust her feelings very easily and she's confused and scared! i hope you dont die from waiting so long, cuz then you wouldnt get to read this chappie :) ::hands MelissaBlack a chocolate bar::
angelzsweet90: moony is the bestest, aint he? you are very welcome for the lollipop! ::hands AngelzSweet a chocolate bar::
shadowphoniexstar: im glad you liked the lollipop!!!!!! here's the chappie!!!! ::hands shadowphoniexstar a chocolate bar:: [not that you need the sugar...but... hyperness makes good reviews... :) hinthint]
dreamy-crazygirl: im always glad to have new reviewers [they just brighten up my day!!] im glad you liked the kiss [tho its not very well written... i did my best] and i know, any normal girl wouldnt have run, but lily spazzed out. she freaked.... what can i say? its all part of the story... and ::sigh:: it would have been over if she stayed, and i have something big planned [tho not for a few chappies] so keep reviewing, cuz im gunna keep writing!!!!!! oh, and no, lily doesnt really have friends...just... aquaintences, more like just people she knows and doesnt fight with. she's a loner, so she kinda distances herself from everyone... its just a part of her character, i guess, to close herself off.
KBS: im glad you like your lollipop. i know... she is a bit clueless, aint she? confused... she got scared and spazzed- i mean, her whole life since her family was killed wasnt full of love and happiness... she was alone and pissed off... so, this new emotion [tho she doesnt know quite what it is] freaked her out... its just new and scary for her.... and now im rambling and might end up giving away something imprtanat so ::zippers lips closed:: i know i didnt post as quickly as usual, but blame my school!! tis eeeeevvvvvviiiiilllll!!! and ::sigh:: my spelling is really bad... and i always say "Vold-er-mont" so, thats how i spell it... im gunna try to change it, but sometimes its automatic, so please forgive me if I mess it up again. thanks for filling me in, tho, so that i can avoid it in the future.
THANKS TO ALL OF MY BEAUTIFUL REVIEWERS!!!!!! ::takes out a chocolate bar for meeeeeee:: hehe. i dunno why i do that. bribery works wonders... :) plus, you all love me so much, you'll review...right?
Chapter 4: Small Talk
Lily wasn't sure how long she had been in that room, probably only an hour, but obviously it had been long enough for one of them to come looking for her... Look up, Lily saw Remus was standing above her, a curious look on his face.
"Hello Lily." Remus said quietly, "Care for a walk?" He asked. Lily put her head back down on her knees and told him to just go away, but he didn't listen. Instead, Lily could feel him sit down next to her and lean his head against the wall. When she sneaked a glance at him, she saw he had his legs crossed in front of him and was staring at the ceiling, lost in thought. Her head returned to her knees and she closed her eyes again, waiting for him to get up and leave so that she could be alone and figure everything out.
"So, finished that Charms essay yet?" he asked, trying to break the uneasy silence. Without looking up, Lily just told Remus to sod off and the two fell silent once again.
"I have, but I still have to finish that Transfiguration essay she gave us yesterday." he commented nonchalantly after a considerable amount of minutes had passed silently.
"Then go finish it" Lily said in a monotone, dead voice.
"You know who's great at Transfiguration?" Remus asked, ignoring Lily's suggestion for him to leave. "James is great at Transfiguration..." Lily sighed, and realizing that he probably would never leave, she got up and began to walk out of the room.
Right before she left, Remus finally gathered enough courage to ask "Lily, how did you know what the letter said?" She stopped right in front of the dorrway and truned around, suprised to see Remus standing a few feet away. She shrugged and said simply "I didn't." He was confused...
"Well, then... how come you seemed to know what happened?" She sighed and said quietly, "Look, I really don't want to talk about it, ok? Can I please just leave? I'm tired."
"No." He said abruptly, stopping in his tracks, "Lily, I think I have a right to know: how did you know what happened?" She stopped and looked as if she was trying to keep her anger under control.
"Why? Why do you have a right to know?" She asked indignantly. For a few moments he was quiet, trying to gather his reasoning... "Well.. because James is my friend! If you know something that can help, than I should know!"
"Well, how would you pestering me about my past help James in any way?" She asked, her voice breaking... Remus seemed to have no answer to that. She sighed. "Look... I don't know what that letter said, ok? [shrug] I guess I can just deal with grief pretty well, is all." Remus looked up at her.
"Well, as far as I know, you've never had to deal with any grief..." Remus said, his brow furrowed in confusion... She laughed, but it was a cold, bitter laugh... "Shows how little you know, doesn't it?"
And with that, she walked off towards her dorm, hoping James would be asleep by the time she got there. Where else was there to go? Besides, she didn't want to talk anymore...everytime she talked to anyone recently, she'd let something slip that she wanted to keep to herself...someone would figure it out, she knew it would happen eventually... it was only a matter of time.
She metally kicked herself. Why did she always have to say something? She went a good two years without mentioning anything to anyone..and now? In the past 72 hours, she's almost blurted everything out to at least TWO people.... what would she do if either of them figured it out?
When she reached the portrait that led to their Common Room, she yelled up the password [which had been recently changed to "Linsel Tights"] and the man in the portrait sleepily opened, grumbling about getting his beauty sleep. Silently, she stepped inside and rushed quickly to her dorm. When she reached the door, she took a quick look around and was relieved to see James was no longer occupying the Common Room. Briefly she wondered where he was, but she just assumed that he was in his room, sleeping. Exhausted, Lily stumbled into her room and fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
[what happened to James after she left]
James just sat there, stunned. Lily had kissed him. Lily Evans. Lily Evans had kissed him. Had kissed him. Kissed James. James Potter. No doubt about it. She had kissed him. Than, she ran off. He hit his head with his fist repetitively. Why didn't he say anything? Why, why, WHY did he just sit there? WHY did she run off? After about an hour of beating himself up, he heard someone come in.
"Ya'know, mate, I don't think you can afford to lose that many brain cells..." James looked up to see Sirius come through the potrait hole. James just smiled feebly and put his head in his hands.
"She kissed me" he said groaned quitely, clearly distressed. Sirius looked at his best mate with confusion.
"Who?" Sirius was in the dark. Who could have kissed James? He was practically dying right in front of him, and he hadn't left the room all day. The only person who had been in there beside Remus and himself had been-
"Evans?" he asked, eyes wide. James just nodded miserably. Sirius leaned back in his chair, amazed.
"Mate. SHE kissed you, and you're miserable? What the bloody hell is wrong with you?" James looked up at Sirius like he was insane.
"Well. First off, she ran away. Do you see her here? She spazzed out. Plus, I'm not exactly in the best shape to start a relationship... I don't think it'd be the greatest if I suddenly started crying on a date because I saw some little girl pass, ya'know?" With a deep sigh, James leaned back on the couch and looked at his mate, who's face seemed to be frozen in confusion.
"Yes, but, if she ran off, you don't have to worry about a relationship you don't want. And, James, I saw her in here before, she didn't seem to mind that you opened up. I think she'd only want to help." His voice was soft and understanding, he didn't want to upset his mate for no reason.
"But I DO want the relationship, it's just we have such bloody awful timing!" He was getting frustrated. He took a deep breath and let out a deep sigh. "I shouldn't even bother worrrying, not like she'll ever talk to me again. I can't believe I messed this up! We haven't fought in ages!" Sirius shook his head.
"Actually, you fought last week, but it was more like a lover's spat anyway. She likes you, mate, she's just scared. Do you know where she went?" James rolled his eyes.
"If I knew where she was, do you think I'd be here?" he asked
"Yes." Sirius replied, almost cheerful. James grabbed a pillow and threw it at Sirius, who ducked and threw another back at him. Soon, there was an all-out pillow-throwing war. When the two were finally tired out, Remus entered the Head's Common Room to see Sirius and James sitting on seperate couches, laughing their heads off, covered in feathers.
"So, how many pillows did you kill this time, you two?" Remus asked, his voice light. The two other boys just laughed a bit more and chucked another pillow each at Remus feebly, neither making it even halfway towards where Remus was leaning against the wall.
"Good to see you smiling, James." Remus said as he sat down in a chair nearby. The smile immediately dropped from his face and was replaced by a look of guilt. After shooting a dirty look at Remus, Sirius tried his best to cheer his mate up again.
"Prongs- Prongs, you know she would have wanted you to live your life. She wouldn't have wanted you to suffer..." James just closed his eyes and leaned back onto the couch. They were silent for a few moments until Sirius asked James, yet again,
"Prongsie, do you know where Evans is? I'd like to have a chat with her about... our Charms assignment.." Sirius said, smiling slyly. James just threw another pillow at him and turned to Remus.
"Moony, you got the map?" James asked and Remus nodded, pulling it out of his cloak pocket. "Good. Make sure Padfoot over there doesn't get it." Sirius just made a disgruntled-whine kind of sound and tried to work his puppy-dog-eyes magic on Remus, who wasn't buying it.
"What do you wanna see Evans for?" Remus asked curiously. Sirius shrugged and glanced at James. Remus' eyebrows raised a question and Sirius just shrugged again as a response. Remus nodded slowly with understanding and stood up, taking the map with him, of course.
"Well, Prongs, I think I'm going to go visit the library right quick. You two might want to consider cleaning all this up before Lily gets back, because I don't think she'll appreciate having all these feathers everywhere..." And with that, he left to go find Lily, who he saw was on the other side of the castle, a good twenty minute walk.
"Padfoot, did you mean what you said before? About how it's okay for me to be happy, 'cause she'd have wanted me to be?" James asked his friend after a few minutes of brooding over the possible answers.
"Yup. I always mean what I say, Prongs. You need to live your life." Sirius answered calmly.
"Do you realize what a load of bull that is? How can I feel okay living my life and having fun, when she isn't?" He asked quietly, a tear running down his cheek. Sirius sighed
"How do you know she isn't?" he asked just as quietly. James just stayed silent. The two of them stayed like that for a while, unsure of what to say. Neither had ever dealt like grief before and both of their natural reactions in the face of a serious thing was to laugh it off and joke and tease. But...this was different. There was no joke to make from this, no way to be the comic relief in this, no way to make it less serious, less painful. It was just there, and they could ignore it or drown in it, but James had a feeling it'd be a while before he accepted it...
James couldn't stand to be in that room any longer...he hadn't left the Common Room in a little over 2 days... He hadn't eaten since Christmas Eve dinner... damn, he was hungry.
"Paddy? I'm hungry. Lets go eat." James said simply before getting up and walking out of the Common Room. Waving his wand and muttering a spell, Sirius cleaned up the mess they made and the food that had been knocked down before he arrived. Then, they walked to the kitchen, where they found Remus waiting for them with the expression he always got right before he figured out a really hard ancient rune or arthimacy problem.
"Talked to Evans..." He said as the house-elves hurried about getting food. James looked up, worry and surprise in his eyes. "She didn't say much, told me to go away a lot and such. But, I think I figured out why she's acting the way she is. It's because-" James cut him off.
"She's dealt with death before. Probably a lot of it."
AN: PLEASE REVIEW. IT WILL MAKE ME VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY HAPPY!!!!!! PLEASE!! REVIEWERS GET... hmm... umm.. GIANT INTERNET GUMMIBEARS!!!!! [im running outta bribes people. help me out!]