A/N: Hi guys…. Well I don't own Beyblade or the characters linked to it. I don't own the poems at the end of every chapter unless stated otherwise. I own my characters.... Bret, May, Kate and the others that aren't from any Beyblade series… I own the plot and story line as it was my very creative juices that came up with it XP… well so yeah R&R

OMG we are up to part 14!! I can't believe this… I just want to announce that the songs I used last time don't belong to me they belong to— Hole (Miss World), Kittie (Brackish), Jerk (Say it), Hoobastank (Running Away), Life House (Hanging By A Moment) and well that's it XD… enjoy this chapter.

Can I Ever Forgive You?

Part 14

'Why was I here?'

'What was I doing?'

My eyes craned slowly opened to reveal the glistening moon. Her glow was illuminating the dull, barren surroundings around my fragile figure.

'Where am I?'

My feet dragged on along the dark gravel, dirt floor, as I soldiered heavily on. Clambering up the side of a steep slope.

Everything around me was dead. Lifeless trees stood like towers all around me, reaching up to the midnight black sky.

Large stones and animal bones were scattered around the single only path I was mindlessly walking along.

'Why was I here?'

'What was I doing?'

Thoughts flooded endlessly through my mind as I kept moving. They didn't seem to stop, just passing though my hollow head.

I wanted to stop. To see where I was! But my commands were ignored as my mindless body continued on, moving like a zombie along the path.

'Stop! I don't want to continue. Stop!!' I shouted hopelessly.

I had a bad feeling about where I was heading and I didn't want to end up there, I wanted to stop.

I focussed everything. Every thought and feeling, tying to stop my legs from continuing there hurried pace.

My mind screamed and shouted, focussed and wished, but it was useless, my mindless figure climbed higher and higher, wondering around in this unknown dark, morbid world.

Suddenly my feet stopped, followed by my whole body freezing.

Without me saying my head moved up and looked towards the sky, staring hard at the moon.

'What was I doing?'

'Why was I staring at the moon?'

I didn't know. Nothing in my body was listening.

But slowly to my bewilderment the stars in the night sky began to fade. Leaving the moon by herself in the black space, all alone.

My eyes were still locked on her, seeming to ask her something, seeming to want something.

I didn't know what happened next. Just that everything went blurry and I felt my legs give way.

Suddenly I was on my knees and hands in the dirt, staring at the floor.

'What the?'

I struggled with all my might to look down and see what was wrong. My legs were encased in immense pain, shaking violently, I could've screamed.

'What's going on?'

Suddenly my eyes shifted and I was looking down at the horrific sight. My mouth opened and piecing scream echoed out of my throat, slicing through the silent air around me.

Tears started to flow from my eyes, running down paths they knew so well.

My eyes stared in horror as thick crimson oozed out of invisible wounds on my legs, followed by deep gashes appearing everywhere.

'Help me'

I whimpered inside as my hands attacked my legs, trying to stop the continuous bleeding.

"HELP ME!"

My voice shouted, echoing around the dead forest before returning to my ears in a sick painful scream.

"I'm all alone."

'No you're not, you have people around you that care for you.'

I shouted at myself.

"All alone"

My body shook as sobs racked over my body, instantly I held my head in my blood-covered hands.

It felt like I was only a small person, trapped in the body of another. Watching, feeling, seeing what they did.

But then why did it feel like my body? If it was, why didn't I have control?

I was blinded and ripped out of my thoughts as my head suddenly whipped up. Straining to see through the bright light, which was approaching me at a rapid speed. It's warmth soaking through my skin and into my bones.

I felt utter bliss in this unknown light, I could just let go and drift away. Forever…

I was roughly shaken awake by two hands gripped tightly on my shoulders.

"Kate! Kitten? Wake up…."

I blinked rapidly, allowing my eyes to adjust to the harsh light around me before turning wearily around in my position by the bed. The hard chair hurting my side as I swivelled.

"Want anything?"

May asked, keeping a warm hand on my shoulder.

I shook my head lightly and smiled sadly at her.

"I'm not hungry."

She looked at me, a sad expression passing over her face as she glanced at the figure occupying the bed.

"You can't beat yourself up over this. It ain't your fault."

"I know."

I said weakly, turning back around in the chair.

"Tala and I are going to get dinner, we'll be back in awhile."

I nodded and turned, smiling lightly at the familiar Red Head, who was leaning casually with one shoulder on the doorframe. A neutral expression on his face, but one of content, he had everything back.

He smiled back at me.

I must say he looked much better then the other times I had seen him, he looked nearly normal, back in his healthy toned shape and die for looks. But he still has a lot of eating to catch up on.

I had pulled him aside earlier and confessed nearly everything, holding back a few things. But I basically poured my heart out to him.

Told him how I had been such a bitch and hoped that he could find it in his heart to forgive me, surprisingly and to my happiness he forgave me and said he understood why I had reacted the way I did. He would have gone along the same lines to, but told me in the future to listen.

I understood what he meant and I would listen to my best friends. Doesn't matter what situation we are in.

"I'll see you later."

He said before turning and walking with May out the door. The door closed with a soft click behind him, stopping my view of the corridor.

Once again the room was shrouded in silence, only the rhythmic beeping of the heart monitor and 'tic, tic, ticing' of the drip could be heard.

I sighed heavily, my chest heavy with guilt and sorrow.

This was entirely my fault.

Looking up I was hit hard with the vision of me, the horror film site reflecting off the mirror from across the room.

I had a black, deep purple hand sized bruise on my cheek, purple and black extending all the way from my cheek to around my eye and along my jaw.

My eye was swollen so was the side of my mouth, it had gone down since I had arrived but it still looked bad.

I couldn't see it but I knew my stomach was covered in large black bruises with thin red lines running over them, all the size of round walkmans.

Bryan had bruised the bottom of my rib cage but luckily no internal bleeding was apparent.

But for Bret the story was far beyond horrific.

I shifted my gaze away from the mirror and onto the figure in the bed, who was tightly wrapped in the white crisp hospital sheets.

Many mechanical tubes were coming out of various body parts. He had those god-awful tubes in his nose to help with his breathing.

I had asked the nurse why he needed those. He was breathing fine. She just gave me a look, which I took as you-wouldn't-want-to-know.

So to say the least I was scared witless.

I hadn't gotten much out of the doctor as he insisted that he was going to be fine and if anything really serious was wrong he would tell us, but for the time being information was kept for only the parents.

Which just made me mad, I had a right to know too, I was his friend.

But from what I could see visibly it was bad, he had worse bruises then me over his chest and stomach, though bandages now covered them.

I had over heard the nurse say he had a few broken ribs, but that's all I could hear. His face was a mess of colours and he would get a lovely shiner.

It was sick to say the least and I was the cause of this. It was my fault! I had caused this!

"It's all my fault! It's entirely my fault! Why did you have to do that!?! Why?"

I gripped the crisp white fabric tightly in two fists as my body racked in sobs. I buried my face in the sheets, crying my eyes out, the tears soaking the white material as I layed their next to Bret.

I blamed myself! It was my fault!

I repeated that over and over again it was my fault and I believed it.

A soft knock at the door caused me to slowly lift my head.

"Who is it?"

I sniffed, wiping my tears away quickly.

"It's me dear."

"Come in."

I croaked as I recognised the voice.

The door opened slowly and a tall women with chestnut brown hair, pulled into a high ponytail walked in, her shimmering forest green eyes were saddened. She glanced at me and a frown graced her lips.

I had gotten to know Bret's Mother quite well and she was a really kind lady. She could be strict when needed be but she had a huge heart.

It still made no sense to me, how she could marry a man that she did, abusive, violent. But I guess she probably had no choice.

"Oh dear, what are you doing?"

She strode over to me, instantly engulfing me in a hug, wiping the fresh tears from my face.

"It's my fault"

I chocked as sobs took over my body once again.

"Hush dear, hush, its not you fault. If we should blame anyone it's the monster that did this to you and my dear son. It's not your fault in anyway."

Mrs. Nonnigon soothed, patting my back lightly.

"We'll find him and he'll pay."

She pulled back and smiled down at my, wiping the tears away from my eyes again, taking care not to irritate my bruise.

"So don't blame yourself dear."

She placed a soft kiss on my forehead before straightening up, taking note that I had stoped crying.

Even though I didn't believe her, I did believe Bryan had to pay.

"What are you going to do?"

I said in between hick ups as I looked over to Bret.

"He'll go to jail for a long time I hope."

She smiled sadly and looked over to her son, pushing his hair lightly out of his eyes and placing a soft kiss on his cheek.

"He's so peaceful when he's asleep."

She muttered in thought as she stared blankly at him.

"All the worries of the world seem to wash away."

I looked at her, many thoughts running though my own head.

Realising I was sitting and Mrs. Nonnigon was sanding I quickly rose.

"Here have a seat."

"There is no need."

She insisted, waving her hand for me to sit again.

"No, I need to stretch my legs anyway."

I took a step forward, my body seemed to lose all energy and I dropped. Luckily Mrs. Nonnigon caught me and worry crossed her face.

"My, my, dear, you look extremely tired. You should go home and get some rest."

"No, I must stay here, just in case he wakes. Anyway, I don't really have a true home."

I said softly, shifting my eyes to the ground so Mrs. Nonnigon couldn't see the pain and suffering that was burning brightly.

"Stubborn, that's all I can say. You are just like my son sometimes."

She smiled as I stood up again and took a few steps back. I rubbed my eyes lightly, my tiredness getting the better of me as I could barely keep my eyes open.

"Well you can't sleep in the chair, you'll get a terrible back. So you'll just have to bunk next to Bret, only option as this is a one bed room."

"But I can't—"

"Nonsense, you can. As you can see it isn't exactly a small hospital bed. My dear husband insists on having everything large."

"But—"

"No buts, just hop in. I also believe that he needs some more warmth, he is dead cold."

She smiled, placing the back of her hand on his forehead.

"Come on, in you get, you need to sleep."

I walked slowly over to the bed, dragging my feet, hoping that I would fall asleep now on the spot so I didn't have to move anywhere.

"Oh move your little arse."

Mrs. Nonnigon chirped, pushing me quickly over to the bed. She sat me down and took of my shoes.

I didn't object as she layed my down next to Bret, making sure I wasn't laying on anything. She tucked me in and smiled warmly.

"There, it's not so bad. Anyway, I better be off, I have a house to manage and I can trust you with my son, you will phone me when anything changes."

I nodded and watched as she walked out of the room, switching the light off so that the room was instantly shrouded in darkness.

I was alone once again. I could feel the bed move slightly with every breath Bret took in.

"My fault."

I chocked.

Tears started to fill my eyes again as I pushed myself backwards, settling my back against his arm, giving him some heat at least.

Slowly I drew my knees to my chest and held them close, my tears wetting the pillow as they ran down my cheek once again.

"All my fault."

I sobbed, crying once again. I felt guilty. It was my fault, doesn't matter what anyone says, I got involved with Bryan and because of that everyone got hurt.

My eyes slowly closed, I couldn't ward off sleep any longer. Silently I cried myself into a restless sleep, haunted my monsters from the dark.

"WHAT IS THAT THING DOING IN THAT BED!!!"

My eyes snapped open immediately as the aggressive voice boomed though the room.

I quickly looked over to the door where a tall, strong looking man, with dark chocolate brown hair and pale green eyes stood glaring angrily at me.

His jaw was tight and rugged, he looked build for combat and his eyes were hard as stone, reminding me somewhat of Bryan.

"Dear don't be so loud, she was just resting."

I looked behind the bulky man's shoulder to see Mrs. Nonnigon, dressed in a nice causal dress, pleading with the man in front of her to drop his voice and temper.

I gasped in realisation as I pieced together who this man might be.

"Mr. Nonnigon."

I blurted out, instantly stumbling out of the bed and onto my feet, swaying a little, as I tried to adjust to the sudden change in temperature and environment.

"She is awake, then away with her."

Before I really knew what was happening Mr. Nonnigon was shoving me roughly out the door.

I glanced back at Bret who was still deep in sleep, lying in the same spot as last night.

Then to Mrs. Nonnigon, who mouthed 'sorry,' before the door was slammed loudly in my face as I stood silently in the corridor.

I stayed there looking at the door stunned and in fear. Mr. Nonnigon was a scary looking person.

I moved and leant against the wall beside the door, listening to the rising voices behind. One belonging to Mrs. Nonnigon and the other Mr. Nonnigon, I wondered if this was what Bret had to face everyday.

After fighting about me for awhile their fight started to reach the maximum point and I feared what would happen. Mr. Nonnigon, to me, was known to have a temper.

"Our son is in a hospital bed and all you can think about is the money it costs!"

Mrs. Nonnigon shrieked.

"Oh woman shut your stupid mouth. This is all my son is good for, spending and taking my money."

"You forget that he is my son too and he deserves the best there is."

"He deserves nothing more then a cardboard box to live in."

"Don't you dare talk about our son this way, you are stupid to even think such thi—"

I could hear a smack and a painful gasp from behind the wooden door, my head dropped and I felt tears os utter sorrow well up in my eyes.

He was like Bryan in so many ways. But Mr' Nonnigon was more of a money hungry beast, that only cares about his well being and no one else's.

All I could hear now was muffled voices, as the argument behind the door hushed.

I closed my eyes, trying to ward away images of what Bret might have had to go though as a child and even now. It was too painful for me to think about now, even with my problems.

"Kitten?"

I looked up, staring down the corridor as a familiar red head walked steadily towards me. His hands placed casually in his pockets, head held high.

"Nice to see you're back."

I stated bowing my head again as I felt tears threatening to spill once again.

I could hear Tala stopping in front of me, the tips of his shoes visible in my restricted view of only the floor.

"Are you ok?"

"No."

I said bluntly, lifting my eyes to look up at him. His mouth was opening and shutting like he wanted to say something but didn't know how to say it.

"That's not something you hear everyday."

He finally said, probably giving up on trying to find words and thought to turn the situation into a joke, but it wasn't working.

"Why!"

I croaked as I flung myself forward onto his shoulder, gripping the back of his t-shirt tightly as tears sprung to life.

"Why so many tears? Life's not so bad."

"But it is."

I said, my voice muffled by the fabric of his shirt.

Tala rubbed soothing cycles on my back as I broke down crying, pouring every sad, morbid emotion out in wet salty droplets.

This was getting too much for me, Bryan, Mr. Nonnigon, Bret like this. Why did I have to deal with it?!? Why??

I stood there in Tala's arms for what seemed like hours. Being held until I had stopped crying and felt able to leave his warm embrace.

Straightening myself I stepped back, noticing the saddened look on his face.

"Well there goes my new shirt."

He joked, tugging at the huge wet patch on his shoulder.

I smiled sadly at him. This was just like Tala.

"Thank you."

I said softly, leaning back against the wall.

"I ready needed to do that."

"Anytime Kitten, I'm not going anywhere."

Tala looked down at me. Concern and truth was burning bright as the sun in his blue eyes.

I knew he wouldn't leave my side, even if god commanded him to. He was too loyal to do that, he always told May and I that he thought of us as his wolf pack and that he felt like he was the head wolf, holding all the responsibility for our well being.

I was brought out of my thoughts by the door beside me being swung loudly open. Mr. Nonnigon stalking briskly out, followed closely by Mrs. Nonnigon who had a red hand mark on the side of her face.

They continued to walk down the corridor and around the corner out of site, not a word being exchanged between them and me.

Stepping away from the wall I moved to the door ready to go back in. I could see Tala following me from the corner of my eye, taking a step closer.

I turned around and looked at him.

"I need to go in by myself Tala."

Slowly I looked to the ground. I had to tell someone, I had to tell him everything and I felt I had to do it now or I would never tell anyone anything of my problems. Even if he couldn't hear me or reply at least I was going to tell someone.

"I need to be alone with Bret for awhile."

Tala nodded slowly in understanding.

"Ok, I'll be right outside the door."

I smiled at him before turning back around and disappearing into the room, closing the door slowly behind me.

The room was still dark, only strips of light getting through from the blinds on the only window. The monitors beeped rhythmically away.

I took a deep breath.

"Now or never."

Slowly I walked over to the edge of the bed, again taking a seat in the hard chair. I cupped my hands together and layed then on the bed. Taking another ragged breath I looked at Bret.

"Here we go. Bret I dunno if you can hear me but I have something to tell you…."

Then I did it I poured everything out. Talked about the first time I met him, what I did to myself, how I had hurt my friends, how Bryan had hurt May, how I had treated Tala, about my parents, grandparents, self-brutalisation. Feelings, thoughts, doings, seeing, I needed to get everything off my chest.

"That's why I don't know why you did that Bret. Why did you help a useless piece of trash that had hurt you so much??…why???!!!"

Tears were now flowing endlessly down my cheeks, I had confessed everything and now I just felt utter shame and sorrow.

I dropped my head into the sheets again, hiding my face.

Suddenly I felt a hand on the back of my head, the soft warmth tingling along my scull. Slowly I lifted my head, the hand followed to, cupping one side of my face.

"Because I love you and no one should ever treat you that way, no one!"

I couldn't help but brake out into a smile.

"Bret."

I shouted, flinging myself on top of him, encasing him in a hug.

"Ah! watch the ribs."

He hissed slightly.

"Sorry."

Bret smiled as I sat beside him on the bed. He removed the devise from around his head and chucked it aside.

"You are awake, but for how long."

"Since my parents barged in, I felt you jumping up."

He frowned slightly.

"So you heard everything."

I muttered, dropping my head.

A finger hooked under my chin, forcing me to look up. My eyes locked with his, an emotion burning brightly in his eyes that I had never seen since my parents died.

"We have our problems and we will deal with them together."

My head was guided forward and Bret pressed his lips against mine. His ran his tongue along my lower lip. The sudden movement causing me to gasp, allowing him entry. His tongue glided over mine, Bret slowly starting to deepen the kiss, moving his hand behind my head so I couldn't pull back.

To tell the truth I didn't want to pull back, I felt utter bliss. He tasted so sweet of cinnamon.

Bret slowly pulled back, only to regain his breath.

Panting myself I leant my forehead against his. My heart was beating a million miles an hour and I could feel my pulse racing, the blood rushing instantly to my ears. I had never felt like this before.

I closed my eyes, taking in Bret's smell, remembering everything about him in thought. His outline, his face, I saw everything just like a picture.

That lopsided grin he sometimes had on his face, the look he gave me when I entered the room, like his world had just lit up.

The tone of his voice, the special walk that was his and only his, the walk that always reminded me of a hot summers day while laying on a beach with a lemonade in hand, that airy refreshing but burdened walk.

I moved my hands and cupped his faces, remembering the words he had just said to me. 'I love you.'

Something suddenly clicked inside of me and I smiled, opening my eyes to look into his.

"Bret."

"Hmm."

"I love you to."

I moved forward, locking lips with him once more. This time, I was returning the feeling.

Not much I can say….. Don't want to ruin the moment so I'll say something next time.

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