Disclaimer: Not mine, never has been, never will be.

A/N: I know I wrote END at the end of the previous chapter, but one of the reviews I received convinced me to write more. I'm not good at multiple chapter stories, so I'm not going to make any promises I will continue this one. To tell the truth, planning multiple chapter stories frustrate me a lot.

Pairing: N/S

Nick's POV

I watch her passing his office for the hundredth time. Conflicting emotions gracing her beautiful face. I know her so well, sometimes I wish I didn't, because often her insecurities as an addition to my own are just too much to deal with.

I don't know exactly when I started to fall for her. It might very possibly be the day I laid eyes on her, but this last year I started to crave for her presence to surround me, yearning for her to touch me; the withdrawal symptoms hitting me with full force whenever we weren't together. It was then that I noticed that she depended on the physical connection, no matter how innocent, just as much as I did.

We chose to take the long slow secret road. A choice that wasn't really a mutual agreement, but I figured the twists and turns in the road ahead of us were going to cause enough turmoil in my life, so I didn't fight her. I have a problem denying her anything. My need to comfort people is one of my strong points, but one of my weaker ones as well. It's something I need to work on, because her ideas are not always very rational, causing a mess in her personal life, which is now undeniably linked with mine.

I never was in favor of keeping this a secret, but now all of a sudden I want to keep this a secret, I want us to be a secret. I observe her, observing him. It's something we like to do. It's not something professional, although we like to pretend it is.

Slowly I get up, not shifting my gaze directed at her. I'm not sure how I will convince her, but I have to try. I already know she will not go for it. She is too stubborn. I know her so well, but I have no idea why she suddenly wants to go public with our still so fragile relationship.

Yesterday while we were lying in bed, our safe haven, our refuge, she turned to me and said we shouldn't keep it a secret. She said, no she told me, that next shift she would tell Grissom. It was no point of discussion, the decision was already made for me. She never offered me an explanation and I never asked for one as fear was already griping my heart. After a long silence I asked if I should go with her, for you know, support and all that. The look on her face told me she wasn't buying it.

You already know the outcome of her answer to that not so subtle question of mine, since I have been watching her, instead of joining her, gathering courage to tell him, the man of her past affections, she finally made the decision he couldn't make. I guess that will be the main topic of their conversation, because she never told me what she was going to tell him exactly. At this moment my wish to know is getting stronger by the second. It is getting overwhelming. I didn't want push her, because talking about emotions are still a difficult point in our relationship and at that moment of her making the decision that she really has chosen for me I didn't want to push my luck and question her motives.

My thoughts have distracted me so much that I haven't noticed that the feared conversation has already taken place in front my eyes. I watch her leaving his office, I watch her notice me in front of that same office, I try to shift my gaze, but I can't. I need to know if she's still mine, if she will stay mine forever as far as I am concerned.

I'm glad I know her so well; that I can read her mind better than I can make sense of my own. We are going to be okay, I think we always were.